A month had passed. 

Seulgi and Irene getting closer and closer day by day. Weekdays, Irene always pick Seulgi up after she finished her classes and went straight to a restaurant for dinner. On weekends, mostly they spent their times at homes and the communicate through phone calls and messages. For the past one month, Irene realized she had grew fond of Seulgi since forever. She's not afraid with the fact that she have fallen inlove with the monolid girl. Her best friend Joy is happy to finally see Irene had moved on from Jennie. 

But bringing the topic about Jisoo and Jennie still is a sensitive one for neither of them to brought it up. Since Irene still have slightly dissapointment and embarrassement because of Jisoo. Also she still feel responsible of what Jisoo had done to Seulgi in the past. For the past one month, Irene has been so protective of Seulgi. Asking where is she going, is she okay, is she had eaten yet, with whom she is, and other several questions that didn't make Seulgi felt uncomfortable. She felt more like Irene is taking care of her. 

To her very dumb a** and slow respond, Seulgi didn't know that what Irene did was actually because she love her. It's like a hidden code, telling Seulgi that she care and love her. But Seulgi didn't realized. More like she doesn't want to come to conclusion that Irene is one of the LGBTQ+ girl. She still think that Irene is straight because Irene never told her anything about her uality. 

Everyday is always about Seulgi and never in their time they talked about Irene's life. That's the point. Irene always wanted all of this about Seulgi. She never wanted that girl to ask her about her life. Moreover talking about her sister. She still need to keep it a secret about her being Jisoo's older sister. She wasn't ready to told her that and probably won't be able to do that ever. 

All Irene wanted is to focus everything to Seulgi. Every single thing and that's what she had been doing for the past one month. Slightly Irene could see Seulgi is changing. Even though she's still afraid to admit her uality but slowly Irene could see she's moving on from Jisoo. Wendy used to told her about Seulgi's nightmare. Where she always dreamt about the moment where Jisoo left her in the airport. It was before Irene's arrival. About a week after that, Yeri told Wendy, Seulgi been sleeping very well lately. Which is a good sign for Irene. 

It just a matter of time for Seulgi to finally accept her uality and moving on from Jisoo like Irene had completely moved on from Jennie. 

Wendy on the other hand, had been watching Irene and Seulgi closely. She had this slight fate telling her that Irene love Seulgi. Not just Irene but Seulgi too. But she knew her best friend is still blinded by her past and being all the stubborn and slow girl Seulgi is, Wendy couldn't tell her anything until the time is right. 

The way Irene treat Seulgi is more than just a friend. She can see that. What kind of friend who actually picking up Seulgi after her classes ended and went straight to a fancy restaurant for a dinner? And then sending messages with several question which only a couple will ask. Seulgi is just too blind to see it but Wendy can. 

She realized she need to do something. Seulgi have been suffering too long and the chance is right infront of her. Irene is the answer to her healing time. She just need to make Seulgi realized it by talking to her. It is the only way for the monolid girl to realized her feeling and not blinded by Jisoo. 

Currently, Wendy is waiting for Seulgi in their usual spot in the campus garden. She bet Irene is driving Seulgi to the university. Did Wendy ever felt jealous? No. She never. She felt happy for her best friend and also sad for Irene since she knew that the older girl love Seulgi meanwhile her best friend being the most dumbest person ever for not realizing her feeling for Irene. 

"Seungwan-ah!" 

"Oh Seulgi-ah" 

"Did you wait too long?" Wendy shook her head.

"No. I just came actually" 

"Well that's great" said Seulgi while taking a sit beside Wendy. 

Today just like the other day. Seulgi with her glowing and happy face just like the other day. For the past one month, Wendy saw how Seulgi become more cheerful day by day and that's because of Irene. That girl really bring so much effect for Seulgi and Wendy couldn't be anymore thankful for Irene. She's changing Seulgi to become better and better everyday. 

"Wendy"

"Oh, wae?" 

"Irene is inviting you for dinner in her house tonight Would you like to come?" 

"Sure. I heard her dishes is good" 

Seulgi let out a laugh because she agreed with Wendy. No one can compete with Irene dishes. It's so good and tasty. 

~~~

"Unnie did I ever agreed to this?" said Joy with her lazy face.

"You're my best friend. Why should I ask for you agreement?"

"UNNIE!"

Currently Irene invited Joy to come with her to the supermarket since she promised Seulgi to make her dinner and she asked her to bring Wendy along later. Irene had asked Joy to come too but apparently she can't come since she have surgery later. So since Joy is having her free time, Irene came to her office and dragged her away from her office only to make Joy as her slave in the supermarket. 

Irene is picking some vegetables, meat, oil, and other things she needed to make her dishes later. While Joy is incharge with pushing the trolley and probably be the one who incharge with moving the plastic back to Irene's car later on. 

"Lower your voice Joy. We're in public place" tease Irene. Joy groan in frustration but ended up quiet after that. 

While Irene is busy choosing the ingredient for her dishes, Joy is watching her closely. She's been watching how Irene being all happy everyday. Like nothing really bothers her. It seems that being with Seulgi changes Irene. She become stronger than before. After she finished everything with Jennie and having Seulgi by her side, it changes her. Even though her planned was to fix Seulgi, at the same time she's fixing herself too. To become stronger and better each day.

Joy is proud of her best friend and happy for her. 

"Unnie"

"What?" 

"You know, you look so happy unnie"

"Huh? What are you talking about?" 

"I know you never done groceries shopping. You made Minho do it for you while you were here. But look at you now. Coming to the supermarket, buying groceries for your dinner with Seulgi later. You know you're changing" 

The moment Irene heard that, she stop what she was doing and form a smile on her face. It's true though. She had realized the changing for the past one month. She found herself being so protective of Seulgi and the feel of wanting to take care of Seulgi everyday. Right now she's picking up the best ingredient to make dinner for Seulgi later. It's rare to see her coming to the supermarket because she's too tired to do so. 

But today she insisted on going to the supermarket by herself to pick the groceries with her own eyes. She wanted to do something special for Seulgi and she realized how Seulgi changed her. Guess her best friend also realized it. 

"I love her, Joy"

"I know. I can see how your eyes sparkles everytime you talked about her" 

Irene let out a smile and continues what she was doing. 

She's going to make American dishes tonight. Hopefully Seulgi and Wendy will like it. 

~~~

"We have macaroni and cheese, baked beans, and meatloaf. Also kimchi. Korean never leave kimchi as their side dish" said Irene while putting the dishes on the table. 

Wendy and Seulgi who had sitted in the dining room couldn't help but being amazed by the dishes Irene made. Those food look so tasty and good. Seulgi, being the only girl who never been abroad look so amazed to see the dishes. For Wendy she realized she misses her foreign life in the past. She used to eat a lot of American food since she lived in Canada. 

"Woahh. Now I realized I miss Canada so much" said Wendy.

"It looks good Irene" 

"Well what are you guys waiting for? Dig in already!" said Irene sounded so excited. 

Three of them let out a smile and start digging in for the food. 

While eating they share small talk and sometimes jokes around. Mostly they talk about how Professor Suho has been giving them hard time by giving them homework and project. It's the usually thing a professor would do during their last year in the university. Not to mention they have to prepare a topic for their thesis as their last assignment before graduating. 

Seulgi and Wendy had chosen several topics for their thesis but haven't come up with a final decision. They plan to have it by the end of the week since they must start writing it and next week. So they didn't have much time left. Irene is listening to them carefully and sometimes give them advice for their thesis since she had done one in the past. Surely she is more experience on doing that. 

"Excuse me" said Seulgi probably headed out to the bathroom. 

Wendy and Irene was left alone in the dining room. Both of them still continue talking about campus life and also shared thing about what they misses about living abroad. Irene misses the beautiful wheather in New York and how the citizens look beautiful in summer clothes. Then they would talk about how beautiful the view were during autumn. The beautiful color of leaves during autumn look so beautiful. Especially the maple tree. 

Being all nostalgic make them laugh together. Remembering how good abroad life were. Soon they went silent. Irene take her time to look at her phone while Wendy is fighting with herself. She's thinking of asking Irene about Seulgi. She is sure Irene love Seulgi but she just wanted to make sure by asking her directly. This is the right time though. For the sake of her best friend. 

"Irene"

"Yes?" said Irene looking up to stare at Wendy.

"I want to ask you something"

"Oh. What is it?" 

"About Seulgi...you love her right?" 

Wendy surprise to see Irene didn't even flinch with the question. She's looking so relax. Different from what Wendy was expecting. 

"Yes, Wendy" 

"Umm...what I mean by that is-"

"I love her more than a friend, Wendy. If you were asking" said Irene with a smile. 

Irene had waited for this. She knew how Wendy really cares about Seulgi and she knew sooner or later Wendy will ask her this question. Wendy is a sensitive person. Irene knew that and she is sure Wendy had seen how she interact with Seulgi. It just a matter of time before Wendy ask her and it's seem the time is now.

"I love her with all my heart. You don't need to worry, Wendy. I will protect her. I will stay by her side" 

"I know, Irene. It just"

"I know how fragile she is. Her past made her like that and I wanted to help her heal. Her heart is broken and I will try to heal it" 

Wendy smile. She wasn't doubting Irene. She just wanna make sure that Irene really is the best for Seulgi. It seems she is and Irene said it will all her heart. She can see it from her eyes. Irene is so sure about it. Wendy couldn't be more thankful to Irene. She felt like crying to finally found the person who will help Seulgi. Even though Seulgi have Wendy by her side, she still need a person who love her. Who will make her realize that she is love and loving the same gender isn't a crime nor a sin. 

Irene is the one for Seulgi and Wendy knew it just a matter of time until Seulgi finally realize her feeling. In order to do that, Wendy will help Irene. For the sake of her best friend and also for Irene. Both Wendy and Irene make a smile. 

"So what did I miss guys?" said Seulgi.

"Nothing. We just finished our food" said Irene.

"Well it's time to wash the dishes!" said Seulgi sound so excited. 

Meanwhile on the other hand, Irene remembers how they used to stand so close that made her heart beating so fast. She wanted to stop that from happening again. When she was about to say something, Wendy speaks up.

"Let me and Seulgi clean up the dishes. We're the guest afterall"

"Isn't I suppose to do the dishes since I'm the one who invited you guys" said Irene which made them all laugh.

"It's okay Irene. Me and Wendy will do the wash" Irene nod before she headed to her bedroom to change.

While both of them doing the dishes, they stay quiet until Wendy finally open a conversation.

"Hey, Seulgi"

"Oh?"

"What do you think about Irene?" asked Wendy making Seulgi looked at her with questioning look.

"What do you mean?" 

"Well...do you like her?" asked Wendy literally said the point directly.

"Yeah. Of course I do" 

"Not as a friend, Seulgi" 

Seulgi bite the bottom of her lips and stop what she was doing. That question has been lingering in her mind for the past few weeks. She realized how she hadn't had that nightmares anymore ever since Irene came to her life. Then how Irene literally help her heal her broken heart. How she made her forget about Jisoo. Even though they had similarity, Seulgi gotten use to it.

She wasn't sure at first but each day she spent it with Irene, she felt this slight feeling in her heart. Telling her she wanted to be with Irene. But again she thought it just probably her missing Jisoo. Right now when Wendy asked her that question, she begins to question herself again. What if it's true that she love Irene the way she love Jisoo? Was it possible? In reality it is, but Seulgi seems can't accept it.

Wendy who see how Seulgi responded to her question, she knew at that moment Seulgi had been asking the same question to herself. But she knew her best friend so well. Seulgi probably lying to herself again. Lying by telling her that she just miss Jisoo but no. The feeling she have is love. She love Irene. Wendy can see how she look at Irene with those glowing eyes. It's time for Seulgi to wake up. She's been sleeping in the same time for too long. She needs to wake up and realize that she love Irene.

"I saw how you stare at her, Seulgi. You’re glowing everytime you talk about Irene. Your eyes can't lie" 

"I-I probably just miss Jisoo, Seungwan-ah. You know how they resemble so much"

"Please stop lying, Seulgi-ah. Jisoo is your past. Your present and your future is Irene" 

"No. Wendy-ah. Irene is just my friend. Also she's straight"

"And how do you know that?"

"Well, I mean look at her. She's beautiful and pretty. Probably she have lots of guys lining up to be her boyfriend"

"Had you asked her about that?"

"No"

"Then don't come into conclusion, Seulgi-ah" said Wendy hitting Seulgi hard.

"Seulgi-ah. I think it's time for you to open your heart. Wake up. You can't stuck with your past for your whole life"

"I can't! I can't, Wendy"

"Why?"

"Because Jisoo made me like this!" said Seulgi. 

Her eyes are teary and her body is shaking. Rather than saying she's angry, she's not. Seulgi is sad. Not because Wendy keep pushing her but she remember Jisoo. She remember how Jisoo used to promise forever to her. How she used to say that they will be friend forever with those beautiful smile form by the beautiful heart shape lips. How she remembers Jisoo's warm hug.

Then it just disappears in a second. How Jisoo left her with a kiss and then leaving her alone in the airport crying...hard. Didn't even bother to say proper goodbyes to her. Remembering those memories triggered her. 

No. Seulgi isn't stuck with her past. She's afraid of falling inlove that's why she keep making excuses saying she still love Jisoo and all that sh*t. Meanwhile she's hiding behind those lies. She's afraid of the word love. She's afraid that when she fall inlove again, the person who she fell inlove with will leave her...again. Just like how Jisoo did to her. 

Loving Irene can be so beautiful and addicting. But Seulgi knew she can't. She's broken, she's fragile. Falling inlove with Irene is just too possible for her. Irene is just too perfect for her and she doesn't deserve her at all. How can a perfect girl be together with a broken person like her? Seulgi doesn't want to take the risk. 

"Seulgi-ah" 

"I-I'm scared, Seungwan-ah" 

Wendy felt sorry for her best friend. Also she felt sorry for pushing her best friend. But she knew, Seulgi love Irene too. Only that Seulgi is still afraid of the word love. The trauma from the past hasn't heal fully. All Seulgi need is time. Time for her to heal. Even if it takes years to do it, Wendy willing to wait for her best friend to finally forget the past. Abandoning the dishes, Wendy take Seulgi for a hug and stay in that position for awhile. Not one of them realize, Irene heard all of it. Hiding behind the walls that separate the dining room and the living room. 

Slight tears fall down on her cheeks. Her body leaning against the wall and just stay there crying silently. Seeing how broken Seulgi is broke her heart. When the fact that her own sister is the one who did that to the monolid girl. She felt so guilty even though she wasn't the one who did that but still. As Jisoo's older sister, she feel responsible for what her sister did to Seulgi. 

The fact that Seulgi address as her close friend didn't really shock her. She wasn't here to make Seulgi fall inlove with her. She's here because she wanted to fix her. She wanted to heal her. But even after a month past few weeks, Seulgi seems still can't forget the past. Well it wasn't suprising though since the trauma isn't easy to heal. Seeing how Seulgi broke into tears with just a simple question about love, it made Irene realized Seulgi is just as fragile as a glass. When she fall, she could break into pieces so easily. 

That's what made Irene cry. Seeing how broken Seulgi is really broke her heart. If only there's drugs to heal Seulgi's broken heart, she will do anything just to find that drugs. But no. There is no drugs can help Seulgi to heal her broken heart. It's herself who can heal it. But in order to that, she must face the past. Be brave. But how can she do that when the only think that make her loses her brave is the one who made her fragile? 

The night passes with fakes smile forming on their faces and soon Wendy and Seulgi left Irene's house. Leaving the pain unspoken. 

~~~

Sitting on her bed looking down to the floor with tears falling down hard. With her pajama on, Seulgi couldn't go to sleep. The question Wendy asked keeps bothering her mind. Does she love Irene? Yes. But more than a friend? She's doubting it and it keeps hurting her heart.

Like her heart is against what she believe all this time. The fact that she still love Jisoo and Irene is just a friend nothing more than that. That facts kind a hurt her. Like her heart is broken into pieces. She's been asking herself the same question Wendy asked. 

More than that she hate herself for being a coward and for being so broken. She hates how Jisoo still have this effect on her and she can't stop feeling so broken. It makes her wanted to hurt herself and that's what she have been doing. The reason why she's crying is because she's hurting herself. Cutting her hand forming lines of blood and tears can't stop falling down. She hates everything about her and how Jisoo made her like this. 

Despite that, her mind keeps trying to wake her up. Questioning herself if she really fall inlove with Irene and asking herself what she had been doing for the past years. 

Am I've been sleeping this whole time? Sleeping in the same time while the world is already changing? Is it time for me to finally wake up and face the reality? The fact that Jisoo's in the past and my love for her doesn't exist anymore. Is it finally the time?

If it is then, will Irene be there when I wakes up? It seems that I grew attached on her and I'm afraid if I wake up Irene won't be there beside me. Irene...will you be by my side when I wakes up?