'Dr Yoo!' a man from outside my room called.

I looked up from the book I'm reading and turned to the alarm clock in my bedside table. It's already late, what does he need? I was trying to make myself sleep by reading, but it looks like sleep is still far from me.

'Dr Yoo, boss is throwing a fit. We can't stop him.' The bodyguard was catching his breath as he speak. 'Please, maybe you can do something about it. He will be more violent later if he's not stop immediately.'

'What happened?' I looked at his suit that is creased and ed, his hair was dishelved. Basing on Tae-Goo's medical records I requested from his physician in Korea, he has the tendency to be violent. I asked for a pen and paper to write a prescription for a sedative just in case he's really uncontrollable.

I followed the shouts and the sound of crashing of glasses. My heart was pounding hard because of nervousness as the noise becomes louder. It is my first time to handle a case like this with an adult patient. With his built, he is definitely stronger than me.

Tae-Goo pinned me with a hard look as soon I entered the already opened office. His hand fisted, his shoulders moves with his heavy breathing. The bodyguards stood in the four corners and couldn't come near him. I saw how they wanted to speak to tell me what happened but they can't.

I took a deep breath as I continued to take a step inside the room, trying to go near him. 'Tae-Goo-ssi..' I called softly.

'Get out!' He shouted, throwing a lampshade in the floor.

I didn't speak but remained in my place observing him. He's a mess. His wet hair is disheleved, his black shirt is creased and his chin is bleeding. Before I could take a further step, one of the body guard jump on Tae-Goo causing them to fall in the floor.

'Let me go! Let me go!' Tae-Goo shouted.

He tried to kick and punch the bodyguard who was holding him. A fist landed on the bodyguard's cheeks.

'Tae-Goo-ssi, please calm down.' I called out to him.

His medical record doesn't have enough information about Tae-Goo's condition. The finding seems to be based on the observation and that there were really no close interaction and talk between the physocologist and Tae-Goo. Aigoo, this is like groping in the dark.

'Get away from me. I'm going to kill you as soon as I got a hold of you!' Tae-Goo continued shouting. Another bodyguard was able to get a hold of Tae-Goo and was about to punch him.

'No, don't hurt him.' I shouted.

'Dr Yoo, he'll do worst if we don't stop him now. You saw what he just did to us' One bodyguard pleaded.

I walked towards them not removing my eyes from Tae-Goo who was lying down flat on the floor. His hands are held tightly by the bodyguard seating at his back. The bodyguard who went to my room earlier arrived and gave the sedative to me. I took the sedative from him and kneel down beside Tae-Good giving him a shot before he can protest. Tae-Goo slowly calmed down, his eyelids dropping. I don't usually gave sedative to patients unless they are being violent. Depending on the patient sedatives can be highly addictive.

I heared the bodyguards sigh as soon as Tae-Goo calmed down. I instructed them to put Tae-Goo in his bed and requested for ahjumma to assist me. When ahjumma grips the bottom of Tae-Goo's shirt, I close my eyes. I don't know why, I feel like it's I should not see his body. Right, I'm a doctor and I have seen a lot of chest and body even more but I feel like his body is not something I'm supposed to see.

Ahjumma cleared . 'Dr Yoo..'

I blinked several times while I contentrate on looking at ahjumma's face never looking down.

'- you need to push his body sideways so we can lift his shirt.'

Aigoo..this is embarassing, my face probably look like a tomato now hearing teasing in ahjumma's voice. I swallowed in my throat when I carefully pushed Tae-Goo's body sideways. My hands are almost shaking as soon as I touch Tae-Goo's skin. Blood is rushing through my veins so fast that I feel like it's the only think I can hear roaring inside me. I take a deep breath, scolding myself for feeling this way. I turned his other side, his body facing mine. As soon as his shirt was discarded, his abs flashed. The man has abs and yes, six packs! It wasn't obvious, he has always worn loose shirt or longsleeve. My eyes can't seem to look away from the hard chest moving up and down with his breathing.

'I'll just get the medicine kit.'

'Ahju -..' before I could even protest ahjumma is already out of the room. I took the wet towel sulking, I guess I don't have a choice. Miyanhe Tae-Goo-ssi I didn't mean to see you like this, please don't think I'm violating you, I whispered while I wipe his forehead. I stared at his face. He looked peaceful, very far from what I've seen from him the previous days. Everytime I see him, he is always scowling as if he's always pissed. He will laugh but it sends chills.

I didn't noticed my hand stilled while I was holding his hand and my the other wipe his arms, I was still staring at his face. This guy seems to be cut for perfection. He look handsome in all his angles, how could that be possible? His thick eyebrows, his pointed nose, his cheekbones and his pinkish-purple-ish lips. I wonder what led him to this illness. Mental illness is not really obvious, even some of the famous people have it without being noticed and would only be known until they breakdown.

My heart breaks knowing a lot of great things he misses in life with his illness. Fighting Tae-Goo-ssi, don't loose hope, one day you'll become productive again have a fulfilling life. I cheered for him silently. I feel bad that at first my goal for treating him was to get my brother but now seeing him like this, I really wanted to help him get well and be a better person. This is possible for him, his family is rich they have all the means to treat his mental condition. He deserves all the happiness in life, like everyone does. Somehow, I realized life has been good to me, my parents are well, we are healthy and now I found my brother.

I almost gasped in surprise when I heard ahjumma's voice. I immediately continued wiping his arm without realizing it was a little forceful. He slightly frowned and groaned that I almost let go of his hand.

'I'll do it Dr Yoo.' ahjumma said in a low voice.

I suddenly feel nervous, my lips as if I was caught doing a crime.

'It's okay ahjumma, you can rest now. I'll stay here and watch him. I'm not sure what will happens once he's awake.'

'Okay. The guards are outside his room, just call them if you need anything.'

'Thank you. Good night ahjumma.'

A mumbling and tight hold in my arm woke up my senses.

'Omma..omma..OMMA!' a mumbling that eventually turned into a shout had me shooting from my seat. My eyes quickly scan the room and met Kook-Hwan's eyes.  I nodded to him, telling him it's okay. I wiped the sweat in his forehead with my hands and noticed his unusual temperature. I moved it to his neck and confirmed he has fever. His hand on my arm tightened, he was shaking his head as he continue to mumble. His pain, fear and struggle are etched in the crease of his forehead, I will not wonder if anytime he'll cry.

'Ssshhhh...it's okay, I'm here..' I whispered to him as I smoothen his arm, patting it softly in between.

'Omma, why did you leave me?' I stilled when he turned to me on his side, pulling me towards him. His face almost buried in my stomach.

A lump form on my throat feeling his loneliness. Ignoring the tears that fell from my eyes, my hand moved to smoothen his back. 'It's alright Tae-Goo, I'm here. You don't have to be sad..' I continued to cooed in my breaking voice.

I can't stop my tears as I continue to hear him call our for his mother. Now I began to understand where his pain is coming from. I can't imagine living a life without a mother. It would be really tough. It will be easy to say 'just be strong' 'it's because he choose to be that way' but that's not the way it is. Some can cope but some can't, the only thing we can give is understanding instead of judging.

I tried to peel his arms from my waist but he just tightened his hold. My legs are beginning to hurt from standing and my arms from soothing his back but he just won't let go. I decided to climb on his bed and got a groan from him. He probably thought I'm leaving. As soon as I lay beside him, he snuggled in my neck, his arms around my waist and he continued to whisper 'omma.' I placed my arm under his neck and smoothed his back. I felt him relax as if my hands are his mother's. I remember my omma scratching my back while singing a song for me until I feel asleep. Was it the same thing for him? Did his omma scratched his back too to make him sleep when he was a little boy? My other hand went to his hair, combing it. I pulled the sheets to cover him feeling him chill.

Miyanhe Tae-Goo, life has been hard for you.