CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

the fight

The room was filled with filtered afternoon light, too dark to be day and too bright to be night. A shadow is visible against the hazy background of dim orange. The shadow is sitting at a corner of the bed, her legs crossed loosely on the unmade covers.  She clicks open the lighter she’s holding in a slow, steady beat.

One, two, click.

One, two, click.

One, two-

The phone rings.

She waits five seconds until she picks it up.

‘It’s me. When are you coming back? For the opening night? Or you’re not coming?’

Please come back.

‘What time is it?’

‘Eleven. If you’re coming, we want to buy tickets.’

She begins clicking her lighter again.

One, two, click.

‘Soojung?’ Kyungsoo felt nervous with the silence.

‘I don’t think I can go.’ She turned her head to the blurry light from the behind the curtains. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Okay, call us when you come back then. They said they wanted to watch a movie, maybe.’

One, two, click.

‘I don’t think I’m coming back.’

‘You’re coming back tomorrow?’

‘Could you tell Jongin I’m sorry?’

‘What?’ Kyungsoo exchanged bewildered looks with Rei, whose eyes were patient and cautious, like a soldier hiding mere feet away from enemies’ territory. ‘Sorry for-‘

‘For everything.’ Soojung swallowed her tears. ‘For everything I did.’

‘Uh-‘ he looked to Rei for assurance. ‘-Jongin’s not here. I could remind you tomorrow if you’d like.’ He gripped Rei’s hand, while in the other she began swiftly clicking on the screen of her phone.

‘I won’t be there.’

‘You won’t…come back at all?’ he stuttered. Her lips shut, Rei pulled Kyungsoo and urged him to sprint after her.

‘No.’ Soojung’s voice was a mere whisper.

‘W-Why not?’ he asked. Rei was running faster now, and Kyungsoo’s focus was pushed and pulled between keeping the conversation going and chasing after her.

‘I’m going to make things right.’ Soojung’s voice was shaking but her resolve was clear and solid. Rei was making another call now, her eyes trailing from one street sign to another, then to the traffic, and to the pedestrians. She spoke in quick French while waving her arm high to a group of taxi drivers on the sidewalk smoking cigarettes.

‘What do you mean?’ Kyungsoo jerked when Rei pulled him forward after a driver noticed her flinging arm.

‘For Jongyeon.’ He could hear her smile through the phone.

‘Wait, Soojung-‘

Soojung hung up the phone, tears now messily running down her face. Her heart was thumping loud and fast and she failed to hold back the sobs. She paced around in her cramped room, breathing in the stuffy air to regain composure over herself. She slipped her phone into the pocket of her pants, tucking it well so that it would not show.

Soojung crept out of her room, finding her brother on the couch. He had a can of beer in his hand and was fixated to the television humming and flashing images at him. He shot a brief glance at his sister then turned back to the show.

One, two, click.

He said nothing.

One, two, click.

She walked to the kitchen to fetch a glass of water. felt dry.

One, two, click.

The television continued humming.

One, two, click.

‘Knock it off.’

Soojung carried her eyes across the knife collection her mother kept but had rarely ever used. She looked for the sharpest blade, the shiniest one.

One, two, click.

‘Smoking’s not good for you, you know.’

She smiled.

‘I know.’

One, two, click.

‘For ’s sake-‘ he turned around, and his eyes widened. Soojung stood there behind him with a knife in her hand. ‘-what are you doing?’

She approached him with the knife in front of her – a butcher’s knife. Her mother used it to cut meat but she rarely ever cooked. Soohyun slowly got up from the couch.

‘Soojung, put it down.’

‘Not after you confess.’ She said, her eyes still wet with tears.

‘I thought we were over this. I told you, didn’t I? I had nothing to do with your girlfriend.’

‘You’re lying.’ She grinned an irritated grin. ‘You think I don’t know how you stalked her? You followed her that night, didn’t you? You wanted her to get rid of the pictures. You wanted her to stop going to the police.’

‘Soojung-‘ he put up defensive hands. ‘-you heard what the police said. She committed suicide.’

‘You really think we’re stupid, don’t you? You don’t think she tells me? First it was you, and then your friends came one by one. You think I don’t know? When she said she wasn’t going to do what you wanted her to do you left her there so that your friends could finish her up. Then you made it look like she hanged herself. I have texts, Soohyun. I saved our calls.’

‘You won’t be able to prove it was me.’ He stood up straight, shaking away his initial fear.

‘Maybe, but I’m going to try. I’m going to let the world know what a monster you are.’

‘You’re the one holding the knife, Soojung, not me.’ He chuckled.

‘Is that how you laughed when you watched her die?’

‘I did what I had to. She was trying to ruin my life. I can see she’s already ruined yours.’

‘She’s 15, Soohyun. You killed a 15-year old girl.’

Soohyun ran a hand through his hear and for two seconds looked guilty and ashamed. He shook his head, looking insincerely sympathetic.

‘For a 15-year old girl she was posing more damage than she should have. I merely reacted based on instinct.’ His voice was calm and reasonable.

You won’t get away with this.

He could see the tiger-like eyes that stared deep into his that night. That casual tilt of her head, the cool smile on her lips. She was threatening, she was ready. She made him feel frightened.

I can.

‘You killed someone.’

Just then there were three knocks on the door. Soojung did not lift her gaze off her brother.

‘You better open the door.’

Her red eyes now looked like the edge of the blade she was holding. ‘Get on your knees.’

‘Are you kidding me?’

‘Get on your ing knees, Soohyun!’ she yelled. Soohyun rolled his eyes and did as he is told. ‘Tell me how you did it. I want to hear it.’

‘Where do I start?’ he sighed, not at all minding the knife he was holding. ‘It was when you got involved with her. I always told you, didn’t I? Don’t say things you’re not supposed to say, but what did you do? You spread lies, Soojung. You tell her all these things about how mean and bad I am when all this time what did I do? Work day and night trying to take care of you. I feed you and keep you safe and what do you say?’

You’re a monster.

‘And she’s stupid enough to believe you so she goes make a trip to the police, and tells them all these things you’ve been telling her. But you pretended you didn’t know anything when they came asking questions about you. Of course, daddy’s little girl’s never wrong.’

Soojung grit her teeth.

‘I thought that was the end of that, but then she gets a little too nosy. Did you know she talked to my ex? Trying to dig for bad things I might have done? Of course, my ex wasn’t the type who minded her own business either, so your girlfriend found a bunch of things I did. Things that could ruin my career.’ He glared up at his sister. ‘I couldn’t afford to let her get in my way, right when things are starting to look better for me. So I looked for her.’

Soojung’s hand was sweating holding the knife now.

‘She wouldn’t talk to me of course, but I found her anyhow, illegally-‘ he pressed his voice. ‘-working in a small café very close to your school.’

Soojung swallowed.

‘I’m a civilized person, Soojung, and you know that. All I wanted to do was, talk.’

She gripped the knife harder.

‘But she didn’t want that. I tried to plead to her, tried to-‘ he shook his head. ‘-and it’s all because of you.’

It’s all my fault.

‘If you hadn’t told her-‘

It’s not your fault.

‘No.’ Soojung gripped the knife hard. ‘Say you did it.’ She was crying now.

‘You want an apology?’ he looked up at her. ‘Fine. Sorry I killed your ing girlfriend. Happy?’ he raised his voice.

‘Say her name.’

‘I won’t.’

‘Say it!’

‘Alright! I killed Kim Jongyeon! Is that what you wanted to hear? I killed Jongyeon! I killed your girlfriend!’

Soojung’s lips were shaking now and she closed them tight. She took steps backwards and distanced herself away from him. She placed the knife on the dining table and inhaled heavily.

The door flung open.

‘Soojung!’ Kyungsoo and Rei was standing at the door, perhaps relieved to see that she looked normal, but became confused when they saw Soohyun on his knees.

‘You recorded that, didn’t you?’ his voice was a soft growl. As he was rising to his feet, Soojung headed for the door, her hand pressing against the phone inside her pocket. ‘You ing .’ He hissed and lunged at her, managing to grab her by her arm and pull her to the floor.

‘Get her out of here.’ Rei said in a hurry to Kyungsoo before throwing herself against Soohyun. There was a loud thud and Soojung raised her head to find Rei was struggling to keep him on the ground. ‘Go!’

‘Get off her!’ Soojung tried to reach her, but Kyungsoo yanked her away before she could.

‘We have to go.’ he told her in a sorry tone and with strength, managed to pull her out of the apartment.

‘But Rei-‘

‘It’ll be fine.’ Nothing was sure in Kyungsoo’s voice, for even he dared not look back to imagine what could happen to Rei.  Save her first. Even if something happens, Soojung comes first. She must be safe.

I’m sorry.

Rei managed to mouth those words to Soojung before the door closed shut. Soohyun shoved her easily off him for she was nothing but a mere teenage girl. He would have remained alarmed for he saw the dark eyes, the black hair and the lights were not switched on for him to see better, but he looked long enough to know that it was not Jongyeon holding him down.

She scrambled to her feet.

Soohyun made furious steps towards the door and Rei pulled him back. Attempting to eliminate the obstacle, Soohyun raised a hand intended to make a blow but Rei was swift enough to evade it and she kicked him hard on his calf, sending him into temporary imbalance and pain.

She attempted to reach the door, counting the mere time she had.

‘I can’t leave her in there!’  Soojung was yelling as Kyungsoo dragged her down the stairs.

‘The police are here! We can tell them!’

‘What if he kills her?’ her face was in total disarray. It was a mixture of panic, sweat, nightmares and fear. Kyungsoo came to a halt. ‘Kyungsoo, please! I can’t let someone else die because of me.’

Kyungsoo curled his fists. ‘I’ll go. You go down and tell the police.’

‘I want to go with you.’

‘No!’ he almost shouted at her. ‘Someone has to tell them what’s going on.’ He held her shoulders. ‘Do you hear me? Go quick!’ he sent her off and Soojung ran downstairs. Kyungsoo looked back up at the winding stairs reeking of cement dust.

His head felt light and everything felt unreal.

He ran back upstairs.

Then, a gunshot sounded.

‘Five men beating up a 15-year old girl? I must be really scary.’ Jongyeon laughed. It must have been her last laugh. Perhaps she wanted to be remembered that way: carefree and laughing.

‘Only a fool takes chances.’ Soohyun turned his back on her.

‘Only a fool turns his back on his enemies before they’re dead.’ She murmured, knowing well he could never stay to watch.

Soohyun twisted. His back felt cold. Rei was on her knees, her head low and her coughs echoing through the void of the apartment. She spit out dark blood onto the wooden floor.

Will you stay to find out what happened?

He ignored her all at once and ran out instead. There was only one thing on his mind and that was the recording Soojung had of his confession. He had to chase after it, after the plain road ahead that would lead to the field of flowers of gold but the more he ran the more he saw it fading into a single point of pure blackness.

Rei’s world was spinning around her. The blood on her tongue tasted sweet but her legs could still carry her somehow. She captured the shadowy figure of him and blasted herself. She must have targeted him accurately because she felt herself reaching a body. Rei gathered force and pulled him back inside.

Soohyun slid on the floor, but his eyes caught the small gun on the floor. He glanced at her and found her still slowed down by weakness – he had given her a good beating. She had to hold on to the end of the dining table to remain upright and her disoriented vision had not yet recovered.

This is my chance.

He kicked her in the stomach again, sending her backwards.

I won’t let my guard down.

He raised the gun.

She held the pain within her in agony.

I won’t die. I can’t die. She’s waiting for me.

He stood up, towering over her. He had killed a girl before and he was not afraid to do it again.

A gunshot was released.