Thirty Two

It's Not Fine


Taeyeon stretches from her aeroplane seat and yawns. She bends forward to look at Zero in his dog bag on the floor. He was nuzzled into himself and sleeping. Taeyeon leans back in her seat and lazily scans her surroundings. It was dark outside and the lights in the plane were dimmed as she sees most of the passengers around her asleep. 

She stares at the blank screen in front of her and thinks about her upcoming schedules, the remaining filming with Zero and her upcoming tour which she had to practise for. She sighs softly.

“What’s on your mind?” Her mother, who was sitting beside her, asks.


Taeyeon’s mother looks at her, trying to see if she would change her mind and open up. 

“You have been working too hard, my daughter. It is moving to see your passion but I wish you will give yourself a break.” Her mother says quietly when it seemed like Taeyeon wasn’t going to say anything anytime soon.

Taeyeon shakes her head and closes her eyes before groaning.

“Do you think that this is a choice I made? I’m just a pawn, mom. A money making machine for SM.” Taeyeon rants frustratedly. 


“I am just worried for you. You don’t look so good these days.” Her mother commented, a little taken aback by her tone.

“I know, and I don’t feel good either.” Taeyeon notices her mother tensing up and softens her tone. 

“But it’s do or die with these big corporations. Remember how they kicked Sica just because she wanted to do her own thing too?” Taeyeon pinches and massages her temples.

Taeyeon’s mother frowned, disheartened as she sees her daughter’s struggles but is unable to do anything to help her.

“It’s okay, mom. Time for rest will come.” Taeyeon hears herself vocalise, unsure if she was convincing her mother or herself.


Taeyeon’s attention was brought to her phone as notifications began popping up after she turned it on when she landed in Korea.

She sees that the soshi group chat was exploding with messages. She taps on the messaging application and goes into the chatroom.


Yoona: Omo, Taeny date in LA? Link

Sooyoung: Where’s our invite? :’(

Sunny: I knew it! 

Seohyun: ♡♡

Yuri: That avocado toast looks good.

Yoona: Fr! Is it good? @taeyeon @tiffany

Sunny: I think @tiffany is asleep. It’s like 4am there right now.

Sooyoung: Yeah she probably needs her rest 😏

Yuri: 😏

Yoona: 😏

Sunny: 😏

Seohyun: Yeah! Touring would’ve been so tiring.

Sooyoung: Ah yes. Touring. (Definitely not because of Taeyeon)

Yoona: 😂🤭

Seohyun: Why because of taeyeon unnie?

Sunny: Let's not taint the mind of this poor child.

Sooyoung: 😂😂😂

Yuri: 😂😂😂

Yoona: 😂😂😂

Yoona: What about @taeyeon? Where are you?

Yoona: @taeyeon unnie~

Sunny: @taeyeon

Yuri: @taeyeon

Sooyoung: @taeyeon

Seohyun: @taeyeon

Hyoyeon: What is going on with the spam?

Hyoyeon: oh

Hyoyeon: @taeyeon

Yoona: 😂


Taeyeon chuckles as she reads the chat. 


I was on the plane 🙄 


The avocado toast was really good actually 😋


She sends to the chat and keeps her phone in her pocket, turning her attention to Zero, who was on her mother’s lap. 

“Was that Tiffany?” Her mother asks casually.

Taeyeon shakes her head. “It was the girls. They were being so noisy.” Taeyeon smiles a little.

“I miss them.” Her smile turns into a longing one.

Taeyeon’s mother places her hand on Taeyeon’s knee and it gently. She did not need to say anything for Taeyeon to understand how she felt and what she wished for her daughter. 

“Thank you, mom.” Taeyeon says as she squeezes her mother’s hand.

“I know that you’ve been trying to help me. Sometimes even though I sound ungrateful or lash out at you, I just want you to know that I see it and am thankful.” Taeyeon exhales and looks at her mother earnestly. Her mother was not a perfect person but Taeyeon sees her trying. Trying to be better, trying to empathise with her daughter, trying to understand her. To Taeyeon, that was enough. 


By the time Tiffany was awake, it was almost noon. After Taeyeon had left the day before, she had spent the rest of her evening catching up on shows on netflix, before having a light dinner and retiring to bed early. She had a few days off to rest and recuperate from the tour that had just finished. 

She checked her phone, a few messages from her tour staff talking about a new hire and a huge amount of notifications from the soshi group chat. She giggles as she sees her members teasing Taeyeon and her. 


The next few weeks were no different from the weeks that have passed. Tiffany was busy with her schedules and the team was impressed with the new girl that had started working with them. She was efficient with her work and it was always done flawlessly. There were no problems caused by her and she was also well liked by her peers with her witty conversations and funny jokes. It was also a bonus that she was very attractive. Everyone in the crew, including Tiffany, thought that she was a great addition.


The number of calls between Tiffany and Taeyeon have also significantly increased. They called almost everyday, either in the morning or at night, sometimes even both times, sharing about the day that has passed or about anything they could possibly think of. Sometimes they just called and did their own things, seeking comfort in each other’s presence. 


Taeyeon enjoyed the parts where Tiffany told her about her life and her work. She was happy that Tiffany had a safe and non toxic working environment and that Tiffany had good people around her who made her day a little less tiring, a little less hard. 



A/N: Hope yall liked this one, a light hearted one before the angst next chapter hehe. Thanks for reading and have a great one!

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Fire_trek 358 streak #1
Chapter 37: It’s thanksgiving where I am and I’m giving thanks to Taeny and this fic.. it was a wild ride of angst and fluff but I loved it nonetheless. Beautifully written and amazingly executed. I can’t wait until I read your other fics when I get time! Thank you author nim!
Fire_trek 358 streak #2
Chapter 36: Yeah, Taeny is back! I loved this story even though it’s almost over :( the girl seemed like a great girl, but Taeny is the real deal!
Fire_trek 358 streak #3
Chapter 35: In Sunny we trust! She’s like the coffee shop girl calling Tae a lol she had the best advice maybe Taeyeon could get Sunny and the coffee shop girl together… never mind they’d be too powerful for this world lol
Fire_trek 358 streak #4
Chapter 34: The chat is something I’d pay to be apart of. But in all honesty I’d probably be Hyoyeon to the chat and ignore it all lol.. even though I love the fluff I’m looking forward to the angst!
Fire_trek 358 streak #5
Chapter 33: Omg they kissed in public! Big girl moves they’re taking I see lol.. it was nice to see them together, even if it was for a little bit. I don’t know how they will cope without each other, maybe a surprise meeting soon?
Fire_trek 358 streak #6
Chapter 32: Another great chapter, Taeny really brighten up my day, seriously. Yes, Tiffany has grown into herself more as a woman and a person. This makes me happy
Fire_trek 358 streak #7
Chapter 31: Aww, you know I love fluff.. this was pure gold. Even though I love angst this was a good change of pace. Let them just be happy for once, right?
Fire_trek 358 streak #8
Chapter 30: That was hot 🥵 who knew Taeny had it in them? I know you were feeling apprehensive about writing this but it came out great!
Fire_trek 358 streak #9
Chapter 29: This was cute and I can’t wait for the next chapter!! here we come!
Fire_trek 358 streak #10
Chapter 28: This was sad but beautiful. Missing someone is a natural emotion for us to have, I’m glad she’s coping well with this tho. I miss the coffee shop girl tho lol