CHAPTER 15

Yongsun admits that Eric and her should've been more careful. The day hasn't even passed yet and there were already articles about them that they were allegedly dating. It's silly, if Yongsun would think about it, but she knows how it looked like in the eye of outsiders. Anyone who would see the picture of them hugging in a secluded coffee shop might spark an idea, especially on those who wanted something to gossip about, that they're indeed hiding something; like a relationship.

But the funny thing is that Yongsun can't seem to care anymore.

A few days back, maybe she would already have a panic attack by now, because even though some people love her and Eric together because of the show they did, the news of them dating will always, always have a negative effect on both of them. She has seen a lot of idols' careers being ruined simply because they chose to act on their feelings. She never like the way some people think 'idols' aren't supposed to have feelings, that their sole purpose was to entertain their fans and that's it, but that's the way things are. That's the reality that they live in.

But Yongsun now realizes, that it doesn't matter.

She realizes now that however the general public might take it, her personal life shouldn't compromise for it. She shouldn't let her fear get the best of her. Otherwise, she would be losing herself in the process, and even the ones she truly care about. She learned that the hard way.

So it doesn't faze her now, and its not like Eric and her are really dating anyway. But she thinks about what Moonbyul would think about it, and she laughs at herself because how dare she assume that Moonbyul even cares? They aren't together anymore, and it how many times she have to remind herself that every single day.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard her phone go off. She looks at the caller ID and to find out that its her mom. She sighs, knowing that this would be about the article that their manager just showed her.

"Mom." she greets timidly.

"Is it true?" her mother asks, the excitement in her mother's voice almost breaks Yongsun's heart knowing that she would have to disappoint them yet again with her answer.

"Eric and I are just friends, Mom." Yongsun states begrudgingly, her manager who was in the room with her knew better, and left the room to give her some privacy. She thankfully smiles at the woman.

"But you seem close in the picture, are you finally coming to your senses?" Her mother asks, and Yongsun knows it isn't  just about her and Eric anymore. This is about her and men in general.

"I'm not interested in him in that way, Mom." Yongsun really didn't want to talk about it over the phone, but she has the courage now, and she's afraid that if she let another moment pass she'd never have the courage to say it to her mother again. "And I don't think I'd ever be interested in any man in that way." she admits ever so quietly.

But she knows her mother heard her, judging by the silence from the other line.

Her heart is beating so fast, dreading the possibility of hearing her mother disown her after the long silence. She wanted to end the call and just shut off the rest of the world but she wanted to be respectful. She wanted to hear what her mother has to say about her confession.

"You're just confused." Her mother finally says, and Yongsun almost wishes her mother would've just disowned her or cursed at her; at least it meant that she's finally accepting the reality of Yongsun's identity. But her mother's answer only proved that she'd rather lie to herself and deny the reality of it all. "You've been with that girl for a long time, so its only natural for you to say that now. But you'll eventually find a man who will change your mind."

Yongsun wanted to scream at her mother out of frustration, but she decided to stay calm. "That girl has a name, Mom; it's Moonbyul." she said in gritted teeth. She hates how her mother can't even say Byul's name now, as if they did not repeatedly told her how lucky she is to have a friend like Moonbyul. She remembers how her family loved Byul so much, and it hurts her how a simple confession changed that. "And believe me, no one's ever going to convin