Jinki had never even seen Lord Jonghyun’s manor before.  Never in his life having any need or reason to go. The fields and pastures were lush as the hard packed trail wound through them, leading towards a great stone manor the bustled with people and activity and was surrounded by carefully manicured greenery.  It was intimidating to say the least.  

     He roused up the last of his courage, he’d already come this far after all, and headed to the stables to drop off his horse.  Before he quite realized it, he found himself at the front door, a rather confused looking maid escorting him into the sitting room to wait for Lord Jonghyun.  He felt so out of place here; the walls were adorned with fine tapestries and each piece of furniture looked far too expensive and delicate to actually sit upon.  He stood awkwardly, praying his boots hadn’t tracked any mud on the beautiful carpet when he was startled by Lord Jonghyun clearing his throat rather obviously. He looked up to see that dreaded smirk directed right at him.

     “Lee Jinki.  My, my… it has been quite some time, has it not?” Jonghyun asked, leaning casually against the door frame looking completely at ease.  

     “Lord Jonghyun,” Jinki said, his head dipped in a polite bow but his heart seemed to tightening in his chest.  Knowing their marriage was a ruse didn’t ease any of the pain of knowing the woman he was still desperately in love with was married to the man before him.  The years hadn’t affected the lord, he was still as handsome and confident as he always had.

     “Whatever do I owe the pleasure of your visit?” Jonghyun asked.

     What could he even say?  Why was he here? What did he hope would come of this meeting?  His lack of response only made Lord Jonghyun laugh.

     “Ay, I will not torture you so.  You are here to see my wife I take it?” Jonghyun asked, no hint of jealousy or annoyance.  “Let us talk first,” he said, gesturing for Jinki to take a seat. Jinki followed suit. Jonghyun poured them both a glass of brandy before sitting down across from him.  He hadn’t really thought about how this would happen, what he would say. He’d been so focused on seeing Gwiboon again that everything else felt inconsequential. “Jinki… it has been three years.  Three very long years. I am delighted to see that you have returned to the city but only of this isn’t merely a visit,” Jonghyun said, the glass twirling in his hand. The playfulness was gone from his eyes as he pinned Jinki was a hard stare. 

     “I… I’m not sure I understand what you mean,” Jinki said.

     “Gwiboon and I have been honestly with each other since before we wed.  She is a dear friend to me and it pains me to see her unhappy. And she has been unhappy these past 3 years.  When you left… Gwiboon did not handle it well. She’s come back into herself since and I don’t want to risk her health by seeing you again only for you to vanish.  So why are you here? What is it you want?”

     “I... “ Jinki paused.  What could he even say?  He had no defense. He’d left, he’d left for 3 years.  “I knew it was best for me to leave, it was the right thing, the only thing.  But I’ve regretted my decision every single second of every single day since,” he met Jonghyun’s eyes, his words raw with honesty.  

     “So does that mean you are here to stay?” Jonghyun asked.

     “I am here to do whatever Gwiboon would wish of me.  If she never wants to see me again, I shall leave. If she wishes me to stay, I shall stay,” Jinki answered.  What else could be promise?

     Jonghyun studied him for a long moment before he picked up a bell on the end table and gave it a single sharp pull and a maid materialized in the room, “Go fetch Lady Kim.  We have a visitor.” He ordered.

     The maid scampered off, leaving the two men alone, “I’m glad you returned, Jinki.  I only wish you had done it sooner,” Jonghyun said, taking a long drink of his brandy.  

     Jinki puzzled over his words but his stomach was tied up in knots at the thought of seeing Gwiboon once again that he couldn’t give Jonghyun’s words much thought.

     “Jonghyun darling, you called?” Gwiboon’s voice rang out from the next room.  Jinki’s breath hitched in his throat, every nerve in his body stiffening at the sound of her voice.   “Jonghyun! I was talki--” her words cut off at the sight of Jinki, “oh.”

     Jinki felt frozen, like he was stuck in this moment that lasted for eternity.  The years had been good to Gwiboon. She had filled out, her figure no longer so thin and fragile looking but full of curves that were only accentuated by the tight, low cut dress that was, no doubt, the latest fashion.  

     “My dear, I said we have a guest,” Jonghyun said, his smile gentle and knowing.  He watched the two of them, studying their reactions and movements as if their reunion was his entertainment for the evening.

     “Jinki,” she breathed out, the shock clear on her face.  She froze where she stood her eyes never leaving his.

     “M’lady, I apologize for coming unannounced.  It was rude of me,” Jinki said softly, drinking in the sight of her.  His memories paled in comparison to the reality. Gwiboon had a way of filling up a room, her presence was overpowering and Jinki was drowning in it.  His heart pounded painfully, all those unresolved feelings he’d pushed aside came rushing back. It didn’t matter how long he’d been away, it didn’t matter what had happened over the past three years.  His heart still only beat for her and for the first time in those three years he felt fully alive again.

     Gwiboon seemed to hesitate, glancing over at Jonghyun.  “What are you doing here, Jinki?” 

     Jinki sighed, aching to embrace her, to reassure her, to comfort her.  “I have done my best to stay away but I… I had to know if you are doing well.  I’ll leave--.” 

     Gwiboon’s face hardened and she cut in before he could finish.  “I see nothing has changed. You will continue to try to make decisions on my behalf, for my own good?  At what point will you ask me what I want? At what point will you allow me to make decisions for myself?  I am a grown woman, Jinki.” She turned to Jonghyun, “Can you believe the audacity? He shows up to our home uninvited and unannounced only to offer the same pointless arguments he made three years ago.” 

     Jonghyun smiled, “Shall I have him escorted out, my dear?  Flogged in the square? Exiled for daring to abandon his love once again?” 

     Gwiboon rolled her eyes, a smile threatened to break through at the corners of .

     Jinki’s didn’t know how to interpret their interaction.  There was an easy, comfortable relationship between them that stabbed deep in Jinki’s chest.  He’d always hoped she’d find comfort and happiness within her marriage but he’d never realized how deeply it would wound him to see her happy with another.  “I-- you are right, m’lady. I made the decision for us both and,” his lips quirked into a smile, “I wouldn’t dare speak for m’lady, but I have suffered greatly for that decision.”

     “So… what are you offering?” She asked, a challenge in her tone.

     “I am merely here because I couldn’t keep myself away any longer,” Jinki answered.  “I will do whatever you ask of me.” 

     “If I tell you to leave and never return?” She asked.

     “Then with great difficulty, I shall,” Jinki promised.

     “And if I tell you to never again do something as stupid as to leave my side?”

     Jinki’s heart jumped in his chest, “Then, m’lady, I shall stay.”

     Rather than responding, Gwiboon took a few hesitant steps towards him before throwing her arms around his neck, clinging to him.  Jinki pulled her tight. Despite the years, she felt right in his arms, like she belonged there and he wanted the moment to last forever.

     Jinki relaxed a bit, a small smile pulling at his lips.  As he indulged himself, his arms holding her close. “I’m so sorry,” He whispered against her cheek.  

     “Lee Jinki.  I don’t think I shall ever forgive you,” the words muffled against his neck.

     “As you shouldn’t, but I shall work everyday to make up for it,” he answered. 

     “Idiot,” She muttered.

     “Jinki,” Jonghyun called, his expression remaining amused despite the position they were in, “I assume you will be staying for dinner?”

     Jinki looked down at Gwiboon for confirmation.  “Of course! Sir Minho is coming as well,” She said, pulling back to look up at Jinki but refusing to release her hold on him.

     Jinki looked between the two of them, stunned.  His ears by be deceiving him because this simple couldn’t be real.  Her words suggesting an idea he had never even let himself dream. If Sir Minho was still a part of their lives… 

     “Our stablemaster is getting on in age, perhaps we can discuss a position for Jinki,” Jonghyun said. 

     “Our stablemaster is barely 40 years of age,” Gwiboon laughed.  

     “Yes, decrepit.  He must start training his replacement immediately,” Jonghyun smiled.

     “I-- is that what you wish?” Jinki asked, looking between Gwiboon and Jonghyun.  He had imagined this reunion so many times during their time apart but even in his wildest fantasies he’d never imagined an outcome such as this.  

     “Jinki, Gwiboon is my wife but more than that, she’s my best friend.  She has given me more than I deserve and far more than I ever dreamed of hoping for.  She has given me a family and freedom. She has protected me and accepted me and for that I am forever grateful.  I wish her nothing but happiness and the same freedom she has granted me. So please, stay for dinner,” Jonghyun explained, his words were honest and pure and it made Jinki feel just a tad guilty for hating the man for so long.

     “I feel I am dreaming,” Jinki whispered, his lips pressing gently against her temple.

     “Ay,” She responded.

     “M’lady, would you like to go for a ride with me?” Jinki asked.  Everything he never dared hope for was coming true. All he wanted was to recreate their years lost, to pick up where they left off and start over with less fear and more trust.

     “Yes!  Yes she would,” Jonghyun interjected quickly.

     “Oh hush, you!” She snapped at him but the smile didn’t leave her face. 

     “What?  Have I spoken wrong?  You have been pining for far too long to say no to the man now!  Besides, your mother has been writing near daily asking when we are to have another.  Please, please go for a ride together.  I do not want to have to lie to our parents and tell them you are barren,” Jonghyun said, his smile sly as he shot a pointed look at Jinki.

     “Kim Jonghyun!” Gwiboon scolded, only to be met with his rather raucous laughter in return.   

     Jinki’s cheeks turned the most vivid shade of red, beyond embarrassed at what Lord Jonghyun was so casually suggesting before he gasped in surprise, “What do you mean, another?”

     “Ay, another,” Jonghyun responded and the smile on his face widened.

     “Jonghyun, would you go get Jinwoon,” Gwiboon requested, her dark eyes never looking away from Jinki.

     “Jinwoon,” Jinki breathed.  Gwiboon had a son. A child.  So much had changed, so much had happened in his absence.  He’d agonized over every possible outcome during their time apart but he’d never allowed himself to consider such a turn of events.  

     “He looks just like you,” She whispered, a gentle, happy smile upon her face.

     “You mean--”

     “Are you daft?” She laughed.  “Did you forget my husband’s preferences?  Did you forget our last night together?” 

     “I--” Jinki stuttered rather stupidly, his brain having trouble processing.  Suddenly, it was like a dam broke and his emotions flooded his system, all the years of longing, of hurt were coming to an end and on top of that, this new joy of finding out he had a child with the woman he held so dearly.  It was too much all at once. Jinki grabbed her roughly, crushing her to his chest, lips starved for hers after all these years. She gasped at the suddenness of his attack before giggling against his lips, her fingers getting lost in his hair as she kissed him back with all the passion she could muster.

     “I have a son?” Jinki whispered, the smile on his face only growing wider with each passing second.  Gwiboon nodded, her own smile just as bright. “I have a son!” Jinki all but yelled, picking her up by the waist, swinging her in a circle before crushing her to his chest once again. 

     Her laughter was like music to his ears. “You will scare the maids with your yelling,” she teased.  

     “I-- I never thought…” Jinki couldn’t even put into words his feelings at such news.  He’s suffered for so long, worrying over Gwiboon’s livelihood and happiness and keeping himself away for her own good.  If only he’d known just how happy they could be.

     “I’m so glad you came back,” she said.  

     “I’m so sorry it took me so long to return to you.  I desperately wished you would find happiness and still selfishly held onto the hope that you desired me, waited for me,” he told her.  “If I had known that such a future was possible for us, I never would have left.” The only thing he desired more than having her as his own, was her happiness and security.  In his naive mind, he had never considered a possibility where they could have all of those things and more.

     Gwiboon smiled fondly at him, “Why is it, every time we meet you are apologizing for something?”

     Jinki let out a low chuckle, “tis a habit I suppose.”

There will be an epilogue for this but it is not written yet so it will not be posted for awhile
But until then, thank you for reading!
I wrote this story a very long time ago and despite all it's flaws, it will always hold a special place in my heart
so i hope you all enjoyed it as well

Special shout out to Suzan5, Hyuuga_Heibe, lacus_clyne and wishful_thinking99 for you constant support and encouragement!