A/N : I did this as a sequel as requested by my readers on  AFF (: Hopefully this is going to be good as compared to the first part of Caramel Macchiato? (: And and, thank you to jetified.com for promoting CM on ff Friday (: Was browsing through jetified.com and well, my jaws just dropped open when I saw CM on the post …

Thank you! Okay here you go!

 

Word Count : 2388

 

Caramel Macchiato II

 

‘Will you hurt the one that you love?’ my younger sister asked.

‘I guess not,’ I replied, almost guilty.

‘Have you hurt anyone you love before, then?’ the younger one looked at me.

‘Yeah, I’d done it before,’ I gave a sad smile.

“What will you do if you were given a second chance?”

“Love her with all my might, to not hurt her at all, not a single bit.”

**

 

I pulled a black tank-top over myself before I covered myself with a buttoned shirt with sleeves rolled up to the elbow. Looking into the mirror, I smiled to myself as if seeing her satisfied grin back towards me, but it was all only imaginary.

I haven’t seen you for 9 months.

I slipped into my sandals as I took a slow and long walk towards the beach. The cold wind blew gently and immediately, I pulled my shirt closer to myself.

I miss her warmth when I’m holding her hand.

I laugh at my own thoughts, who am I to even feel guilty and to miss her? I’d hurt her so much that I guess I wouldn’t even be able to bear the pain if I were her instead.

I deserve it. I surely do.

The waves were crashing against the stones, the sky was teeming with stars. I smiled as I’ve finally arrived at the beach. Nowadays, it’s a must for me to come to the beach at least once in a while, it’s my only escape, only escape from the break-up misery.

But you know what? This place isn’t my own safe haven, it’s our safe haven.

The beach is unusually quiet but I love the peace anyway. I looked up the sky, with stars occasionally blinking at me, and the moon smiling at me.

 

‘Why do you like coming to the beach, doing star gazing?’ I inquired as I see Jessica beaming at the sky.

‘Why do you ask?’ she questioned back, still beaming at the sky.

‘Why did you answer my question with another question?’ I pretended to be crossed.

Jessica turned and gave me a cute smile, ‘I like doing sky gazing because I love to watch the stars blink. I do this a lot whenever we don’t have time to meet.’

‘Why?’ curiousity couldn’t get the better out of me.

‘Because when the stars blink and I see the crescent moon, it reminds me of you. The crescent moon reminds me of your signature eye-smile while the stars seems like you’re winking at me,’ you giggled.

Do you know you’re really good with your words that it makes my heart flutter a lot?

I ruffled my hair as all the bittersweet memories came flooding in. We could have met, but I was the one who was occupied with somebody else. I looked down as the guilt constricted my heart again. That day when you left, I realized I’d closed the door in my heart. Nobody is allowed to enter my heart, even if they’d tried and stolen the key from you.

Only one person is allowed to unlock the door for me, and it’s you. Only you.

I sighed as I stood up, patted my to remove the sand. The lamp post illuminated the road back home but not far away, I saw a blonde lady sitting alone near the shore.

Is that…you?

I walked nearer and nearer until I’m confident that it’s you who is sitting alone.

“Hey,’ I walked closer and placed myself next to you.

You jumped a little, looked at me with curious eyes and gave me a light smile, ‘Hey.’

Even though we are sitting next to each other, there is already an invisible gap in between.

‘What are you doing here, alone?’ I tried my best to start a topic. But I’m really concern, for you to be alone at the beach, it means that you’re troubled, really troubled.

‘I just thought it’s a good timing for me to stargaze,’ you replied, beaming at the sky.

‘Are you… attached?’ I mustered all my courage to ask you, the knots in my stomach tightened.

‘Yeah, with Yoona,’ you looked back at me, smiling. But I saw a mixture of happiness and sadness.

I nodded and smile as a way that I’m happy that you’ve finally found happiness, even though it’s not me you’re with. All I could really do is to smile. Really.

That night I’ve decided to walk you back home, to at least keep you safe and protected a while, something that I haven’t done for the past 4 years.

“Goodnight Tiff,’ you smiled as you greeted me goodbye.

‘Goodnight Jessi,’ I waved goodbye. I love you.

**

‘We should break up,’ I packed my luggage.

‘Why?’ the girl standing next to me, looked at me with disbelief.

‘Because I don’t love you,’ I zipped my luggage.

‘What the actual ? So you mean you’re toying with me these 2 months?’ the girl glared hard.

‘What is toying with you 2 months when I didn’t even realize who I am in love with for 4 years?’ I spluttered.

‘Get out,’ the girl pointed towards the door.

‘Was intending to do so, and I’m currently doing so,’ I pulled my luggage towards the door.

‘And your key,’ I threw the key towards her direction.

‘You’re such a b*tch!’ The girl screamed at the top of her voice.

I am one, an idiotic b*tch who’s broken Jessica’s heart.

**

The next time I see you is during our clique meet up. Our clique hasn’t been meeting up for half a year since our break up for fear that both of us will be awkward and sad, still.

I smiled as I approached the table with Sunny next to me while you and Yoona were next to each other, laughing and giggling.

‘Bitter?’ Sunny whispered.

‘Kinda,’ I mumbled.

‘Told you not to play with her. Now you see her happiness is no longer you,’ Sunny smirked.

‘Can you not…’ I sighed in defeat.

As our food arrived and were neatly placed on our table, our clique began chatting. TaeYeon was still being a ert, saying how some fruits could be related to our chest size, while Yuri slapped TaeYeon on her arms upon hearing that.

‘SooYoung’s one is flat,’ TaeYeon giggled while the whole table was bursting out of laughter. You spat your water out because you were laughing so hard, Yoona patted gently on your back and whipped the corner of your mouth with a tissue, you smiled back lovingly.

My heart sank and I took a sip of water to wash down that invisible lump that was forming in my throat.

The day ended pretty well, except that my heart was clenching and stomach was churning whenever Yoona touches you. Sunny volunteered to walk me home that night.

‘Are you really not planning to do anything to get her back?’ Sunny interrogated.

‘Do I look like I’m able to do that?’ I gave a sad smile.

‘Tiff, you can do it, you know,’ Sunny’s tone was suddenly serious.

‘What are you saying? She has her happiness now, I shouldn’t and can’t be that selfish to rob it away. I’d already hurt her, I can’t do it twice,’ I clenched my fist, suddenly angered.

‘I presume you’re angry with yourself,’ Sunny shrugged it off.

‘How do you know?’ I looked down, guilt-ridden.

‘You’re angry with yourself cause you finally realized you love her a lot. Took you pretty long and a lot to realize that you love Jung though,’ Sunny laughed.

‘Yeah,’ I shoved my hands into my jeans.

‘Anyway, the reason why I’d encouraged you to get her back is because she didn’t look as happy when she is with Yoona as compared to how she was when she was with you. There’s a mixture of emotions in her eyes, of happiness and sadness. So bittersweet,’ Sunny sighed.

‘You can see that too?’ I widened my eyes.

‘Duh, when she was with you, pure happiness is what that is filled in her eyes,’ Sunny mocked.

**

I sat down on my white, polished floor, looking through the items in my pink box.

There consists of letters, bookmarks, photographs of us; things that I wouldn’t want and bear to throw. I smile as I opened our first anniversary card that you’d done for me, you were so excited about it that you’d spent a week searching pink coloured cards, a white envelope and you spent dyas decorating the card for me. I traced your hand-writing as I re-read the content of the card, I felt the happiness in my heart all over again. As long as I’m done going through all the things in the box, I sigh. The happiness just ends there, full stop.

No more happiness, no more exchanging of gifts during our anniversary, no more lunch and dinner dates, no more anniversary, no more you.

--

Free today?

Yeah, what’s up?

Meet you at Holiday café at one. Don’t be late!

Sure!

The pushed open the door of the café and the barista greeted me with his smile. I nodded as I placed my order, ‘Caramel Macchiato please.’

She signaled for me and I found Yoona seated around a small, round coffee table. I gave her a polite smile as I’d placed myself on a chair.

‘Is letting go a kind of happiness?’ Yoona looked at me with her puppy eyes.

‘I… err… I guess so,’ I played with the table cloth near my lap.

‘Don’t be so uptight! I’m just asking,’ Yoona gave a wide grin.

‘Is that the reason why you’d asked me out? Just to clarify a question?’ I asked incredulously.

‘No, haha. I have a question, a real question to ask,’ Yoona looked back.

“What is it?”

“You said letting go is also a kind of love, a kind of happiness, am I right?”

I nodded.

‘Jessica…’ there was a long pause before Yoona continued, ‘I’m letting Jessica go.’

‘Why?’ My eyes doubled its’ size.

‘Because she loves you more than she loves me. I told her I’ll give her time to forget you, but I guess you’ll never be forgotten. It’s fine, at least I loved her and she tried loving me too. Though it was unsuccessful,’ Yoona gave a sad smile.

‘But I… I’m not capable of loving her because I’d hurt her once,’ I spoke softly as the words came out slowly.

‘You are not capable of loving her?’ Yoona raised her eyebrow,’ You’re capable. I know how you feel and look like during our clique outing. You love her, a lot.’

“But aren’t you hurting when you let her go?”

“She’ll be hurting more if I don’t.”

**

 The same place, the same sound, the same light.

The stars are blinking to me, the full moon surrounded by it’s one and only star. And you’re next to me.

‘Don’t you feel sad that you’ve broken up with Yoong?’ I asked carefully.

You gave a shrug, ‘We’ll break up anyway. She loves me while I’m trying to love her. It’s different, you know?’ You turned to me.

I nodded.

“What will you do if you were given a second chance?”

‘T, I…’ you looked at me with a curious gaze.

I grabbed a thin tree branch that had fallen from the tree and I wrote on the sand. ‘Can you please give me a second chance?’

You patted to the ‘seat’ next to you, signaling for me to sit. I complied, half aware that I’ll never be given the second chance, period.

‘What’s your favourite coffee?’ You asked as you beamed towards the sky, yet again.

‘Caramel Macchiato,’ I smiled to the air.

“Why?”

‘Because… because after I broke up with you, I started falling in love with you. It’s kinda funny. I did all the things you like again, wearing buttoned shirt with sleeves rolled to the elbows, re-reading our anniversary cards, going to places that you like and drinking the coffee you love. ‘, I paused before I continued.

“Caramel macchiato that drink by itself is funny. First sip of it, it’s bitter. But it gets better when you keep drinking it. That bitter sweetness will always linger in my mouth even after it’s washed down my throat. The sweetness of the caramel is like our sweet memories, hanging out, meeting for lunch, movie dates. Yet the espresso reminds me of our current state, my current state, that well, I’m bitter without you.”

I forced out a fake laughter as I see the waves approaching, getting ready to wash away my words on the sand.

You too, watched the waves approaching, decided to squat down, took a stick and drew a tick on the sand before it’s completed washed away.

“Love her with all my might, to not hurt her at all, not a single bit.”

I smiled as I hugged you. Tears of happiness rolling down my cheeks as you pulled me closer towards you. The familiar sight, the familiar lavender smell of yours, the warmth, everything. Just you.

‘Don’t let me go anymore,’ you whispered, barely audible.

‘I’ll never let you go anymore, or do anything that seems like I’m letting you go,’ I planted a soft kiss on your forehead.

**

I guess I understand why you’re in love with Caramel Macchiato.

Just like our love, bitter because we had to part away, bitter because I’d let you go, slipping through my fingers, bitter because however much you tried, I just can’t seem to be satisfied.

Yet sweet, because you’re everything I need. Sweet because you gave me another chance, sweet because I finally found who I love.

Our love is bitter sweet. But it doesn’t matter, the bitter will be things we’ll have to take care of, the sweet, well, I promise to make you have diabetes.

 

 

P.S : I hope this story is fine ! Thank you for reading :D And.. comments please!