11.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Knowing that kicking the dried leaves at him would not affect on anything, I do it anyway, as a symbol of protest. Somehow I am loathing myself now, because obviously, I brought Jongdae here to talk – apologize, to be specific – regarding my past behaviour however now, only the silence conquered us. And the air is tensed enough for me to get irritated as it is filled with the words that left unuttered by any of us.

But again, Jongdae keeps gazing at me the same way, he glances like he was displeased by me stalling from initiating the conversation; at the same time he occasionally purses his lips together every time our eyes timidly met – seems like he is enjoying the sight of being in misery of arranging the words that I had to say right now. That man knows me quite enough that he could tell that I really hate to say sorry.

And for the umpteenth time in those 5 minutes of no words being spoken, Jongdae teasingly huffs, “3 minutes more and I’ll go home.”

“You can’t do that…!”

“Well, surprise. I actually could,” the guy raises his brow, unamused then claims, “In fact, I am being very generous right now.” Jongdae’s lips turn down in an approval frown, his arms crossed as he taps one of his feet on the ground continuously, watching me fidgeting – still being too hesitant to start talking. “The time ain’t going to wait for you, miss.”

I hiss, annoyed at myself, “Um, I –” Timidly, I peek in between the bangs that fall just enough to cover my eyes. Jongdae straighten his standing posture, he looks more than ready to hear what I am about to say, though the subject is already obvious.

But I guess I failed him again for taking too much time to do it, to the point that the guy sighs heavily, “You know what? I’m really tired today. Perhaps another time, you can tell me if you’re ready enough.” And just like that, a look of disenchantment flashes on that face before he pivots, turning his back against me and walks away from the playground we are currently at.

I was too flustered by seeing that side of him – he was always warm and too kind – he doesn’t even look back and for a few damn seconds, my legs froze at the same position, foolishly witnessing him leave. Finally, some force hit me and immediately surges in my legs, pushing myself forward to catch up with those departing steps. I find myself running along the empty street and as soon as his silhouette is close enough to get into my sight, those words slip out, “I’m a terrible person.”

He halts, but still the side of his that is facing me is his back. But I don’t give a damn anymore, I had to tell him everything. “You came off really great, ever since I first saw you. You smile and greet me every single day, you hang around me all the time though all I did till now was to yell and to ignore. But believe me, I considered so many time to apologize. I tried because I am, indeed, sorry for everything.”

Upon that, he turns and the gaze that he is giving me right at the moment is one of the things that I would not forget in my entire life. Those pairs of orbs are filled with amusement, warmth and mysteriously beautiful. Damn, this guy is really something else.

And so I find myself carry on for a few last words to neatly wrap it, “Again, I am a terrible person, I’m ignorant, I could be clumsy and end up being mean, my ego is high, I hurt you several times. But you must know that when I say sorry, I really mean it. I truly hope that you can forgive me.” It was crazy of how I could feel the balminess crawling on my cheeks now, even those dim lamp streets could not hide the fact that my face is flushed.

Especially when Jongdae takes a step forward with that same smile that he gives every time he is ‘fascinated’ by my antiques. That simple curve that could take anyone’s breath away, not excluding my own self.

On the next second when he is standing just a few small steps away from where I am, the guy tilts to the side, and a can of beer appears to my sight as it is being offered, “Do you want to talk over a drink?”

The corner of my lips stretched upwards by themselves as the scene of the weekend drama airing shows the female protagonist sitting alone on the swing at the male protagonist’s neighbourhood playground, my mind could not help but to reminisce what happened back then after Ga Eul’s apology – we made ourselves back to that open area and had a long, friendly conversation of a few cans of drinks. Throughout the moment, I realized that she is quite a chatterbox too, well, perhaps because of the shots.

But one behaviour that is surely hers, Ga Eul really talks like a tough boy. As if she is ready to fight anyone.

And that is her charm since day one.

“I am deeply regretting that I didn’t get to tape that apology,” I joke, relishing the way her cheeks blushed as she is getting annoyed by my endless teasing. “I knew it, you’re quite a girl in the heart, Noona.”

Her glare is unchanging, Ga Eul grits her teeth as she asks, “Do you want to see my other side that bad? I won’t mind if we go back to being enemy and restart, all over again. But there is no way I’d say sorry for the second time.”

“Enemy? I never thought we were on that level of hatred though.” I pout as I talk in a sulky tone, then slant the can for another sip. From the corner of my eyes, I notice her head immediately turns to my side soon as I commented