It’s been three weeks now, since we’ve sent away our dear friend. I’ve cried every night. In every break. Junsu’s coming less by to visit me. Can’t blame him… He’s to recover. Changmin’s getting ready for his enlistment. He’s several weeks left until coming here. The whole military base seems empty without Yoochun. We didn’t cross each other’s ways that often here, but I knew that he walked around on the same grounds. But I won’t hear his footsteps anymore. When I’m back from military, there’ll be no more Yoochun to cook for. No one to say “Y”, when we’re introducing us. There’ll be no more JYJ, at least not like it used to be. We’re going to continue without him… but for him.

“Yah… can you still smell his scent?”, Yunho’s asking me and taking me out of my thoughts.

The new commander, a very rough and strict person, had a meeting with the organizers and they managed to put Yunho and me in the same sleeping room. Changmin’s going to come here too when he’s enlisted. Yoochun’s bed’s still empty and it’ll stay like this as long as we’re in the military. I’m sleeping above his bed and yeah, I can still smell his scent. The bed above Yunho’s empty too. The nameless roommate’s been away for too long. We haven’t seen him once since the parkour. I wonder what happened to him… We told the police, that he might be connected to the death case of the old commander, but there’s no evidence.

Every second evening, a psychologist is talking to us. No wait…, we’re the ones who talk. She’s just listening. Good thing, she’s to keep everything down.

I’m straightening myself and climbing down my bunk bed. Yunho’s lying on his blanket, his arms crossed on his neck. He’s keeping his eyes focused on the mattress above him and knocking his foot against it.

I’m silently approaching him and crawling on his bed, next to him. He’s automatically making room for me and taking me into his arms. I’m putting my arm around his body and leaning my head on his chest. His cheek’s touching my hair. He’s caressing my arm with his thumb and sighing. He’s aware that I’m going to cry again. At least, there’s someone who’s making me feel a tiny little bit better. Therefore…, I’m very thankful to the new commander.

Yunho’s starting to hum a melody, a calming one, as I’m starting to sob. His voice’s trembling. He’s hurt too, but he’s trying to keep it down, but at last he’s bursting out crying. There we’re lying now. Sobbing and crying. Thinking about Yoochun.

“He… he’s in heaven, right?”, I’m asking Yunho and tightening my grip on his belly.

He’s nodding silently and kissing my hair.

“He’s by his father… and I believe he’s watching us.”, he’s answering and kissing my hair again.

Yunho and I thought about breaking up… Or at least, about not to continue our love. But we couldn’t. Yoochun put himself in big trouble. He died… because of us. We can’t throw this away. We can’t waste his effort.

“Yoochun!”, I’m shouting out of the blue with a slight smile on my face, “We love you!”

Then suddenly the door of our room opens widely and the long-lost roommate’s walking in with heavy steps. We’re straightening ourselves and immediately letting go of each other. His uniform’s worn out. The nameless guy’s looking at us with a tired glance. He’s been beaten up. His whole body is covered with blood and bruises. He’s stumbling and leaning on the closed door, while wiping off the blood, that’s running from his mouth.

“Yah! What happened?!”, Yunho’s shouting and getting up to hold him.

Even if he hates him, he’s still a good person. That’s my Yunho…

Our roommate’s breathing heavily and looking at us with an exhausted expression. Then he’s holding up something, that we both recognize instantly.

It’s Yoochun’s military dog-tag. But why’s he owning it?

“Do… do you feel… his presence?”, he’s asking us and gasping for air.

Yunho’s pushing him away softly and ripping the dog-tag out of his hand.

“Where did you get this from?!”, he’s suddenly shouting at our roommate in total rage.

I’m getting up and walking up towards Yunho, to hold him back. There he goes again, my angry beloved one...

“Don’t you feel… his presence…?”, our roommate’s asking us again and then fainting.

What’s going on? Is he seeing ghosts? Is he trying to tell us something? Why is he covered in blood and bruises? What the hell happened?

I’m holding him and asking Yunho to help me put him onto his bed. Yunho’s hesitating, since he doesn’t want our roommate to lie on his precious bed. But finally, he’s giving in and helping me carry him onto the bed.

I’m taking Yoochun’s dog-tag from Yunho and pressing it against my chest. I’m closing my eyes, but there’s no Yoochun I can sense. I’m pressing harder… but there’s no use. I end up crying again. Then Yunho’s hugging me and whispering some comforting words with his calm voice.

“Yoochun’s… waiting for you…”, our roommate’s interrupting us, as he’s come to his senses again, “You’ll meet him soon… I promise…”

Then he’s falling asleep. He’s breathing still heavily and struggling with all his pain. I’m worried that he’d die, but after hearing his words, Yunho and I are exchanging long overstrained glances. We’re both confused and thinking the same things.

What’s he talking about? Is he telling us, that we’re going to die soon? Or… is it Yoochun, who never died in first place?

What’s going on?!

We’re waiting for our roommate to wake up. It’s late in the evening already, but we can’t sleep now. We need to know what he was trying to tell us. His words keep appearing in our heads.

“Are… are we going to die?”, I’m asking Yunho and looking at him very scared of the thought.

He’s putting his hand on my shoulder and shaking his head confidently.

“I’m not going to let anyone touch you!”, he’s telling me and then pressing me against his chest, “Not even one of your single hairs!”

I’m