Chapter 47: Gay panic

“What is with that long face. Did he cancel on you again?” noting the long sigh from Seul, he knew exactly what it means. It apparently became a habit for Yoongi to cancel on every date that he’s supposed to have with Seul.

Last week they were supposedly out for a date after a month not seeing each other and of course that included Yoongi’s bailing on Seul multiple times before rescheduling the dates. To her dismay, Yoongi stood her up once again and didn’t bother to leave a text notifying Seul about his sudden departure to Gangwon-do for their filming.

Was she mad?

Crazy to say no, but she was super upset.

Seul didn’t throw any tantrum instead she was worried that her boyfriend couldn’t get enough rest from the trip. Even though, she pulled an all-nighter to prepare the food for their picnic by the Han River and waited for hours there, she didn’t want to bother Yoongi with it.

Wongeun was furious of Yoongi insensible act these days. He caught her bawling her eyes out twice during her break, yet she pretended everything was alright. Not to mention, this was Yoongi’s idea to begin with. He suggested Seul to work as a barista again, claiming that he wanted Seul to have her normal life back.

Due to the recent event, he thought it was best for Seul to be surrounded with her friends and healthy work environment. With Kwon out from the picture, Wongeun was now responsible in handling the business alone so it wouldn’t be a problem for Seul to continue working there.

“Have you talked to him about this?”

“Not yet, Yoongi is busy. I didn’t have time to talk to him..” she sighed.

“Can’t he spare just 10 minutes out of his busy time? Seul, it had been two months. He’s slowly drifting himself away from you. Don’t you notice that?” there was a hint of frustration in Wongeun voice clearly not liking the way Seul handled this issue. Communication is key to a healthy relationship. If none of them speaks up about this, they will ruin that one relationship that they have.

“I tried, but he seemed to be super busy. I went to clean their place like I usually did.. but he wasn’t at home. Others had no idea where he went, but they said he probably stressing out in his studio back in the company. I don’t want to bother him”

“You know he can’t be busy all the time when you come to tend your job or to hang out with the boys right? He is avoiding you Seul-ah. You need to talk to him”

“I know. I am a coward. I don’t know what went wrong oppa. After what happened to me few months ago, was he disgusted of me?” she looked down, clenching onto the edge of the counter. The pain started to engulf her heart again, and it was unbearable without Yoongi by her side.

Wongeun embraced the small girl in front of him, caressing her hair softly “There is no way he is disgusted with you. He loves you. It is hard time for you and Yoongi. I am sure he wanted to talk it out to you. He is a man with few words and you know him better” Seul let her tears fall for the first time in front of Wongeun. She shielded her pain from others these past few months acting she was fine when, she’s broken inside. All she needed was to cuddle with Yoongi even for few minutes.

“Will it work? Yoongi and I barely talk to each other. He didn’t even answer my text as frequently as before and I couldn’t even remember when was the last time we looked into each other eyes. I am invisible to him. It hurts so bad” she sobbed.

“It will work, give him a surprise visit and talk to him. This can’t be solved without a proper conversation Seul. Something is bugging him and knowing Yoongi, he wouldn’t just expose what’s on his mind to anyone. Do not jump into conclusion without talking to him” he pulled away from the hug, wiping the tears off her cheeks.

The sad girl nodded in agreement as she braced herself from the unexpected outburst.

“Now, I am going to let you head back early today. Promise me, you will meet Yoongi right after this, and talk to him” he eyed the girl with a smile.

Uncertain by his suggestion, she gave it a final thought before gathering her strength to do the confrontation. She sent Jin a quick text asking for their whereabouts knowing her boyfriend would take hours to respond to her text or none at all.

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Her breath hitched at the sight of the door to Yoongi’s studios and for some reason the confidence that she gained earlier with Wongeun was fading away. Upon confirming Yoongi whereabouts with the oldest in the group, she went to Bighit office right away.

The walk to Bighit felt extremely long and dreary. Therefore, along the way to the company Seul managed to buy Yoongi’s favourite coffee and snacks just to kill time.

Zero idea why she had to feel extremely nervous meeting Yoongi today, perhaps it had been two weeks since they last saw each other. Well, technically they bumped into each other on her way back from their apartment last week.

He didn’t even smile at her and seemed edgy. Instead, he urged Seul to head back home before it got dark. Seul was disappointed by the cold treatment that she received from him. So, as an understanding girlfriend, Seul got over her sorrow and pretended that never happen.

Mayhap, it was his bad day.

Everyone has that one bad day, right?

She pushed the small button, clenching onto the plastic bag tight while chanting her virtual scripts mentally that she already prepared an hour ago. She must not come unprepared knowing there’s so much things to say yet so little chance to be truthful about it. Seul chose to ring the bell even though having the access code to the studio. Her fears turned Seul into the biggest coward tonight.

Shortly after she was greeted with her sweetheart dishevelled appearance. Yoongi was clearly shocked as he didn’t expect any guest today. He was used to Seul texting him for a heads up, making plans instead of showing up at the doorstep in the middle of the night.

“Hi..I brought you food, can I come in?” he flinched at the formality and it made things awkward between them.

It would be a lie that seeing his woman stood prettily in front of him did not wash away all the worries and stress inside him. He had been longing to see his girl. In fact, his hands were itching to pull the small girl into his embrace, inhaling her sweet scent that could cure his illness.

“Are you that surprised to see me?” her eyelashes batted oh so innocently, wavering Yoongi’s heart.

How could he ignore this precious girl? Not be able to hold her like he usually did was torturous.

A day felt like months.

“Yoongi?” her oh so sweet voice melted every nerve inside his body.

He heard Seul calling for his name again and this time her fingers lingered around his bicep, trying to snap him out of his daydream.

Yoongi snapped out from his thought and finally responded “Sorry. Come in” he moved away allowing the girl to slide into his studio. Seul shifted awkwardly making her way inside, taking a good look of Yoongi’s studio. It had been months since she came here to spend time together.

“Were you working today?”

Seul nodded with a soft smile, scrutinizing her lover exhausted face “Wongeun let me leave early today so I can meet you..and talk..” she mumbled faintly.

Yoongi mind momentarily froze basically not ready to have that kind of talk with Seul. He wasn’t prepared for this and Yoongi didn’t want to ruin the things that he had with her. Not like this.

Setting down the packed food and drinks on the table, she took few steps closer to Yoongi and encircled her arms around his waist tightly. “I am sorry” she pressed her cheeks to his, inhaling his scent which was comforting.

“Why are you apologizing baby?” he let out a heavy sigh and held her close. How could he have survived the past few months without her by his side? How foolish was him to ignore her due to his personal issue? It wasn’t even Seul’s fault to begin with, it was his stupid insecurities.

He could have handled it better than shutting her off from his life.

“For everything. I don’t know why you feel so far away from me Yoongs, I want you to know that I will always be here for you. I miss you” her voice broke his heart into million pieces.

What have you done Min Yoongi?

“It is not you my love, it is me”

Seul leaned her head back and looked up at him “What actually happen Yoongi? Tell me”

“You won’t understand Seul” he released her and created a small gap between them.

“Make me understand Yoongs. If it is about me, I can fix it for you, if you just stop pushing me away. I love you so much and it never change. I don’t know what went wrong between us, I don’t want to lose you. Wer