This is actually my exam week, and I'm so occupied by it I didn't have the time to continue the story until now. Told be truth, the exam isn't over yet so please wish me tons of luck! And I get a new subscribers, yeay! Way to go for a beginner like me^^

Just like another days, the guys are having lunch together in the canteen. But now they use their blazer uniform for the winter. Who would have wanted to catch the cold?

“Heeyoungie, you’re participating in the music competition right? Because Suzy, Gikwang, Wooyoung and I are going to participate too, but in the dance course. I think Taecyeon will be a part of his basketball team as well, while Junho will be the striker for the soccer team. As for Chansung, I remember hearing his fangirl that he’s taking a place in martial arts.” Yoseob asked. He brings his head up from the food he was eating and looks at the said person.

“Yeah I am. And right, I almost forgot Taecyeon is the ace of our school’s basketball team. I wonder though, Sungyoung, why you not taking a part in the competition?”

“First, the club president—Seulong I mean—didn’t offer me, and well, I think you deserve it so why not try without me?”

“He announced it in front of and offered everyone.” The younger twin shot a pointed look.

“At least not exclusively offered like you did.” the older shrugged.

“But I think your piano playing is the most beautiful thing.” Heeyoung trailed off. She meant it. Her violin playing would never match to her twin’s piano’s sound. It was always like that even from they were little. That’s what she assumes. But for Sungyoung, it’s never the case. The older from the twin couple thinks her sibling is the most talented person she has ever met if it’s about music. Both could play piano, violin, and guitar. But Sungyoung has only mastered piano so far, while her sibling mastered all those three instruments.

“No it is not. Your violin is better.”

“No. You’re the one who taught me how to play it. You’re better than me.”

“The idea itself is plain stupid. Just because I’m the one who played it first doesn’t mean you couldn’t surpass me.”

“But it’s the truth. I haven’t surpassed you at all.”

“Stubborn brat. That’s just your subjective perspective.”

“You are stubborn too. And don't call me a brat, you old hag.” the younger twin turned her head away. She loves music, yes, and that’s why she participates even though her sibling doesn’t. But she couldn’t quite place it how come she’s the one chosen and not her sibling.

Gikwang suppresses a fit of chuckle, but couldn’t anymore after the stubborn brat words were escaping Sungyoung’s lips. He doesn’t care if the twins were glaring at him, because to his knowledge, he’s not the only one laughing at the same face siblings’ silly argument. He takes one glance at the older sibling after the argument was somehow, amazingly, ended. Still, he couldn’t find exactly where the differences between those two except for their faces.

Sungyoung’s hair falls below her shoulder. Her bangs are clamped above her head, leaving the rest of it covers each of her ears on the side of her face. Her pink lips are moving around elegantly as she has some conversations with the long and straight haired girl, Suzy. They talked about some random things like soap opera, clothes, handsome guys, and how funny a new commercial of their favorite drink turns out. He shakes his head, there’s no way he could understand girls.

Soon enough, he finds Dara is joining them to the random things conversation. She said she just happened to buy that certain beverage yesterday and saw the model of its’ commercial was pretty hilarious. He shakes his head some more, but quietly so they won’t know he’s overhearing them. He looks over to Dara once again. She cut her hair short last week. He thinks she’s cool this way.

He brings his head to the one on Sungyoung’s left. The younger sibling seems yet to notice his glance, thus he continues to do so. The girl has her bangs hanging around, one could guess it is the only dissimilarity the twin have. But their friends know better than that, Gikwang counted. There are somewhat differences between their facial features. If someone looks at it, the circles around their eyes and some areas near them are their faces’ strong point, that’s where dissimilarity lies on them.

Heeyoung has her focus on her meal, she’s not in the mood for a light chat, he observes. He shrugs it off, and shivers run through his body when he realizes something familiar is poking him. Sungyoung’s hand.

“Gikwang-ah, what do you want for drink?”

Yeah that’s right, he’s always like that recently, feeling slightly uneasy at some sudden touches from Sungyoung. Does he like her? But he always thought he likes the other she shares a same face with…

“Uh, sorry, what did you say again?”

“What do you want for drink? I wanna go to the canteen with Suzy, the others have told me their orders, what about you?”

“I’ll pass. Kinda don’t feel like eating or drinking anything right now.” He replied. Sungyoung just shrugs him off, starts to walk towards the canteen’s direction. The younger twin elbows him, and when he turns to face her, he could totally guess what hold behind her smirk. She knows what he was just thinking, and it means trouble.

"You like her." It was a statement. What Heeyoung just said is a statement, not a question.

"No I didn't."

"You didn't. But you do now." She said smugly.

Gikwang would more than love to shove anything to get rid of that irritating smirk of her. He knows now that she assumes he likes her older sibling, it would be more and more troublesome. He sighs in exasperation.

"Shut up, Heeyoungie." He said finally, cutting off the topic. "We'll continue this talk later."

The lessons that day go fast. Without Junsu realizes, he already on his way in the campus corridor ready for coming back home with Nichkhun when he spots someone familiar. A blonde girl with a stylish coat, a stylish scarf, her stylish brown boots, and a stylish pair of jeans, yeah, a stylish person indeed. And the hand bag over her shoulder seems to be a branded one. He pokes the person who has Thailand nationality which is next to him, and nods towards the girl when the said Thai Prince’s attention is on him.

If Nichkhun’s big eyes could get any wider, he has no doubt it would. Jessica. The two boys share their thoughts, looking at each other, wondering if they’re thinking about the same thing. And they don’t even have to make any sound to know what on the others’ mind anyway. Junsu for the second time nods towards the girl again, but this time he tries to ask the younger guy to approach the girl. Nichkhun furrows his eyebrows, a sign he declines to be the one who has to make the first move.

Junsu sighs, groaning his beautiful angelic voice a little, what a pain.

“Jessica?” he greeted nervously. Man, this would be super awkward. The girl turns around, a shock pure written in her sweet, brownies pools.

“Junsu… Nichkhun…” she said in disbelieve. She knows they went to the same school as him but never actually guess she would run into them now, much to her first intention on going to this place.

“Can we talk for a bit?” he asked. Jessica closes her eyes. She should have known better, this is what she wants from several months ago, anyway. She couldn’t back away now. The blond girl sighs.

“Yes.”

“It’s… been awhile.” Junsu said awkwardly. Really now, why does he have to be the one who do all the talking? They decided to talk in the university’s garden, with Jessica sits on the bench and both boys lean against the tree beside it.

“Yeah, not since his funeral, I guess.” The only girl replied. Nichkhun feels sorrow fills in the girl’s chocolate eyes. He knows after all, who’s affected the most by Jaebum’s death, Heeyoung and Taecyeon aside. Uneasiness calm of Jessica’s behavior makes him pity her a bit, though he aware she doesn’t need his pity.

“Are you okay?” Junsu voiced out Nichkhun’s thought. “I mean, I know you never need our pity, but we concern about you anyway. Even I was shaken by his death. It’s been three months I know, but you couldn’t deny the lonely feelings right? You love him. That is a fact, Jessica.”

“I know that damn well, Junsu.”

“You couldn’t keep running away, I’m always certain that he truly loves you too, but you should realize he’s gone. You don’t have to throw your memories with him away, just keep it to yourself and never forget him, that’s the least you could do, no? Then after that, move on. He wants you to be happy.”

“How am I supposed to be happy when he’s not around? Yeah that’s right, when I first met you guys, I hate him the most. But now it all changed, he changed me and my feelings for him, and he just left me alone like that? I love him, Junsu. I’m here to meet you two, and tell you I’ll go to the State. I can’t bear living here anymore.”

Nichkhun’s eyes softened at the girl before him. Her brownies orbs are shining from the tears she was holding up there. She, Jung Jessica was Jaebum’s girlfriend.  They were so close, and he considered them as a cute, adorable pair. Though Heeyoung seems to know nothing about her brother’s girlfriend, he knows Jaebum loved Jessica so much. Maybe Jaebum had his own reasons for not telling his sister.

“You could at least meet his sister.” Nichkhun shrugged, finally letting out his opinion.

“And you expect I’m gonna tell her what? ‘Hey I was your brother ex-girlfriend, well ‘ex’ is just because now he was dead and not here anymore.’ Like that? Of course it’s gonna be so easy, Thai Prince.” Jessica replied mockingly. She shot the said Thai Prince a pointed glare. The tears are still welling up, but she won’t let it fall now in here.

“Come on, don’t be such a sensitive. You know what I mean. The baby sister didn’t know her brother had a girlfriend. Maybe you could share your happiness and sadness with her. After all, she’s Jaebum’s sister, though not by blood, you know she deserves knowing about your existence, and you deserve to be known by her too.”

“I don’t know… I don’t even know if she would accept me, true I was her brother’s girlfriend, but that had been a history now. What if she thinks that I have nothing to do with her and her brother anymore and ignore me? Yeah I’m sure she would do that. It feels really convincing about I deserve it, Nichkhun.”

Before Nichkhun could open his mouth, Junsu stepped closer and said in a rather hurtful tone. “Don’t say about her like that. You have to know her better and you’d give her so much credit more than you’d ever imagine. And I mean really so much more credit, Sica.” He softened a bit, “She has some of his personalities, his clumsiness, his kindness, and mind you, she isn’t the type of person who would shove people away just because she has nothing to do with them.”

Nichkhun secretly sighs. He knows it best how much Junsu looks at Heeyoung as his little sister, moreover after Jaebum’s death, not that Nichkhun is any different, though. He knows everyone in the circle cherishes Jaebum’s little sister. But he isn’t overprotective. Well yeah okay he is overprotective, but not to the extent like Jaebum and Junsu are.

“I’m sorry, I think you’re right.” Jessica said, closing her brown pools elegantly. “I could try to come to her before I got to the State, but even I know it wasn’t possible.”

“When is your flight anyway, Noona?” Nichkhun asked, looking apologetic for the way Junsu had been sulking. He replaces his silence older friend to ask the question instead. He knows Junsu’s mood wouldn’t get him to talk.

“Tomorrow morning, that’s why I said it wasn’t possible. So maybe I’ll talk to her sometimes later when I came back. Is that okay with you? Just… I also haven’t ready to meet her yet.” She said a bit felt guilty, knowing full well she had the wrong saying Jaebum’s sister wouldn’t accept her. She should’ve known better that she certainly would be welcomed, but she’s just too depressed for god’s sake.

“I understand. We understand. Call one of us when you’re arrived there, okay? And take care of yourself while you’re in the State.” Nichkhun replied, smiling gently. Jessica takes that as a last sentence of their conversation and stands up from her seat, wiping her wet eyes weakly. “And when you’re ready, just tell us, we’ll company you to meet her.”

Jessica is glad that Nichkhun is… just… well, Nichkhun. A warm and the softest guy she ever encountered. He respects his parents, his elders, he loves kids, and Jessica knows whoever it is, who will spend the rest of their life with him, they could be considered as the luckiest person in the world. The blond gives the two tall boys her short hugs before waves at them and leaves. She makes mental note for herself to apologize to Junsu later, and also Heeyoung if she meets her.

The cold wind of early winter chills her to the bones, and nostalgic feelings of her and his last Christmas rushing towards her head. As soon as she got to the parking lot and enters her car, she sunk to the dashboard, crying furiously.

Sometimes, just sometimes, she feels like she wants to end all of this and follow Jaebum. But no, Jaebum would be disappointed with her if she did so. No, she’ll try to bear with it. Then maybe someday, she’ll get it over with. Maybe I would, but in a million years. She thought internally. But that’s okay, because she doesn’t even one to completely forget her memories with him. Not until she died.