Excerpt from the first chapter of the Culture shock 2:blended 

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Pregnancy feels like the devil shoved his whole fist up my , pulled out my molars and then on his way out played hacky sack with my intestines just for funzies and then punched out of my and tapped it for good luck. And oh my god! I’m always hungry, which is not surprising, I am ting all day! “Joy!”

I jumped, my whole body vibrating like I just did a line of coke, “Joy, I have been calling you”, Wendy complained. Why is she yelling? Does she not love me anymore? “Joy, wait. Baby, don’t cry.”

She hates me! Don’t worry baby girl, we don’t need her, we can survive on our own. I rubbed my belly ready to pack my up and leave Wendy’s screaming in the dust when I turned to Wendy fuming. “How dare you yell at your pregnant wife! Married for four months and already your true colors are showing! Domestic Violence is on the rise Wendy! I will not be a statistic!” I yelled, grabbing my suitcase and storming out.

I got halfway to the door when Wendy grabbed my elbow, why is her skin always so soft? I turned to her huffing, yanked my arm away and immediately started to cry again. Why is her skin so ing soft! “What Wendy! Here to make your wife cry some more?”

“Joy”, she sighed, before ping my suitcase, “it’s empty”. The flap fell over uselelly, oops.