Oneshot for JaewonONE! I'm so so so sorry for the delay, my laptop died at long last TTTT. Here we have our first (i think...) slight-angst one shot! Enjoy some confusing Kookie xD

Disclaimer: I'm exhausted and got so confused during this longass update that it probably isn't great. Forgive me if it makes no sense D'x 

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The familiar scent of your boyfriends cologne hit you as soon as you opened the door. Unlocked, just as he said when you phone him to come over. It was typical of him; Jungkook didn't seem to worry about much nowadays... which was why you were here.

He wasn't curious when you said you wanted to talk, disinterested even. It only assured you more that there were problems.

It had been a stressful process and you thought endlessly about this, but you really couldn't take it any more.

Up to now, his struggle with emotions was manageable, as you always reassured yourself he did care, even if he wasn't good at showing it. After all, it was his first committed relationship and he was lost. But nothing ever changed.

Your friends said you were incompatible. For you, it was less complicated. You didn't care how it looked, or seemed or what any one thought. You cared about how you felt, how your boyfriend felt.

But... You just didn't know how he felt. After all, he never showed you.

As if supporting your doubts, the passed few weeks he had become colder, not even taking notice of you, and leading up to yesterday when it all got so much worse: you finally told him you loved. You knew it was true and had no reservations saying it, and a while ago you knew he felt the same; you wouldn't need to hear it. But as you weren't sure of anything any more, you found you wanted to hear it.

But he hadn't said a word.

That left you to awkwardly see yourself out as he stayed immersed in whatever was more important than you. 

You hadn't slept, simply dreading the next morning. It had come too soon. Today was your anniversary. You had at least expected him to call or turn up in the morning and you weren't sure you were ready to see him...

Turns out you needn't have worried; he hadn't done so much as sent you a text. And in that moment, it was too much. Maybe there was more, maybe you knew somewhere that this was real. But he had crossed the line.

It was with this resolution that you closed the door behind you, not bothering to slip off your shoes as you gnawed your lip, looking around the room.

"Jungkook?"

Just saying his name stung your heart, as you wondered what you would be to him when you left.

"I'm here!" you called, in an attempt to drownout your thoughts, pausing to listen. But there wasn't a sound; it was eerily quiet.

Hesitantly, you ventured further into his apartment.

Even such a simple move was a mistake. As you walked further and further in, everything that had happened here began to hit you. You had made this your own with him; you had practically moved in, your clothes and belongings scattered everywhere.

Focus... but he wasn't here, it was clear.

Just as you were about to surrender, your eyes fell on the photoframe on the table. It seemed you couldn't stop yourself from walking towards it, lifting it to inspect the picture. It was the only photo in the house, one you had framed and presented to him for your 100th day anniversary. You both looked happy in the photo, and you longed to feel it again.

He didn't comment on the gift, and you remembered your heart falling. But the next time you had visited, it was on the centre table.

Even such a small gesture had made you smile.

Your eyes strayed from the photo, planning to call him or text, but before you could do so something caught your eye.

Was that there before?

The soft pink envelope face down on the table put all your thoughts on hold as you squinted at it -  a misplaced object on the otherwise spotless surface.

Pink?

Placing the photoframe down, you reached for it. You scanned the back, turning it round in your hands. Your eyes widened instantly as the letters on the front jumped out to you.

It was addressed to you.

"He left a note?" you murmured, trying to recall a time he had done so. He would've texted; who left a note nowadays?

You scanned the familiar cursive writing across the front, before opening it and sliding your finger into the envelope, pulling out the contents. The pale pink card inside was blank aside from a few words written in bold black ink. 

A few numbers were written at the top, but you instantly looked to the writing.

"The moment I first saw you

With short hair and pretty clothes"

Huh?

But that was all. You looked back up at the numbers in confusion, wondering what it was supposed to mean. You felt you were missing something as you mouthed the numbers several times willing yourself to understand before finally surrendering and focusing on the words.

"The moment I first saw you..."

A wave of understanding hit you as your eyes flew back to the numbers.

It was a date. 

The day Jungkook and you first met. The memory was a fond one, and the corner of your lips pulled up as your eyes went up to the date that even you hadn't recalled.

He remembers...?

It was safe to say he had your attention as your gaze instantly fell back to the note.  The words were odd somehow, fragmented. But there was nothing else. Frowning, you searched the front, rereading the words. It was obvious he was trying to tell you something, and it wasn't that he had popped out for groceries. You flipped the card around in a final effort, pausing as you finally found what you were looking for.

'See you there.'

It was three simple words, but it sent a rush of anticipation to you.

He wants me to meet him there... but why?

You bit your lip as you looked over the card, taking time to recover from the initial shock. He hadn't done this before. The question in your mind was simple, but complicated all the same.

Do I give him this chance?

He was waiting for you where you first met, but you humoring him?

You were tired. Tired from the stress, the crying. But this threw you off. The curiosity to see what he was up to won. Wasn't this exactly what you had hoped for? You wouldn't know unless you went.

It was never really an option.

* * * *

It had been more than unexpected when you officially met. You had mutual friends and at the end of a long day out the lot of you had somehow ended up in a playground. Despite not being close, you were apparently the only two normal ones, who hung back as your friends wreaked havoc in a kids playground. And sometime in, you decided to go with it.

As your friends had fun, he had stolen your attention as you had his. You still remembered his shy smile, his quiet tone, his charisma. It was almost addictive. You talked all afternoon, mutual interests and matching personalities erasing any awkwardness, as the two of you swung together on the kids swing set. You probably looked ridiculous, but it didn't matter; that was the start of you falling. You knew he was special and so did your friends apparently, as when you eventually remembered to look for them, you found they had left you two alone.

Reaching the playground, you took a moment to glance around. It was only vaguely familiar, and you praised him for even remembering; kids rushed around, giggling and cheering as their parents nattered tiredly. You smiled at a cute girl with pigtails who rushed passed you, glancing at you momentarily as she played tag.

You wasted no more time when your eyes fell on the swing set; you were sure you knew why he brought you here.

So you were disappointed as you saw it empty. Glancing left and right, you pushed a stray strand of hair away as you wondered if you misinterpretted his note. You were sure he'd be here.

Were you early? Slouching down on the familiar swing you sighed, but you barely sat before jumping up again. Something was on the seat.

Your hope returned as you set your eyes on the familiar pink card.

Another one?

This one was stuck down, and your heart raced as you reached for it, half dazed as you pushed aside everything else. This was different, and you almost doubted it's authenticity. 

But sure enough, there was another date, and this time you didn't need to check the hint to know. It was the day of his confession...

'I don’t know why my heart is like this
I only think of you always'

The words were embedded in your mind since the day and you let the sweet memory wash over you.

The two of you were at a garden, hanging out. It wasn't uncommon, after you clicked you spent a lot of time together, so when he called you out, you hadn't thought anything suspicious. When you had arrived he had stammered and stuttered, only having a burst of confidence when you demanded to know what was going on... after which he marched towards you and kissed you without hesitation

It was only after this that he communicated, telling you that he felt different - that he couldn't stop thinking about you but he didn't understand his heart. It was the most adorable confession and yet the boldest.

Your hand lingered over your lips as you remembered his sweet words. His confession had startled you, but you knew how you felt as soon as his lips touched yours. He was embarassed and a mess, but he handled it just like everything else, and he didn't give up.

Was it wrong that these me