After ending the call, I stood up and left the bar. The bouncer, whom I earlier walked by, assisted me as I stood up, but to his surprise, I wasn’t tipsy. I could still walk straight, and the large amount of alcohol I drank didn’t have any effect on me.

I paid for my drinks and left. Before I stepped out of the bar’s door, I took a glance of what is now a wasted guy lying on the ground. I could still see misery in his eyes despite the fact that I’m already standing way far from him.

I could feel pity for him because I have gone through the same situation in the past.

It was when I entered my car that I realized that my life isn’t the only one being so miserable. I am not the only one suffering from a heartbreak.

Maybe it’s time for me to move on. Maybe it’s time for me to let go of him... of us.

A smile formed in my lips after that realization. I was happy because this is the only time that I thought about this thing in the span of six months.

But is this really the time?

.

.

.

.

Just like all the sleepless nights I had for the past few months, I couldn’t really find the sleepy feeling inside of me.

My mind is still bugged by the thought of this time being the right time for me to let go of my past, move on and forget about the tragic ending of my what used to be a fairytale-like relationship.

Psh.

DONGHAE'S POV

I arrived at school having a very heavy head. Stupid hangover. I was so depressed last night that I wasn’t able to control myself from drinking so much. Is it because of my hangover or people around me are looking at me? As I was walking down the corridors of our school, all eyes were on me. It felt somewhat awkward, since I'm not used to this much attention. I didn't know changing the way I looked would gather this much attention from the people.

You see, the old me was always ignored. The only time they would lay their eyes on me is when I accidentally bump them or when they want me to answer their homeworks. Well, you could say that the only time they pay attention to me is when they bully me or when they need something from me.

Back then, I was a "nerd".

Having thick-lensed glasses.

 Wearing unfashionable, out-of-trend clothes.

You probably get the image.

But despite that image I had, I still have friends.

The popular ones to be exact. They were the opposite of me. I don’t even know how we were able to get along with each other despite those difference, but I guess that’s what makes our friendship a real one, right?

Hyukjae, or as his fangirls would often call him as "Eunhyuk”, the lead male dancer of our school's dance club and is also known as the "Dancing King", is my best friend since kindergarten.

Siwon, a Casanova, but he's not the typical type of casanova who would  just make out with girls. And believe it or not, he hasn't kissed anyone. How ironic, right? He' just the type of casanova who likes to flirt around with any pretty girl in sight. Let's just say that he's the casanova with a heart because I know he has his permanent target, but doesn’t have the “balls” to confess.

Kyuhyun, another casanova. He's the same type as Siwon. You know, the 'casanova with a heart' type. He never tried to do erted actions to those girls he had dates with. And this casanova also has a shocking secret, he's in love with someone. I don’t know why these guys have the guts to date other girls, but never had the guts to approach the girls they liked. Tss.

I can hear whispers from the people around me.

“Who's that guy?" "Is he a new student?" "A transferee?" and so on...

Tss. Is my transformation really that.... uhhhmm.. different that no one could recognize me?

Oh I forgot. No one knows me anyway. It’s just today that they started seeing me. (-_-)

While I was walking in the part of the hallway where people would usually intersect with one another, the person who's responsible for my change just passed by.

She's with another guy.

With the arms of the guy wrapped around her waist, laughing like they heard a very hilarious joke.

I stopped walking and was about grab her by the hand, but the past suddenly played on my mind.

~Flashback~

I was holding a bouquet of flowers to give to my girlfriend since it's our 7th-month anniversary or monthsary.

We don't usually celebrate this type of occasion since our relationship... is somehow kept as a secret. Yeah. It’s hidden from everyone except... the two of us and our friends.

But since she texted me to go to our usual dating place, I thought she wanted to celebrate it this time.

I entered the coffee shop with a smile plastered on my face, showing how excited I am
 

Hoping that what I was thinking is correct

My eyes were searching for her, then I spotted her sitting near the glass window.

I reached the place where she was sitting, I handed the bouquet of flowers and was about to kiss her cheeks, but she distanced her face.

I looked at her, but she just avoided my gaze.

I found it unusual , but I tried to understand. I just thought she wasn't in a good mood, or maybe it’s because of the ‘girl thing’.

Her expression isn't as jolly as it normally is. Her face is full of seriousness.

"Jagiya, are you alright?" I asked as I took the seat in front of her.

"Neh. I.... I have something important to tell you." she said.

Because of the way she looked at me, I felt scared.

"Jagiya. Stop the act. Are you trying to surprise me on our monthsary?" I jokingly said as I laughed uneasily. I was hoping that she would laugh, or just even smile.

Unfortunately, she didn't.

But instead..

She said

"Let's break up."

That statement made me so shocked. It made my world stop, it felt as if earth stopped rotating.

"But Jagiya.. waeyo?" I asked in a confused tone.

"Hae. Don't ask any more questions. Let's just break up and end this." she said, still avoiding my gaze.

"Yoona, please tell me you're just kidding. Please.. please tell me it's just a joke. Hahaha. Is this one of your pranks? Okay guys, Eunhyuk! Siwon! Kyuhyun! You can come out now!", I shouted and forced a laugh, but tears were threatening to come out.

"No, Hae! Don’t make this a joke. I don't have feelings for you anymore. Let's just end this." she said with finality then stood up and left the coffee shop, leaving me dumbfounded.

speechless...

depressed...

stuck in the thought that the girl I love left me.

Instead of heading straight to my house, I headed straight to the nearest bar.

It was seven in the evening, but there were many people there already.

The moment I reached the bar counter, I started to drown myself with alcoholic beverages, ordering the drinks with high alcohol content.

At that time, I didn't think about my liver and how I'm going to damage it by doing this.

I just want to be numb....

to not feel this excruciating pain in my heart.

Maybe because of the extreme amount of alcohol I had taken in, my vision became blurry...

and then... everything was covered with darkness.

~End of Flashback~

After that event, I promised myself..

I made myself believe that love…

that thing doesn’t really exist.

It’s just an illusion made to make us feel pain..

After going through that pain, you’ll just realize that love is not supposed to be part of one’s life.

I changed myself not because I’m bitter about the break up and I want her to come back, but to change myself into someone no one thought I could turn into.

I want to show her what she had lost.

Okay maybe part of the reason why I changed is because I’m bitter, but anyway…

I didn’t continue my plan to grab her and try to talk to her.

One word is enough for a wise man, and I know I’m not stupid enough to hurt myself again by pushing myself to someone who doesn’t have any bit of care for me anymore.

I finally decided that what’s finished is finished.

She was the one that ended our relationship, and I’m pretty sure I’m not the one who’s going to regret it in the end.

If she expects me to come running after her,

Tss. IN HER FREAKIN’ DREAMS.

I’m not like those dumb guys who still chases after those girls who left them.

One night of drinking in that bar is enough for me to get over her.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I ignored everyone who tried to come to me and ask me who I was, am I a transferee and whatsoever.

They’re so annoying. I could now have a conclusion that people really do judge people based on their appearance. Tss.

Finally, I reached our classroom. Tss. But there were still a lot of people staring at me..

Another set of questions and conversations echoed inside the room.

“Why is he sitting on the nerd’s seat?” “Maybe he’s an exchange student?” “Let’s ask his number.” “I’d like to make him mine.”

I got pissed by the noise. Since I’m not in the mood, I hit the desk of my armchair, and looked at them with an annoyed face.

That totally made them keep their mouth shut.

After I turned my head back to the board, whispers can be heard once again.

Suddenly…..

There was silence…

I turned around, wanting to find out the reason for the sudden silence..

I followed their gazes which lead me to look at the door.

There were five girls standing there, entering the room one by one.

I felt something different when I saw her face. It was a very unusual.

Maybe I’ve gone crazy. Nevermind. ( > . < )

Tss. I might just sleep until the school bell rings.

I leaned both of my arms on top of my desk and used it as some sort of a pillow to support my head.

*Riiiiiiiiing* *Riiiiiiiiiiiiing*

I sat straight in my chair, but I noticed someone was looking at me with a confused look on her face and is also walking in my direction…

But the door swung open then revealed our professor.

She stopped walking and went back to her chair.

That was weird. Why was she starring at me like that?

Tss. Maybe I’m just assuming that I was the one she’s looking at.