Chapter 8

Woohyun

Sunggyu could have just punched me right into the face, it would have had the same effect. Or send me into exile to some abandoned abbey in North West Alaska.

Everything...

Just not giving me the shock of my life.

My jaw clamps. Like... literally.

I'm not able to close my mouth again. I wanted to say something but any unnecessary movement and I'll throw up... I'm much more sure about that fact than any other at this morning. I'm so going to throw up. And then hopefully everyone finally knows what I'm thinking about all of it.

The disused office building across the street turned into a hotel over night. Kyuhyun really requested back up. And now the Busan guys are everywhere, blocking the street so no one is able to walk in and out of the street and I have the strange feeling that there are one or two snipers and the roof of the building.

I motion to them with my finger, let my hand sink down again, reach out again only to repeat it once more. A turn, two steps back to the entrance, turning around once more, moving back, examining the mishap again and everything's starting over.

" I don't get it..."

" We can see." Sungyeol says.

"I don't see anything anymore."

This time I keep my arm outstretched when I approach them.

" He dares to occupy that building? He DARES TO?! Like.... right across the street?? I don't get it! Why didn't you tell me sooner?!"

" Because we know you."

I can't find a fitting answer. My mouth opens a few times but no word comes out. Just like a carp, desperately gasping for air at the surface.  I stumble over to Sunggyu who watches me with worried eyes.

"Gyu... I'm officially and for the first time in my life lost for words. In a metaphorical sense, not literally. Because I'm still talking right now. But actually I could just shut my mouth, my words most probably don't make that much sense. At least for you... I'm perfectly fine with them, but..."

"Yes?"

I clutch Sunggyus arm in a desperate attempt to settle my thoughts. "But to be honest.... I don't understand anything anymore. I can't even explain what's happening right now."

Sungyeol gives Myungsoo a telling look. " He'll get hysterical."

" Soon."

" Shut the up.", Sunggyu snaps at them before he turns his attention back to me.

"Don't worry. I'll settle things, okay." He tries to smile but it only drives me more to the edge of crying.

" Woohyun..."

" I... have to do something..."

"No." Sunggyu says firmly.

" Look at this... it's a disaster..."

"Nothing we can't handle. Listen to me and stay here, okay?" his eyes turn into crescents when he gives me one of his warm smiles. But it's not the thing I want to listen to right now.

I take a step back.

" Sunggyu. Just this once. You know how much I don't want to but maybe I can put some sense back into their heads."

" You're not going."

"Gyu... I have to talk to them. I can help. Give me a minute. I talk it out with Kyuhyun and we'll be fine."

"You're not going to help out if it means you betake yourself to them! Got it?!" Sunggyus voice rises and the bystanders discreetly look at the couple.

" Sunggyu... calm down... We can go together and-"

" Come."

" No... we don't--"

"I said COME!"

Sunggyu grasps me more violently than he intended  and leads me into an abandoned alley.

"Let go!"

I jerk myself away, turning my back to Sunggyu  to avoid the latter's angry glare.

"Can you stop this?"

"What?!"

" Pushing me around as if I'm some kind of lowlife to you..."

" When did I?!"

" AND STOP SHOUTING AT ME FOR GODS SAKE!", Sunggyu freezes when my voice rises. " I CAN HEAR YOU LOUD AND CLEARLY!"

I told Sunggyu, so often, when once again he turned into the despot he promised me so often wouldn't appear again.

" Stop talking to me like I'm some imbecile, okay? And stop pushing and pulling me around! This isn't the way you should show me you care!", I massage my hurting wrist, feeling like all of my energy has been drained out of my body.  " If I bother you that much you only have to tell me to leave, you know..."

I didn't mean for Sunggyu to hear my mumbled words but when Sunggyu gasps sharply I know that I might have talked louder than intended.

I slowly lift my head and risk to take a look at him.  

" We both know that will never happen." Sunggyu says, averting his gaze.

I feel a sudden fit of bad conscience .

"Sunggyu..."

" You know I'm not good in the social things." a crooked smile plays on his lips, but when I take his eyes into the picture I can see the sadness behind everything.

Sunggyu ruffles through his hair, showing the uneasiness only I knows Maybe his friends, too, but not to the extent he showed me. He can't be too vulnerable to the world, he always says while his head is resting in my lap, vulnerable to the whole world but content with my fingers brushing through his hair, the only shield at that moment.

"Aren't we a bunch of incapable idiots?" I try to imitate Sunggyus smile but fail and Sunggyu uses the chance and the forgiveness in my voice to approach me.

His cold fingers find their way around my wrist, this time softly and tenderly - nothing compared to the roughness he used a minute ago.

" I can't control myself when I have the feeling my words don't get through."

"I know."

Sunggyu sweeps one of my dark hair strands away and leans his forehead on mine. " You shouldn't know. You're the one who should know the least about that side of me. But...", he leans in a kisses my awaiting lips softly. "... why is it that everything related to you evokes it?"

"Because you like me  a bit more than the others."

" Yes.", Sunggyu pulls me into his embrace. " A bit more. A tiny bit..."

I circle my arms around his waist and feel how I finally calm down.

He's my source of security. And like I'm starving I try to absorb everything. I feel how the warmth spreads inside of me and covers everything.

The nervousness, that keeps me moving all the time.

The anxiety that keeps me talking.

The fear, which blossoms in my chest and invades my whole body.

I've been afraid so often since I've come here. Sometimes it makes me so tired, but Sunggyu keeps me awake. And if the fear was sleep, than I would be wide awake right now, as if I drank a litre of coffee and don't even know what sleepiness is.

"That thing... it developed a life of its own."

I nod slowly and he smiles when he looks at me. " You're paler than Sungyeol after his last bar visit."

"Nothing to be proud of."

Seemingly deep in thoughts he bites his lips.

I have the horrible urge to kiss them.

" I tried to talk to him. I threatened him in every possible way. He's so ed up he didn't even listen. Only because that psycho in the wheelchair wants you."

"That's the problem you have when you choose a pretty boy."

He kisses me again, his lips linger on mine for a second longer than before.

I want more.

"Talk to him."

The urge is gone.

" With Kyuhyun?"

He lets go to take my hands into his. His gaze is serious. " As much as I don't like it but maybe you can tell him how ed up his plans are. As I told you... the emotional level isn't mine."

"You don't like that thought."

"Is it that obvious?"

" Kind of."

"I'm open for other solutions."

I think for a moment. " We could tell them I died."

"That's too macabre."

"Can it get any more macabre? A hotel opened its door across the street. We should demand fees."

He caresses my back. " Still only thinking about money?"

"We have to take care of the future." I answer with a shrug and earn a quiet chuckle. I cup his face and pull him closer.

"I love you." Only a mumble and then I initiate another kiss. It's over far too soon. His face turns serious again. " You think you can do it?"

I nod slowly. " If someone's with me..."

"You honestly think I would let you go out of my sight?"

He pulls his mobile out of his pocket and dials a number after taking a deep breath. " Please don't let me regret this later."

OOO

One hour later

"ARE YOU IN KIDDING ME?!"

" Sunggyu...Calm down..."

I duck my head when my pleads get ignored.

"Calm down?! You should tell him to leave! HE SHOULDN'T CONVINCE YOU TO GO WITH HIM!"

"It's just a week..."

"Just a week... only for a week... this!"

He leaves me alone and stomps down the floor in direction of his room.

"Sunggyu! Wait! I want to tell you ab--"

His door closes with a thud. I wince when I hear him locking the door.

" Leave him alone. He'll be fine." Dongwoo says from behind and beckons me over. I follow him into the kitchen without trying to get Sunggyus attention again. He gets angry a lot of times but I've never seen him like this.

" Tell me about what happened."

"At least you.", I take a seat at the counter. " You know. This was the only thing I could do. We can't let them stay here. Business will go down."

" He most probably hoped you would tell him to handle it his way." he pours me a cup of water and I look at it for a while before

I nod slowly. " I did well."

And then I start telling him the story.