Chapter 15 “Keeping a Secret”



“Hyung…” Changmin could feel his own tears on his cheek. He was dead worried but relief that Jaejoong was not in so much pain anymore.

“Min…don’t…tell…others…” Jaejoong spoke as the maknae got his hyung on the bed,” Please…”

“But they need to know…” Changmin spoke, he couldn’t bear the secret for himself; it was too much.

“Don’t…It just will make they worried and they…won’t be able to concentrate for the concert…please…” Jaejoong was holding Changmin’s hand, trying to convince him.

“Why?” Changmin asked as he covered the oldest with warm blanket,” Why you never tell us?”

“I told you the reason already,” Jaejoong smiled weakly,” Please…this concert is my final wish…”

“Hyung, don’t ever say that!” Changmin didn’t realize he was shouting,” Please…”

“I know…you’re a genius, Changmin ah,” Jaejoong spoke,” I know you would be the one who discover about my sickness first. That is why please…It’s for all of us…”

Changmin couldn’t hate Jaejoong for his decision, he knew he would do the same if he was in the same boat, he nodded.

“Thanks…I think I’ll sleep for a while, wake me up when we need to leave, OK?” Jaejoong said as he closed his eyes. The maknae couldn’t help but hold Jaejoong’s hand tightly; he didn’t want to lose his ‘Umma’. He never wanted such a thing.

---


“I’ve check the light and sound system,” Yoochun spoke.

“The stage and other things also already taken care by the staff,” Junsu said with excitement,” Now, we can start our rehearsal!”

“Well then, get into your position,” Yunho commanded.

Changmin did as he had been told but couldn’t help but to stared at their oldest one. Jaejoong seemed fine though just a bit pale.

“Hyung…” Changmin called.

“I’m fine. Just concentrate on the dance move, OK?” Jaejoong reassured, trying to look strong. He knew his body wouldn’t endure much longer but he wouldn’t let the sickness beat him. He would fight with all his strength.

It took them around five hours to finish and they decided to go for some supper after that. But first of all, they needed to wash themselves. The shower room was kind of comfortable, Junsu thought. He couldn’t wait to get his natto for supper.

“Hyung, what about some ramen?” Yoochun suggested.

“I’m fine with it,” Yunho spoke,” I think the manager told me there is a delicious ramen stand near by...They also have some natto…”

“Let’s go there!” Junsu cheered.

“I think I’ll pass,” Jaejoong spoke. The other might not realize it but the maknae did, Jaejoong’s eyes were kind of dark, like when he had his insomnia; but this time, it was definitely not insomnia.

“Me too, I’m exhausted,” Changmin spoke.

“Eh? Really?” Yunho was kind of surprised; he thought the five of them would have some time together,” OK then, get some good sleep, OK?”

Jaejoong smiled to the leader-sshi, some YunJae’s signal, they said. After done with the shower, they parted. Jaejoong and Changmin decided to use taxi because Yunho, Junsu, Yoochun, and the other staff would be using the van.

“Hyung, are you OK?” Changmin finally asked when they’re alone, inside the taxi.

“My head is killing me…” Jaejoong said the truth.

“Do you take the meds?” Changmin asked.

“Already did, didn’t help much though…” Jaejoong leaned over Changmin’s shoulder. On old days, he would get smack because the maknae didn’t like to be touched by guys, even the members but today was different.

“Thank you…Changmin ah,” Jaejoong smiled as he drifted to his slumber. Changmin nodded.

When they got into the hotel, Changmin managed to get Jaejoong to their room without waking him. It was hard work though. After making sure the door was locked and the window was shut, Changmin crashed his body to the bed and fell asleep instantly. They’re too exhausted.

---


The next morning, Jaejoong felt a bit better. Just a bit though. After taking a good bubble bath, he went to get his breakfast with all s. They decided to eat at the hotel restaurant.

“How’s your sleep?” Yunho asked.

“I sleep like a log. What about you guys?” Jaejoong stated as he ate his omelet.

“I sleep well until Junsu kicked me on four o’clock in the morning…” Yoochun answered.

“But I said sorry already,” Junsu pouted. The rest ended up laughing.

“Hyung deul, can we have a photo together?” Changmin suddenly suggested; Jaejoong knew why.

“Of course,” Jae answered,” It has been a long time since we have a photo together.”

Yunho called one of the waitresses and asked him to take a photo for them. Yunho and Jaejoong sat next to each other as Changmin sat between them. Yoochun and Junsu were fooling around behind. It was a perfect Dong Bang family scene.

“Wow, look at Junsu’s face!” Yoochun pointed.

“Yaa! It’s your fault for pulling my cheek,” Junsu stated.

“You look cute though, Junchan,” Jaejoong teased.

“I can’t believe where Changmin’s eyes were…” Yunho commented.

“What? What’s wrong with my eyes?” the maknae was worried.

“See…He didn’t look at the camera but at his food on the table!” Yunho spoke, the rest ended up teasing the maknae. But the truth wasn’t that simple. Changmin was sad and burdened with the fact he was the only one knew about Jae’s sickness. He wanted to do something to help but he didn’t know what. That why he looked down to prevent from tearing up.

---


“I’ve double check everything,” Yunho stated. They have been doing their last check up and rehearsal before the concert for the last 10 hours. The concert would take place tomorrow evening.

“Well, I think we also already remembered the entire dance steps,” Junsu spoke.

“So, can we go home now?” Yoochun asked,” I’m tired…”

“What time is it?” the maknae asked.

“Almost ten o’clock…” Jaejoong replied,” I guess we better hurry up and get some rest…Tomorrow is a big day for us…”

“Totally agree with that,” Yunho spoke. So the five men took quick shower and then went back to the hotel. After having some supper together, they went to sleep.

---


“Hey,” a voice echoed inside a quiet, silent, and dark park,” How’s your doing?”

“Bad…I guess,” another man who sat on the bench spoke,”The medicine and painkillers no longer work, Jungmin ah…”

“Jae, you still can have the surgery now to preven---“

“I don’t want to…” Jaejoong spoke,” At least not until I can finish the concert…The concert is my last wish, Jungmin ah…”

“But by doing the surgery you can---“

“I thought he have discussed it,” Jaejoong finally spoke as he got up,” Can we just go for a walk?”

“Fine,” Jungmin knew he wouldn’t change Jaejoong’s mind,” Where do you want to go? We can go with my car…”

“Hmm, a place where all of it started…here, in Japan…” Jaejoong smiled.

“Can you be more specific, Jae?” Jungmin asked.

“Budokan…I want to see Budokan stage,” Jaejoong spoke,” Can we go there?”

Bodukan stage was the stage where Tohoshinki got their turning point and conquered the Japanese market. It was a wish that finally granted for them, Jungmin knew.

“Of course…” Jungmin said,” But won’t the others curious that you’re missing?”

“Yunho, Yoochun, and Junsu got their own room. They won’t know I’m missing. Changmin…he already knew about my sickness and I gave him a note, he won’t do anything reckless, I guess…” Jaejoong spoke as they got into the car.

“Everything just happened according to your plan, didn’t it?” Jungmin shook his head.

“Yeah, I guess I’m quite a good planner?” Jaejoong smiled.

“It would be a huge shock to them when they know everything that happened to you, Jae,” Jungmin reminded,” Not only the sickness but the drugs…”

“I know, can we talk about something else?” Jaejoong didn’t like where the conversation going. It just made him remembered how fool he was; he just couldn’t help it.

“Fine.”