chapter sixteen

the secret of secret keepers

‘Where’s Jongin?’ was the first thing that slipped off Kyungsoo’s tongue when he arrived at the cafeteria. Sehun and Rei simultaneously raised their heads at him.

‘He’s meeting with his caretaker,’ Soojung answered for him, her eyes focused on carefully piling her sandwich. ‘He’ll be back soon enough, he said.’ She said, as if clueless to Kyungsoo’s implied intention. Sehun cleared his throat, then continued casually eating his food. Rei subtly elbowed him, as an indication that he was acting obvious, and Sehun shrunk before he could get mad at her.

Kyungsoo quietly put down his food tray and sat beside Soojung. He was not sure whether it was homesickness or just hunger, but Kyungsoo had been eating cafeteria food (or cantine, as they called it there) without feeling the slightest sick of it ever since moving there. Kyungsoo thought the food was better than it was at home. He did not see why Baekhyun did not have any appetite to eat at all.

Baekhyun was scrolling through his phone as he ate, a fork in his other hand as it poked aimlessly into the bowl of salad he was having. When he glanced at the fresh leafy greens and vegetables he looked hesitant. Eventually, Baekhyun put his entire attention on his phone, barely finishing half of his food.

Rei had the same thing, but looked more poised and at least interested in what she was eating. ‘Holy ,’ Baekhyun bent back, putting his phone down on the table. He continued scrolling, his eyes slightly more awake. Kyungsoo watched him from the other side of the table. Chanyeol was leaning towards him, trying to take a look at what had him hooked by the eye.

‘What is it?’ Soojung asked. Baekhyun raised his gaze, but not at Soojung.

‘Well, speak of the Devil.’ He said, and Kyungsoo turned to trail where Baekhyun’s eyes had landed. He could see nothing out of the ordinary; just a group of boys that had just entered the dining hall, trying to make their way through the crowds, while another group was trying to get out. The group of boys walked with the pride of lions pass their table, and Kyungsoo could not help but notice that one of them; a tall, black-haired boy with a sharp brown gaze, was eyeing someone from his own group.

Rei cleared , continuing to eat her food in uncomfortable silence.

‘Anyway-‘ Baekhyun continued. ‘-see the blonde kid? The one right at the back? That’s Ryu Jinwoo.’ he was careful with his voice. Kyungsoo turned from Rei to the boy Baekhyun was referring to. He had the kind of eyes that was pale but outlined with a dark shadow that emitted a dangerous kind of vibe, but Kyungsoo could not deny he was no less than good-looking. ‘Word has it that he might face expulsion if he’s found guilty of assaulting a girl.’

Soojung’s eyes turned wide. ‘Who?’

‘Bae Yoori,’ Rei answered.

‘Weren’t they dating?’ Chanyeol asked.

‘Yeah,’ Baekhyun raised his brows. ‘Crazy isn’t it? Someone in my class said he doesn’t feel bad about it. They were literally screaming at each other when they met at the police station,’

‘Crazy,’ Sehun repeated. Rei clasped her lips, then got up from the bench, carrying her tray with her. ‘You’re done?’

She nodded, smiling weakly before she left the lunch hall.

‘Is she okay?’ Kyungsoo asked.

‘Who knows?’ Baekhyun said.

‘Maybe it’s her ex,’ Sehun answered. The look on Kyungsoo’s face prompted Sehun to explain further. ‘Lee Jaehyun, that blonde kid’s group as well.’ He tilted his head to where the group of boys had settled down.

‘The black haired one?’ he confirmed.

‘Yeah. How do you know?’

‘He was looking at her,’

Sehun shrugged. ‘Rei never talked about it. Probably won’t if you asked,’

‘Should I check on her?’ Kyungsoo was genuinely concerned. He had never seen Rei walk away out of the blue like that.

‘If you can find her,’ Sehun said. ‘She has a thing with disappearing sometimes. We assume she does that when she really is bothered about something.’ He explained. He was slightly annoyed with the lack of response, but then again, Sehun probably knew better than he did, so Kyungsoo held his tongue.

When they returned to class, Sehun saw Rei standing outside their classroom, talking to someone on the phone. My intuition stands, Sehun felt triumphant. Rei caught him glancing at her after ending the call.

‘Who was that?’ he asked when she approached him.

‘Depends,’ Rei returned to her desk, slipping her phone in her bag. She turned to Sehun, looking up at him.

‘That transparent, huh?’ he asked, sitting down in his seat and Rei did so too.

‘You’ve been staring ever since lunch,’ she said.

‘How do you know everything again?’ Sehun squinted his eyes.

‘I don’t,’ she said.

‘Not everything,’ he rolled his eyes, assuming she had comprehended it differently.

‘I know,’ she smiled and Sehun almost forgot what he wanted to ask seeing the look on her face. He cleared his throat.

‘Is Jaehyung still bothering you?’ his voice was careful.

Rei raised an eyebrow. ‘No,’ she did not ask further. More questions will lead to more questions, and that opens up more doors to secrets, and she was not one who kept secrets for people to know they existed. Having a locked chest was not enough. She liked it buried, without a trace.

‘You don’t really talk about him. Was it really that bad?’ he asked.

Rei heard a voice chuckle from within. Bad? You have no idea. ‘Let’s just say, we could not get along outside of relationships.’ She answered simply.

‘Right,’ he understood what he thought she meant. He had dated those kinds of girls too. Good to date but not for the long run, and not good as a friend either. ‘And now you’re not interested in dating?’

‘It doesn’t cross my mind,’ she rested her chin on her hand. ‘What about you? Was your last time when you were at home?’

Sehun nodded. ‘It’s nice. I don’t know about you, but girls make really great company. The ones I dated at least. Sure, the first time around when the boys keep pushing you to get a girl it was all for some non-existent trophy, like a reputation, but I think that’s all just stupid. Having someone care about you and getting to know someone, I liked it. I sound sensitive, right?’

Rei did not think so, but did not say it either.

‘But you never had anything serious?’

‘To the point I wanted to be committed? Not really,’ he shrugged. ‘It sounds like something heavy and difficult. You know what I mean right?’

She nodded.

‘Were you serious with Jaehyung?’

Rei toyed with her fingers, wondering what to tell.

‘I was never with him,’ she looked up at Sehun.

‘Are you serious?’ he looked baffled. ‘But everyone-‘

‘Yeah,’ she knew.

‘You don’t look like you’re going to tell,’

‘There’s not much to tell,’

‘That’s what you always say,’ he snorted, and Rei’s lips curved into a grin.

‘Maybe someday I’ll tell you,’ she said, but Sehun was not so convinced. She will not tell him. She never does.

From a first glance, it could be easily mistaken that Rei was a lone wolf; the type who wandered off alone and did not establish too many connections. Sehun feared that at first when he first saw her that Rei looked like one who knew too many people and too many people knew her. It raised the chances that she had many people she trusted and perhaps would find it hard to commit her trust alone into their tedious business.

However, he soon later learned that it was the complete opposite; that many people trusted her and thus many came to her in need of different favours, not just in obtaining illegal goods. She established many connections, but gave them enough depth to gain trust of many acquaintances, not enough to owe them her personal stories and secrets.

This, of course benefited them well and Rei proved to be a very strong and important member of the clique before she gained their care and genuine concern. They knew she could be trusted but was not one to be intimate with in any manner. Outside of business affairs, nobody knew where she would head off to. Nobody asked.

Rei had agreed to meet with Doyoon again after her tutoring classes.

He had called out of the blue asking if she was free. The tone in his voice did not sound urgent but Rei could predict that meeting him would open up hints about Jongyeon, if he did not say it first. They chose to meet in a different café. Rei arrived fifteen minutes early, and she seated herself and ordered a drink. She took a deep breath as she threw her gaze aimlessly. Faint modern pop music was playing in the background and the few number of customers made the shop all the more peaceful. It was not completely silent, but it was peaceful.

It was the kind of silence Rei was comfortable in. One that came without pressure. She was free to be there until the café closed. No one would tell her off or tell her what to do. There was no reminder of obligations out in the open. It was something she could not quite find in the school compounds, even when she is lying in bed on a Saturday morning when there is no school.

It felt freer where she was somehow. Perhaps being outside what set the parameters of the school, meant there was no parameter to her either. She could not quite tell, but it did not matter for she would enjoy these few hours of being out in the open.

Ten minutes later, she saw a boy in a school uniform enter the café, his earphones plugged. Rei raised a hand to catch his attention and he walked to her. He put down his bag and went to buy a drink before returning.

‘I didn’t catch your name the last time we met,’ there was exhaustion drawn across his face, in the lines weighing beneath his still youthful eyes. Doyoon sat down in front of Rei, with a certain nervousness clinging onto his legs. ‘Mina, was it?’ he asked.

‘Rei,’ she answered. ‘I deliberately gave the wrong name,’

‘I see,’ Doyoon did not question her intentions.

‘What is it that you wanted to talk about?’

Doyoon cleared his throat. ‘It’s not much of a help for your search, actually.’ He roughly ran his hands through his hair after pulling out his earphones. ‘But I thought you might want to hear about Jongyeon,’ he paused. ‘About her in person.’

Rei kept her gaze on him.

‘I met Jongyeon when we were in school. She was, very outspoken. She wouldn’t tolerate any crap, you know? I wasn’t a really good student and I got into a lot of mess, and like any other stupid boy getting into big trouble made me feel strong and unbeatable. I felt like everyone would be scared of me and the things I did. But she was one of the people who weren’t, and she showed it.’ A fond smile hinted on his lips like a cherry tint. ‘I thought she was like me too, the way she was. Her hair was blonde and she always had like very dark eye makeup. But I always thought she was 13.’ An odd tinted mask shaded over Doyoon’s pale cheeks. His eyes wavered far too often and he found it hard to maintain his gaze solely on Rei, whose glistening eyes were sharper than they appeared. ‘She skipped two grades, that’s how smart she was. So we were in the same grade.’ He raised a shoulder. ‘I remember her so well because whenever she wanted to pass us at the stairs and we blocked the way, she had this very annoyed look on her face. Then she would glare at either of us, and we would keep blocking her way and she would just stand there, as if you know, we were a bunch of monkeys blocking her way.’

Rei lifted a corner of her lips, warmly amused. Doyoon glared at her.

‘W-What are you smiling about?’ he tried to threaten in a shaky voice, but Rei kept smiling and he could not help but grin too, at the thought of Jongyeon. ‘That’s what she used to call us,’ he said shyly. ‘I thought she was kind of cute, even though she was always angry. I thought she was that rich type, you know? She always looked as if she looked down on everyone, and one day I called her out for it and she got mad. And she cried,’ Doyoon pursed his lips. A slight look of guilt became apparent. ‘That’s how I-‘ he cleared his throat. ‘-yeah we got along after that. After I made her cry.’

Rei’s lack of expression made Doyoon nervous, and although he had no reason to explain himself he felt as if he needed to.

‘She yelled at me. Then I found out she was an orphan, and I stopped bothering her. I tried to make amends and later on we started seeing each other. It lasted for a few months,’ he said. ‘We broke up because-‘ he hesitated, placing a hand near his mouth as if contemplating on what he was about to say. ‘-Jongyeon said something like she wasn’t interested anymore. Not just in me, she said she’s not interested in guys.’

‘When was this?’ Rei asked.

‘A year ago? I got pissed about it. She said she still cares about me and that she’d be fine if we’re friends but I walked away,’

‘It’s pretty sudden,’ she commented.

‘It is. I thought maybe she was lying because she stayed with me even when I got expelled from school. Sure, she did get angry and we fought a lot but at the end of the day, besides the boys she would be there too. I don’t know if her brother knows about me but sometimes I think that maybe he’s the one who doesn’t want her to see me and I can’t really blame him if he does. But Jongyeon never tried to avoid me at all,’

‘Were you questioned?’ Rei kept her voice quiet. ‘By the police?’

‘Only because I was her workmate.’ He said. ‘Do you think someone really wanted to kill her?’

‘I don’t know,’ Rei shrugged.

‘If you find out, tell me.’ He said, pleading with his eyes.

Rei nodded. ‘I will,’ she promised. She caught the look on Doyoon’s face, feeling an instant second-hand remorse. ‘I’m sorry for what happened to her,’

Doyoon hung his head low. ‘She…really made me not be such a bad person, you know? It’s hard to think someone could ever want to hurt her,’ he forced a smile. ‘I guess that’s just how it is, you know? The really good people always gets killed.’

Rei did not respond. There was nothing left for her to say.

After all, he was right. We will all eventually die, but the good ones get killed.