Step one, you say, "We need to talk."
He walks, you say, "Sit down. It's just a talk."
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through

***

10:46PM

Jongin sat in silence as he gripped onto his knees. Sehun at the wheel beside him had his hands gripped around the steering wheel so tight his knuckles turned white. They pulled up in front of the giant glass building as instructed by Jongin – Jonghyun’s company to be exact. The two boys step out still in their Valentino suits and were greeted by the security. “Mr. Kim,” they recognise the young man immediately.

Ignoring their presence Jongin marched into the elevator with Sehun by his side. “Didn’t you tell me he was working for Bae Doojoon? Why is he working for your father now?”

“His internship ended last week, my father convinced him to work for us instead. Keep it in the family you know,” Jongin snorted at the thought. Family, the word was bitter on his tongue.

As the elevator doors open Jongin noticed the only light left in the office. Sehun grabbed his wrist, “You know what you’re doing right?”

Jongin brushed him off and made his way towards the office where the door was left ajar. “Jongin?” Soohyun stood up from his table before Jongin launched his fist at his jaw.

“That…” he says, grunting from the pain before he could continue, “That was for Suzy.”

Immediately Soohyun climbed to his feet, “You don’t understand, I didn’t know.”

“Pack up everything and tell my father you will no longer work for him. You had a better offer in America and you’re going to take it.”

“Jongin, you’re being ridiculous, I really didn’t know.”

“You didn’t know?” Jongin shouted in frustration, “You didn’t know?” he raised his fist in the air, grabbing the older male by the collar as Sehun stared at the both of them whilst digging his hands into his pocket and taking in the sight.

“Myungsoo told me that Suzy asked him to come that night, I didn’t know he forced himself onto her.”

“You forget that I know when you lie don’t you?” Jongin smirks, “Your nose flares and you have a terrible habit of chewing on the inside of your cheeks. It’s really subtle to the untrained eye and I would only know that because I always considered you someone close.”

Soohyun stopped, stood up and grabbed a firm handle on his seat to stable himself. “Yeah? And?” he asks, voice sounding hollow, demeanour changing completely. “What if I knew?”

Jongin rolled his eyes, “Why’d you do it?”

“I did it for you, Jongin,” he smirked, “Wouldn’t you have preferred to date a girl with experience?”

Jongin felt his stomach church, the look in Soohyun’s eyes changed immediately. He no longer recognised the man whom he once affectionately called hyung. “What?”

“It was obvious you liked the girl, I was getting her warmed up for you.”

Jongin clenched his fist and whirled it at Soohyun again sending him onto the floor. “You’re going to leave and never come back again, do you hear?”

“Or you’ll do what? Throw a tantrum to your daddy?” Soohyun teases, sarcasm laced in his voice. “Your father needs me, he won’t let me go so easily. I can be like that dutiful son he never had.”

“Is that why you did it? Because you were jealous of me?”

“Only a child would think that,” Soohyun spat, climbed to his feet and wiped the corner of his lip where he was beginning to bleed.

“You’re jealous because your mother was disowned by grandfather, you never inherited a penny and you’ve been leeching off us ever since you came back.”

“I’m only doing what my parents never had the guts to do. Fight for what’s rightfully theirs.”

“What did Suzy have to do with any of this?” Jongin asked, “Why did you drag her into this?”

“Because Kim Jongin was always used to getting his way. I wanted to see how you would react to have something taken away from you and you had no control over it. Sort of like how grandfather has treated me for the past twenty years.”

There’s a rage that builds up in Jongin’s chest, a rage that he’s never felt before. It’s pressing down on his chest and making it hard for him to breathe. No matter what he tried it wouldn’t disappear. This rage, this anger that he’s never felt before. With a deep breath he lets out a heavy sigh, “You’re messed up,” Jongin rolls his eyes and walks away towards Sehun. “Let’s leave.” Jongin grabbed onto his wrist, “I don’t want to hear this anymore.”

Sehun nodded and fished his phone out of his pocket. “Oh by the way,” Sehun adds, “I’d adhere to Jongin’s suggestion of you leaving on your own accord before things get messy.” Sehun flashed his phone and pressed the play button. Out came the unmistakable voices of Soohyun and Jongin, their conversation recorded entirely on Sehun’s phone. Sehun walked closer and tapped him gently on the cheek, “It was nice knowing you,” he says before leaving with Jongin.

As they enter the elevator once more Sehun looked over to Jongin to offer some help. “How are you?”

“If Suzy didn’t know me she would’ve been better off,” Jongin says and Sehun notices how his eyes were lined red and all he could do was offer him a soothing pat on the back.

“You did good, Jongin. Suzy would be proud.”

***

11:50PM

Jihyun banged her fist furiously on the door of Suzy’s dorm but to no avail. She hadn’t responded to anyone’s calls throughout the entire night. “Eunsang grab the key,” Jihyun demanded.

“The key?” she asks.

“The master key for this house, it’s in my bedside draw.” Jihyun was fuming, face red, breath reeking of alcohol and voice booming in Eunsang’s ear. “This brat thinks that she can just leave right in the middle of a procession, makes me look bad.”

Eunsang rushed back with a key in her hand and handed it to Jihyun, hands trembling. “I should’ve left her at the orphanage all those years ago. I’ve done it before. Save myself from the heartache.”

“Before?” Eunsang’s question however goes unheard as Jihyun swung the door open only to be greeted by a dark and empty room. Suzy was gone. The clock struck midnight as the old grandfather clock downstairs chimed to alert the occupants of the house.

***

7:30AM

“Is Suzy with you?”

It’s the first question that immediately comes out of his mouth when Sehun answers his phone. The other boy still asleep as evident by the sound of his voice. “No?” he replies before sitting up. “Why what’s wrong?”

“I went to check on her this morning but Eunsang thinks she ran away from home and I can’t contact her phone.” Sehun yawn in response. It was too early to be thinking about this. “Sehun…” Jongin’s voice trails off.

“Jongin, what do you want? We have classes today. Plus, Suzy probably wants to take a break from that hellhole anyway. Last night was, well to say the least, big for her. You heard her. She was afraid of us finding out and now that we all know of course she wants to go into hiding.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“If I was her, and I think I’ve managed to gain some sort of understanding about how Suzy works – she never wants to bother people. Let alone the people she loves. It’s the reason why she ran away before. Right now what Suzy wants to be alone. I’m sure she’s fine.”

Jongin pauses for a second and contemplates, “I’ll see you at school.”

“Yeah,” Sehun mumbles and hangs up the phone. “Don’t make me a liar Bae Suzy,” Sehun sighed as he rolled out of bed.

***

12:48AM

“So what happened last night?” San asked, eyes never leaving her.

“What do you mean?” Soojung doesn’t take her eyes off the menu.

They were at a restaurant in the affluent Gangnam. Although Soojung had only been gone for over a month, there were things that she had missed about Seoul. She missed the food, the culture, the people but mostly being free. She could only speak basic French.

She didn’t have the connections she had whilst she was over here.

“Are you coming back to France?” San asks.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Because you’ve still got a lot of things left back here to deal with.”

Soojung smirks, and shakes her head before closing the menu and calling over the waiter. San observed quietly as Soojung ordered their meal for them with so much ease and confidence. He was used to ordering for them over in France.

“San, I like you,” Soojung says, “How is this going to work if I’m here?”

She squeezes his hand and offers him a reassuring smile.

“Plus, my mother wasn’t happy that I chose to come back for this event. So she’ll be excepting me to be home as soon as possible.”

***

3:15PM

The final bell rings for the day and Jongin is already halfway outside when Sehun stops him. “Did you want to grab dinner tonight?”

“Sehun…” Jongin sighs and glances at his watch. “I need to get home.”

“A person has be gone for forty eight hours before they can be reported as missing. There’s nothing you can do for her, Jongin.”

Jongin pauses for a moment, “Please don’t tell me you know where she is?”

“What?”

“Because it would be extremely low of you to keep this from me.”

“You’re nuts.”

“Well then why aren’t you worried about her?”

“God, Jongin, don’t chastise me just because I’m not acting the way you want me to. Remember that before you knew, before anyone else knew I knew. I looked after her.”

“Right,” Jongin sniggers, “You’re her best friend, I forgot about that.” Jongin rolls his eyes and walks away, loosens his fist and buries his cold hands into his pockets.

“Yeah, maybe I am but it’s only a poor reflection on you. Suzy needs someone with their head screwed on straight to help her. Not someone who’s going to crowd her and coddle her and looking at her like she’s broken – that was what she was most afraid of.”

“Whatever,” Jongin snorted, despite knowing that Sehun was right. “I’m going to look for her, you’re welcome to join me if not then goodbye.”

***

6:20PM

Sehun hadn’t a clue where to start searching. It wasn’t as if best friend would’ve ever been to describe him and Suzy. He wasn’t the one she used to come running too when there were monsters under the bed, or the one she ever told her secrets too. Sehun was always just there for Suzy like she was for them. Until she left they tolerated each other.

Then she disappeared and Sehun wondered why he was so affected by it. It wasn’t like they were best friends. Sehun always believed it was because partly because of how it made Jongin angry, and how it made Soojung upset but when they eventually found each other Sehun had to admit that a small part of him still missed Suzy.

‘She’s not at the regular spot.’ Jongin’s message read and Sehun quickened his pace.

Sehun had been walking around for the past hour, walking through restaurants and cafes. There wasn’t much that would make him believe that Suzy was here but Sehun hadn’t the slightest clue.

“If I ran away from home where would I be?” Sehun uttered, pressing the phone to his lips contemplatively. “Hotel.”

***

6:43PM

Jongin pushed his way through the crowd, checking every face as he walked by to see if he would run into her. The bass was pulsing through the building and he could feel the vibrations through his feet. The crowd was going wild, even on a Monday night. He pushed his way through to the bar and observed the line of girls pushing themselves forward to get a drink.

“Jongin?” her voice called out to him over the music and he swears his heart stops as he turns around. Hoping, anticipating.

“Seungwan,” Jongin settles back into his skin. “Have you seen Suzy?”

“Suzy? Yeah, she was here an hour ago.”

“Where’d she go?”

“She left with some guys but I don’t know where, they caught a taxi and left…” Seungwan sounded hesitant as she told him. “Is she ok, Jongin? They were definitely taking something…”

“She will be,” Jongin squeezed her shoulder and pushed pass quickly.

***

7:18PM

“Sehun?”

“What is it?”

“Seungwan said she saw Suzy at the bar an hour ago but she left in a taxi with two guys. She thinks she was taking something too…”

“I’m on the way back to my hotel to see if she’s checked in there. If she’s not we’re going to need more help to find her, Jongin. Time is of the essence. We don’t know what she’s taking and what those guys are going to do to her.”

“We can’t ask her parents, they’ll flip.”

“No, but you know exactly who we can ask.”

“Sehun, I’m not going to…”

“You can’t even put your relationship aside for your best friend who needs your help?”

“Sehun, I…”

Before Jongin managed to protest further Sehun hung up his phone. The other boy was right, time was of the essence and they needed as much help as possible.

***

7:25PM

“Hello?”

“Soojung?”

“Yes?”

They both held their breaths, neither wanting to speak. It had become so awkward between them in a short amount of time. Jongin believed that the distance would’ve made it easier, but it didn’t.

“It’s me, Jongin,” he finally musters up the courage to say.

“Yeah, I know. Caller ID. What’s wrong?”

“I need your help, Suzy’s gone missing.”

***

7:30PM

“Our plane leaves in three hours, Soojung!” San protests as Soojung is about to march out of the door with her coat and bag.

“Well if you’re so concerned you go first, if I miss it I’ll catch the next one back.” Soojung brushes past him but San grabs onto her wrist tightly.

“You said your mother was already upset with you, do you think she’ll be happy if you stay longer?”

“Well I’m sorry, but my mother’s feelings are going to have to take a backseat right now. Ironic anyway since she’s never thought twice about me.”

“Soojung,” San calls to her pleadingly.

“Go first,” Soojung wraps her arm around his body and plants a quick kiss on his cheek. “I’ll see you back home.” She slips into her shoes and rushes out of the door without a second thought.

“Promise?” San asks but Soojung closes the door before he gets a reply.

***

8:00PM

Soojung meets up with Sehun in front of his father’s hotel. They stood a fair distance a part as Sehun waited for Jongin to arrive. “So…” Soojung starts.

“San? Really?” Sehun snorts.

“What about him?” Soojung asks defensively.

“Oh, I don’t know… We all know that you brought him here to make someone jealous.”

Soojung rolled her eyes, and turned her head the other way as to ignore him.

“I missed you too, Princess,” Sehun tousled her hair and grinned.

Soojung opens up as if to say something before Jongin interrupts them both. “Are you ready?” he pants breathlessly.

“Yeah, she’s not at the hotel and I’ve already scoured through most of the cafes and bars in Hongdae.”

“I just did Gangnam.”

“I’ve called Hyeri and Jinri to join in on the search, they’ll get to me if they find anything,” Soojung chimes in.

“Great, now I’ll go to Apgujeong, and you-”

“Jongin, have you eaten?” Sehun asks.

“That’s not a priority right now,” he says.

“Did you sleep well last night?”

“Sehun!”

“You’re not driving if you’re going to fall asleep at the wheel,” Sehun grabbed onto Jongin’s wrist tightly.

“Well are you going to drive me?”

“Better than you getting into a car accident.”

Jongin knew better than to waste time arguing over something so trivial so he accepted Sehun’s offer to drive him around. It was true, he was feeling a bit fatigued. The lack of food in his body wasn’t helping either and yet Jongin still had no appetite.

“Are you going to be fine by yourself, Princess?” Sehun his head sideways and Soojung nods.

***

6:10AM

Sehun had insisted Jongin catch some sleep at his place before they continued with their search. After all there was only so much ground the could cover without help and with Sehun fatigued as well neither boy was in a position to drive.

Soojung however heads back to the place she had spent her last few months living in with high hopes. With a heavy sigh she presses the doorbell. It was far too early and Soojung felt guilty but the guilt eased immediately as Eunsang greeted Soojung with a warm embrace. A bittersweet feeling for both ladies when they realised that Suzy was not at home. Eunsang brings Soojung inside and sets up a pot of tea for her. Her eyes were lined red from the fatigue and her body kept shivering from the cold. The maid offers her a blanket to wrap around her shoulder and some snacks to replenish her energy.

“It’s been more than twenty four hours,” Eunsang sighs.

“I’m sure she’ll come home soon.”

“For now you need to rest up, you must be tired.” Eunsang fluffs the pillows for her and gestures for her to lay down.

“I’m fine,” Soojung lies, “The tea will keep me up.”

“What do you plan on doing?”

“If she’s not home by midday we notify the police.”

Eunsang nods in agreement, they were only teenagers after all and they had already stretched themselves far enough. “Thank you, Soojung.” Eunsang pours her a cup of tea as Soojung looks up at her with a bewildered expression. “You’re a true friend to Suzy, god knows that she really needs someone like you.”

Soojung feels her stomach churn as she offers Eunsang a slight smile. Guilt was consuming her.

***

7:00AM

Suzy pushes through the front door and falls into the ground, “Eunsang!” Soojung shouts repetitively after she runs out from the lounge room, “Eunsang, help me!” Soojung cried out loudly.

The maid came rushing to her side quickly as they helped her swiftly up the stairs, “Guys, I’m fine,” Suzy hiccupped as she spoke. Her breath reeked of alcohol but this wasn’t Suzy being too drunk, no her eyes were blood shot, she had taken something. “I’m fine,” she lies and Eunsang and Soojung exchange knowing looks.

“What did you take?” Soojung demands an answer whilst Suzy covers her ears like a child and buries herself under her sheets. “You can’t sleep! I’m not going to let you go to sleep till you tell me what you took!”

“Soojung, just shut up ok!” Suzy lashes out. The concoction of drugs she had mixed herself was still flowing through her system and Suzy just wanted to sleep. “Let me sleep,” Suzy said as she curled up into her sheets.

Soojung digs her heels into the ground and clenches her fist, she pulls Suzy’s limp body roughly out of her bed and pulls and pushes her into the bathroom. Soojung holds onto Suzy like a child as she turns on the tap to let it fill up the tub. She pulls onto her shirt and yanks it upwards but Suzy keeps fighting her so Soojung fights harder. “Suzy, stop, let me help you.”

“I don’t need your help, I’m fine, I don’t need anyone’s help,” Suzy whines and collapses onto the floor in protest. Soojung taps her foot impatiently and grabs the showerhead and sprays Suzy with cold water. The other girl cries indignantly, “It’s cold, Jung! It’s cold!”

“Get up!” Soojung hisses and pulls Suzy up and pulls down her pants. “Get into the tub!” she instructs promptly and Suzy doesn’t want to but when she sees Soojung reach for the shower head Suzy quickly climbs in. “Sit in here and wake up,” Soojung hissed and stormed out of the room. She left the door ajar so that she could keep an eye out for Suzy as she dialled for Jongin and Sehun.

The phone rings once and immediately Jongin picks up. Soojung holds her breath for a second at the sound of his voice and eases back into her skin, “She’s home, you can come if you want. I’m trying to keep her awake – I don’t know what she took. She’s not throwing it up.”

“Stay there, Sehun and I will come over.”

With the click of her phone Soojung turned back around and walked into the bathtub where Suzy sat stoically, hand floating over the water in a daze. “Suj?” Soojung asked as she approached slowly and carefully.

Suzy blinked once, and then twice but she doesn’t respond. Instead Soojung grabs a hold of Suzy’s apricot shampoo and tips it into her hand and lathers it onto the girl’s head. Soojung remembers the time when Suzy had found her at her weakest after she had just purged all the contents from her stomach forcefully. She was always the strong one out of them, and Soojung wasn’t quite sure if she was ready to play caretaker should anything happen to Suzy. There was a reason Sehun adored her, why Jongin loved her and why Hyeri spoke to highly of her.

“It hurts,” Suzy says candidly, her voice echoing in the tiled room.

“Where?” Soojung asked wearily, “Tell me.”

“Everywhere,” Suzy says and pulls her knees closer to her body.

Soojung her hair gently, washing away the stench of alcohol with the smell of apricot. She carefully washes away the shampoo in her hair with warm water and she notices how Suzy shudders when she touches her. Soojung bites her lip and soldiers on, she was fighting for both of them right now and she needn’t cry.

“Just soak up ok, wake up, you’re going to be fine.” Soojung wipes her hands dry and walks outside. She collapses onto Suzy’s bed, she needed rest since she hadn’t slept last night, just for a second. She glanced at the clock with blurry eyes, just for a second she swore as she closed her bleary eyes and held back her tears.

The doorbell rings and Soojung opens her eyes, Eunsang would let the boys in. She leaps out of bed, she had only closed her eyes for five minutes but five minutes had gone by and Suzy wasn’t out yet. “Suzy?” Soojung asked, the silence was a bit eerie. “Suzy are you awake?” Soojung asked. Soojung rushed inside and found her lying at the bottom of the bathtub with her eyes closed and hands crossed over her chest. Her heart sank to the pit of her stomach, her eyes welled up with tears, “Bae Suzy!” Soojung shouted and dipped her whole body in as she pulled her limp body out of the tub.

***

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend 
Somewhere along in the bitterness 
And I would have stayed up with you all night 
Had I known how to save a life

Thank you all for reading. I hope you enjoy and please leave a comment.
xo