Thirty Five

It's Not Fine

Double update! (read chapter 34 first if you haven't) 

 

“. You look so good.” Taeyeon mutters when she sees Tiffany’s appearance after she turns on the light.

Taeyeon rubs her eyes and frowns. “Am I too late? Anyone on a date with you would be smitten.”

 

“Why would you ask me to go?” Tiffany’s voice was slightly raised due to the alcohol in her system.

“I…” Taeyeon couldn’t find the right words.

 

“Are you sick of me? Do you not love me anymore?” Tiffany’s lips were pressed into a thin line.

“What? No!” Taeyeon hurriedly says, reaching out to hold Tiffany’s hands.

“Then why?” Tiffany backs away and Taeyeon swipes the air.

 

Taeyeon’s face fell. “Please…” Her lips quivered.

 

“I asked why, Taeyeon.” 

 

Taeyeon cringes at the sharpness of her voice.

 

“Because…” Taeyeon exhales, trying to calm her heart.

“Because I am a ing idiot, that’s why.” Taeyeon says in exasperation as tears begin falling down her cheeks. 

 

Tiffany’s face softens as she sees Taeyeon in such a distraught state. 

 

“I thought I wasn’t enough. I literally can’t be by your side, Tiffany. I can’t touch you, I can’t hold you, I can’t kiss you. I can’t do anything with us being on different continents. I thought maybe she could do everything I can’t for you. I realise now that it was stupid and I regret it. I’m sorry. I am so sorry Tiffany, I feel like I only keep letting you down. You deserve better.”

She sees a tear roll down Tiffany’s cheek.

 

“See now I made you cry.” Taeyeon frustratedly hits herself.

 

“Stop it.” Tiffany grabs Taeyeon’s arm. Taeyeon resists and tries to break free from her hold.

 

“Please stop, Tae.” More tears fell and Taeyeon lets Tiffany pull her down to the floor.

 

“Tae, the only person I would ever want is you. You’re enough for me. It that I can’t come home to you everyday but just the thought of you makes my heart feel whole.” Tiffany says between sniffles.

 

“I constantly let you down. You deserve better.” Taeyeon cries. 

 

“Tae.” Tiffany interlaces their fingers together. “You’re not weak just because you have these feelings, you’re not any less. Our situation, it’s so ing hard and I feel it too.” 

 

“Tell me Tae, am I enough for you?” She squeezes their fingers together.

 

“You are.” Taeyeon nods, “more than I could ever wish for.” 

 

“And you are the same for me too. Please believe me. You’re enough. I don’t need anyone else. I only need you.”

 

Tiffany looks at Taeyeon so earnestly, trying all her might to convey her emotions and sentiments and Taeyeon believes her. Despite her reservations and insecurities, Taeyeon finally believes that she is enough for Tiffany, she is enough for her mother, she is enough for her members, she is enough for her fans. 

Taeyeon is enough.

 

Taeyeon hugs Tiffany and they both cry, letting out all of the residual negative feelings.

 

“Please Tae, next time tell me when you’re feeling something, anything, good or bad, tell me everything. I will share your joy, I will give you a shoulder to cry on, I will alleviate your anxieties, we can talk everything out. Please don’t let yourself marinate in any unpleasant thoughts and allow your mind to gaslight you.”

Tiffany feels Taeyeon nod her head in her embrace as she lifts herself from Taeyeon’s shoulder to look into her eyes. 

 

“Promise?” She sticks out her pinky.

“I promise.” Taeyeon hooks her pinky onto Tiffany’s. “And I promise to be the same for you. I never want you to cry yourself to sleep anymore.” Taeyeon maintains eye contact with Tiffany.



 

“I swear, Sunny is our god sent guardian angel.” Taeyeon comments as they were cuddling in Tiffany’s bed, idly watching television.

“Why do you say that?”

Taeyeon relays the past day’s happenings to her, from her screwing up during practice to the part where Sunny had whacked her hard on her shoulder. 

Tiffany starts laughing.

“She was the one who came up with the idea of flying here to ‘tell you how much of a I was’.” Taeyeon raised her fingers to make quotation marks in the air.

“Well, you kinda are.”

Taeyeon pouts.

“It’s okay. I find it very endearing that you’re a . You’re my .” Tiffany grins at Taeyeon.

“Just promise me you won’t give me away ever again.” Tiffany says, half jokingly.

Taeyeon looks at Tiffany, her eyes filled with regret. 

“I’m so sorry. I will never not be sorry about it.”

Taeyeon reaches out to hold Tiffany’s hand and she nuzzles her head in Tiffany’s chest.

She breathes in Tiffany’s scent and laments her past actions. She feels extremely grateful that Tiffany has forgiven her and taken her back multiple times, even the times when they were not together yet. She takes a deep breath and brings herself up so that she was facing Tiffany.

She moves in to capture Tiffany’s lips softly and gently, trying her best to convey her emotions.

 

After a moment, a smirk forms on her lips.


She lifts herself off Tiffany, a mischievous expression on her face.

“I promise I will be a smart from now.” 

 

“I swear to god…” Tiffany chuckles as she leans in to brush her lips against Taeyeon’s again.



 

The next day, it was time for Taeyeon to leave the country. 

This time, when they left each other, there was something different in the way they felt, less sadness and pity as compared to their previous separation. After last night and everything that they have experienced with each other, Taeyeon and Tiffany felt that the connection and bonds in their relationship have strengthened. Their hearts felt whole now and there was an unspoken trust and agreement between the both of them that there will not be any conscious hurt from the other person.

 

Now, it was them against the world.

 


 

A/N: I thought since I had this chapter done Imma just share it too.

*cues teary goodbye* (for now.) (I will definitely be back hehe)

I never would have thought that I would be writing again (after like four(?) years) and for like two months straight. (The power of a taeyeon concert istg) This really brought back a lot of feelings and memories and I can't wait to write more so that I can share more too! 

Thank you all for joining me in this journey and I hope that this story at least gave you guys some form of entertainment or helped distract from a bad day.

Thank you for reading and I hope you have the best day <3

 

heres taeny running to happiness

 

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minjiminjeongs
wooo taeny

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Fire_trek 244 streak #1
Chapter 37: It’s thanksgiving where I am and I’m giving thanks to Taeny and this fic.. it was a wild ride of angst and fluff but I loved it nonetheless. Beautifully written and amazingly executed. I can’t wait until I read your other fics when I get time! Thank you author nim!
Fire_trek 244 streak #2
Chapter 36: Yeah, Taeny is back! I loved this story even though it’s almost over :( the girl seemed like a great girl, but Taeny is the real deal!
Fire_trek 244 streak #3
Chapter 35: In Sunny we trust! She’s like the coffee shop girl calling Tae a lol she had the best advice maybe Taeyeon could get Sunny and the coffee shop girl together… never mind they’d be too powerful for this world lol
Fire_trek 244 streak #4
Chapter 34: The chat is something I’d pay to be apart of. But in all honesty I’d probably be Hyoyeon to the chat and ignore it all lol.. even though I love the fluff I’m looking forward to the angst!
Fire_trek 244 streak #5
Chapter 33: Omg they kissed in public! Big girl moves they’re taking I see lol.. it was nice to see them together, even if it was for a little bit. I don’t know how they will cope without each other, maybe a surprise meeting soon?
Fire_trek 244 streak #6
Chapter 32: Another great chapter, Taeny really brighten up my day, seriously. Yes, Tiffany has grown into herself more as a woman and a person. This makes me happy
Fire_trek 244 streak #7
Chapter 31: Aww, you know I love fluff.. this was pure gold. Even though I love angst this was a good change of pace. Let them just be happy for once, right?
Fire_trek 244 streak #8
Chapter 30: That was hot 🥵 who knew Taeny had it in them? I know you were feeling apprehensive about writing this but it came out great!
Fire_trek 244 streak #9
Chapter 29: This was cute and I can’t wait for the next chapter!! here we come!
Fire_trek 244 streak #10
Chapter 28: This was sad but beautiful. Missing someone is a natural emotion for us to have, I’m glad she’s coping well with this tho. I miss the coffee shop girl tho lol