I was so thankful Tae-Goo had to leave after our talk, giving me peace of mind which I actually never had because of what just happened. I was just telling myself yesterday that relationship with Tae-Goo is off my track but it seems like my mind is going the oposite way. Aigoo, Mi-Na what a weakling you are, with just a kiss from Tae-Goo you already forgot about your reasons.

I woke up early the next day which is unusual. I opened my eyes, staring at the white ceiling. I might look calm but my mind is completely in turmoil of seeing Tae-Goo today. I was nervous, something I never felt before just because of seeing someone. I've talked in front of a lot of people in conferences, dealt with various patients and their family but never felt like this.

I felt a great relief upon hearing there were other people in the dining table, I'm not sure if I can face Tae-Goo alone today. I wonder why I feel nervous while he seems just fine. Could it be because he wasn't serious with what he said yesterday? I regretted spending all my time in studies, I should have dated even once just to be familiar with this kind of feeling.

'Good morning.' I greeted everyone, well except Tae-Goo who was already watching me. I pulled a chair and deliberately took my time looking at each food in the table as if they are an art work.

'Do you want to come with me to the library noona? You mentioned last time you want to visit the library here.'

I looked at Hyun-Ho, smiling at him.

'We're going out today Hyun-Ho.' Tae-Goo cut him off.

Hyun-Ho looked at Tae-Goo. I also turned to him surprised at what he said. Our eyes met, so I quickly move my eyes to the glass of water in front of me and drank from it.

Hyun-Ho cleared his throat, awkwardly laughing after.

'We were not able to go to El Escorial the other day, we'll go there today.'

I saw hyung's grim expression while looking at me intently. I wonder if he's thinking that this is one of my strategy.

'Is that what you want Mi-Na?'

'Ahm..sure, that's fine with me oppa.' I turned to Tae-Goo, smiling. 'It looks like the weather today is good as well.'

'I promised you that I'll bring you there since we missed the football game. I don't want to break my promise again Mi-Na.' he winked at me after making me glare at him.

Omo, how could he do that in front of hyung and Hyun-Ho?

Hyun-Ho's laugh made me turned to him. He probably find Tae-Goo's behaviour unusual. I turned to hyung and he was still watching me.

'Fine hyung. You can have noona for today.'

'Not just today Hyun-Ho. If you need Mi-Na for something, let me know first okay?'

'Oppa!' I called out to Tae-Goo, not liking how he sounded.

'What? I'm just saying Mi-Na, you need to maximize your time here. You'll go back to Korea at the end of the month.'

Hyung's forehead creased. 'And I heard from master that you are planning to return to Korea as well Tae.'

Is that true? I know he can't go back to Korea yet, the triad group is looking for him. Going back to Korea can possibly cause his freedom and even his life. Once he step his foot in Korea they will hunt him and jail him.

'You know what will happen Tae once you return there. You are risking your life if you go back to Korea.'

I played with glass worried that Tae-Goo will see through me that I know all about these.

'I don't know hyung, I feel like I should start fixing my life and that's the first thing I need to settle.'

Hyung look at me while slowly chewing his food. I turned to Tae-Goo who was looking afar. Is this what he really wants to do?

Clutching my sling bag, I went out of the car. From afar I could already see the vast monastery. It has four principal stories with large towers at each corner that is worth gushing about.

'You don't have to - '

I cleared my throat and turn to the garden. The wind blowing against him as he opens the umbrella halted me from talking. I took a deep breath to recover.

'-bring umbrella.'

Slow down my heart, I told myself as I watch Tae-Goo walk towards me, making that short distance a runway for him. I'm starting to regret going out with him this day. It looks like the tower I built around myself is about to crumble if he continue being cool like this.

He smiled at me as soon he is in my front. I want to remove his sunglasses knowing his eyes are smiling as well but also afraid how intense it could be at times. I turned to the bridge heading to the monastery. I held my breath when I felt his arms brushing mine as we walk.

'Are you okay?'

I almost jump when he touch my back. Please let me enjoy this day without being so conscious of him, I silently prayed.

'You were silent on our way here. Are you still mad at me?'

'Ani. It's just..-'

'The kiss?' he asked in a teasing voice.

'Ya!' I stop walking and frowned at him. 'How could you talk about that?!' I covered my face, embarassed and walked ahead of him. His laughter followed me making me irritated.

'Miyanhe..miyanhe!'

He run after me but I can still hear a hint of teasing in him. 'I won't tease you anymore, promise.' His hand rested on my shoulder making me walk slower. 'Aigoo, you're all red now. Let's enjoy today ah?'

I hope that's possible even if he's that close to me. After a while he sighed while we continue to walk to the interior of basilica.

Out at the courtyard of the kings, I peer through the arch column amazed at the number of sculptures. I wonder how the queen felt living in this huge place. A day is not even enough to go through the entire monastery.

I nudge at Tae-Goo who was reading the writings of one of the king's sculpture. 'Did you understand it?' It was written in Spanish.

'Hardly.' He giggled. I noticed that he is often smiling and laughing, I wonder if he noticed that himself. I didn't noticed I pinched his cheek when he grasped my hand. 

'Oh?'

'Weh?' there goes his smile again and his languid eyes staring back at me.

I shook my head smiling back at him. I tried to pull my hand but he didn't let go so I just let him hold it. His hand feel warmth and soft, the hold wasn't tight but was something you don't want to let go.

'I love this garden.'

I agree with him. The vast garden can look tiring with the long walk but it actually soothes your mind.

'When my mother died, I was alone most of the days. I remember spending time in her garden at our backyard while ahjumma look after me.' He was telling me those while looking afar. 'While growing up solitude was my constant companion. I was surrounded by a lot of people, my father's men, our household help but no one really paid attention to me. I wasn't really looking for the attention..'

It felt like my heart was being pinch with what he was saying. I try to find words to say to comfort him but nothing came out. He needed those words in the past but no one was there to say it to him. I wanted to smile at him but a lump in throat couldn't make me. Tae-Goo looks tough but he actually have a fragile heart. He was lonely but doesn't want to burden anyone of his pain.

I held on to his hand tighter, wishing I was with him during those times. I felt bad for judging him from the beginning, for being creeped out on his behaviour. It must be the isolation that was crushing him. All of us go through our own lovel of lonelliness, but only few seems to understand.

I pulled his hand halting us. 'Thank you oppa for living.' I put my arms around his waist, embracing him tight. I'm glad he didn't think about ending his life despite the tragic event he'd been through. HIs embrace was tighter, it was becoming hard to breath but I hold on to it knowing he needed it. I hit his back when he was still holding me quite long.

'Ya, let me go! You're abusing me now oppa!'

'Ani. I'm just trying to take this opportunity while you're being nice.' he said in a playful tone.

I pushed him a little, pulling back so I can look at him. 'Tss, I'm always nice to you Tae oppa!'

His hands moved on my shoulder as he looked at me intently. I felt embarassed and at the same nervousness. I didn't even thought of what I'll wore today and I only put on lipstick. I'm sure Tae-Goo had seen far beautiful ladies. Tae Goo tucked the loose hair behind my ears slowly and it made me want to lean my face on it.

'You know I like you Mi-Na but I know you've known far better guys than me. Kinder, have better jobs that you can be proud of. I have a lot of things to be ashamed, in time when I have the courage to tell you about it, I will. I'm saying this because I know you're not the type of person to judge, you have been very caring, understanding and accepting of me.'

He embraced me again. I felt his hands slowly smoothing my hair. The softness of his voice and hand didn't calm the way my heart was beating badly and I feel so embarassed by what I am feeling right now.

'I even don't care if you return my feelings but I'll let you know mine and I'll let you see how important you are to me. I don't care about our differences, it doesn't change the fact that I like you. If you go back to Korea, I'll follow you there.'

I'm so tempted to agree with him and start living in that small bubble that he wants to create. I wonder how it seems so easy for him and I envy him for that. I'm afraid that if he said more I'll jump on him and kiss him deeper than he did before.

I'm so overwhelmed with emotions right now that any thoughts have flew from my mind. I shook my head wanting to gather my thoughts. My movement made him look at me. I regretted looking at him cause he was so serious. How did that two months change so much for him? His hypnotic eyes bore into me looking into the depth as if he'll find something in there.

'No? Are you rejecting me?' he said coldly. 

I removed his arm around me and took a step backward. His eyes followed my every move as if he's afraid that I'll leave him here.

'What? Why?'

I thought he'll get mad with the way he was frowning but he was calm but really calculating. It probably took all his will to stop himself from raging.

'You said it oppa, we still have a lot to know about each other.'

'Yes but I also said it doesn't matter cause you're not the kind of person to judge someone.' He said seriously. 'Do you have someone else back in Korea?'

'Why are you asking me that? You probably hired a detective to know everything about me.' I realized there's nothing really I can hide from him.

'Why would I do that? I trust you Mi-Na!'

'Don't trust me oppa.' I gave him my sad smile and turned away from him. I can't stand looking at him while I''m hiding a lot of things from him. I almost bump into him when he stood infront of me with that angered face. His face almost red and veins along his neck visible, I turned to his arms and saw the same. I palmed his cheeks softly hoping he'll just calm down. I don't want to cause a scene in here though we are far from the crowd but who knows what would Tae Goo. It makes me wonder more once he discovered why I'm living with them at the moment.

'Calm down oppa.'

'I am calm Mi-Na!' he was gritting his teeth.

I almost giggled with what he said because he was really far from it. My thumb smoothens his cheek, I watch him with a smile. 'You just said earlier that you don't care if I return my feelings for you..'

He frowned more realizing I throw what he said back at him. 'Why won't you like me?'

My heart cleanched hearing that begging voice which was so unlike him. I feel bad realizing this power I have in him. I shook my head again letting out a soft sigh.

'Oppa..' I held on to his arms 'I like you..I really do but - '

I was not able to finish when he lean towards me and planted a deep kiss on my lips. I felt his hands s around me, pulling me from my back towards him. I gasped for air but he took it as a chance to flick his tongue inside my mouth causing my heart to pound harder. I didn't realized my hand was grasping the front of his shirt until he pulled and spoke.

'No buts Mi-Na, the only thing that matter is we like each other. Let's settle your doubts together.'

I slowly opened my eyes and pushed him but his hand on my back was tight, not letting me go. It looks like he also have power on me - I can't say no to him.