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“What?” Kyuhyun asked, leaving the spoon filled with cereal and milk midair.

“You have a date tonight,” Hyukjae repeated, eating his cereal happily.

Kyuhyun let his spoon down and frowned deeply, looking at Hyukjae. “What are you talking about? I thought we-”

“You promised me one more date,” Hyukjae interrupted, looking up at Kyuhyun innocently. “Remember?”

“Yes,” Kyuhyun groaned. “But that was before-”

“A promise is a promise,” Hyukjae nodded. “Now hurry, I promised her I would make sure you dress nicely and we need to go out to buy clothes for you.”

Kyuhyun frowned deeper, pressing his lips together as he saw how uninterested Hyukjae was. It was as if he didn’t care about their kiss from before. “Hyukjae, I don’t know if you realized it or not, but I actually-”

“Promised me to go on a new date,” Hyukjae finished. “Now eat so we can leave, slave.”

Kyuhyun groaned in annoyance. “Are you really going to be like this?” he asked and he looked down at his own cereal.

“Yah, how can you be so cruel to your master? I’m being nice here trying to find someone nice for you. Yoona is not only pretty, she also is kind and funny,” Hyukjae said, though he couldn’t hide the stink of pain crossing his body. “You’ll like her,” the words were pronounced so firmly that even he would have believed them.

“Whatever,” Kyuhyun mumbled angrily, still frowning as he ate the rest of his cereal.

Hyukjae looked at Kyuhyun and bit his lip harshly, looking down at his own cereal and realizing he wasn’t hungry anymore. He didn’t eat further, and Kyuhyun didn’t insist him to do it. It felt wrong.

For the very first time in the time they had been together, Kyuhyun and Hyukjae fell in an awkward silence.

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“This one will be good,” Kyuhyun said as he handed the suit he just tried to the saleslady.

Hyukjae simply nodded, sitting down on the small chair. He didn’t see how it was or if it was fit for Kyuhyun because the taller didn’t show him and he didn’t have the guts to ask him to do so.

“Let’s go,” Kyuhyun ordered as soon as he paid and he waited for him so they could go out together.

Kyuhyun took Hyukjae to eat to a nice restaurant and ordered for the both of them. He wasn’t joking, even when he smiled at Hyukjae from time to time. “What did you order?” Hyukjae asked softly and Kyuhyun smiled softly.

“It’s a surprise,” Kyuhyun said, tearing his gaze apart from Hyukjae and instantly losing his smile.

Hyukjae felt his chest tighten painfully. Kyuhyun was mad, he could tell easily. And it was because of him, but he was sure it was for the better.

The food came and they ate silently. Hyukjae glanced towards Kyuhyun from time to time and his eyes stank with tears forming. He had to close his eyes for a few seconds and breathe in and out deeply before looking down at his plate. Kyuhyun was frowning and the taller only smiled when he looked at Hyukjae, as if it was forced.

The food looked delicious, but Hyukjae didn’t enjoy even a bit of it. “Do you not want more?” Kyuhyun asked as he looked down at Hyukjae’s barely touched plate.

“I’m not hungry,” Hyukjae said, and it wasn’t a lie. He wasn’t hungry. He had nausea and he wanted to throw up, his chest was hurting and his legs seemed like they would give up any second.

“Are you sure?” Kyuhyun asked. “You look sick, do you want me to take you to the hospital?”

Hyukjae shook his head and pushed his plate away. “Just… let’s go home…”

Kyuhyun sighed and nodded, calling for the waited to bring their bill. As soon as he paid, they stood up and walked to the car.

Hyukjae felt even worse as he saw how Kyuhyun opened the door for him. He didn’t change his habits at all, but it felt different. He didn’t want Kyuhyun to be as always. It hurt and Hyukjae hated it. He wanted Kyuhyun to talk to him and tell him he didn’t want to go to that date and that he only wanted to be with Hyukjae.

The pain in his chest was increasing. “We’ll go to my apartment, since it’s closer,” Kyuhyun said gently. “Then we can go to that date.”

Hyukjae nodded, breathing in and out deeply and silently. “Do you have plans for tomorrow?” he asked, smiling softly. It hurt.

“Of course I do,” Kyuhyun chuckled. “And even if I didn’t, isn’t the point just enjoy? We can do anything as long as it’s something you wouldn’t do normally.”

Hyukjae smiled wider and hummed, nodding. “I’ll take a nap before your date,” he said. “I’m a little tired.” And my body hurts.

“Alright,” Kyuhyun simply said.

They went into Kyuhyun’s apartment and Hyukjae went to silently rest on the taller’s bed, letting space just in case the other would like to join. He closed his eyes and slept almost instantly, only waking up when he heard Kyuhyun’s voice calling for him.

“Is it time already?” Hyukjae asked slowly, sitting up as he rubbed his eyes. He had been having trouble with those eyes lately. He made a mental note of going to the ophthalmologist later.

“Yeah, do you want to take a shower before leaving?” Kyuhyun asked softly.

Hyukjae shook his head and finally looked up at the taller.

Kyuhyun was stunning. He looked perfect in that combined suit. His hair was messy and stylish and the pants fit perfectly around his thighs. Hyukjae recognized that feeling. He was jealous. Jealous because Kyuhyun had never dressed up so nicely for him before.

“No, I don’t, it’s you the one going to the date, not me,” Hyukjae said, faking a soft smile as he stood up.

Kyuhyun hummed and walked to the door. “Let’s go, then, so I won’t be late.”

Hyukjae felt it again, the stink of pain crossing his chest. It was getting worse.

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Kyuhyun’s plan was simple. He would come in, greet the girl called Yoona, maybe have a drink, and tell her that he was already interested in someone else. Then, he would take Hyukjae out on a dinner together and he would confess to the smaller that he liked him.

He looked through the glass wall of the luxurious restaurant and watched Hyukjae sitting on a bench in the park just in front of him.

He sighed deeply. The day had been tiring and he had hated acting cold towards Hyukjae. It was just that the smaller didn’t seem to understand how he felt and for a second, Kyuhyun actually thought Hyukjae didn’t like him back. What if he was rejected and ruined everything.

Panic started growing within him. What if I ruin it? What they had was already beautiful. He could be close to Hyukjae and make him smile and laugh. He could go around the world by his side and he didn’t anything else. What if by confessing to Hyukjae, the smaller decided to just back away and leave him all by himself?

Kyuhyun wasn’t sure he wanted to take the risk.

Hyukjae was already too important for him as to lose him so easily like that.

Kyuhyun’s train of thoughts was interrupted as a beautiful lady stood in front of him and he stood up almost instantly, smiling gently. Hyukjae was right, the girl was indeed beautiful. “Hello, I’m Cho Kyuhyun,” he introduced himself as he surrounded the table to pull the chair out for Yoona.

“Im Yoona,” the girl said, smiling softly.

Kyuhyun smiled back and went to his seat, calling the waiter so they could get a nice glass of wine. “Hyukjae has talked a lot about you,” he said and Yoona smiled brightly.

“I hope they are nice things,” the girl said happily.

Kyuhyun smiled, glancing one more time towards the bench Hyukjae was sitting alone. “They are,” he said and turned towards Yoona again, smiling softly. “All good things.”

It was in that second, that Kyuhyun decided he wasn’t going to risk everything he had with Hyukjae by confessing. He could live with his feelings hidden. It’s better this way.

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Hyukjae looked at the table where Kyuhyun and Yoona were sitting. He felt his chest hurt even more than before and he took his hand closer to press it tightly. Why did it hurt so much? He closed his eyes for a few seconds and tried to breathe evenly. He hated feeling that way.

It was only after a few minutes that Hyukjae felt something against his lap and he opened his eyes abruptly, realizing that his tears were sliding down his cheeks already. “No…,” he shook his head as he dried his tears furiously. “I decided this,” he nodded for himself. “It was me the one deciding, he had no choice…”

He looked at the couple again and he felt his chest tighten even more. They were laughing together as they ate happily. Even when Kyuhyun laughed loudly with him as well, Hyukjae felt jealous. The taller didn’t laugh for him the entire day while they were together, but he was laughing freely now. It only meant that it was Hyukjae the one who got him bored or annoyed, he would never know.

Something hit his lap again and Hyukjae frowned. It wasn’t his tears anymore. He looked up and gasped, noticing more drops of water were falling down slowly. “Why now?” He asked, sighing as he tried to look around for somewhere to protect himself from the water.

He stood up and walked around the park, deciding to only stay under a tree. He leaned slightly by his side and he could still look at Kyuhyun and Yoona eating happily, not noticing the change of the weather.

Hyukjae was wondering if he should go and interrupt, because he had no idea where the car was and he needed a refugee. The drops were getting bigger and faster, which only meant it would get worse and he didn’t even have a jacket to protect himself.

But he didn’t want to leave. He wanted to be there for when Kyuhyun went out. He wanted to hear the ‘not my type’ from Kyuhyun’s lips.

Hyukjae kept looking to the couple from behind the trunk of the tree. He wasn’t sure if Kyuhyun could see him or not, but he was sure the taller didn’t glanced for him, not even once in at least three and a half hours. He was soaked already and his chest was feeling heavier. It was getting hard to breathe.

He saw how Yoona stood up and how Kyuhyun dedicated her a gentle and wide smile before taking out his cell phone and paying the bill.

Hyukjae smiled softly as he heard his phone ring and he quickly answered, wishing Kyuhyun couldn’t hear the noise the heavy rain was making. “Hello?”

“Hyukjae,” Kyuhyun called from the other line, Hyukjae could see how the other, told something to the waiter. “Are you still waiting?” He asked.

Hyukjae frowned. Why wouldn’t he be waiting? He has always waited for Kyuhyun before. He was about to open his mouth to speak when he heard Kyuhyun talking again.

“I’ll take Yoona home,” Kyuhyun announced and Hyukjae felt his chest contracting in pain. “Do you want me to take you home first?”

Hyukjae closed his eyes. There was a knot in his throat and he didn’t want Kyuhyun to realize it. “No, it’s ok,” he said, breathing in and out deeply and silently. “I’ll go to my dad’s house,” he said. “It’s near here and I wanted to visit him ever since we came back from Tanzania, so it’s ok.”

“Alright,” Kyuhyun said. “Send me a text as soon as you reach there,” he ordered. “Don’t forget.”

Hyukjae smiled weakly. “I won’t,” he said. “I’ll text you as soon as I step into his house.”

“Good,” Hyukjae smiled as he saw Kyuhyun smiling. “I have to hung up now, see you tomorrow.”

Hyukjae was about to answer when he heard the line gone and he looked up. Kyuhyun wasn’t smiling because he was talking to him. He was smiling because Yoona was in front of him already.

Hyukjae had to make sure they were gone before stopping a taxi, breathing heavily as he jumped in. “S-Seoul’s Hospital…,” it was a mere whisper with a hoarse voice. “Q-Quick…”

The tears were storming out from his eyes and his face was becoming paler. It hurts. He couldn’t control it anymore. It hurts so much.

Screams and cries from pain filled the taxi, mixed with loud sobs and tears.

Hyukjae was half conscious when he arrived to the emergency room.

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