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“Sickle cell anemia,” Changmin said as he nodded his head. “Kyuhyun read everything he could find about it as soon as he came back from your apartment,” he informed.

Hyukjae sighed deeply. It had been just a week and he had nothing else to do but wait for Kyuhyun and come back to work for his father. “Did you understand what it was about?” he asked as he drank from his cold tea.

Apparently, Kyuhyun had asked Changmin to go visit Hyukjae everyday for the two months he would leave and make sure the smaller ate well and was completely warm. “A little…,” Changmin admitted. “I just know that it causes a lot of pain.”

Hyukjae hummed and chuckled. “My blood cells aren’t round, so they stick together and block my vessels, that’s what causes pain,” he said.

Changmin opened his eyes and nodded. “That explains it better than those articles I read.”

“Sometimes I have crisis of pain and when my lungs can’t take it any longer it’s called acute chest syndrome, that’s how my mom died,” Hyukjae said, pushing his glass aside and resting against the hospital’s bed. “I’m tired…,” he mumbled, closing his eyes.

“I’ll leave you alone, then,” Changmin said.

“Changmin,” Hyukjae called when the taller was at the door and he opened his eyes, looking at the other pleadingly. “Do you really don’t know where he is?”

Changmin smiled apologetically. “I really don’t,” he said. “Sleep well, Hyukjae.”

Hyukjae simply hummed, watching how the tall male went out from his hospital’s room.

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“We have a donor, Hyukjae,” his doctor, or better said, his uncle Joon, informed him with a wide smile. “It’s compatible with you, I’ll schedule the surgery for tomorrow night, so be ready.”

Hyukjae didn’t have time to process the entire information but he knew it was good because his father was grinning widely and his step mother was smiling, sweetly, as always.

“Hyukjae, did you hear?” his father asked, shaking his shoulder gently.

Hyukjae looked up and nodded slowly. “A donor…,” he mumbled.

“Yes, Hyukjae, a donor,” his father laughed happily. “We must celebrate this day.

Hyukjae only hummed, nodding his head before a soft smile grew up his lips. Maybe, if everything went well, he would be able to see Kyuhyun and tell him he was healthy again and that he wouldn’t have to leave his side form days, as he used to before. He would be able to run and walk all by himself and go as high as Kyuhyun wanted to take him. He wouldn’t need the oxygen mask every time he went up a plane and he would be able to stay awake even more to enjoy their time together instead of sleeping halfway.

The soft smile grew into a wide grin as Hyukjae felt his body tremble in excitement. There were so many things he could do by Kyuhyun’s side if he was completely healthy that he started missing the other even more. Even if it had been just a little more than a week.

Hyukjae looked down at his arms. There was a probe connected to his veins, feeding his nerves with drugs so the pain would cease partially. He closed his eyes, hearing his father’s voice thanking the heavens for such miracle and he leaned back again, breathing in and out deeply. He wondered how it would be, breathing deeply and feeling his lungs free. He smiled at the thought.

Hyukjae wanted to tell Kyuhyun so much.

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The day went by too quickly and when the night was coming, Hyukjae couldn’t help but tremble in nervousness. “What if it goes wrong?” he asked himself as he waited for the nurse to prepare him for the surgery. “What if my body rejects the transplant?” his face went paler and his legs dumb by just thinking about it. “What if I can’t be there when Kyuhyun comes? What if he thinks I didn’t wait for him?”

His heart was beating faster and he had to convince himself to calm down and that everything would go alright. But deep inside was still the seed of fear that told him that something could go wrong, that maybe he could stay sick for the rest of his days and Kyuhyun would have to carry him around all the time.

The autohypnosis didn’t work and Hyukjae started panicking. He could feel the familiar pain of his legs and chest and he tried to calm down, but the more he talked to himself, the more he panicked. “Alright, Hyukjae,” he talked to himself, closing his eyes and breathing in and out deeply.

Calm down, squirrel. Hyukjae smiled as he heard Kyuhyun’s voice in his mind. Everything will be alright. We’ll do fun things later.

Hyukjae didn’t know a voice could have such calming effect on him. He smiled and opened his eyes, looking around the room and sighing softly as he saw the doctor approaching with another doctor who he thought, was the surgeon that would work with him. “Hello, Hyukjae,” the stranger smiled. “I’m Doctor Lee, nice to meet you, I’ll be your surgeon.”

Hyukjae smiled back and nodded. “Please take care of me,” he said, and even when he wanted his voice to sound firm, it didn’t.

Doctor Lee chuckled softly. “Don’t worry, Hyukjae, we made a lot of different tests, we’re sure your body will welcome the transplant.”

Hyukjae bit his lip and nodded slowly, ignoring the fact that his heart was beating harshly against his chest. “I hope so…,” he whispered.

The nurse came in and started preparing the probe and the drugs they would use in him. Hyukjae could only see how the doctor gave the nurse indications he didn’t have an idea what they were about. “Tell me Hyukjae,” Doctor Lee started softly and Hyukjae was sure the other just wanted to distract him from thinking the worst. “Do you have plans from when you go out from the hospital?” he asked gently.

Hyukjae smiled. He liked the question. “I do,” he said. “I plan on seeing my boyfriend,” he informed.

Doctor Lee laughed softly. “I hope I knew him,” he said. “He’s one lucky man to have you by his side.”

Hyukjae smiled softly and nodded, looking at the nurse taking away the small blanket covering his body. “Actually, he’s Loki to have me,” he grinned widely, not caring how the doctor looked at him weirdly.

Hyukjae was sure Kyuhyun would have laughed loudly at that.

“Alright, Hyukjae, it’s time, are you ready?”

Wrong choice of words, Hyukjae decided, because his heart started beating fast and erratically against his chest. He was sure it was pathological already. “No… I’m not…,” he admitted, gasping softly as the bed moved slightly, looking back at the male nurse dragging him out. Was he really that distracted to not notice the man?

Doctor Lee laughed softly. “I have to change my clothes, so I’ll see you there, alright? You’ll meet doctor Kim in there, your anesthesiologist, he’ll explain everything to you about your surgery.”

Hyukjae simply nodded, sighing deeply as he closed his eyes. He could see his father and his step mother in the waiting room. They had greeted each other already and Hyukjae had to kick them out because they looked nervous as hell and their movements were making him panicked.

“Hyukjae!” He heard Changmin’s scream. “Good luck! I’ll wait right here!”

Hyukjae couldn’t help himself but laugh softly.

As soon as he went into the operating room, he was explained how the anesthesia would work and how they would put it on but Hyukjae didn’t understand a thing and he simply nodded absent minded.

Everything was white. “Count to ten with me, Hyukjae,” doctor Kim ordered and Hyukjae closed his eyes slowly, feeling his body sleepy. “One.”

It was hard to even open his mouth. “One…”

“Two, Hyukjae you have to count until you can’t anymore,” doctor Kim ordered.

“Two…,” Hyukjae was sure it wasn’t understandable.

“Good, Hyukjae, you’re doing good, three.”

Hyukjae couldn’t feel his legs. “Three…”

“Great Hyukjae, four,” doctor him said and Hyukjae realized he also couldn’t feel his fingers.

“Four…”

Doctor Kim caressed his head, covered with a surgical bonnet. “Five.”

“F-Fi-… ve…,” Hyukjae couldn’t feel anything at all and the last thing he knew about the world was that he never heard the number six.

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“Hyukjae,” his name was called but he was unable to move his eyelids to open his eyes. “Hyukjae, can you hear me?”

He could hear him, he even recognized the voice as doctor Kim’s, but he couldn’t bring himself to open his mouth and say he heard it, clearly.

A few minutes passed before his name was pronounce again and he let out a soft sigh as he opened his eyes slowly, getting used to the white light. “Hyukjae?”

“Mmh?” Hyukjae could only hum, because he still felt dumb and his body was heavy. Kyuhyun would be proud.

Doctor Kim smiled at him. “You did great Hyukjae, we’re done,” he announced before turning towards Doctor Lee. “All yours,” he said to the other before going away and the next face he saw in front of his was Doctor Lee’s with a  wide smile.

“Hey Hyukjae,” dr. Lee smiled. “How do you feel?”

Hyukjae cleared his throat, moving his head slightly away from the light. “Nothing,” he barely whispered. “I feel nothing…”

“That’s great,” the doctor said happily. “We are done with the surgery. Everything has come out perfect, I’ll announce your parents and friends about it while the nurses take you to your room to rest and later I’ll visit again to give you blood transfusions,” he explained. “You did great, Hyukjae.”

Hyukjae really wanted to ask what he did so great that everyone complimented him that much. Or maybe it was just something doctors used to do all the time?

Hyukjae really didn’t care about anything as he fell asleep again and the next time he woke up he was in the intensive care unit. One of his arms was connected to a small bag as the other was connected to another.

He sighed deeply. He knew about those kind of transfusions and he liked the idea of them. If he had a healthy bone marrow, he would produce healthy cells. They needed to get rid of the defective ones.

The thought of everything in his body not being his own didn’t bothered him at all. He was happy and he felt great. The next thing he had to worry about was for his body to not reject the transplant.

Closing his eyes again, Hyukjae sighed tiredly. A sharp pain crossed his entire body and he flinched, whining softly as he bit his lower lip.

After a few minutes, the nurse came and gave him a pill that would help with the pain without making him sleepy and Hyukjae took it gladly, sighing deeply after a few minutes that he could finally breathe deeply.

They waited until the exchange transfusion was over and Hyukjae was feeling better to let their father come in. He smiled weakly, though he didn’t want to. He didn’t have energy and he only wanted to sleep. “How do you feel?” Kangin asked.

“I’m great,” Hyukjae smiled softly. “Just a little sleepy…”

“I’ll let you sleep,” Kangin smiled and caressed Hyukjae’s cheek softly.

Hyukjae hummed and closed his eyes, smiling weakly. He didn’t realize when his father left or how long he slept.

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