Teheran-ro, Samseong 1(il)-dong, Gangnam-gu, Seoul, South Korea

February 1

𝐇𝐞𝐫

I was facing outside the window, looking at the people who walk by the sidewalk with big smiles on their faces. I wonder when can I finally let myself be that happy where all of my worries are gone, I don't have anything to stress about and just enjoy spending time with my girls before they grew up before my eyes. Aish, Kwon Jiyong until when do I think of you. You really want me to suffer, just a thought of you makes my head hurt so much. Me, thinking deeper has come to an end when Siwon Oppa suddenly flicked my forehead. 

"Yah, Kim Taeyeon! I'm talking about many things here and you don't even give me a single glance at me just for me to know that I'm still talking to someone? I know something's bothering you, Taeng-ah. You know me and your other oppadeuls are here for you." He told me while staring at the road. Yep, He's the one driving since he insisted, we used my car since I brought mine when I went to Sm Ent. earlier,

"No Oppa, just thinking about something but it's just little things. You know that I took a break for almost two years. I feel very overwhelming to be back by now. I thought that I would have at least a month or two before going back to work. I guess SM wants me to make money for them immediately," I joked trying to divert Oppa's attention. 

"Aigoo, it's good that you're back Taeng. You don't know how much we miss our bubbly girl. We asked all of the girls and your closest friends if they have any idea where you went but none of them knew anything. We're so devastated that you left suddenly without telling anything to us why and where are you staying." Siwon Oppa complained. 

I chuckled, "I'm sorry Oppa. I'm very sure you know why. I know you and the Oppas dig deep why would I leave without telling a word. And I'm also sure that the other SM Oppas know about it already." I told him.

"Of course, we knew Taeng. We just want to hear it coming from you. We were furious at what he did to you, countless men want you to be their girl but he just did that to you. He doesn't appreciate you nor love you considering he did that to you for an amount of time. We told you, Taeng that man is a piece of bad news for you. He just plays around with girls like girls are just toys for him to play with. He changes his lover instantly just like how he likes to change his clothes. No wonder he's called the fashionista king in our industry. " he chuckled. 

"I know that Oppa that he has that playboy image around girls but we were in a relationship for years. I know even just for a short time, he did love me, like who would stay in a relationship that long if he didn't love me for a little bit? But I think it's not meant for us to stay together forever. And what do you mean that countless men liked to be in a relationship with me? Who would want to be in a relationship with a woman who has many issues like me? A depressed woman with a lot of trust issues with her?" I crossed my arms at him, questioning him. 

"You know very well what I meant, Tae," he said, I just looked over him and showed a little smile. 

"You know Oppa that I'm not ready to enter any relationship right now, right? I just need a little more time who knows what will happen when I'm ready but now let's just enjoy being like this. Besides, I will be always here, I will always be you and Oppas' baby Taeng." I told him.

In case you're wondering, yes Siwon Oppa attempted to court me in the past but he was late since I and Jiyong are already in a relationship back then. Nobody knew from our company that I was dating him since I knew how would they react if they knew that's why I kept it from them. Jiyong would always remind me not to go near Siwon Oppa because he can feel that he has something for me and he sensed that he has liked me and considering to confess but I didn't notice when we were still young.

Siwon Oppa would always ask me from time to time if I had eaten already or did I rest after a long day of work. He would always look after my health and would always remind me to take care of myself more. He would give me food while working especially when I'm in the company. I thought that those gestures were pure concerned Oppa for me. But one day, he asked me if I was done working and he asked me if I could go out on dinner with him, I accepted it since I thought it was just a normal date between a brother and a sister. 

But he clearly has another plan. He set us up to have dinner at a fancy restaurant with no other people since he booked the entire restaurant for us. I asked him why would he do that, I said that we could just have dinner at a normal diner at a much cheaper price in a casual setting. He shrugged it off and said it was no big deal, as the night goes by you can sense that he seems very nervous. I asked him why does he look like he's gonna pee on his pants. Then, that moment came. He confessed that he wants to court me and he sees me more than his sister. I was shocked because Ji was right. I remember that I and Ji would have these small fights because of Siwon Oppa. He would always accuse Siwon Oppa of catching feelings for me and that I would quickly deny it since I thought it would be impossible that Siwon Oppa would like me because I always thought of him as my brother from another mother here in our industry. 

That night I also confessed to him that I was already in a relationship and I also said that my boyfriend was none other than Kwon Jiyong. He was really shocked because he didn't think that I and Jiyong would become an item. We were clearly the opposites, but just like what they would say opposites attract. Yeah, opposites do attract but I guess it doesn't stay that way for too long. Going back, starting that night every Oppa in our company knew that I was dating Kwon Jiyong and they all bombarded me with concerned thoughts that why would I allow myself to date him where I heard everything that happened in his previous dating scandals. But I always reassure them that they have nothing to worry about my relationship with Jiyong because he treats me like his queen but look where we are right now. 

Thinking back wondering if I didn't consider dating him if I didn't succumb to his charming ways towards me, what would happen now? Where would I be and everything would definitely be different. At least for now, I really thanked the heavens because if I hadn't met him I wouldn't have my precious girls now. I just want to go home and cuddle with my girls. I already miss them even though I was only away for only five hours or less. I just smiled at Siwon Oppa as he continues to drive our way to the restaurant where we will have our mini lunch with the other SuJu Oppas. 

We arrived at the restaurant after 10 more minutes of driving. I went down from the car and went towards the door. There I saw Heechul Oppa shouting my name. 

"Kim Taeyeon, you rascal! Come here quickly! You need a little bit of beating!" Heechul Oppa reprimanded and I just shook my head at him. I quickly went to him and hug him. I really missed him, Heechul Oppa has been always there for me whenever I needed someone. Even if I didn't ask him to be there, he will always feel that something was troubling me and he wouldn't stop until I spilled everything to him. He would be there offering his shoulders for me to cry on, he wouldn't say anything but he will listen