Kibum smoothed down Onew’s plain black gown from the shoulders one last time, fixed his hair, and stepped back to behold the sight of his lovely boyfriend clad in his almost-complete graduation ensemble.

“Wah~ Look at our darling Jinki! Isn’t he sooooooo handsome, hmm?” He smiled fondly at the older boy, feeling a rush of pride within at seeing how exceptionally good Onew looked on his graduation day.

It was early in the morning but Kibum and Onew were already up and ready for the big day ahead. Both boys have not really had a good night’s sleep; Onew being both nervous and excited about the graduation ceremony, and Kibum was of course more than happy for him. However, he stayed awake last night, lying in bed beside Onew and watching him talk about the next day until he gradually grew sleepy, also because he wasn’t sure how many more nights could be spent like this, together in each other’s arms.

“I can’t believe I’m finally graduating. Am I really doing this?” Onew said a bit anxiously, looking down at himself as if still questioning the truth of the situation.

“Yes, you are, my dear. Don’t worry now. You’re awesome, Onew-yah, I’m so proud of you.” Kibum took his boyfriend’s hands in his own and looked at him with soft eyes, his affectionate tone masking an unspoken sadness which he hoped the older boy would not detect.

“Come here, baby…” Onew pulled on their joined hands and brought Kibum closer to him. He rested his hands on Kibum’s shoulders and studied him from top to toe.

“You grew so much, Key-ah. When we first met, I remember you still had to look up at me a bit, but you’re even taller than me now!” Onew said, smiling at Kibum who, really, was just at his eye level.

“And look at you…” Kibum began, but then realized that Onew hasn’t changed too much outwardly. His hair was still long and brown like always, he hasn’t grown significantly bigger in size and his sunshine smile was as bright as the day they first met. He was, however, undeniably more rooted, more confident about himself. And of course, now that Kibum has seen more than the gentle side to Onew, all these different pieces that made up his boyfriend just seemed extra endearing to him.

“… ier than ever.” He finished with a naughty smirk and pecked Onew’s lips, earning him a light blush from the older boy.

“I am going to miss being here with you so much, you know?” Onew mumbled in Kibum’s ear when he pulled him into a hug. He could feel Onew’s gentle nuzzling of his neck, his warm breath tickling his skin.

But he was touching on the one topic that Kibum didn’t yet want to discuss at the moment. So he quickly pulled away from their embrace and pretended to be annoyed.

“Yah, pabo! Your gown is going to be all rumpled like this!” Kibum busied his hands, if only for something else to do and somewhere else to look, running them down the length of the gown to smooth it again. He bit his lips, trying to quell the unwelcomed feeling of fear that coursed through his insides.

Pushing the corners of his lips up into a wide smile, he looked up at Onew again.

“Ready?”

Onew grabbed his graduation cap off the bed and took Kibum’s hand as they exited his dorm room together.

“Let’s go.”

When the ceremony that was filled with speeches and award presentations – of which Kibum, Taemin and Onew’s parents proudly watched him go on stage to receive his Outstanding Contributions award, looking ever dashing in his graduation gown and that thing he does with his eyes – was finally over, the graduating class was ushered to the school’s foyer where there was tea reception served. The students mingled around, taking pictures with their family and friends near the main entrance of the school, where the university’s symbolic gate stood.

Taemin was so hyped up the entire time it felt as if he was the one graduating. He couldn’t stop talking about the school, and all the different activities he planned to take part in to have an ‘active university life’ as he put it. Kibum smiled at everything he said because Taemin sounded so much like himself, always energetic and never wanting to miss out on anything.

When Taemin had received the letter of acceptance for his application to SNU some weeks ago, he’d called Onew up first thing to tell him about the good news. It wasn’t a big surprise because, just like Onew, Taemin was bright and worked hard for his grades as well. Still, everyone was happy and proud of him for making it to one of Korea’s top universities. The three of them even specially met up during the break to celebrate the maknae’s acceptance.

“Oh, Jonghyun-ah, Minho!” Onew called in surprise when he saw the pair approaching him with smiles on their faces, and he began to disentangle himself from his parents’ arms.

Kibum smiled at both his friends when they came near, but only Jonghyun carried on walking towards Onew while Minho fell back and stayed beside Kibum.

“Yah, what is this, Choi Minho? Even coming to Onew’s graduation together… you guys are official now?” He turned to face the taller boy who was avoiding his eyes and smiling shyly down at his shoes. His actions only served to affirm Kibum’s question. 

Aish, so this cocky bugger is capable of being shy too? Ah, jinjja…

“When? Why didn’t you tell me, you!” Kibum began to hit Minho’s arm repeatedly while the latter yelped at the sudden attack.

“Relax, Kibum-ah! It was just yesterday! You’re the first person I told!” Minho quickly said in his defense so Kibum would stop hitting him, which he did. “Unlike you. How long were you and Jinki-hyung together before you told me again? One month?”

“You were still the first one I told. So how did it happen?” Kibum shrugged and said nonchalantly, not falling trap to Minho’s guilt trip.

“We just met up a lot over winter break and yesterday he just held my hand suddenly while we were waiting for the bus to g–”

“Wait, he asked you?” Kibum interrupted Minho in mid-sentence and asked.

“Uh… ye…ah…? Why?” The taller boy asked somewhat cautiously, probably not understanding Kibum’s reaction.

“No matter.” Kibum waved him off lightly, not intending to explain anything more. He glanced over at Jonghyun and Onew who were talking amiably, thinking about the way everything had turned out while Minho continued on about what Jonghyun did in the moment of his confession.

“What about Jessica?”  Kibum suddenly remembered the girl who was the partial reason for his breakup with Jonghyun and asked the same question as he had the first time when Minho revealed his feelings for Jonghyun to him.

Minho paused, looking at Kibum and then said, “She found someone else awhile ago, some guy called Taecyeon. She apologized to Jonghyun and all too. Everything just kind of fell into place huh?”

There’s a reason we didn’t work out. Kibum nodded in response to Minho’s question and thought.

He thought about his shameless chase for the older boy back then, how he had his breath taken away the first time he saw Jonghyun on that stage, and the way they somehow impetuously tumbled into a relationship together. Then, there came Jessica. How she was just anywhere and everywhere, endlessly tormenting him even after he had already left Jonghyun behind. 

Jonghyun had been the one to make them official as well, but Kibum just knew, could feel it, that it seemed different this time with Minho. Even though it made him a little sad to think that he wasn’t enough to be the one Jonghyun would be different for, he really wished for the best for his good friends. Moreover, the one who used to be their greatest obstacle, the root of their fights and unhappiness, just cleared herself away with completely no malice as well.

It might as well be fate. It was just fate that he didn’t last with Jonghyun.

Then again, look at where he is now. If everything had not gone wrong in such a right way, could he have eventually found his way to Onew too? Would he have just slipped by him and remained as but best friends? Kibum had no regrets for the way things turned out to be, at least.  Onew was the best thing that happened to him.

He smiled; a sincere and grateful smile from the bottom of his heart.

“I’m so happy for you, Minho-ah.” Kibum said as he patted Minho’s back and they began to walk towards their lovers. Jonghyun was talking animatedly on the phone while Onew stood beside him looking amused at the younger’s many expressions. Kibum noticed that neither Onew’s parents nor Taemin were around.

“Where are your parents and Taemin?” Kibum asked when he reached Onew’s side.

“They went to get food at the reception. Jonghyun is calling Yuri now for a band picture. It seems like so long ago since we played together… Ah, if only Joon-hyung could be here too.” Onew smiled warmly at the mention of his band members, people he had met and had fun with for a good part of his university life. A part that Kibum knows he was not a part of, but that doesn’t matter because now he is. He will be a part of Onew’s life after graduation, in their many tomorrows together and that was more than he could ask for.

“Yuri-noona said she’s over at the other end, but she’s coming over right now! Hey Kibum.” Jonghyun said when he hung up the phone, smiling as he slid his hand into Minho’s larger one.

“I heard the good news from Minho. Congrats, you canny pabos. Last long!” Kibum said, smiling and patting them both on the back. He turned to see Onew’s slightly surprised face and put his arm across his waist, leaning on him. All had certainly ended up well for everyone.

Graduation was really a busy day for Onew because all Kibum could see was his boyfriend running around having pictures taken with so many different people. There were a good number of girls who asked for a shot with Onew too, both from his level and juniors alike, people whom Onew didn’t personally know, people who probably admired him for all of his brilliance. Kibum remembered how the entire hall went wild when Onew introduced himself that first time he saw him perform on the stage.

There was a little lollop in his chest at realizing that the charismatic, cute and smart guy everyone wanted a piece of belonged to him, and only him.

“Family portrait!” Kibum clapped his hands and called out when Onew’s parents and Taemin returned.

“Kibum-hyung! You have to come in too!” Taemin said suddenly when Kibum had taken a shot for Onew and his parents, and another one with them and Taemin.

“Huh, me too? Uh…” He stuttered a bit, still not quite sure of how to react naturally under such a circumstance. Taemin, however, wasted no time in taking the camera from Kibum’s hands and quickly asking someone nearby to take a picture for them.

“Whoo~ Family portrait!” The maknae shouted, pulling a half-dazed Kibum to stand between Onew and himself.

In the moment before the shutter was pressed, Onew put his arm on Kibum’s waist and pulled him a tiny bit closer. It widened the smiled on the younger’s face.

While Kibum and Onew were huddled over the camera’s little screen to look at the picture they had just taken, somebody tapped Kibum’s shoulder from behind and he turned at the same time as Onew to see Hyoyeon.

It was the Hyoyeon he was close to and respected. The same Hyoyeon he had broken and hasn’t talked to since.

“Hey Jinki, Kibum.” She started, a warm smile on her face. Blond hair and pale skin a stark contrast with the black gown, she looked strikingly beautiful today.

“Can I?” She held her camera out to them, the smile not slipping from her face. It was the same gentle smile that Kibum was used to seeing, but somehow seemed to be veiling a kind of pain in her eyes when he looked at her now. She asked the question with an undertone of uncertainty, as if she should not have, and it broke his heart to hear it.

Onew smiled and nodded while Kibum took the camera from her. They were not so cruel as to even deny her of a picture together. In fact, Kibum couldn’t be sorry enough.

“Noona, let me.”

There was another person standing behind Hyoyeon who suddenly spoke up. He looked about Kibum’s age and though he was slightly shorter than Kibum, he was definitely better built than him. His hair was dyed a bright red and parts of an ominous looking tattoo peeked out from beneath the rolled up sleeves of his white shirt.

Kibum’s eyes trailed up his body until he met with that person’s eyes, and he was taken aback to find that guy staring right back, and not in an entirely friendly manner. He strode past Hyoyeon and took the camera roughly from Kibum’s hands.

“Mingu-ah…” Hyoyeon’s tone was soft, but it did its job as said person’s – Kibum now guessed he must be Hyoyeon’s dongsaeng – attitude softened a bit and he got ready to take their picture.

“Can I take one with you too, Kibum-ah?” Hyoyeon proceeded to ask right after thanking Onew for the picture, still smiling that heartbreaking fake smile of hers.

“M-me too?”  Kibum was surprised and shot an uncertain look at Onew. He certainly didn’t think Hyoyeon would want to remember the boy who took her light away. It almost felt like he had betrayed her, almost.

“Ne!” She said and immediately went to stand beside him.

Maybe she is getting better now. Noona is a strong person, right? She will get better. Kibum could only try to convince himself this way before smiling as brightly as he could manage into the camera.

That night, the couple lay in the bed of Onew’s dorm room for the last time. The older boy was moving out of the school’s dorm the next morning, and most of the room was already packed. There was no more timetable stuck on the wall. The desk was bare, and so was the wardrobe. Kibum felt as empty as the room looked.

Kibum willed himself to feel better. He tried to ignore the fact that from tomorrow on, his every night spent in the dorms would be by himself. They have spent time apart, each in their own homes during winter break, and honestly he hadn’t had the easiest time around. But at that time, he knew there would be a next time when he would be with Onew again, and it was a definite period of time which he could endure.

Yet now… What happens now? 

He knew that Onew is going to talk about going away and he knew he can’t run from it forever. People move on all the time and he knew too that he will eventually be perfectly alright on his own. But Kibum found himself having built a large part of his daily life and his emotional support around the older boy that it will not be easy to revert to the times when he only relied on himself.

Onew had one hand in Kibum’s hair, absently twirling the brown locks around his fingers while his other hand rested on his own tummy.

Kibum let out a soft sigh which did not go unnoticed by Onew. The hand that was playing with his hair stopped in its actions and instead went to rest on his shoulder.

“Something on your mind?” Onew asked gently, like he knew exactly what was stirring Kibum up. But he must, right? What else at this point in time could possibly be bugging him?

“What am I going to do, Onew-yah…? D’you think I should arrange with the office to shift into this room? It smells like you. And I already have the key and everything… Onew-yah!” Kibum was rattling on when he suddenly yelled Onew’s name and semi-flung himself into the older boy’s chest.

“Are you really going to leave?” Kibum whined, clinging tightly onto Onew’s torso.

He heard his boyfriend’s chuckle accompanying the rumbling of his chest.

“Aren’t you the one who told me to take the offer, Key-ah? ‘It’s better for the both of us’ and all that?” Onew said, mimicking Kibum’s tone of voice the only other time they had talked about this. Kibum looked up at his teasing tone and felt even worse than before.

Kibum does remember that he did tell Onew to go ahead and accept the job offer but that was just him trying to be rational and unselfish, looking at the bigger picture and trying to convince himself that it is for the better. Right now, however, he found himself wishing he had never said those things. He wanted exactly to be selfish and to keep Onew for himself. He didn’t want Onew going anywhere outside of the country and having to live away from him for such a long period of time.

But what’s said cannot be unsaid. He should be a supportive and selfless boyfriend to Onew. He knows he should.

“Yeah…” Kibum only managed to say before turning his face back into Onew’s chest, unconsciously tightening his hold on the older boy’s body. He honestly didn’t want to hear much more.

“Key, baby…” Onew began, shaking him lightly, but Kibum didn’t budge. “Kibummie?”

Kibum couldn’t take hearing that gentle tone calling his name in that way because it takes all the will to be strong right out of him. He sat up abruptly, eyes hot with forming tears and nose souring, and glared at Onew, who also hurriedly got up to look at him.

“What’s w–”

“Don’t! Don’t talk to me like that! Stop calling me in that way! I’m going to cry!” Kibum only just shouted before he felt his face crumple as sobs choked him. He pressed the back on his hand to his lips to stop them from trembling.

“Oh god, baby… Why are you being like this, hmm?” Onew seemed a bit shocked at first but quickly composed himself and pulled Kibum’s hand away from his face, wiping his tears away before moving himself closer to Kibum to hug him. It was even like he had expected this would happen.

Kibum could barely make sense of anything as he laid his cheek against Onew’s shoulder, and the older boy’s hand was rubbing his back in a soothing manner. Onew kept it up and pressed soft kisses to the side of Kibum’s neck until he had significantly calmed down.

“I did take the offer, but I’m not going anywhere.” Onew said when he gently pulled Kibum away from his shoulder and looked at him with earnest eyes. “I’m staying right here with you.”

Kibum’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “H-how?”

Onew smiled. He slowly turned Kibum around and settled him between his legs comfortably so he was cradling him from behind.

“Let’s just say that they really want me onboard, and we struck a deal. The company agreed to let me stay in the country.”

“So you’re not leaving?”

“I’m not leaving.” Onew answered affirmatively.

“Oh, thank god!” Kibum pulled Onew’s face towards him and kissed him. All the emotional tension he was feeling had disappeared in an instant.

“Aigoo, my silly baby.” Onew kissed him on the forehead and went back to cradling him.

“And also…” The older boy started again. “I haven’t wanted to say this until everything is nicely settled but seeing that you’re so upset– ”

“What is it?” Kibum interrupted, eager to know what Onew was being secretive about.

“I rented a place here in Seoul, about 20 minutes away from the school. And I just wanted to ask… if you’d like to move in with me?”

Everything felt unreal. First, Onew said that he wasn’t going to leave the country after all. Then, he asked Kibum to move in with him.

He almost screamed “Yes!” before he had the better sense to think first. It really didn’t make sense for him to move away from the school with another two years to finish, even though it means having more time with his boyfriend. Where was he going to get the money? Onew probably wouldn’t expect him to share the rent but obviously Kibum can’t and won’t just live off of him. What would his father think if Kibum told him about moving in with his boyfriend? What if happened and they didn’t last? It did seem too fast to do that when they were only a few months into the relationship. There were just too many considerations in the way.

Kibum opened his mouth, wondering how best to put it to Onew without sounding too practical, but he was stopped by a finger on his lips.

“Okay, I know what you want to say. It’s fine really, I thought of a lot of things as well, but I was just trying my luck.” Onew shrugged and smiled to show that he understood Kibum’s decision, and the younger was relieved that they felt the same way. 

“I’ll crash the place on weekends though, so you better not have other girls over, and we can still meet for dinner on some nights right?” Kibum said, narrowing his eyes at Onew playfully, to which the older boy laughed.

“You and your nonsense about the girls.” Onew pinched his cheeks lightly and leaned in to kiss him, then slid down to lie beside him again.

“Oh… Onew-yah…” Kibum suddenly said, remembering something. “That guy… with Hyoyeon-noona today, is her…?”

Onew looked a bit surprised at the sudden mention of the guy. “That’s her dongsaeng, Mingu. Why?”

“D’you think… Uhm. I don’t know if this sounds weird but he looks like he hates me.” Kibum said. He remembered that look on the guy’s face was indeed hostile, and for a short while he had toyed with the idea that maybe he knew something about their love triangle of sorts.

“Oh, don’t think too much about it. It’s just the way he looks… Remember I told you about Hyoyeon’s family? That time when her father lost her job and her home wasn’t such a nice place to be in?” Onew started to explain and Kibum nodded.

“That time, her brother stayed out of the house everyday, if only for the sake of avoiding their parents’ quarrels or to seek attention, we don’t really know. He soon began to join bad company, and got into trouble with the law a lot.”

“Is he a gangster? Does he beat people up?” Kibum suddenly asked, remembering the tattoo and his fearful aura. He looked like he could break Kibum’s limps if he wanted to.

“… he’s not really like that much now, Key-ah. But you know you can never really break away from those people once you were a part of them. He used to be a nice boy, really. But well, at least he still listens to Hyoyeon now…” Onew shrugged.

“He looks scary.”

“He is.” Onew said but didn’t elaborate any further.

“So when are you moving in?” Kibum decided to change the topic because talking about that Mingu guy gave him the creeps.

“Next week. I feel so old now, Key-ah, I have to be a responsible working adult! I wish I could just be a childish kid forever.” Onew said and pressed his nose into Kibum’s collarbone.

“You can when you’re with me.” Kibum let him snuggle closer to his side and put his arms around Onew’s waist. “You’re always a little baby to me.”

***

Jinki didn’t tell Key the entire truth.

The truth was that he had to give up the position originally offered to him in order to stay in the country. It was a big sacrifice that his parents were initially somewhat skeptical about.

The original position was obviously higher up the ranks, and it paid slightly better. Jinki should count himself lucky, though, that the corporation actually didn’t just dismiss him immediately the moment he tried to talk terms with them. The people made it clear that while they do really appreciate Jinki’s capabilities, it doesn’t mean it was going to grant him whatever he wanted, and there were countless other people who are eligible for the job as well. So he had to give up something in exchange for another.

Foolish as he know others might think he is if they learnt about it, he really didn’t regret making such a decision. He didn’t mind as long as he doesn’t have to move away from his family and Key. He knew too, that Key wasn’t going to be too happy if he found out what Jinki had given up for him, but he didn’t have to know right now.

Key had classes the day Jinki moved into the new place. It wasn’t an overly spacious apartment, but since he lived alone, it wasn’t really a problem. With much help from his parents, he managed to make the place feel somewhat homely. When Key dropped by later that night to have a look at the place, he absolutely loved it.

Jinki woke up to the wafting scent of something nice cooking and a song playing that his brain couldn’t register in its groggy state. His head was heavy and he had a stiff neck from falling asleep at his work desk the last night. However, the curtains were drawn and there was a blanket covering him from the shoulders. The papers that were left spread out messily in front of him on the desk the night before were neatly stacked too.

“Umma?” Jinki called out, ruffling his messy hair and wondering why his mother would drop by without informing him first. He reached for his phone on the desk after trying to stretch out the tight muscles all over his body, thankful that it was finally Saturday again. It was almost eleven in the morning, and Key hasn’t called nor texted him since the last night.

Jinki just hoped he wasn’t upset about their cancelled plans again.

The problem is, trying to meet up with Key wasn’t as easy as Jinki had thought it would be. It was only the second week into his job and he was flooded with lots of paperwork to go through on top of having to familiarize with his job scope as well as the Korean branch’s operations. He had been so busy that he had to cancel dinner plans with his boyfriend one too many times, last night inclusive. Jinki could tell that Key was a little disappointed but he understandingly left the older boy to his work, though he did promise that he will bring Key out for a nice meal the next day.

“Umma, when did you–” Having decided that he shall give his boyfriend a call after he’d freshened up, Jinki walked out of his room and got a pleasant surprise because the person standing in front of the stove was not his mother.

It was Key.

“Baby! You’re up!” The younger boy stopped singing to the song – that Jinki now recognized was that funny song called Roly Poly or something – and turned around when he heard Jinki’s voice, beaming widely at him.

Jinki could barely get a gasp out of him because he was too happy. Just seeing Key’s face was enough to sweep all the fatigue away from his mind. If he could wake up to this every morning, he didn’t mind having to slog like an overly stressed-out high school student every night.

“Surprise? Breakfast will be ready soon, now go wash up. Bballi!” Key chuckled seeing Jinki’s expression and said.

Without saying anything, Jinki crossed the small kitchen and wrapped his arms around Key.

“Just… just let me stay like this for a bit. Please.” He whispered weakly, breathing in Key’s comforting and sweet scent, feeling more at ease than he had in the last two weeks. He felt the younger boy’s arms go around him tightly, rubbing his back gently.

“Onew-yah… I’d love to keep hugging you like that but the food is going to burn okay? Now go wash up and we’ll have breakfast. We have all day to cuddle.” Key chuckled lightly and whispered back to him.

Upon hearing that, Jinki quickly let go and shuffled off to the bathroom. What a nice surprise it was from Key, Jinki thought he must be the most thoughtful boyfriend ever.

When he came back out to the living room, the table was already set and Key was flicking through the channels on the TV, looking for something interesting to watch. Jinki sneaked up from behind him and s his arms around Key’s waist.

“How do you know where everything is?” Jinki asked as he looked at his boyfriend.

“Because I’m smart.” Key answered, smiling. Jinki couldn’t resist pecking his cheek once before taking his seat next to his boyfriend.

“How is it?” Key asked as Jinki dug in, taking his first mouthful and almost melting in his seat. He’d been having a lot of cheap bakery bread for breakfast and ty takeout food for the other meals. Sometimes he was so busy that he’d even forget to eat dinner. The sight of actual, proper cooked food in front of him was too good.

“Wow, I didn’t know you can cook, Key-ah! And scrambled eggs, my favourite! It tastes just like my umma’s!” Jinki said as he continued to eat voraciously.

“Well actually, I learnt this from eomeonim, that day I stayed over at your place.” Key laughed, picking up the fork and beginning to eat as well. “She told me you love to have scrambled eggs for breakfast and taught me how to scramble it to perfection – Jinki style.” He seemed really pleased with himself.

“Oh, thank god! I will never have to starve or eat ty food anymore! My boyfriend is amazing!” Jinki said dramatically with a touched expression that made Key laugh more.

“Yah! I’m not going to do all your cooking and cleaning okay! I’m not your maid...” The younger boy made a face, but he was still smiling.

“Yes, I know, I know. You’re my baby okay, and all you have to do is just be babied by me.” Jinki pulled Key into his lap and rested his head against the younger’s shoulder. He felt his boyfriend relaxing into his arms and his hair gently.

“What do you want to do today? D’you want to stay in and just relax? You seem horribly overworked Onew-yah…” Key pulled Jinki away from himself and started to examine his face, his voice laced with concern. “Look at you. Don’t work so hard...” His hands were caressing Jinki’s face and a small pout hung on his own.

Jinki took Key’s hands in both of his and smiled at his sweet love. “No, let’s go out! The weather looks good today, and I’m so tired of staying in.”

“Really? You want to?” Key’s face lit up as he asked.

“Yes, I want to! Now let’s finish up the food and go get ready!” Jinki ruffled his hair. If every weekend could be as simple and blissful as today, he might just be able to pull through the hellish weekdays.

***

“…I have a huge case to handle for Monday, so not this weekend, ya?” Onew’s voice coming from the other end of the line sounded apologetic.

“But baby, I only see you once a week now…” Kibum whined. It’s not that he didn’t want to be understanding and let Onew get on with his work, but he just couldn’t help it. As the weeks went on, his boyfriend had been so buried in work that he was, consciously or not, neglecting him more and more and it didn’t feel good at all.

There was a deep sigh from the older boy.

“I know, Key, I’m sorry. But I really can’t this weekend. I’ll make it up to you okay, promise.” Onew said, but he sounded really distracted this time. Kibum knew he should stop trying to push it and let things go. Onew sounded tensed enough as it is already.

“Alright. Please don’t work too hard, Onew-yah, make sure you eat proper meals and sleep enough okay? I’ll see you soon.” Kibum started to nag at his boyfriend.

He was horrified when he found out the slump-ish lifestyle Onew led when he went to his place the last weekend and found him on the bed holding his stomach in pain, too weak to move. His kitchen cupboards and refrigerator were also void of ingredients he could use to make anything edible. The older boy later admitted that he often forgot to eat his meals because he’s too busy or tired, and he seemed to have developed a gastric problem because of that. Kibum couldn’t stop nagging at him to eat properly since then, because it really freaked him out to see Onew in that kind of pain. How was it that he’s already twenty-two and he still can’t take care of himself?!

“Arasso. I’m sorry about this baby, I love you.” Onew chuckled a bit at his nagging and said.

“Love you too.” Kibum said and hung up the phone. He didn’t respond directly to Onew’s apology because what was he supposed to say, really? He didn’t feel okay. It wasn’t fine. Not really.

He had pushed a project meeting to another day just so his weekend would be free to spend with Onew, and now, this. The ‘meet for dinner on some nights’ that they had talked about at the start never happened, not even once and okay, strictly speaking it wasn’t always Onew’s fault. Kibum’s commitments at school were getting heavy once again and he was having a hard time juggling them all.

He was having a hard time being on his own so much with all the stress piling up.

Kibum lay in his bed, staring blankly at his phone’s idle screen. Then he dialed Minho’s number and pressed the phone to his ear, waiting for the call to connect.

“Yeoboseyo?” Minho’s deep voice broke the dial tone after several rings.

“Minho-ah, it’s Kibum. Uhm… Are you free tomorrow?” Kibum asked, crossing his fingers.

“It’s Kibum.” Kibum heard Minho mumble in the background, and suddenly thought that he must be together with Jonghyun at the moment. “Er… I guess–” Minho started to say with hesitation in his voice but Kibum stopped him mid-sentence.

“Oh, Minho-ah, it’s okay. I just remembered I have something to attend to. Sorry to disturb!” He said cheerfully into the phone and hung up before Minho could respond. He knew that Minho would try to rearrange his plans to accommodate him. Minho knew he was a little out of balance with Onew away and did his best to accompany Kibum, but he didn’t want to disrupt his plans more.

I need to learn to get used to this, Kibum thought. I have to stop relying on everyone. Everybody has their own lives to live and so do I. Come on Kibum-ssi, Onew is working hard for you too. Fighting!

Kibum fell asleep that night feeling a little afraid and a little upset. He was afraid of where things were headed, but decided he will just take things as they come. Hugging the bolster tightly to himself, he imagined it was Onew in his arms instead. He thought of the many nights they spent together, the safety and warmth he felt and psycho-ed himself to sleep imagining that it was one of those nights.

At this time, the only part of Onew he still had with him was in his imagination and memories.

A.N.: Wow I managed to update just before the one month mark, this is worth a cheer, LOL! Did I surprise you guys? Jinki isn't leaving! I was never intending to make him leave btw :) But apparently, even staying in the country has its challenges for the couple that is slowly surfacing. And oh yeah, I made Jongho together. Not too much details because I'm not going to be good at writing it, sorry. 

So let the angst begin! Oh man, there's going to be so much angst from now on that I'm getting excited (le sadistic author). I'll be sticking to shorter updates like this one too because the last chapter of 14k words was a monstrosity to both write and read. I think I worn people out with it tbh, lol. This one was 6k btw. 

I'm going to start to be busy with work and university too in the next month, but I will still try my best to update within a month. In any case if I happen to take longer (which I know I do a lot), please bear with me! 

Okay it's 2.30am now and I need to get up in 3.5 hours to go to my university. Please comment/subscribe/ just give me some love because... well just because HAHA. You can try to guess what's going to happen next ;) 

For readers of Over It: Gosh, I am so sorry but you guys might have to wait a bit for the update okay? I'm going to start to work 12-hour shifts from Monday to Friday so I will try my best to write when I can. Please be patient with me :) 

xoxo!