While he's not around

Sorry if it's a one day late but enjoy~~

Sorry for mistakes

[Gonna update in 2 or 3 hours from now for chapter 14. Sorry for delay. Mianhae, Sumimasen/Gomenasai, Im sorry, lo siento, Dui bu qi, Mohon maaf, Pasensya]

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Another morning has come and I didn't get any sleep. My head hurts and my heart is very tired for it is beating so fast. All I could blame is SEHUN.

" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH------------" I grabbed some of my hair while screaming and I tell you, it hurts.

"WHY DO I ALWAYS THINK OF HIM?!!!" I tried to calm my nerves since my heart starts beating again fastly. I have many questions to myself that I can't answer. I am not even sure right now if what's the real problem.

"Better focus on the training today" I mumbled to myself before leaving the bed and go to the bathroom. Just when I'm about to open the door, a tall figure come out with his hands on his head with a towel because his hair is dripping wet. Well who else I am talking about? It's my roommate----- Kris.

"Good morning!" I greeted him a little bit slowly. My eyes roam from his eyes down to his neck then shoulders until it landed on his waist. He looks like an anime character. I saw him nodded and I really have to hide my blush not just because of his good body but because he is liek a living anime lead. You know, when the main guy character came out from the bathroom after showering and they look PERFECT?! -- hehe I've watched few anime that's why

He walked past me and starts changin his clothes while I shower. In 4 days, Sehun would be here and honestly, I am relieved and a little bit.....just a little.........excited. Oh my I'm blushing just by thinking of him! I really want to have someone here with me too but it doubles my satisfaction when I knew it's....Se....my....Se--hun... Did I just call him my? 0.0 Gosh! I need a doctor. Someone call the doctor!!

Honestly, who won't want Sehun? I mean he is Sehun! S.E.H.U.N. Almost everyone wants him. While me, I am the president of my school. Of course they know me but I know they feared me more. Sehun is like a character from some dramas that is popular and being praised in everything, anything that he does. Too much to compare with me.

When I walked out of the bathroom, Kris was already gone as always. I fix my clothes and do the last checking of everything before closing the door and went to the hall. I saw some of my new friends and walk straight to their table. Once I sit down on the vacant chair, almost all of them spoke.

"Hey hyung so are you excited that your first love is coming?"

"I bet you guys will do something wild when he comes"

"Yah! He's too young for that! but if you guys ever do it....."

"Nooooooooo! you are tainting his mind. He's innocent!"

"Yeah I know, just if ever you know, share your experience! what are friends for?"

"Guys, I think he is too red right now...."

"Also when are you confessing to him? I mean I think you are not the type to just hit it off"

"NO NEED THEY COULD JUST DO IT ALREADY!!!"

"What? NO WAY! I did it with Myungsoo after our first date!"

"Eww. Anyway stop now Luhan is----"

"FINE! After the first date!

"NO! CONFESS FIRST THEN FIRST DATE THEN BANG!

"GUYYYYYSSSS!" they all looked at Luhan who is now blushing so hard.

"Oh my gosh! He's blushing so cute." Sungyeol walk to Luhan and give him a tight squezze. Sunggyu gave the tall man a glare and the other pouted before sitting down on his chair. Luhan gave him a small smile for understanding before speaking up.

"First of all I am not doing anything that you gusy just said. I am not going to have....se..uhm..se-eh...you know what I mean. Not on the first date, nor this friday nor after I confessed to him which is also not going to happen-------------anytime soon. Also, He is---" Luhan was interrupted by Key.

" Then when? After this training?" Key asked curiously and at the same time a little bit seriously. Jonghyun elbowed him and asked what's the probelem. The older just said that he doesn't need to know which made the latter pout.

" Lastly, who says he is my first love? He is--"

"well have you got your first love hyung?" Sungyeol asked. Luhan stopped for a moment and remeber that he never had. Pursing his lips he shook his head and it made the younger one clapped his hands and grin widely.

" YES! I knew it! That sehun will be your first love. I'm so great!" He jumped on his seat and seconds later Key joined him. Both are doing some weird dance.

He suddenly looked at Kris who is quite the whole time. He remembers his friend, Tao. Even if he is not purely sure but he believes that those two needs some talk. So from now on he promised that he will try to be close with Kris. Might as well know my friend's-future-boyfriend-or-husband and I bet Baekhyun would be jealous that I get to know him first because he said that the parents should accept first regarding the relationship of their children, and he is our mother.

The bell rang after 10 minutes and we all gather around the field. The head of this activity trainigng is Mr. Park. I think he is a PE teacher because of his uniform. He instructs us to fall in line by our room number. We will be divided in groups and each team should accomplished all the task, failed or not. I study my surroundings and like I expected many are sleepy and I guess have head aches. That's what they get for drinking too much last night. I'm about to talk to Sunggyu when Mr. Park spoke.

" Today until the following days except for the last 2 days of this training, all of you will undergo physical, mental and psychological tests. You are encourage to not give up. We promise you that this training would be a big help in your future. Remeber that no one is allowed to judge anyone based on their results. It's the effort in the process that's important. SO NOW LETS START THIS!" Mr park shouted the last part and all cheered.

After 3 hours of the game.......

" Why did they choose to do the physical test today? I'm so tired. " I said. they made us run for 10 laps around the field by group then drunk 4 glasses of water and made us climbed the wall (you know rock climbing?) up to the other side and a group task was given to us.

First we build a tent using the materials. No instructions. We're lucky we have Sunggyu in our team. Then the next task is to lift a big rock with 3 members only. I'm glad i'm not one of them. Third is playing basketball with one hand. We have to shoot 20 balls. I tried and I only shooted 2 balls but my team is fine with it. Fourth is carrying 6 thick books while doing a lap around the chair that is 12 meters away. All of us have to try it. We had some problems with the 2 girls and a boy but we cheered them up. We finished the fourth coarse.

When we are heading on the next task, I bumped with Kris. I lost my balance for a bit but then his hands steadies me. He ask if I'm okay and I nodded and said sorry. He gave me a small smile and I did too. I fix myself and is about to say good bye when a girl run with us.

" Oppa! are you okay? do you want to go to the nurse?" the girl asked Kris not even bothering to look at me.

" OMG! are you hurt? Did this guy bumped you hard?" He asked and I am surprised. Kris is taller and mor muscular than me if she haven't noticed. I would be the one getting hurt if we seriously collide with each other.

"You! Can't you see properly? You're not paying attention to your way. You hurt my oppa!" She looked angry. I didn't mean to bumped him. This girl is so annoying. I looked at Kris and I see that he is trying to say sorry for this girl attitude.

"Stop it Krystal. He is my friend. Go back to your team now." Krystal is about to say something but she just pouted and give a glare to me before walkign away.

"Sorry for that. She's such a bother. Anyway, go to your team now." I nodded and said goodbye. I said that we should talk some time. I catch up with my group mates.

"Luhan it's your turn" Sunggyu said to me and I asked what I'm supposed to do.

"You need 70 push ups and 70 curl ups but since I think your a bit weak I'll just make it 50 both. Start now." I looked at Mr. Park with my mouth wide open.

"This is just the first day so don't give up" He smirked at me and I swear HE LOOKS EVIL!

"YOU'LL NEVER SEE ME AFTER 4 DAYS. JUST ATTEND MY DEATH CEREMONY." With that I start digging my way to hell.

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The night is dark and wind is howling pleasantly. Kyungsoo is at the back of the bar taking his 15 minutes break. He likes it there because it cools him down and the inside of the room is so noisy that it makes his head dizzy. He's been having double shift becasue Luhan is not there and they are the only bartenders. He doesn't blame Luhan though for he understands that he has to attend the school's training in Japan.

A sound of running footsteps was heard. His heart races because what if it's some kind of or addicts? He is alone in the back door and he has nothing for defense. He tried to calm himself. It is probably some guy running back home. Don't over think. Slowly, he closed his eyes and was shot open again because the sounds comes nearer and louder at his direction. Please, I hope that's him. Nothing else but him. I hope it's --

" ...Jongin" He finished his sentence and the footsteps stopped. A ragged breath was heard and he saw the man he's been looking for.

"that's...ahhhhh...the first....ahh..ahhh...time you said.....my real name" He found his heart in the steady pace but becomes abnormal the moment he saw a faint blush on kyungsoo's cheeks.

"Whatever. You're late" He accused and looks anywhere but the guy in front of him.

"I'm sorry. I need to do some works after my last class. I'm graduating so that's why" Kai explained.

"Ohh you never told me. Anyway now I know. You don't need to tell me everything you know. It's--" He was cutted by Kai who widens his eyes at kyungsoo.

"NOooo! I wan to tell you everything. I mean I promised to be honest from now on, not like I have lied before to you. I want your full trust so you can like me also then we can date. I'll help you everyday and finish our studies then get marri--" the smaller cut him off by running towards him and placed his hand on his lips. Kai smiled seeing his love of his life red as a tomato.

"Okay. fine. You told me that for like 5x already. I get it. And it still gives me shiver. Can you just....take it slow? I mean you confessed and now.....your....courting me......BUT YOU ARE TOO SWEETAND GENTLEMAN AND HONEST AND VERY HANDSOME AND ANNOYING AND I DONT DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME. YOU'RE GIVING ME HEADACHE! YOU ARE NOT GIVING ME SPACE" He finish his rant and closes his eyes. It feels good to blow your mind off sometimes. But wait, did I just said that? !!. He looked at the younger and saw him with his mouth in an 'o'. The hurt in his eyes is very visible.

"Jongin I-------" He tried to approach the younger but the other step backwards. He didn't mean to said the bad things. It is true but he doesn't want to hurt Kai. He is just pissed off because earlier there are two guys hitting on him and one of them tried to grab him and dragged him away in God's knows where if only the bouncers weren't there. Plus, the lack of sleep made it worse.

"You think I am annoying?" Kai asked with a sad tone. His head was put down and you could feel and hear the hurt from his voice.

"No! I mean yes sometimes but It's not exactly......." He tried to convince him but he can't form the right words.

"Sorry if I gave you headaches. I didn't mean to. I just want us to be close since I've done the first step I just thought of doing the second but I...didn't know....I'm sorry. I'll stop annoying you from now on. Get home safely okay? And...............this is..............your dinner." The taller of the two pulled out a lunch box from his bag and handed it to Kyungsoo.

"That's one of the reasons why I'm late. I tried making you bulgogi. I don't know if it's delicious but I hope......silly me....who am I to think you'll like it. Anyway just put it in the trash, it definitely doesn't taste good. So I think I can't walk you home today......" Kyungsoo is in panic. He doesn't want this day to end like this. He just wants to go home in 2 hours with Kai telling him about his experiences or random things while walking together at his apartment. He's shaking his head to say that he disagree on what the other is saying.

"............or maybe not anymore. Thanks for the compliments by the way. Bye. " Kai gave him a small smile and he shook his head more while feeling tears building up his eyes. Why you didn't speak? Now you're crying. It's your fault! you shouldn't have let your anger overpowered you. You're just stressed. So what will you do now? He left. You hurted him. His brain is not functioning well. But then there are voices in his mind.

"It's okay hyung. I know it's not your fault. You didn't mean to right? Junmyeon hyung will understand. He knows that when you're stressed you said thing you didn't mean."

"Really?"

"Yes! He loves you so much. We love you hyung."

"NOOOOOO! He doesn't love me! He deserves it because he's cheating on me. But I love him. I didn't mean to accused him that he is too clingy and only wants me for . I am just angry on what I saw. I love him too much."

"Don't cry hyung. He's not cheating on you. The guy we saw with him is his cousin. Remember? He introduced him to us last month. You should trust him hyung. Relationships won't last if you don't have trust with your partner to begin with. Stop accusing Junmyeon hyung everytime, he might get tired of you."

"OH MY! I don't want that Sungjong. I need him."

"Then you have to fight your trust issues"

Memories flooded Kyungsoo's mind and He felt the sadness again. Two important person in his life left him because of his issues. He regretted that day. He always blames himself. If only he did something before and not let his jealousy strikes everytime. But he has changed now. He believes so himself. But why is it coming back? I taught I'm healed. He is the reason why I took a therapy two years ago.

"I shouldn't have stopped my therapy. I don't want to be locked again with my old self like I was 2 years ago......Jongin deserves someone better. He doesn't deserve a murderer."

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So that's it. Sorry for the long wait. Happy Valentine's Day everyone.

did you like the chapter?

I added Kaisoo so I could make some progress with them. Just to be clear in the following chapters I will reveal the past of Kyungsoo.

A little Krishan on the next chapter but also Hunhan coz Sehun is coming. I might start with kaisoo though in the beginning of the next chapter.

Hope you guys will wait for the next update which is next week. I'll choose between Wednesday or Thursday maybe. [Gonna update in 2 or 3 hours from now. Sorry for delay. Mianhae, Sumimasen/Gomenasai, Im sorry, lo siento, Dui bu qi, Mohon maaf, Pasensya]

I miss them!