“Park Jaebum, I need to talk.” I said to him. Well I can’t ask Gikwang in the first place because he maybe is just an outsider who doesn’t know anything except the fact that I had witness an accident.

“What’s with that serious look on your face?” he asked, chuckling, and patting my head. I shove his hand away and I think he can see my red eyes to prevent myself from crying. “Hey, baby girl, what’s up?”

“What’s with the incident 6 years ago? I can’t remember a thing, and you said it was me bumping my head to the ice rink? You kidding me? Don’t you know the different between ice rinks and asphalt roads? I witness something didn’t I? That made me shocked and had this freakin’ amnesia. Tell me all of it, Jaebum.” I cried. I couldn’t stop the tears from falling. Jaebum hugs me first before he answers.

“I’m not your real brother. You were seeing your parents’ car in an accident. They died. And yes, you were too shocked, then your heart seems doesn’t want to remember it, so your unconscious Mind is taking the memories out of your reach so you wouldn’t have traumas. In exchange, your memories are gone." he said as an opening from this great history of my life.

"I’m originally your nothing. But then I couldn’t leave you alone when I saw you at the hospital. I was approaching you and your eyes were blank. I asked you what’s your name, but you didn’t answer a thing. You were just staring into spaces and before I knew it, you passed out.” He explained, my hair up and down. I’m still crying. The urge to cry doesn’t want to go away. And then he continues.

“I’m so worried I called my parents who were there also, and a doctor to look at you. Then the doctor explained everything, about your parents too. The doctor said he was talking to you before, and you seemed surprised of course, so he left you to calm yourself. He didn’t expect you to pass out like that.”

“………….”

“And when you woke up, you asked, ‘where is it? Who am I?” I wanted to cry when you asked that with such an innocent look on your face, instead, I hugged you and said, ‘You forgot about yourself? About me too? You’re Park Heeyoung and I’m Park Jaebum. I’m your brother, we were skating before, and then you fell and bumped your head. You lost your memories, I see.’"

He gets quiet for a while, seems to think about what to say next, then he spoke up again, "Maybe I pitied you. But I really couldn’t leave you alone. You know, I’ve always craved a baby sister who I can hug and comfort like this. Park Heeyoung is the name I randomly gave to you myself.” He chuckled. How could you…..

“How could you…”

“I’m sorry, I know you’re not real, but I love you as if you’re my sister by blood. You could hate me all you want from keeping the truth and lying all along with that.” He said.

Despite his words, he’s gently patted my head and my back with his hands, still hugging me in. How can I hate you, Park Jaebum? How can I, while you’re so gentle to me? I hug him back, crying and crying. I still haven’t remembered a thing even though he has explained it. He leads me to sit while still hugging me.

“Have… haven’t you ever… hate me?”

“Hate you? Even if I want to, I can’t. You’re just too lovely to be hated. Indeed, my parents’ attention was all for you at that time, but I didn’t mind it because without even realizing, my attention went for you too. You hate me, don’t you?”

“Ha-hate you?! You asked… if I hate you while caressing me gently like this?! Never once crossed my mind I would hate you, Jaebum. I just… disappointed? Why did you hide the truth, why did you take me with you, why didn’t you just throw me away, because I don’t have any reason to live without my parents ain’t I?”

“Don’t say things like that!”

“Yeah, maybe if you didn’t take me that time, the thought would just haunt me for the rest of my life.” I smirked, pitied myself.

“It’s okay…” Jaebum said.