"I hate them." Mir sipped on his warm coffee and threw his gaze to the outside of the window, watching as people started to flood the road, starting a new day.

          "Do you really?" Jinwoon asked back, reclining in his seat as he watch carefully his friend in front of him. He saw the wall Mir was building around him against the world, including him. "Do you hate me too?" He tested.

          At that question, Mir's brown orbs flickered towards Jinwoon but only for a second before his eyes glued back to the mass of people outside the cafe. "If I hate you, I won't be here."

          "You hate them but you still stay."

          "Five years." Mir mumbled. "Only for five more years of our contract."

          "And then? What will you do then?"

          "I just have to bear with them until five years. Then, I don't have to anymore."

          Jinwoon exhaled slowly and let his eyes watched what Mir had been watching. More and more people buzzing around. "What have they done to you?"

          Mir didn't answer. He kept his silence.

          "What time are you going for your appointment?" Jinwoon tried to stray from the sensitive topic. He didn't like it when the atmosphere became heavy since Mir was always fun to hang out with.

          Of course Mir was not always happy. But he was never seem this sad. He would at least kept a small smile on his face but it seemed that the MBLAQ maknae had finally tired to keep a mask of a smiling face.

          Mir looked down at his watch. "In an hour."

          "You looked nervous."

          "I am nervous." Mir tried to smile although he knew it looked awkward.

          "Do you need me to go with you. I have time to spare. Which hospital is it again?" Jinwoon offered kindly.

          Mir rejected with a smile, this time, sincere. "Just a small clinic around. I'll be fine. I'm sure it's nothing."

          "I hope so but you have been hurting a lot these days."

          Mir, once again let his eyes glance back once at Jinwoon before staring into the cup of warm coffee in his hand. "This is nothing compared to the pain I felt here." Mir palmed one hand over his chest.

          Jinwoon paused for a bit, feeling the twinge inside his own chest for a slight second before he leaned forward, resting his arm on the table. "Cheolyong-ah. When I saw you for the first time, I love how bright and outgoing you are-"

          "I was not-."

          "You are. I can see trace of yourself in all of your, for the lack of better words, crazy acts." Jinwoon chuckled to himself. "But now, I can't see it anymore."

          "I guess I just lost it." I finally lost myself.

          "Cheolyong..."

          At the sound of his name being called so sadly, his cracking heart trembled, threatening to shatter but he held it in and dared himself to look back at Jinwoon and offered him the best smile he could plaster on his face. "I know. I'll try. Again."

          And another piece of his heart broke off.

@@@@@@@@@@@

When Mir arrived at the practice around just a few minutes after ten in the morning, the other four members of MBLAQ were diligently dancing with the guide from the choreographer.

          "Oh, Cheolyong." The choreographer, being the first one to notice Mir's presence, showed a little smile on his face. "Are you okay?" He asked tentatively, knowing where Mir had gone to this morning, gaining a questioning look from the other four pairs of eyes.

          "Yes. I'm sorry for being late." Mir bowed down politely.

          The choreographer saw the look on four members of MBLAQ as they halted their dance and only the music kept on booming beats after beats. So he clapped his hands for their attention. "So, we'll take five first. When I come back, make sure to show me better dance." He walked towards the door and clapped on Mir's shoulder twice before leaving.

          Seungho went towards the speaker and turned off the music. His eyes trailed to the youngest who constantly refused to meet any of their eyes, keeping his head low. And that bothered Seungho.

          Before Seungho or any of the other three could even say anything, Mir bowed down so low towards them, muttering an apology. "I am sorry for what I have done and said this morning. I was not being... myself." There was bitterness in those last sentence.

          Seungho cleared his throat as he looked around the room awkwardly. "It's good to hear. Just warm up to join the practice."

          Mir stood back up, nodded and went to his small corner to warm up only to have an intruder hovering over him. He lifted his eyes and was not surprised to see Cheondung there, smiling softly at him.

          "Where are you from?"

          "Meeting a friend." Mir said softly, bending down to reach his toes but couldn't. It just made him angry with himself.

          "I'll help you." Cheondung offered when he saw the struggle and put his palms over Mir's back, pushing down slowly but was surprised when Mir suddenly shot up, and the sudden movement threw him off balance, falling heavily on the floor.

          All the attention went to them.

          "Bang Cheolyong! What did you do?" Joon hissed, flashing to the fallen Cheondung's side and helped the visual maknae up, checking on the younger male for any injuries.

          "I'm okay hyung." Cheondung tried to calm Joon but it was not working as Joon already ignoring him and glaring at the maknae instead.

          "Explain."

          "I..." Mir looked past Joon towards Cheondung with guilt painted his face. He gasped when he saw blood dripped from Cheondung's hand. "H-hyung. Y-your hand."

          Cheondung looked genuinely confused and raised his hand and finally saw the cut across his palm as the blood won't stop coming out and only then the dull aching he felt before turned into sharp throbbing pain. "Oww..." He scrunched up his face in pain.

          The other three members of MBLAQ immediately crowded around the younger male and inspect the injury. "This looks deep." GO commented, taking off the small towel he had around his neck and tied it around the wound.

          "Let's go to clinic first." Seungho pulled Cheondung gently with him but not before turning to Mir with a glare. "We'll speak about this later." He spat.

          Mir watched as the four members of the group left the practice room. He felt guilt weighed his shoulder down but he really didn't do it intentionally. Although he was pretty sure, after the scene he caused this morning, his other hyungs must have thought he did it on purpose to hurt their second youngest.

          Mir sighed, taking a half step forward only to collapsed and crumbled like thousands bricks falling on the floor. He moaned at the pain shooting up his spine. The exact reason why he had stood up too sudden when Cheondung was pushing on his back and as a result, Cheondung was wounded.

          Mir curled into himself, face scrunched up in unbearable pain and tried his best not to lost his consciousness when he heard the door to the practice room opened again and rush of footsteps enclosing to his collapse body. He prayed it not to be any of his hyungs as he felt deep down, the hyungs would have call him weak and use this against him when they saw him this way. He couldn't help the negative thinking.

          "Cheolyong? Did you hurt yourself?"

          Thankfully, it was their choreographer.

          "Where are the others?" The dancer asked again as Mir felt gentle hand running down his spine.

          "Hyung." Mir managed, succeeded without causing himself more pain. "Help me. Get my bag." Mir felt the warm hand left him before rushing footsteps echoed in the room and not too later, the choreographer now crouched down in front of him with a bag in his hand. "There are pills in there."

          The choreographer did as he was told, frowning at the bottle of pills now he had in his hand. "Cheolyong..." He stopped himself from asking when Mir let out a small cry of pain. "He took a bottle of mineral water in the bag and helped to maneuver Mir into his laps, with so much difficulty with Mir writhing in pain and popped two pills into the MBLAQ rapper mouth.

          It took five more minutes as they stayed in the position with Mir holding tight onto the other's hand as if it was his lifeline until Mir was sure he could move without experiencing pain as intense as before. He pulled up and sat facing the dancer, releasing the latter's hand.

          "Please don't tell anyone." Was what Mir pleaded once their eyes met properly.

          The dancer let out a sigh and looked back at Mir curiously. "You should. At least you will be given more resting time. What's wrong actually? What hurts? What did the doctor said?"

          "Nothing. Nothing hurts. I'm just tired." Mir denied the obvious and gaining him that-is-bull-look from the dancer. "It's okay hyung. I'm okay. I can handle this."

          "From what I saw, I don't think you can. And what with these pills anyway?"  

          "It's just painkillers." Mir mumbled, taking the pills back and shoved it into his backpack. "Don't worry. I have prescription for it."

          "What is the problem then?"

          "Nothing to worry. It's just something simple."

          The choreographer sighed knowing his questions would lead him nowhere and it was not exactly his place to pry. "Just promise me you won't do anything that will harm your health."

          "I will try." Mir muttered, looking away.