"Siyeon, please just sit down and breathe, you'll be fine."

Yoohyeon watched her friend walk nervously up and down the living room. She was fidgeting her fingers and mumbling some incoherent words as if she was casting some sort of magical spell.

Yoohyeon sighed and rolled her eyes. "When are you going to tell her?"

"I don't know! Soon? Ah, I can't do this Yoohyeon, I'll up everything, there's no way she feels the same, like what are the chances of that happening? Zero! I'm telling you! I'll just ruin our friendship..." Siyeon whined and shook her body like she was having a temper tantrum. She stopped when a pillow flew to her head.

"Hey! What was that for!" She leaned down to pick it off the floor and threw it back at the giggling girl on the couch.

"You're getting on my nerves! Just talk to her and you'll see that she feels the same. You're just being a big at this point."

Siyeon was ready to argue back when she was interrupted by a new presence in the room.

"Who's being a big ?" The owner of the voice ran their fingers through their hair and went to the kitchen to grab an apple.

"B-Bora, hey... You're back..." Siyeon gulped and looked over at Yoohyeon with absolute horror in her eyes making the other girl awkwardly smile.

"Yeah, I just came back from the dance studio. Who are you two gossiping about?"

She took a bite out of the apple and sat next to Yoohyeon who sat up a bit due to the sudden situation. Bora looked at both of the girls confused.

"Why are you being so mysterious, are you talking about me?" She joked and gave them a wink. She got two nervous forced laughs as an answer.

"No! No, no, no... Not about you!" Yoohyeon answered still chuckling weirdly making Bora even more confused.

Siyeon couldn't look at Bora. She was so pale in the face; it matched the white wall behind her.

"You two are such weirdos, I swear..." Bora exhaled loudly giving up on them and the tv. She leaned back on the couch and put her legs on it as well and ate her apple in peace while the two weirdos as she named them, didn't know how to act.

"So... You danced alone today?" Siyeon asked trying to change the topic. She turned her body to see the tv so she didn't have to look into Bora's eyes. She was definitely not ready. Not after she almost heard them.

She heard an "uh-uh" from Bora who couldn't answer as she was chewing her apple. "I was with Sooyeon."

Siyeon's head snapped from the tv screen to Bora.

"She's so so good. No wonder they hired her to be our choreographer."

"Y-Yeah..." Siyeon bit her lip and looked at Yoohyeon who looked up at her. They didn't need to talk. Their eyes said it all. They thought the same thing.

Bora had been spending way too much time with Sooyeon for Siyeon's liking. From day one, Bora and her became really close.

At first, it seemed normal. Bora was their best dancer. She was always the one closest to their choreographers. But with Sooyeon it was a bit different. Their interactions weren't friendly, at least from Siyeon's point of view. She thought she was just jealous, but lately the way they look at each other, the way they sometimes touch each other... It was just too much. It was one of the main reasons why Siyeon hesitated. Even though she was still close to Bora and nothing changed, with Sooyeon arriving, Siyeon's confidence was at its lowest point.

Siyeon blinked a few times looking away. She hated how easy it was for her tears to find her eyes.

"Um, I'm going to bed, see you tomorrow."

She left before Bora or Yoohyeon could say anything.

Getting into her bed she pulled her duvet over her head and pressed her face into her pillow hoping it would silence out her sobs. She didn't want to cry. She cried already so many times, she stopped counting. After a while, her phone screen lighted up and she wiped her tears away to check it.

[Yoohyeonn <3]
Do you want me to come over? :(

[Siyeon ^<^]
I'm fine, you don't have to <3

[Yoohyeonn <3]
You sure? :/

[Siyeon ^<^]
Yes :)

[Yoohyeonn <3]
I don't believe you, but I'll let you be :/ <3
It will be okay, maybe you're looking too deep into it?

[Siyeon ^<^]
I don't think so... At this point what can I do? Bora's way too into her. She only talks of her and how great she is. It's too obvious. I ed up by being late. There's no way I'll ever confess.

[Yoohyeonn <3]
Siyeon :(

[Siyeon ^<^]
Practice tomorrow will be fun... :/
I'm going to sleep now, night Yoohyeon <3

[Yoohyeonn <3]
Stay strong :(
Night night <3

Siyeon wiped away her tears and put her phone away to charge. She her back and closed her eyes.

She cursed at herself for waiting so long. She had this crush for as long as she could remember yet no confidence. Once she started getting close to confessing, something always popped up. Days passed and now it was probably too late.

With thoughts running a marathon through her head, she eventually got tired and fell asleep.

--

Siyeon avoided eye contact with both Bora and Sooyeon ever since arriving at the studio. She could hear them laugh about something. With each laugh, her heart broke a bit more. She tried so hard to shut it out and talked to other members instead. Yoohyeon rubbed her back, but it didn't help much. She gave the taller girl a small smile.

"Okay, let's go over with what we have so far. We still need to finish the choreography." Sooyeon said as she stood in front and the girls got into position. Siyeon quickly glanced over at Bora who was grinning looking at the floor waiting for the cue to start. Siyeon looked away and didn't hear Sooyeon telling her that she needed to move more to the right.

"Sorry..." Siyeon muttered and did what was asked of her.

Bora looked over and their eyes met for the first time today. Siyeon could feel her heart skip when the other girl smiled at her. Her instant response was to smile back. It didn't mean much as Bora's eyes were already on Sooyeon again. Siyeon looked over at Yoohyeon who didn't dare to look back. She knew.

The music finally started and they practiced the new dance for a while. Sooyeon added a few new elements and removed some parts and Siyeon couldn't lie, she was extremely talented. As much as she was jealous, Sooyeon's feeling for dance was really special. No wonder Bora liked her so much.

Siyeon did her best to focus on the choreo but got caught zoned out or out of place multiple times.

"Siyeon, what's with you today? We have so much to go through yet we keep getting setbacks because you constantly up."

Hearing that from Bora hurt. A lot.

As much as Bora was a carefree, crazy person, she took her dancing very seriously. Whenever they learn something new, she would go into this zone and wouldn't even realize what she was saying. It often caused petty arguments.

"I'm sorry... I'm just out of it..." Siyeon tried to explain and looked down at her feet. Minji suggested they take a short break. More for Bora than for others. She needs to cool down.

--

The rest of the practice went by well. Bora didn't complain much and Siyeon's focus was better. She still messed up a few times, but it wasn't as frequent as before. She was glad once it was all over.

They picked their stuff up and went out of the studio. Siyeon being the first one to leave, Bora, of course, said she would stay.

Siyeon was almost out of the company when she realized she forgot her phone at the table. She jogged back and opened the door.

"Hey have-"

She stopped as soon as she saw the scene in the studio. Parting their lips, Bora's and Sooyeon's eyes were opened wide as they stared back at the girl who never wanted to witness this scene.

"Siyeon..." Bora began but didn't know how to finish.

Siyeon ran away as quickly as she could. She didn't care for her phone anymore. She hated herself for going back for it. She didn't have to see that. She knew it. She knew she was too late. She knew she had been giving herself false hope.

She knew everything as she ran through the streets with tears streaming down her face, bumping into people and pushing them to get away. Get away as far as possible.

She kept running and running until her already tired legs gave up on her and she sat down on the sidewalk in some empty neighborhood. Trying to catch her breath she stared down with hands in her hair. Dark dots were appearing one by one on the ground as she helplessly cried feeling the heartache growing in her chest.

--

"What are we going to do?! I told you we'd get caught eventually..." Sooyeon sighed and put her hands on her head intertwining her fingers.

"It's okay, it's only Siyeon, she won't say anything, I'm sure of it." Bora walked around not sure if she believed her words.

The two girls didn't talk when they heard a phone buzz. Bora walked over and noticed it was Siyeon's phone. She glanced over the screen and furrowed her eyebrows.

[Yoohyeonn <3]
Hey where are you? :/
Did you talk to Bora about it?

Bora bit her lip and picked up the phone. She knew Siyeon's password and wanted to know what was all of this about even though she knew what she was doing was wrong.

She scrolled up the conversation and dropped her jaw as her brain slowly pieced everything together.

"You alright?" Sooyeon started walking over and Bora quickly exited the texts and put the phone back down. She turned to Sooyeon and nodded.

She couldn't help but have guilt written all over her face. She feels like maybe she led Siyeon on with her actions. She was like that with other members as well, just platonic, but somehow Siyeon fell for her.

"We'll solve this okay?" Sooyeon said. Bora nodded and pulled her closer by her waist for a kiss.

--

Hearing the dorm door open, Yoohyeon ran out of her room but frowned upon seeing the person.

"You expected Siyeon right?" Bora looked up and put her shoes aside.

"You know where she is?" Yoohyeon asked with hope in her voice.

"No. I... haven't seen her since she left the studio." Bora thought that the best thing would be to just play dumb for now. She had to talk to Siyeon first.

"Oh... She's not answering my texts and I'm kinda getting worried."

Both girls went to their rooms and Bora sat on her bed. She exhaled louder than she intended. It almost sounded like a groan which took Yoohyeon by surprise.

"It's not the first time she disappears, she's probably out and about doing something..." Bora looked away knowing she was just talking crap at this point. The way Siyeon ran out and those text messages showed she was not fine. She was hurting somewhere and there was no way of contacting her. They would have to wait until she would come back on her own.

--

Without making a sound, Siyeon tried to be extra quiet when she opened the door to their dorm. It was late at night and most members were probably asleep. She didn't want to wake them up but also didn't want to get unnecessary attention for her disappearance.

She turned around to carefully close the door and cursed quietly when there was a little creek. She turned around to start walking when a hand pressed hard on preventing her from screaming, but still making her jump.

"Can we talk?"

Siyeon's wide eyes stared at Bora and she just slowly nodded. Bora dropped her hand and they went outside.

--

Sitting down on a bench nearby, the two girls stared into the streets and buried their hands further into their jackets as the night was getting colder. Cars were passing by and not many people were outside. A street lamp near the bench was flickering every few seconds making the atmosphere even more unsettling.

"We'll probably freeze here..." Bora started the small talk and Siyeon hummed and didn't look up.

Bora sighed. "Siyeon... I know."

The younger girl looked over to see Bora holding her phone.

"You got a text from Yooh and it caught my eye and... I kinda went through your texts..."

Siyeon snatched her phone away from Bora making her flinch.

"What the , Bora?! That's an invasion of privacy." She sighed and leaned back on the bench. She was too scared to admit her feelings, but this had to be the worst way for Bora to find out.

"I'm sorry, okay... I couldn't control myself; I saw my name in the text and just had to know. I didn't expect you... Well, you know..." Bora bit her lip and watched Siyeon's expression remain the same.

"What? That I like you? That I'm probably in love with you? That I've been scared to admit it for years? That I didn't want to ruin everything? That I cried myself to sleep so many nights because you weren't mine? That I died each time you mentioned Sooyeon? That my heart completely broke when I saw you kiss today?"

Siyeon sighed and closed her eyes. There were no tears left. She left them all in that neighborhood. People living there would probably think it rained in the afternoon.

She looked over at Bora who didn't know what to say to all of that.

"You know, some days were so great... I actually thought I have a chance with you..." A chuckle left Siyeon's mouth as she shook her head. She didn't find any of this amusing. The hole in her chest was too big and she felt tired of it all. She just wanted to forget all of it. She wanted to forget she even liked Bora in the first place.

"Siyeon, I don't know what to say... I'm sorry you had to see us like that. I love you with all my heart, really, but-"

"...but not in that way." Siyeon finished the sentence for her. She gave Bora a small smile that was filled with sadness. The guilt building up in Bora's stomach was slowly eating her alive. Siyeon broke eye contact and stared into the distance.

"I can't come back." She began. "I don't think I can look at you two together and not feel a thing. I need some time. I'll tell the manager I'm sick or something..."

"I'm really sorry Siyeon... I hope one day, you and I can be back to normal."

The flickering of the street lamp stopped completely. They let that sentence dissolve into the newly formed darkness that surrounded them.

"I hope so too."