THE NEXT DAY

It was 5pm and Kyulkyung was busy preparing dinner in their dorm's kitchen as her Nayoung was coming home. It has been a gruelling 2 nights without Nayoung by her side as she slept and she could not wait to be in her arms again. Being busy in the kitchen also helped to keep her mind off her condition and what she has been going through. She was just focused on cooking the best kimchi fried rice for the most important person in her life. 

As she was setting the table, the sound of the door opening caused her to jump slightly before she rushed to the door and engulfed the person who just walked through it in a hug. "Wow someone must have missed me" Nayoung said as she pulled Kyulkyung out of the hug to stare at her. "Dont you miss me too hmph" Kyulkyung pouted at Nayoung. Leaning forward, Nayoung's smashed her lips against Kyulkyung's, trying to convey how much she missed her through her actions instead. Pulling out of the kiss, Nayoung turns Kyulkyung around before backhugging her and softly lays her head on Kyulkyung's shoulder, "I missed you so much babe, let's just stay like that for awhile". Just like that, they stayed in that position for a few minutes before Kyulkyung speaks up, "Narong, I cooked your favourite for dinner shall we?". Nayoung hums in reply as she lets go of Kyulkyung and they walked to their dining table.

After dinner, the two ended up on their bed as Nayoung spooned Kyulkyung once again to sleep. Nayoung was tired from the long journey back and she fell asleep almost instantly. Not Kyulkyung though, too many thoughts were in her head. And just like few nights ago she turned around to face her stone beauty, reaching how to gently touch Nayoung's face as if she was trying to commit every single one of her stone features into memory. I love you, I love you, I am scared Narong, can you live without me cause I know I cant. Forgive me for keeping secrets from you, I dont want to but I dont want you worrying everyday. That will only pain me more. Kyulkyung buried her face into Nayoung's chest as she slowly willed herself to sleep.

NEXT WEEK

School that week went as usual. Kyulkyung had a headache as bad as the one she got a few nights back once. Nayoung was having night classes that day and Kyulkyung was home alone but she managed to stagger into the kitchen to get the painkillers there Thank you so much Eunwoo, if not for you I would be dying of pain already, Kyulkyung thought as she took the painkillers not forgetting to pack them up though so Nayoung would not know. Nayoung went home to find a peacefully sleeping Kyulkyung which she thought was weird because the younger girl used to always wait for her. But she knew school was tiring so she just shrugged it off.

The day came for Kyulkyung to visit the hospital to get her test results and receive her diagnosis. Kyulkyung had ended lessons early that day while Nayoung still had some afternoon lectures to attend. In the lecture hall, Nayoung felt a slight vibration in her pocket, taking out her phone she saw that a message from Kyulkyung had come. "I have last minute night classes today Narong, don't wait for me and just head home first alright. Love you" Nayoung types a quick reply before she went back to concentrating in class.

Kyulkyung went back to the dorm room to change and was waiting at the entrance of their dorm building for Eunwoo. 10 minutes into her waiting time though, she got a text from Eunwoo "I am so so sorry Kyul, I know I promised to collect your results together but my boss called me for a last minute shift at the cafe and I can't not go. You will be fine. Tell me what the doctor says later alright. I'm sorry". Kyulkyung sighs as types a reply back to Eunwoo before heading to the hospital on her own.

AT THE HOSPITAL

Taking a deep breath, Kyulkyung knocked on the door of the doctor she was referred to. Entering, she was greeted by a beautiful female doctor who gestured for her to sit down. "Hi Ms Kyulkyung, I am Doctor Kim Do Yeon and I will be your attending doctor. I am a trained neurologist and one of the lead researchers for CADASIL. I have looked through your results and I am sorry to say but you are diagnosed with CADASIL, which is why you have been transferred over to me". "Cada-what" "CADASIL". Kyulkyung was slightly shocked to know that she was indeed sick but she had never in her life heard of this illness. "This illness is hereditary so it is likely that one of your parents or grandparents have had it. Would you happen to know?" "I'm an orphan, I don't have the slightest clue of who my parents are so no, I do not know. And would you care to explain to me what I am suffering from and is it curable". "Oh, I am sorry I did not know, well CADASIL....."

BACK AT SCHOOL

Nayoung stretched her arms as her last lecture ended. Right at that moment when their professor left the lecture hall, Nayoung saw Yaebin bouncing in through the doors before englufing Kyungwon in a hug. What is Yaebin doing here, shouldnt she be in class. Kyulkyung said they have lessons? "Yah, shortie are you skipping lessons, Kyulkyung said you have classes?" Yaebin looked back at Nayoung with confusion painted across her face. "Huh, what? All our lessons ended early today, Kyulkyung said she was going back to the dorm and Eunwoo is off for a last minute shift at the cafe." Nayoung was confused, why would Kyulkyung lie. Nayoung had a worried look on her face that Minkyung could not help but worry too, "Maybe she is giving you some sort of surprise Nana, dont look so afraid you stone, let's get back?" Hearing what Minkyung said, Nayoung nodded and a smile reached her face and she decided to just head back to their dorm where she expected Kyulkyung to be there waiting for her with some sort of surprise. 

AT THE DORM

"Kyul-ah" Nayoung shouts happily as she opened the door to their dorm. "Kyul? You home?" Silence and an empty dorm greeted her as she entered and locked the door. What where is she if she isnt home. Hmmm maybe I should just call her. With that she picked up her phone to call Kyulkyung, 10 times and all 10 times she was just left hanging. This was worrying her as it was not like Kyulkyung to lie and to not pick up her phone for so long. Where are you Kyul-ah. Nayoung was so worried she could not help but pace back and forth in the room while looking up to check the time every once in awhile.

ON THE ROAD LEADING TO THE DORM

It was already 8pm, there Kyulkyung was a envelope clutched tightly in her arms as she trudged back to the dorm the words of the Doctor Kim echoing in her head. Then, she stopped right infront of a bin, raising up the envelope, she tears the envelope and its contents before throwing them into the bin infront of her. Looking up from the bin, she forced a smile up her face before walking back to the dorm. Nayoung is waiting.

BACK AT THE DORM

Nayoung did not stop worrying for a single second but seeing the time she figured she should take a shower before she continues to wait for Kyulkyung to reach home. Just as she came out of the shower, she heard the door open and she dashed to the front door before exclaiming. "Where have you been Kyul? I was so worried. Yaebin said you guys did not have lessons and you went home, why did you lie to me?" Ugh Yaebin, right I cant blame her. I need an excuse er....er... Kyulkyung was slightly flustered and she was trying very hard to think of a reason before she suddenly thought of one. "Narong" Kyulkyung says softly as she hugs Nayoung, she knows the girl was worried. "Sorry for making you worry, but since I ended lessons early I thought of taking the bus out further to get your favourite noodles but when I finally reached there, it was closed for the day. I wanted to take the bus back but I took the wrong one and so I ended up getting lost and that is why I got back to late". It was the perfect excuse, Kyulkyung was always bad at directions, Nayoung would not suspect a thing, Kyulkyung hoped. 

Letting out a breath of relief, Nayoung hugs Kyulkyung back before flicking her forehead. Kyulkyung yelped in pain. "That is for making me worry, now let's just have some ramyeon for dinner" Nayoung says as she heads to the kitchen.

Just like every night, Nayoung falls asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. Kyulkyung though could not sleep a wink, her head was just replaying the scene in the hospital....

BACK IN DR KIM'S ROOM

"CADASIL is a hereditary disorder. It will cause you to have transient ischemic attacks or even . This explains the symptoms that you have been experiencing so far. If you have mini or too frequently, I hate to say this but yes you are at a risk of losing your life. Even if you do not end up getting a severe that could cost you your life, CADASIL also leads to you suffering from subcortial dementia. This means that you will gradually lose your memories and overtime, you would not be able to remember even simple things like how to use chopsticks to eat." Hearing all these at once, Kyulkyung could not say a thing and she just sat there frozen. "I am sorry, but CADASIL is still uncurable as of now. We are researching though. I know it is difficult for you to digest all these at once, I am truly sorry Ms Kyulkyung." Kyulkyung was stunned and she could not say a thing. She picked up the envelope of her results and diagnosis and left without saying a single word.

What do I do now? I am just going to forget Nayoung one day, I will forget my love for her and I will forget what she means to me. Do I still deserve her then, if I can't even remember that I love her anymore...