One month later…

“Sarang, go! Go to catch the ball.” Lee So Won shouted as she threw the ball and the huge golden retriever ran quickly to chase for the toy. So Won laughed heartily before she turned around and ran over to the beautiful woman who was sitting on the swing

“Eomma…” So Won took a seat on the swing and smiled sweetly. “Is eomma tired? Do you want to go inside and rest?” She asked.

Shin Hye let out a soft smile as she lifted her hand to tuck a strand of So Won’s hair behind her ear. She her forehead gently and wiped the beads of sweat off. “I’m not tired.” She pulled So Won’s towards her and embraced her in her arms. But then, So Won quickly pulled away from her as she placed her tiny hand at the side of Shin Hye’s abdomen and looked at Shin Hye worriedly. “Don’t hug So Won like that. It will hurt eomma’s wound.”

Shin Hye chuckled softly before she took her hand, ignoring her and pulled her into her arms again. “Silly girl. Eomma’s wound is almost recover now. It was already a month since the surgery and Doctor Song said eomma is recovering very well. Most importantly, eomma have a very good nurse at home.”

So Won pulled back slightly and looked at her in confusion. “Nurse?”

Shin Hye pinched her nose softly. “So Won is my nurse. You helped eomma to clean the wound every night and take good care of me. You are eomma’s personal nurse at home.”

So Won smiled. “I promised appa that I will take care of you when he is working in the office. I also promised Yoon Suh eomma that I will take care of you before she went back to US with Geun Suk appa. I have to be a good girl and take good care of eomma.”

Shin Hye looked at her with a loving gaze as she her cheek gently. “Do you miss Yoon Suh eomma? Do you want to go US and stay with them there?”

Without even thinking, So Won shook her head fiercely. “I don’t miss Yoon Suh eomma. I know she is happy because she has Geun Suk appa and baby Ji Hoon now. And So Won is happy because I have eomma and appa. So Won want to stay with eomma and appa forever. Eomma have to listen to Doctor Song and recover from the bad cancer. Arasso?”

Shin Hye smiled again. “Eomma will be admitted into the hospital tomorrow. Eomma will have to take a lot of medicines, a lot of injections and eomma will be very ill and weak. Will So Won be scared if eomma lose all her hair, become very thin and look very ugly?”

So Won shook her head vigorously. “Of course not. Even if eomma lose all the hair or become very thin, you will always look pretty. Eomma don’t be scared. So Won and appa will take care of you. Appa will stay in the hospital with eomma at night and So Won promise to be a good girl at home. I will go to the hospital to visit eomma every day after school. After few months, eomma will come home healthily.”

“Hmmm…” Shin Hye nodded. “Eomma will stay strong in the hospital and So Won have to study hard and become a successful lawyer like eomma, arasso?”

So Won nodded too. “So Won not only want to be a successful lawyer like eomma. So Won also want to find a good husband and marry to him like eomma and appa.”

Shin Hye laughed softly. “If your appa hear that, he will be jealous again.”

So Won giggled and just when she wanted to talk again, she saw her father walking quietly towards them. She parted her lips wanted to call him but she quickly pursed her lips back together when Min Ho place his index finger against his lips, signalling her to be quiet. So Won winked at him and smiled. She then turned back to her mother and kissed her cheek. “Eomma, I’ll go to play with Sarang. You sit here and rest, okay?”

Shin Hye smiled at her. “Okay.”

After So Won got down off the swing and ran towards Sarang, Min Ho slowly approached Shin Hye from behind and his lips curled up in a wide smile when she gasped, startled by him. He stood behind the swing, lowered down himself and wrapped his arms around her shoulder from behind. His hand was holding a stalk of red rose.

“How’s my wife today?” He whispered into her ear.

Shin Hye pouted her lips as she turned slightly to the side and glared playfully at her husband. “You almost give me a heart attack.”

Min Ho chuckled as he leaned closer and put the rose into her hand. “Still remember the meaning of one stalk of red rose?” He asked softly into her ear. “It means I love you.” He whispered seductively. “I miss you, Mrs Lee.”

Shin Hye smiled sweetly, looking at the rose. “I’m fine and I miss you too, Mr Lee.” She pulled back slightly and looked into his eyes. “How’s my husband today?” She asked back the same question he asked her.

Min Ho sighed deeply before he pulled away from her, walked to the front and sit on the swing beside his wife. He placed his arm around her shoulder, bringing her closer to him. “Meeting, meeting and meeting. But I’m glad that today is my last day before my holiday started tomorrow.” He said as he buried his nose in her hair, inhaled in her sweet scent.

“You are a bad boss. You neglected your company because of me.” Shin Hye said as she played with the rose in her hands.

Min Ho grinned. “I have a lot of very good staffs in my company. Even I was not there all the time, the sales keep increasing and the money keeps flying in.”

“Tsssk…” Shin Hye scoffed at him. “I’ll remember that and make sure you get me a big birthday present next year.”

Min Ho tilted her chin up and kissed her lips tenderly. “As long as you stay with me like this, I can get you anything. I’ll treat you like a princess and lock you in my castle forever.”

Shin Hye giggled as she pulled him down and kissed him on his lips again. “Did you eat a lot of candy today? You are very sweet.”

Min Ho looked at her for a long second as his fingers gently along her jawline. “Are you scared of tomorrow?”

“A little.” Shin Hye replied, looking into his eyes. “But compared to the night before my kidney surgery, I feel better now. That surgery was really painful. The first three days were like hell. I have never been in so much pain before.”

Min Ho let out a long sigh. “My heart was like burning alive when I first saw the long cut at the side of your waistline up until almost your armpit. I didn’t expect that the cut will be so long.” He said in a painful tone, remembering everything she went through for the past one month. He caressed her cheek. “You told me that you will still have some odd stabbing pain in your abdomen sometimes. Are you still having the pain now? We can discuss with Seung Heon and see whether he can postpone the therapy or not.”

Shin Hye shook her head. “I’m feeling so much better now. Although it’s still a little sore but it’s bearable and I don’t think delaying the therapy will be a good idea. The sooner I start, the faster it will end.”

Min Ho pursed his lips, his fingers lingering on her face. “You are so strong and so brave.”

Shin Hye smirked at him. “Say that again after the therapy started. You might want to run away from me when that time comes.”

Min Ho pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly. “Never. Even if you use a knife to stab me or point a gun at my forehead, I would never run away from you.”

Shin Hye pressed herself closer to him and buried her face into his neck. “No matter how painful and tough the journey would be, I promise I’ll stay strong and try harder.”

“We will work hard together.” Min Ho tightened his arms around her as if afraid that she will fly away if he doesn’t hold her tightly.

Shin Hye kissed his neck and breathed in softly. “I’ll try my best to keep my heart beating, keep my lungs breathing… for you… for us…”

------------------------------------------------------------

Min Ho brought Shin Hye’s hand to his lips and kissed it softly before he turned to Seung Heon who was standing at the edge of the hospital bed.

“So how’s the blood test report? Is everything okay?” Min Ho asked.

Seung Heon smiled warmly at them as he nodded. “Everything is fine and the recovery from the surgery is faster than what we expected.”

He then turned to Min Ho and looked at him seriously. “It has been a month after the surgery. It’s about time we start with the biotherapy. I will put her on an intensive, two-phase treatment of interferons and interleukins. There will be horrible side effects from the medicine, especially vomiting. But I will try every possible way to make her feel comfortable. For the first part of the treatment, we will start with interferon injections. We will give the injections for five consecutive, full days. Interferons are a family of naturally-occurring proteins that are made and secreted by cells of the immune system. Interferons do not directly kill viral or cancerous cells; they boost the immune system response and reduce the growth of cancer cells by regulating the action of several genes that control the secretion of numerous cellular proteins that affect growth.”

Seung Heon heaved a deep sigh as he looked at both of them with a worried gaze. “As I told you, this treatment will be ten times tougher than the one you received last time. The side effects could be very severe. The most common ones will be flu-like symptom, fever, vomiting, headaches, muscle aches, pains, unusual bleeding or bruises, confusion, depression, suicidal thoughts and a lot more.”

Min Ho creased his brows. “Suicidal thoughts?” His heart skipped a beat hearing that word.

Seung Heon sighed again as he nodded. “Depression and suicide have been reported among patients receiving interferons. However, it is still unclear whether depression and suicidal thoughts are caused by the disease being treated or the interferons themselves. Therefore, all patients receiving treatment with interferon should be observed closely for the development of depression. That was why I suggest you to take a year off from your work so that you can stay by her side 24/7.”

Min Ho inhaled sharply as his grip on Shin Hye’s hand tightened. His face turned pale and his breathing was heavy. “How long does this interferons treatment last?”

“This will go on for four treatments, over a period of about eight weeks.” Seung Heon gave another worried gaze to Min Ho. “But interferons are not the worst one. We will monitor her condition after phase one and if everything goes well, we will start with the second phase which is the interleukins. This will be the toughest of all.”

Shin Hye felt the pressure on her hand increased and when she looked down, Min Ho was clenching so tightly onto her hand that his knuckles turned white. She looked at him and said softly. “Relax.”

Min Ho quickly loosened his grip on her hand and smiled embarrassedly at her. “I’m sorry.”

“We have already prepared ourselves for all these, right? Don’t worry. Everything will be alright.” Shin Hye gave him a warm smile.

He sighed deeply. He knows the treatment will not be easy but he never thought the side effects will be that severe. He could finally understand now why Shin Hye thought to give up earlier.

“Interleukins is a form of immunotherapy. It boosts the body’s immune system to help fight the cancer. Interleukins causes the body to make more of certain immune system cells, prompts immune system cells to more effective.” Seung Heon continued.

“For the second part of the biotherapy treatment, Shin Hye would not require staying in the hospital and she can stay at home. She just needs to come back for a shot three times a week for eight months. For this drug, the most severe side effect would be fatigue. You will find her sleeping all the time. The rest of the side effects will be almost the same as interferons but it might be slightly worse than that. I’ll give whatever I can to make her feel comfortable.”  

Seung Heon walked forward and patted Min Ho’s arm softly. “This battle will be very long and hard. You have to prepare yourself to fight together with her.”

Min Ho squeezed Shin Hye’s hand before looking back at Seung Heon. His gaze was firm and certain. “I have already prepared myself since the first day I knew about her sickness. As long as she can stay alive, I can deal with anything, even if I have to die.”

Seung Heon chuckled softly as he turned to Shin Hye. “Mrs Lee, can you hear that? Your husband said he can even die for you. For the next few months, just torture him as much as you want. He will be your personal slave.” He joked, trying to lighten the tensed atmosphere.

Shin Hye laughed as she caressed her husband’s hand. “So when do I get to start torturing him?”

“We will start the first jab this afternoon.” Seung Heon said.

Shin Hye took a deep breath and smiled at them.

“Okay. Let the journey begin.”

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1st month…

“Arghhh…” Shin Hye groaned in pain and she bit her lip hard. Her fingernails were dug deep into Min Ho skin as her hand clenched tightly onto his arm. “Oppa…” She pressed her hand against her abdomen as she curled into his body, trying to get some comfort from him.

Min Ho tightened his arms around her and holding her firmly in his embrace. “I know, I know. It’s very painful. You just need to bear for a little bit longer. The painkiller will kick in very soon. The nurse said you will feel better in a short while.”

Shin Hye sobbed painfully in his arms and more sweat beads formed on her forehead. “Don’t… don’t bring So Won… over tonight. I… I don’t want to scare her.”

Min Ho nodded. “Okay. I’ll let ahjuhma take care of her at home tonight. Don’t talk and rest for now, okay?”

“Oppa…” Ignoring what he said, she spoke again.

“Yes?” Min Ho clenched his jaw, enduring the pain his heart was suffering. It won’t be less hurt than what Shin Hye was having now.

“D-Don’t… don’t leave me. Please… stay with me…” She said weakly.

Min Ho pressed his lips into her hair and nodded. “I won’t leave you. I’ll stay with you forever.”

----------

2nd month

“Ugghhh… uuuggghhh…”

Min Ho rubbed Shin Hye’s back in soothing and kept her hair out of her face. His brows creased when he saw her face crooked in pain. She have been vomiting for the past one week and all the food that she tried to eat would not stay longer than an hour before she throw up everything. 

Shin Hye started to cry as soon as she was done. Min Ho quickly took the cloth at the bedside table and wiped her face gently. “It’s okay. I know it hurts. Take a deep breath.”

Before she could say anything, she felt nausea churned in her stomach again. She took a deep breath but it was coming and she couldn’t help it but continue to spill all the contents of her stomach into the bucket Min Ho was holding. Once there was nothing else left to throw up, Min Ho let go of her hair and continued to rub her back.

“Feeling better? Do you want me to call the nurse?” He asked softly after he put the bucket down.

Shin Hye inhaled deeply as tears ran down her cheeks again. She rested her head against his chest and sobbed hardly.

Min Ho wrapped his arms tightly around her, trying hard to soothe her. “Don’t cry. Seung Heon said you will feel better after the phase one ended.”

“How can it be better? After this one ended, there will be phase two and it will only be worse.” Shin Hye cried painfully. “I don’t know how long I can stand anymore.”

Min Ho pressed his lips to her forehead and tightening his arms around her small trembling body. Warm pool of tears had formed in his eyes too. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry to make you suffer all this for me.”

-----------

3rd month…

“The report was good and Shin Hye’s body was reacting very positively towards the first phase of the treatment. Looking at her condition now, we can start with interleukins tomorrow. She will need to take the jab three times a week and since the side effects will be worsen; I will suggest her to continue staying in the hospital for another month before she can go home to rest.” Seung Heon said as he closed the file on his table.

Min Ho looked at Seung Heon worriedly as he shifted uncomfortably on the chair. “The side effects will be worse? She just started to feel better these few days and you are going to start the second stage so soon? Are you sure her body could stand all those side effects? She barely sleep at night due to the muscle aching. She will throw up anything she tried to eat. She had lost at least 15 kg for the past 3 months.”

Seung Heon heaved a deep sigh. “This is normal for a cancer patient. Every patient will lose weight when the therapy started. As I told you it will be very tough. And it’s only the beginning.”

Min Ho sighed deeply as he massaged his temple. “I think she is slowly developing depression. She has very serious mood swing these few days. She will suddenly cry out of the blues and said she want to stop the treatment and go back to Jeju Island.”

Seung Heon nodded. “It’s normal. There is nothing much we could do. The only thing you can do for her now is try to be more understanding and stay with her no matter what. Let her cry when she want to cry. Let her scream when she is angry. Just make sure she doesn’t have any suicidal thoughts. Make sure she is not alone.”

Min Ho exhaled sharply before he nodded.  

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4th month…

Min Ho heaved a deep breath when the whole plate of rice was smashed on the floor in front of him.

“Stop asking me to eat!!” Shin Hye raised her voice as tears rolling down her cheeks uncontrollably. “I told you I don’t want to eat! I couldn’t taste anything and my throat was burning whenever I try to swallow something.”

Se Yeon held her hand and caressed it softly, trying to calm her down. “Okay, okay. If you don’t have the appetite to eat now, then we will try again later, okay? Don’t cry.” She pulled Shin Hye into her arms and her back soothingly.

Min Ho sighed silently before he looked at Se Yeon. “I’ll call the nurse to clean all this. I’ll call ahjuhma to make some porridge for her later. I think it will…”

“Just go…” Shin Hye cut him off without looking at him.

Min Ho turned to her and looked at her sadly.

Shin Hye swallowed hard and closed her eyes. “Just go and don’t come back. My head hurt so much and I feel like vomiting whenever I see you. I felt breathless and suffocated when you are around. Please just go…” She sobbed.

“Shin Hye-ah…” Se Yeon gave Min Ho a sympathy gaze.

Min Ho inhaled sharply, trying to suppress the emotions that were burning inside of him. “I’ll go back to see So Won and come back later.” Without giving a chance for Shin Hye to say another word to hurt him, he quickly opened the door and walked out of the room.

----------

5th month…

Shin Hye slowly opened her eyes when she felt warm and soft lips touched her forehead.

“Hi Mrs Lee.” Min Ho smiled at her.

She looked at him for a while before she tried to sit up.

Min Ho quickly helped her up and put the pillow behind her to lean on.

“What’s the time now?” Shin Hye asked.

“It’s almost 10pm.” Min Ho replied.

Shin Hye turned to the bedside table when her mind slowly recalled what happened before she fell asleep just now. She saw her phone lying on the table with the screen broken.

Min Ho followed her gaze and he knows what she was thinking. He held her hand in his and smiled warmly at her. “It’s okay.”

Tears started to pool in her eyes before she looked at him. “I didn’t mean to lose my temper and throw my phone at you. My head was aching, my body was aching, my stomach was aching and everything just doesn’t feel right. I always have this weird feeling and I just don’t feel like myself lately. When I saw that nurse flirting with you, I just got so angry. She is so pretty and so healthy and I’m so ugly…”

“Shhh…” Min Ho cut her off and cupped her cheeks. “Who dare to say my wife is ugly? You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life.” He gently wiped her tears away. “You have a pair of beautiful eyes that make my heart fluttered whenever I look at it.” He said as he leaned forward and kissed her eyes softly. “Your nose is sharp and tiny point, looking perfect on this beautiful face.” He kissed the tip of her nose before his gaze slowly dropped to her lips. “You have a pair of small and pinkish lips that looked so alluring and inviting.” He leaned forward again and kissed it softly. “Inviting me to kiss them every time I look at it.” He whispered against her lips.

Shin Hye threw herself into his arms and hugged him tightly. “I’m sorry…”

Min Ho her hair lovingly. “It’s okay. I know you were depressed because of the treatment. You didn’t mean anything you say or do.” After a while, he pulled away from her and took out a box from a paper bag that was lying on the chair.

Shin Hye saw him taking a new phone out from the box and put it in her hand.

Min Ho smiled at her and helped her to switch the phone on. “It’s good that you broke your phone. It gives me an excuse to buy a present for you.”

Shin Hye looked down at the screen of the phone and her lips slowly curled up into a soft smile when she saw the wallpaper. She then put the phone down and leaned back into his embrace again. She buried her face into his neck and inhaled into his fresh and calming scent.

“You have to keep that in mind. No matter how many times I said I hate you, it always means I love you.” She said softly, reminding him.

Min Ho tightened his arms around her and nodded. “I know.”

----------

6th month…

Shin Hye opened her eyes when she felt someone patted softly on her shoulder. She smiled when she saw So Won kneeling beside her on the bed.

“Eomma, it’s time to take the medicine. Are you very tired? You have been sleeping since lunchtime. It’s almost 11pm now.” So Won asked with a worried tone.

Shin Hye slowly pulled herself up and leaned against the headboard. “Hmmm… eomma felt drowsy and lack of energy. I just feel like sleeping all the time.”

So Won moved closer to her and took her arm, massaging it softly. “Are your muscles and bones still very sore? Let So Won massage for you. Seung Heon ahjuhsi said we have to massage your arms and legs so that you won’t get swollen easily.”

Shin Hye smiled and nodded. “Thank you so much, So Won.” She then scanned around the room before looking back at her. “Where is appa?”

“He is talking with Secretary Oh in the study room. Do you want to see him? I can go to…”

“No.” Shin Hye cut her off. “I’m just asking.” She doesn’t want to disturb him. Secretary Oh must have something very important to discuss with him. If it wasn’t something urgent, he won’t disturb him during his holiday. She sighed deeply, looking at So Won who was busy massaging her legs now. She was sure her husband must have suffered a lot too for the past six months. Sometimes it’s more torturing when you have to witness the one you love suffered from all the pains but you couldn’t do anything. He must have felt very helpless looking at her without knowing what to do.

She was very lucky for having him by her side during this critical time. Although the pains and mild depression were killing her softly but she was grateful to have him to fight together with her. They were already half way through the battle. She just needs to endure for another 4 months before the second stage of the treatments ended. She knows she can do it for him and So Won.

----------

7th month…

Min Ho was nervously pacing back and forth in front of the ER when In Sung and Se Yeon arrived.

“What happened to Shin Hye?” Se Yeon asked worriedly.

Min Ho sighed deeply. “I don’t know. She was still alright before we sleep but then she suddenly couldn’t breathe. Her nose was bleeding nonstop and she just passed out.”

In Sung patted his shoulder and looked at him with sympathy. “She will be alright. Seung Heon will not let anything happen to her.”

Just then, Seung Heon came out from the ER and Min Ho immediately rushed towards him. “How’s she?”

“The drowsiness and breathlessness was due to the drop in red blood cells which is also known as anaemia. This is actually a common side effect for the therapy. But because it was quite serious so we will give her a blood transfusion.” Seung Heon explained.

“How about her nose bleeding? The blood just wouldn’t stop.” Min Ho asked again.

“Nose bleeding, gums bleeding, bruises on arms and legs are due to drop in platelets. It’s normal. I’ll give her some medication on that and she should get better.” Seung Heun sighed softly as he patted Min Ho’s arms. “Don’t worry. Nothing too serious. This kind of situation is common and it will happen. Overall, she is doing well. The tumour in her liver didn’t grow and it even shrinks the last time we checked. It was under control.”

Min Ho let out a sigh of relief before he held his eyes. “Please make sure she is okay. I can’t lose her. I really can’t…” He pleads softly as he sat on the chair and buried his face in his palms.

Seung Heon squeezed his shoulder. “Your wife is very strong. You have to stay stronger for her too.”

----------

8th month…

Min Ho clapped his hand happily after he put the bowl down on the bedside table. “Mrs Lee is very daebak today. She finished the whole bowl of porridge.”

Shin Hye smiled as she wiped her lips with a tissue. “Because Mr Lee’s cooking skill have improved so much. The chicken porridge is so delicious.”

Min Ho’s grin grew wider as he took her hand in his. “If you like to eat, I can cook for you every day.”

The smile on Shin Hye’s face slowly faded as she brought her hand to his face and caressed the dark circles under his eyes. “You looked very tired. Mrs Lee has drained out all of Mr Lee’s energy.”

Min Ho exhaled a soft breath before he smiled at her. “Compared to what you have gone through, this is nothing. We just need to stand for another 2 months.”

Shin Hye nodded. “Yes, just another 2 months.”

----------

9th month…

“Happy birthday!”

Shin Hye’s eyes widened in surprise when she saw her father standing in front of her.

“Appa… what are you doing here? Oh my god. Appa…” She got down of the bed and threw herself into her father’s arms. “Appa, I miss you so much.” She started to cry when her father her hair.

“Appa miss you a lot too.” Park Soon Jae said with his eyes reddened. His heart was aching so badly seeing his daughter lost so much weight and looked so pale.

Shin Hye pulled away from her father. “Why didn’t you call me before you come? I should go to the airport to pick you up.”

Park Soon Jae looked at his d