November 29, 2014

Abigail lay snuggled against her husband, in bed, relishing in the quietness of their room and the house.  Quite different from her parent’s house.  They were always up early and her Dad was usually singing or joking with her Mom.  Sometimes her Dad would get up early for a walk and she, Isabel and Sylvia would go climb into the King size bed with their Mom.  She smiled to herself, as she turned her head to look at her husband.  She had taken Thanksgiving Day off to cook.  She refused to let Esther lift a finger, well within reason.  Her Mother in law and her prepared most of the Thanksgiving Dinner themselves.  As usual, her Dad and other men from the Church prepared a meal earlier in the day, for those that didn’t have anywhere else to go.  In the early evening, her family, Jihoo, and Ilana came over and they all had dinner together.  It was her first holiday as a married woman and Abigail felt blessed that it was Thanksgiving.  She thanked the Lord daily for everything good in her life but to come together with both her families to say ‘Thank You’ for this blessing was enough to make her emotional.  Smiling at herself, she thought Ilana was rubbing off on her.  From time to time, whenever Ilana spoke of Dr. Jihoo, Abigail could see her eyes getting moist.  Her friend was so happy in love with Dr. Jihoo, she was happy for her.  She just prayed that this happiness would lead her to make peace with God soon.

It wasn’t until after they had returned from their Honeymoon that Abigail had questioned her about the bracelet, she had given her.

- “Chica, I’d love to thank your Mom for letting you give me her bracelet.  Next time you call her, will you let me talk to her so I can thank her personally?"

Ilana remained quiet.  They were taking their lunch alone, the guys were tied up.  “I can’t do that.”  This was the third time she’d had to say this in the last two years and it wasn’t any easier.

 - “Chica, don’t tell me you didn’t tell your Mom?  What if she wanted you to wear that bracelet?”

 - “I didn’t ask her...” before Abigail could scold her, she continued.  “...not because I didn’t want to…”  Ilana took a deep breath and closed her eyes, worrying Abigail.

 - “Chica, are you alright?”

Ilana shook her head ‘no’ but then tried to smile.  “I would have loved to ask her but…both my parents were…in an accident…”

Abigail gasped.

 - "…when I was ten.”  Ilana couldn’t help the tears that began to fall.

 - “Ilana!  Why didn’t you say something sooner?”

 - “It’s just easier for me, not to remember.  I’m sorry if…I misled you.”

 - “I’m sorry for your loss,” Abigail hugged her friend and coworker.  “I don’t know why but God must have had great plans for you.”

 - “I’m sorry, chica, I don’t see it that way.”  She told her friend sadly.

 - “I know you don’t but maybe it’s not time for you to see it yet.”

Abigail didn’t know why she had said that but obviously, it was the Lord speaking through her.  “Lord, I know you have your hand on Ilana.  If a single sparrow does not fall from the ground without your knowledge then you also know Ilana’s suffering.  Please, give her peace, Lord.”

They had promised Isabel they’d start decorating the house for Christmas. So Abigail decided to let her husband sleep and sneak into the restroom to get dressed.  She had also been waiting all week, it seemed, for her period to start and didn’t want any surprises when he woke and decided to exercise his ‘husbandly rights’ as they referred to it jokingly around Isabel.  Removing his arm from her waist as carefully as she could, Abigail meant to get up until a strong arm pulled her back down.

 - “Sleep, let me get up and help Esther.”

 - “Anieyo, stay with me.”  He had moved her hair and was nuzzling her neck, then his hands began to climb from her waist up.

 - “Jaejoong, really, let me up.”  He’d begun to massage her s which made Abigail a little uncomfortable.  She didn’t know if it was all the new attention that part of her anatomy was getting or just the forewarning that her period was coming but they were a little sore lately.  She couldn’t bring herself to tell him, she was too embarrassed.

 - “Pay the king’s tax and I’ll let you up.”

Abigail tried removing his hands from her by turning to face him.  She kissed him with bold familiarity, their tongues danced to a song only they knew.  This was a game they played often, her husband was shameless in his attentions to her.   After her disastrous first marriage, she was comfortable with the thought of remaining celibate for the rest of her life.  Her honeymoon reminded her that it wasn't just a physical act, it really was an act of love.  She loved her husband very much and although she was sometimes still shy with him when it came to , he made sure he pleased her each time.  He wasn't a selfish lover like her ex had been.  He was very loving and patient with her as she learned to please him too.  Abigaíl didn't dwell on what her ex hadn't been and just thanked God for the wonderful man He had brought into her life.  In fact, she didn't even ask how Jaejoong was able to adopt Isabel without her biological Father's consent.  It was all done through an attorney and legal.

Jaejoong was already trying to tug off her pajama bottoms when she stopped him.  "I really have to use the restroom."

 - "Arraso but hurry back," he pouted.

Five minutes later Abigaíl had walked out of the restroom and to their closet to get dressed.  She still hadn't started but had all the symptoms of getting her period soon.  She tried to remember when her last period was.

 - "You were supposed to come back to bed," Jaejoong said behind her, making her jump.

 - "You promised Isabel we could decorate, she's going to be in here any minute."

 - "Can't you cuddle for another five minutes?"

Abigaíl laughed, sometimes his whining could be a little cute but she was hungry and refused to give in.  "I'm hungry, I want a turkey omelet."  Her favorite part of Thanksgiving was the leftovers and they made sure to cook enough for turkey sandwiches, enchiladas, and omelets.

Isabel was up watching cartoons with her Grandparents.  "Morning Abeoji, Eommoni, I'm going to make turkey omelets.  Did you eat breakfast?"

 - "Good Morning dear," Mrs. Oh greeted.  "We did eat already but I'll keep you company if you'd like."

 - "Isabel and I will just stay here," Mr. Kim said.  "Esther made her pancakes this morning."

 - "Spoiled, that's what you are."

 - "Isabel is a dear, we'll miss her when we go back."

 - "I know, Abeoji.  Eomonni, are you sure you don't just want to relax?"

 - "Anieyo, I want to spend quality time with my daughter.  My son is still sleeping?"

 - "I think he's getting dressed."

The two woman happily chatted as they chopped vegetables for the omelets.  In some ways, Mrs. Oh was easier to talk to than Abigail's own Mother.  She had been worried that it would be awkward living in the same house but other than weekend mornings and occasionally dinner, their paths didn't cross that much in the large house.

Jaejoong finally walked into the kitchen about ten minutes later.  "Annyeong hasseyo, beautiful ladies."  He kissed his Mother who was the closest, on the cheek, then his wife.

 - "Sit, yeobo, we've got the kale and turkey sautéing with onion and garlic and I'll add some cheese when I pour the egg mix."

 - "Arraso, I'll just make coffee for us."

Abigaíl had a strange feeling in when she poured the egg mix but attributed it to hunger.  It was past ten A.M and usually breakfasted much earlier during the week.  Five minutes later, breakfast was done and Abigaíl added avocado and Cotija cheese to finish the omelets off.

Mrs. Oh had been enjoying a cup of coffee with her son and then excused herself.  "I'll let you two enjoy your breakfast."

 - "Gomawo, this looks good."

 - "You’re welcome."  Abigaíl looking forward to trying her creation took a bite and something went very wrong.  She nearly toppled the chair in her haste to exit the kitchen.

Jaejoong was left confused but snapped out of it and ran after her.  He found her throwing up in the restroom.  "Yeobo, what happened?"  He ran a washcloth under cold water and placed it on the back of her neck.

Abigaíl sat back, suddenly exhausted.  Nausea had come on her so violently.  "I don't know, I took a bite and all of a sudden I felt sick."

 - "Is that it?"  He rubbed her back, trying to comfort her.

 - "I think so." Jaejoong began to help her stand but nausea came again.

A few minutes later, she decided she was done.  Still shaky, Jaejoong kept his wife steady while she brushed her teeth.  "Kaja, back to bed with you."  He felt her forehead, "you're not feverish, at least."

 - "I'm sorry," Abigaíl felt close to tears and didn't understand why.

 - "Wae?  It's not your fault you got sick."

Once in their room, he tucked her back in.  "I'll make butternut squash porridge for you."

 - "That sounds awful, right now."

He laughed and kissed her forehead.  "I'll get it started and bring you some plum tea."

Jaejoong headed back to the kitchen and ran into his Mother.  "Jae-ah, what happened, you kids didn't touch your breakfast."

 - "Abigaíl isn't feeling well all of a sudden, can you help me make porridge?"

Mrs. Oh smiled at what an attentive husband he was.  "What happened?"  She began getting ingredients together for the porridge.

 - "She took a bite of her omelet and threw up."

 - "Chincha?"

 - "Deh."

 - "Jae-ah..."

Jaejoong saw his Mother smiling widely.  "Umma?"

 - "Na don't want to get our hopes up, but...is it possible...?"

 - "What's possible?"

Mrs. Oh sighed at her son.  "Jeongmal, Jae, you're such a namja, even if you are a doctor.  It has been two months since you were married.  Could she be pregnant?"

 - "Oh, mollah?  It's possible."  He began to think, she hadn't turned him away because of a period yet.

 - "I'll make the porridge, you go get a pregnancy test."

Jaejoong laughed at his Mother.  "Umma, I'll take her to the lab on Monday.  An OB is going to want a blood test anyway."

 - "Jae, just get one for peace of mind."

 - "Nothing can be done about it until Monday, even if she is."

Isabel walked into the kitchen.  "Appa!  When can we start decorating?"

 - "Umma apayo, jagiya.  Let me make her porridge and take her tea to make her feel better then we'll decorate.  Go put some warm clothes on and in a while we'll go outside with Harabeoji."

 - "Arraso!"

 - "I'm so excited!  A little sister or brother for Abigaíl."

 - "Umma!"

 - "Take the tea and I'll make the porridge."  When her son, stood there just staring at her, she said more sternly.  "What are you waiting for?  Ka!"

 - "Deh, Umma!"  He began to boil water and retrieved the jar of plum tea from the refrigerator.

When Jaejoong re-entered their bedroom suite, his wife had fallen back asleep.  It was a good thing he thought to pour the tea in a travel mug.  He smiled as he placed the mug on the bedside table.  It was entirely possible she was pregnant.  He was confident, she hadn't had her period since they've been married.  He didn't think that was something he could have missed.  Taking a notepad, he told her to call him if she needed anything.  He gave her a quick peck on the lips and bundled up to go out and get the Christmas ornaments with his Father.

Two hours later Abigaíl made her way back to the main floor of the house.  "Did the Christmas train derail or something?"  There were boxes of ornaments and garland everywhere.

 - "Umma!"  Isabel dropped the bow she was holding and ran to give her a hug.

 - "Abigaíl dear, what are you doing up?"

 - "I'm feeling better now, Eommoni."

 - "Sit Abi-ssi," Esther said.  "I'll bring you a bowl of porridge."  She was already putting down the wreath she was decorating.

 - "I'll get it, Esther."  Now that Abigaíl had taken a nap, she felt much better.

 - "Anieyo, come sit."  Esther and her Mother-in-law were already pulling her to the couch.

 - "Are you warm enough dear?"  Mrs. Oh asked.

 - "Yes, Eommoni.  What can I help with?"

 - "If you're up to it after you eat, put the ornament hooks on these so we can hang up on the garland."

 - "Umma, you're going to make cookies with me later, right?"

 - "Of course, baby." Abigaíl noticed her Mother In Law looking at her with a huge smile on her face.  "Eommoni, are you okay?"

 - "It's just so nice to have a daughter," Mrs. Oh, gushed.  "Jae and his Abeoji are hanging lights outside and garland.  They should be in shortly."

It was about eleven when Jaejoong and Abigaíl had tucked in Isabel, who had finally crashed from too many sweets.  After decorating the house, minus the Christmas tree, the women all spent the afternoon making cookies and other treats.  Neither Esther nor Mrs. Oh, let Abigaíl put things away.  They just wanted her to sit and rest.

Abigaíl yawned, "I think I'm tired from not helping."

 - "You were busy all week, preparing for Thanksgiving and didn't really get enough rest."

 - "I wasn't that busy."

Jaejoong gave his wife a slow, unhurried kiss.  When she opened her eyes, he was staring at her with such adoration.  "Jaejoong, your Mom gave me a very similar look earlier.  What's going on?"

He chuckled and turned her so he could spoon her against him.  "Yeobo, you've been tired, you got sick out the blue this morning and...Mianhae, I've been so insensitive.  I'm just realizing this..."  His hand cupped her and caressed it as gently as possible; she flinched just a tiny bit though she tried not to.  Removing his hand, be brought it back to rest around her waist.  "Yeobo, when was your last period?"

 - "I...was actually wondering that before I felt sick this morning."  She turned to face him.  "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

 - "Umma thought it first," he laughed.  "I was a bit slow but finally caught up.  All the symptoms are there but you've been through this before, how do you feel?"

 - "I'm pretty sure I am," she smiled at him.  "It kind of just dawned on me and really, I haven't had my period since we've been married."  She averted her eyes, husband, Doctor, or not, it was still a little weird discussing her menstrual cycle with this man.

He smiled back.  "We'll go to the lab Monday before work.  We'll let Yoo and Esther take our jagiya to school.  Yeobo, saranghaeyo.  Wau!  I'll be the Father of a six-year-old and a newborn.  A little daunting when I think about it but I’ll take all the little blessings the Lord wants to give us and I'll cherish each one."

December 4, 2014

After saying goodnight to their co-workers, Jihoo, Ilana, Jaejoong, and Abigaíl all walked out together.  "Don't forget, you two promised to come over Saturday," Abigaíl said.  "Eommoni promised to make something delicious if you come."

 - "Eommoni and Esther always make delicious food, even if we don't come," Jihoo said.

 - "Anae will not be happy if you two don't come," Jaejoong said.  His wife planned on letting them in on their little secret.  Being that this was her second pregnancy, in just a few days, a slight bump had already formed.  Even if she was only ten weeks into her pregnancy.

 - "Gwenchana, we will," Ilana said.

 - "See you tomorrow," Jaejoong said.

Both couples walked their separate ways.  The weather was freezing according to Ilana.  Jihoo walked in the forty degree weather as if it were spring.  He put his arm around her and drew her close.  By the time they reached their apartment building she would be warm enough.

 - "Abigail's been a little weird this week."

 - "Oh," Jaejoong had already told him.  He had been bursting at the seams.  They would be announcing it to her family on Sunday but he couldn't stand the wait and told Jihoo yesterday as soon as he got the lab results.

 - "They're so cute together.  I still can't believe the radical change in Dr. Jaejoong."

 - "Faith works miracles, Sarang."

Ilana smiled at Jihoo, she knew, she could never have that faith he talked about so easily.

 - "When we get home, Na will make dinner, you get comfortable and come over with joy."

 - "Chincha?"

 - "Deh, na want to tell you something?"

 - "Should I be worried?"

 - "Ani, it has to do with the surprise."

 - "Yoon Jihoo, you've been teasing me with this surprise for a month now."

He grinned, "Sooner than you think Na will tell you."  He pecked her on the lips.

Forty-five minutes later Ilana knocked on Jihoo's door, freshly showered, changed, and cat in tow.  "Perfect timing."  Jihoo greeted her with a kiss on the cheek.

 - "Na tried not to take too long, can I help with something?"

 - "Ani, na had everything ready to be prepared.  As soon as you wash your hands, we can eat."

 - "Arraso.  Salmon, yummy."  Ilana quickly washed her hands and Jihoo set the table.  Also, he set aside a small portion of salmon for Joy.

 - "Mokega (let's eat)."

 - "Jalmokegetsumnida (I will eat this well)!"  They began to eat.  "Yummy, Masheesuhyo (it's delicious).  Wae?"

 - "Wae anieyo?"

 - "Sarang is up to something." 

Jihoo wore a self-satisfied smile and continued eating.

When they had finished, Ilana wanted to rinse the dishes as usual and as usual, he didn't let her.  He poured them plum tea and bade her sit on the couch.  "Sarang, tomorrow naega working for only half the Day."

 - "Wae?"

 - "Does Ilana want to come with me?"

 - "Where?"

 - "It's a surprise."

 - "Sarang!"  He was enjoying teasing her.

 - "Sarang is already coming with me, the question is whether she'll do it willingly or I have to kidnap her."

 - "Jihoo-yah, I have to ask Unnie."

 - "Done."

 - "Chincha?  When?  Unnie never said anything to me."  She eyed him warily.

 - "It was a surprise." He took her hand in his and caressed the back of it with his thumb.  "Tomorrow is special, does Ilana know why?"

 - "Ani."

 - "It's our hundredth day."

 - "Already?  Wau!  That went by fast!  Sarang, na didn't have a chance to prepare anything for you."

 - "Gwenchana, na don't want anything...just you by my side."  Ilana opened to protest but he cut her off.  "Arraso?"

 - "Arraso..."  She pouted.  There was no arguing with the man, once his mind was made up.  She'd have to pay him back later.

 - "Choah."  He sat her closer to him and brought his arm around her.  "Na want you to wear your blue taffeta."

 - "Sarang!"  She laughed.  "You tell me when I'm not working and now you tell me what to wear."

 - "Deh, when Na first saw you in that dress, Na remember not being able to move or look away or even talk.  You looked yippeun," he kissed the top of her head.  "Ilana can refuse but she won't get her surprise."

 - "Mmm, in that case, how can I refuse?"  She turned her head to face him and kissed the corner of his lips.

December 5, 2014

 - "Have a wonderful evening, my dears."  SungRyung had happy tears in her eyes as she hugged the couple in front of her in honor of their 100th day.

 - "Gomawo, Unnie."

 - "Noona, gwenchana," Jihoo laughed at the tears.

 - "I'm just happy, I love seeing the Lord bring two people together."  Whatever worry about Jihoo planning things too soon vanished in the excitement.

 - "Have fun, guys." Abigaíl was just coming back from getting sick in the bathroom.  She secretly munched on crackers all day long and plum tea.

 - "Thanks, chica.  It'll be your 100th day soon too."

Jihoo laced his fingers through hers and they walked out.

Jihoo gave Ilana a generous three hours to get ready. Thankfully, the salon next to their building wasn't busy midday and she was able to get her hair trimmed and styled in about an hour.   Heading back to her apartment she still had plenty of time to eat something, do her make up, and get dressed.  By the time Jihoo arrived at her door she was more than ready in the dress he requested, tights and simple black three-inch heels.  He didn't say anything, just, smiled, caressed her cheek, and brought his lips softly to hers.

 - "Kaja," he helped her with her scarf, gloves, and coat.  He was no less handsome in his dark suit and open black wool coat.

Jihoo was unnervingly quiet in the car.  Ilana would take a glance at him in an attempt to figure him out but he betrayed nothing.  When he was sure she wasn't looking, he'd sneak a peek and smile to himself.

At a stop, he felt his pocket, making sure the parcel was still there.  Not that it wouldn't but just for reassurance.

Ilana caught the movement out of the corner of her eye.  "Sarang?  Where are we going?  Aren't we near the Lincoln Center?"

 - "Deh."

 - "Are we catching a show?"

 - "Deh."

 - "Jihoo-yah!"

 - "Mmm?"  He asked with polite interest, knowing that he was torturing her.

Ilana sighed.  "Sarang..."

 - "Ilana-yah...Sarang, do you trust me?"

 - "Deh..." she sulked.

 - "Choah," he gave her hand a squeeze.  Soon after, he turned into a parking garage.

 - "Sarang, this isn't the same garage you used last time?"

 - "Deh."  Parking in a preferred spot, he turned to her intently.  "Sarang said she trusts me."

 - "Wae?  Jihoo-yah, where are we going?"  She suddenly felt nervous, even though she knew there was nothing to fear with him.  He would never hurt her but sometimes he had to in order to make her feel better.  Was this one of those times?  She thought they were done with everything.  She felt her heart beating fast.

Jihoo opened her door and extended his hand to her.  She took it warily.  She could tell he was up to something but hadn’t figured out just what it was.  Jihoo closed the door behind her and took his lovely and near to panicking girlfriend in his arms.  "Does Ilana know, how precious she is to me?"  He kissed her cheek, then wrapped an arm around her waist as they walked.  "Gwenchana," he said, rubbing her arm with his hand.  Her steps were slow as he dragged her along.  He had deliberately taken the long route to confuse her, so she didn't really know where they were exactly.  That is until they walked out of the parking structure only to face Carnegie Hall.

 - "A-a-anieyo, Sarang.  I'm not ready."

 - "Deh, you are."

Ilana was shaking her head frantically and not moving from her spot neither forward nor backward.  A tear rolled down her face and Jihoo took her in his arms.  "Shh," he said as he rubbed her back with one hand and held her tight with other.  "Na told Ilana, we would do this, deh?"

Ilana made a grieving sound in the back of but otherwise shook her head.

 - "Kaja," he stepped back and took her hand.

Ilana felt all the cold again but refused to move.  "Shiro!  Not yet!  Juseyo!"  She begged.  She knew he'd never let her off the hook but had to try.

He took his handkerchief and blotted the tears that were falling.  "If Na can get behind the wheel of a car, nae sarang can walk into that building.  Sarang is nomu yippeun, don't ruin your makeup."  He smiled at her sweetly and kissed her cheek.  Wrapping an arm around her waist, he led her across the street and into Weill Recital Hall.

Ilana didn't even know how they arrived at the Hall.  What door they entered or if they passed anyone along the way.  All she could think of was how fast her heart was beating.  Jihoo knew as well, for occasionally she could hear him whisper 'breathe'.  Or it could've been her imagination.  Anything was possible.  Ilana looked around.  "It's empty," she croaked.  For some reason, she couldn't find her voice.  They stood at the back of the Hall.  It was very beautiful and serene.  Blue curtains and ivory walls made for a very soothing effect but not for Ilana.

 - "Kaja, na rented it for a few hours."

 - "Mworago?!"  She heard her voice echo in the hall and turned to run out.

 - "Sarang," Jihoo caught her and wrapped his arms around her back, engulfing her in his protection.  "Sarang," he spoke softly.  "Nae sarang.  Once I let go, Na won't keep you from walking out.  Hajima, it's just a room.  Just like for me, it was just a car.  Will staying away from this place bring them back?  Does one phone call, eliminate ten years of happiness?"  He let her go, fully expecting her to run and there would go all his plans for the evening, the next month and beyond.  When she remained standing there, breathing heavily with tears in her eyes, he was heartened.  "Sarang, na want to do this with you.  Draw what strength you can from me."  He walked in front of her and took her in his arms.

Ilana felt his arms around her and sagged into him.  There was no way out of this, he was right.  But still, she was tired of fighting her demons.  Why couldn't they just go away on their own, without the struggle and the emotional stress?  She wanted so much to be happy.  Would this come back to haunt her one day if she didn't face it now?  She knew the answer to that.  Didn't it always come back to hurt her over and over again?  "Wae?"  She asked shakily.  "Sarang, you don't have to involve yourself in my problems."  Yes, she didn't want to be here.  Yes, it hurt but it hurt him too.  That's what she couldn't stand.  "You do too much!  You're going to get tired!"

 - "Andwae."  Jihoo drew her chin up to face him.  "Sarang, remember what I told you about friendship?  We...are building our history, our bonding. Na told Ilana she would never let me down and even if you did, Na would forgive you.  Even if you walk out this door right now, saranghaeyo.  We take care of each other, nothing is too big or too little between us.  Ilana doesn't want me hurt, any more than I want you to be hurt.  Ara, a little piece of your heart still hurts over this building and possibly over other things.  In order for me not to hurt, I need to help you eliminate those wounds.  Na don't want to just give you a bandage.  Bandages can come off, Na want to see you healed, without scars."  He paused to kiss her teary eyes.  "Let me be by your side, let me do this for you.  Use me, my experience.  Lean on me, trust me, like you've been doing.  When it's all done, then we can walk side by side forever, as we promised."

Ilana nodded and allowed herself to be drawn further into the hall.  She knew he was right.  It was just a building.  In a way, she finally acknowledged her loss by visiting their grave.  This should be easy, right?  Why didn't it feel that way?

It was one of those rare and coveted days off for KyuJong and HyungJun.  The two agreed to meet for a late breakfast in Seoul.  KyuJong suggested the same restaurant they ate at with Jihoo and Ilana on the last day of her visit, Butterfinger's Pancakes.  KyuJong couldn't help smile to himself thinking of Dr. Jihoo and Ilana.  He was thinking back to his conversation with the Doctor a month ago now.  He wondered if he'd asked her yet.  He couldn't wait to find out.  Although Ilana might not call them for fear of what they might think.  Precisely why she didn't tell him that day on the phone that she and the Doctor were in a relationship.

"Arrayo everything about Ilana-ssi now,” Jihoo had told him.

 - "Jeongmalyo?  Wau!  Ilana-ssi finally gave you her full trust."  He was impressed that he had managed in such a short time.

 - "It didn't come easy."

  - "Mollan Anji (of course not).  How is nae yeodongsaeng, now that Jihoo Uissa knows? Did she try to run away?"

 - "Deh, na wouldn't let her," he smiled.

 - "Choahyo.  Greon, what does this mean?"

 - "Our hundredth day is in the first week of December.  Na would like to know if Na have your blessing?"

 - "Mworago?  Wae?  Ilana-ssi has her Oppa, not that she listens to him that well."

 - "Na met Enrique-ssi, shortly after.  Ilana-ssi regards KyuJong Uissa as Oppa as well.  If it weren't for Uissa, where would she be?"  Jihoo left that question hanging.  She wouldn't be in New York, maybe in Florida or in a worse situation than when she had pneumonia.

 - "Anieyo!  Na didn't do anything special."  He was just being himself and Ilana was a sweet girl and easy to like.

 - "Hokshina (perhaps) hajiman, Heo YoungSaeng-ssi is KyuJong Uissa’s chingu, arrayo about his feelings for Ilana-ssi, all of them."

 - "Gwenchanayo, we only want her happiness.  She never claimed anything more than friendship with Hyeong.  His feelings were all one-sided.  Deh, he loves her hajiman in the end, he'll be happy if she's happy.  Na could see that you two were close and getting closer.  This, Na was anticipating.  Is Uissa, just asking nae blessing to form a relationship with Ilana-ssi or is Uissa planning something of greater importance come your hundredth day."

 - "Either, Na have gotten transparent as I've gotten older or KyuJong Uissa is as good at reading others as Ilana-ssi says you are..."

 - "Yah!  KyuJong Hyun!  You're not listening to me," the baby of the group cried.

 - "Deh, I was.  Na can do two things at once, unlike Maknae."

 - "Na can too!"

 - "Anieya, it's YiHyun-ssi this and YiHyun-ssi that.  YiHyun-ssi sent me this and YiHyun-ssi sent me that.  Talking to you about anything else is pointless, no wonder Hyeong doesn't want to get together with us."

 - "Hyeong-duel are just jealous because YiHyun-ssi sends me cool care packages."

 - "Maknae can keep his stuffed animals, seashells, and pictures of puppies and kittens."  KyuJong just expertly summarized everything his younger friend was saying.  "See, I was paying attention."

 - "Arraso, Hyeong," Maknae was happy that his friend really was listening.  "Hyeong, YiHyun-ssi has been networking and has a good following now, she's hoping to build her client base so that we can open the studio by the time I'm done serving."

 - "Choah, we may need a good wedding photographer soon."

 - "Hyeong?  Who's getting married?"

 - "Someone."

 - "Who?"

 - "Someone we know," if he told Maknae, it would get back to YoungSaeng before they knew if it would happen or not.

 - "Who!?"

KyuJong laughed at his pouting friend.  "You'll find out when it's time."

HyungJun stuck his tongue out at him.

 - "Yah!  Do that again and I'll surgically remove it from your throat."

 - "Mwo?"  HyungJun blinked innocently.

Jihoo made Ilana sit with him at the grand piano.  It was a lovely instrument, he could see Ilana's gaze admiring it.  He didn't know everything, only that she'd been raised in a musical family.  He didn't doubt she had musical abilities, just not the extent of it.  He began to play a simple melody, while he watched her reaction.  She just stared at the instrument before her, eyes following the movement of Jihoo's hands.  He could almost see her fingers curling, wanting to touch the keys.

He stopped playing and she looked up to his face.  "Touch it," he placed one of her hands on the keys.  "Ara Ilana wants to.  Na can see the desire in your eyes.  Your fingers curl wanting to touch.  I've seen them do that before but at the time Na didn't really know why.  Hokshina we could have done this sooner."  He began an extremely simple piece by Mozart.  He saw her smile tentatively.  It was there, he was so close.  Her hands shook as they hovered over the keys.  "Together now," he said.  He began again but still, she didn't play.

She just stared at the keys, torn between wanting to touch them and at the same time finding it pointless.  Shaking her head and balling up her hands, "I only ever played to make my parents happy.  I loved to hear Umma sing and play.  To play with her, for her and Appa, it was special.  They left and Na had no one to play for, they were the reason I wanted to play in the first place."

Jihoo wrapped her in a tight hug, she wasn't crying but shaking slightly.  "Ilana-yah, nae sarang, play for me.  Make me happy, let me be your reason."  He kissed her cheek and turned back to the keys.  "Ilana knows this, it's a beginner’s piece."

Ilana nodded her head.  She did know the music, it was one she had practiced many times at first.  "Sarang, it’s been sixteen years...," still she protested.

 - "Follow me," he took her hands and placed them on the keys again.  He then began to play.

It took Ilana about thirty seconds to jump in and even then she started and stopped.  It was a short piece but Jihoo played it over and over until she got the hang of it again.  He stopped to see if she would also but he smiled widely when she didn't.  Ilana continued for another minute or two before she realized he had stopped.  Her eyes grew wide at the dawning realization and then the tears rushed forward.  Jihoo held her tight against him, shushing her and brushing his lips against her hairline.

 - "Th-that was aw-awful," she said once she could speak.

 - "Mmm," he chuckled.

 - "You're mean."

 - "Na was just agreeing with you."  They sat at the piano, entwined.  She took refuge in his embrace as her emotions went haywire.

When her tears had finally stilled he spoke again.  "Ilana-yah, Sarang, where were you that night or was it day?"

Ilana drew breath to respond but didn't move from his shelter.  "It-It was night and it must have been another hall.  It w-was bigger."

 - "Tell me more."

 - "Na was about to go on stage, Na had done an interview with another vocalist."  Ilana still wore her coat but could feel the goosebumps forming on her arms under it.  "Someone rushed over to me.  I'm guessing it was the person in charge of the show.  I-I don't remember.  They told me about...," she took a deep breath.  "...about the accident and there weren't..." Jihoo held her tighter and her back, knowing what she had to say next.  "...weren't surv-v...survivors.  I thanked them for telling me and went on as planned.  Na don't remember what I sang or how well I did but Na remember announcing that I wouldn't sing again."  Ilana was shaking but remained dry-eyed, just like that evening.

Jihoo tilted her head and kissed her softly.  There was a meaning in that kiss, Ilana didn't quite comprehend until he let her go and took her hand to stand.  Pulling her to the middle of the stage, he left her there without a word.

 - "Sarang?"

Jihoo was back at the piano, playing a song he knew she knew (Music).  "Sarang knows this, Na want to hear you."

 - "Jihoo-yah, a-ani."  In her brain, she could hear Jennifer Elle as Lizzie singing at Pemberley.  He was right, she knew this; her Mother and she practiced it until they both nailed every note.  It had been so long since she tried singing anything she didn't think she could.  She had barely managed happy birthday a year ago. This was a whole octave higher.

Ilana was still trying to figure out if she could sing when Jihoo stopped playing and walked over to her.  He took her hand.  In her imagination, she saw the disappointment in his eyes. "Mianhae," she looked away.

 - "Wae?"  He lifted her face towards him.

 - "You're disappointed."  She paused for a second, but then rushed forward.  "I-I hear them...the notes.  I can feel them in-in my chest, but-but I can't open my mouth.  Mianhae," she said softly and tried pulling away but he didn't let go.

Jihoo smiled widely at her, he didn't know where she got the idea he was disappointed in her.  "I am not disappointed, eeliwah (come here)."  He pulled her back to the piano.  He sat down, leaving her standing on the side.  Although she looked at him with curiosity, she didn't say a word.  This was good, he thought.  Neither was she protesting or leaving.  "If Ilana can't open , then hum."

 - "Hum?"

 - "Deh," he thought it a very logical solution to her dilemma.  "You can hum your entire range or higher, despite where you are vocally."  She looked at him questioningly but Jihoo just smiled.  "Deh, Na picked a difficult piece but Ilana can do it.  Na have faith in you."

 - "I wish I did," she mumbled.

 - "Na heard that," he looked at her seriously for a second but then smiled again.  "Gwenchana, let's start again."  He began to play and cued her in when the vocals should begin.

Jihoo watched Ilana's concentration, she started and stopped but the point was she was trying.  By the time the chorus kicked in she was getting the hang of it.  Though he faced the piano to let her work it out on her own, he saw her out of the corner of her eye.  She was trying to direct herself, as if moving her hand to the tempo, would make her sound come out clearer.  He had been practicing for an entire month.  He knew the piece with his eyes closed, so he could watch her and not worry about his own playing.  When it was over she felt overwhelmed, breathless from not breathing properly and dizzy from all the emotions running through her.  Ilana didn't even know when Jihoo had stood and was blotting her tears again.

 - "Naega proud of nae sarang.  Kansamnida."  He kissed her left cheek, then moved to her right ear, then her lips.  He moved very slowly, he just wanted to her to feel how much he loved her and was grateful that she trusted in him.  He didn't want to stop kissing her, his lips met hers at every angle but he had to stop.  He didn't want her to think he was disrespecting her in any way.  He smoothed her hair behind her ear and kissed her cheek one more time.  "Gwenchana?"

Ilana nodded her head 'yes'.

 - "How do you feel?  He placed his fingers on her neck feeling her rapid pulse.

 - "Mollah?"

 - "It won't be so hard next time."

 - "Next time?!"  Her voice went up a few octaves so that it came out more of a squeak.

 - "Naega still driving, maja (right)?"  Her wide-eyed look of terror, made him laugh.  "Ilana has nae and always will."  He gave her a teasing peck on the lips.  "Anja, we still have time."  It was just a quarter past four and they didn't need to leave until five-thirty or even five forty-five."

He played 'All I Ask of you' from Phantom of the Opera.  It was a perfect reminder of her time in Seoul and their evening at the Banpo bridge fountain.  He watched her relax and smile as he played.

Ilana let the music soothe her, it was the perfect follow up to an emotionally strenuous activity.

 - "Sarang," her eyes were closed and she opened them to the sound of his voice.  "Saranghaeyo."

 - "Nado."  She felt he was trying to tell her something with his eyes.  "Gwenchana?  Jihoo-yah, is my makeup smeared?"  She was about to stand and look for her purse but anticipating her move, he stilled her with a hand on her knee.  "Anja," he quickly moved his hand to her face.  "Yippeun."

Ilana looked away blushing.  There was an emotion in his eyes, she couldn't read.  Not that it frightened her, she just didn't understand it.  It made her feel inadequate like she should know what he was feeling or thinking.

Jihoo stopped his contemplating, he could tell he was making her nervous.  "Sarang...na want to play another song for you.  All Na want you to do is listen carefully.  It's another one Naega confident you know. (Music)"

Ilana listened carefully, as the tune came alive under his fingers.  It was familiar but Ilana couldn't place it.  It was pop, not classic.  The only pop music she knew well was Kim HyunJoong.  That was it!  It finally clicked and she relaxed, enjoying Jihoo's skill at the piano.

Jihoo finished and gave Ilana his full attention.  "Did Ilana recognize the tune?"

 - "Deh."  Jihoo waited.  "Marry me?"  She asked, not completely sure that was the correct title.

Jihoo gave her a knowing smile.  "Deh."

 - "Deh?"  Jihoo counted to three, resisting the urge to burst out laughing as the dawning realization of those two words hit her.  "Wait...Jihoo-yah?!  Are you...?"  Ilana shook her head in confusion.  He couldn't be asking, could he?  Wasn't it too soon?

He couldn't hold back any longer and laughter spilled over.  He found her face, amusingly red as she tried to talk herself out of the possibility that he would be asking 'the' question.  Jihoo took her lips gently with his, knowing he was confusing her even more.   "Happy hundredth day, Sarang.  Na would like something and you'll have a chance to give it to me soon."  He was throwing her off the question just as he'd planned.  Her face was amused and a little puzzled.  There was so much he wanted to tell her, he didn't know if he could get it all out.  "Ilana said she just wanted to love me and know that Na love her too.  Na can tell you with absolute confidence, not a day goes by that nae sarang hasn't increased."  She smiled at him, though her eyes were moist from emotion.  He reached out and traced her lips.  "Nam cham tek byeolhae (You are so special).  Ara, Ilana doesn't believe it but you are the one God picked to complete me and me to you.  Ilana doesn't understand."  She looked like she was about to say something but Jihoo put his finger on her lips to calm her.  "Don't try to understand, just believe."  She nodded, she would try.  For him, she'd do anything.  "Ilana-yah, mianhamnida.  Na told you a small lie."  She looked at him in surprise.  "Na said I wouldn't be having a board meeting this month.  Na also said I wasn't going this month."  He took her hand.  "Na meant, Na didn't want to go alone.  There's a gala and benefit for the conservatory."

 - "The one Gaeul mentioned?"  Ilana wasn't sure what he was getting at but it seemed her heart rate was speeding up without her knowing exactly why.

 - "Deh, na would like to take you with me..." with his free hand, he pulled a little blue box from the inside pocket of his suit jacket.

Ilana's eyes were wide with astonishment.  She wasn't expecting this, not that she would ever expect it but it really was happening.

Jihoo turned Ilana's palm up and laid the box in the center.  "...as nae fiancé.  Deh, the song was the question.”  Jihoo let go of Ilana's hand and stood.  Bowing formally, "Jolang gulhun hejulehyo (Will you Marry me), Ilana Contreras?"

Ilana remained mute, her mind telling her every reason why she should get up and flee from this wonderful, sweet, kind person whom she loved more than anything.

"Nam cham tek byeol hae"

YoungSaeng had told her those exact words.

"Don't try to understand, just believe."

Could she?

"I can't Oppa, I can't!"

"Stop saying you can't and start saying you can!"

Really, could she?

"Do you promise not to let go?"

Could she in good conscience hold him to that promise?  Did she really deserve this as YoungSaeng had told her to tell herself?  She thought she felt tears falling down her face, which would explain her blurred vision.  For a second she thought she was going to faint.  Jihoo must have seen something to make him worry, he sat next to her and took her in his arms.

 - "Sarang can breathe and think at the same time."

That was the problem, she was actually holding her breath.  The time around her had stood still and so had she.  She remained nestled in his arms.  He held her tightly, giving her his strength like always.  Could she live without this?  The answer was unequivocally 'no'.  She wanted this, 'one love, one lifetime'.  Forever...Youngwhanee.  But...she was scared, what if he got tired of holding her up all the time.  What if people found out about her, he was as good as a celebrity in South Korea, right?

Jihoo held Ilana tightly, taking heart that she wasn't running away, she wasn't shaking her head and he didn't think she realized it but she had a tight grip on the ring box.  Tears were falling slowly and she hadn't said a word but she had immediately molded herself to his chest.  It was where she belonged.  He wasn't worried, though, if she took much longer, he'd have to carry her out.  He gave her a reassuring kiss on the head, letting her know to take her time processing it all.  He would keep holding on.

His kiss brought her back to life, in a way.  Not moving from his embrace, she slowly brought her arms around him as well.  "Jihoo-yah, jeongmal?"  She whispered.  If this was an illusion and she whispered perhaps the imaginary Jihoo wouldn't hear her and tell her to wake up.

Jihoo could hear a pin drop if it involved Ilana.  "Jeongmal, Sarang," he whispered in her ear, then moved her hair to kiss his favorite spot behind her ear.

 - "What if you get tired?"

 - "Anieyo."

 - "Jihoo-yah, what if I people find out about me?"

 - ''They won't."

 - "Jihoo-yah...What if you wake up one day and realize you made a huge mistake."

 - "I won't."

 - "Jihoo-yah, I’m scared."

And that was it, he knew without a doubt, she was his.  Fear of failure keeps countless people each year from reaching their potential.  Ilana had the background, intelligence and even personality to accomplish anything she wanted in life.  Had she not let her loss scar her, she would be heading her Father's company and possibly even married to another successful CEO or Chairman’s son.  Somehow, he didn't think she would be happy.  But Ilana's fear wasn't for herself, it was for him.  He knew her.  The fear of hurting him was what made her keep silent after she learned of his own parent's accident.  Fear of hurting him was what made her finally decide to tell him everything in hopes he would turn away from her and save himself the grief. "Ara, Sarang, ara.  Na promised I wouldn't let go, to see you through all your fears.  Ani, it's not too much, saranghae.  Ilana would do the same for me."

 - "That's different," she half-smiled against him.

He took her head and kissed her forehead, then slid his lips slowly all the way to her cheek, then whispered in her ear, making her shiver slightly with either fear or excitement.  She didn't know which.  "Sarang, open the box, deh?"  He unwrapped her arms from around his waist.  She had been holding the box so tightly, her hand was red.  He took the box from her and before she could protest, he opened it.

 - "It's beautiful," the tears began to fall again.  In the famous blue Tiffany's box was a perfect princess cut solitaire.   

 - "Sarang," he tucked her hair behind her ear again.  It had a stubborn habit of falling back to the front of her face.  "Make us happy."

 - "D-deh," she spoke barely above a whisper.  Clearing , she tried again.  "Deh."

Smiling, he took the ring and placed it on her finger.  "Saranghaeyo," he wiped a tear with his thumb.

 - "Nado saranghaeyo," Ilana cupped his cheek for a second.  He too had a stray tear falling.  After rubbing it away, she brought his face closer to hers and kissed him as firmly as she dared.

Jihoo's heart had been pounding.  Perhaps he really did have a miniscule fear she wouldn't accept.  He relished in her kiss and didn't let her shy away so easily.  He took advantage of her daring and kissed her back with equal fervor.  He let her end the kiss only to pull her back towards him and began placing soft kisses over her entire face, making her laugh.

 - "Hajima!"  She was half crying and half laughing.  She threw her arms around her waist and leaned her head on his chest, her favorite position.  She squeezed him as tight as she could.  "Sarang, how can I enjoy hugging you so much, when you're not very huggable," she giggled feeling the hard muscle through his jacket.  She must be delirious and dreaming, she thought.

Jihoo chuckled and gave her a squeeze back.

 - "Yah!"  Ilana protested without making a move.

 - "Mmm, the same can be said of nae sarang."  Her laugh was like the sound of the bow gliding across the violin or the strum of a guitar.  In short, like a sweet melody.  "Sarang, let's go to dinner and try and to resolve our un-huggable status."  He pecked her lips and stood, extending his hand to her.

Bundled back up, they walked over to Barbetta on 46th street.  It was a fifteen-minute walk but Ilana's heels, though tall, were comfortable.  They were nestled cozily in the wine library of the restaurant.  Ilana's head was still trying to catch up with the afternoon's activities and was picking at her chicken.  "Sarang," Jihoo called her attention.  "Na thought you were going to eat?"

 - "Mianhae," she smiled guiltily.  "The chicken is delicious."

 - "What is running through Sarang's head?"

 - "Mollah?  Naega still trying to decide if our conversation happened.  Na keep looking at my hand in my lap."

 - "Sarang," he covered her hand with his.  "Na can't be happier, than at this moment."

 - "Na do, Sarang."

 - "Open, ara nae sarang will eat salmon."  They had agreed to order different dishes in order to share but salmon was both their favorite.

Ilana tried to shy away but Jihoo insisted.  "Sarang!  People will stare."

Jihoo took advantage and snuck the fork into .  "Gwenchana," he said as she was busy chewing.  They continued feeding each other, chicken and salmon until both plates were nearly empty.

 - "I'm stuffed!  Wae did Jihoo let me eat so much."

Smiling, Jihoo took her hand and admired the ring on her finger.  It fit perfectly, just like his Mother's ring.  "Sarang, nae sarang."  The waiter came and took their plates away and Jihoo continued holding both Ilana's hands in his.  He had wanted to leave the details of the gala and the majority of his plan for later.  He knew it was best not to overwhelm her all at once.  "Sarang, na have asked for a leave of absence."  He saw her panicked look.  "Sarang, na won't go without you."  He caressed the back of her hand with his thumb.  "Ilana said ‘Deh’, which did include the Gala, maja?"

Ilana took a deep breath, she understood what he said.  She hadn't thought about it but it meant being introduced to the upper echelon of Korean society as his fiancé.  "Na...want to be where you are.  Na...want to make you happy."  Even if it meant facing the mob, she thought.

 - "Na want to be happy with you.  Ilana has nothing to worry about, nothing to be ashamed about.  Even if we didn't share chaebol status, Na would love you and they would have to accept you."

 - "Arraso, na won't let you down."

Jihoo kissed the hand sporting the new ring.  "Sarang, it's not just about me.  It's the two of us now; to lean on; to lift each other up, to share each day."

It was too cold to walk back so they took a cab.  They snuggled in the back of the cab, even if the ride was less than ten minutes.  Jihoo held Ilana's right hand in his left and his right arm held her close against him.  Her head leaned against his shoulder, made possible by the old-fashioned lap belt.

The day had been a success as far as Jihoo was concerned.  He had accomplished what he'd set out to do, conquer Ilana's last remaining fear and propose to her.  Have an excellent meal in her company and enjoy a piano recital.  It was still a little early as they exited the elevator on their floor.  Most theatre patrons enjoy going to dinner after the show.  He leaned against him as they walked.  She was tired, physically from work earlier in the day and emotionally from the entire afternoon and including the piano performance.  He unlocked her door and they walked in.  She kicked off her heels at the door and Jihoo took her coat.  Joy walked over to greet them.

 - "Deh, goyangi, I'm sitting down right now."  Ilana walked over to the couch while the cat greeted her Ajussi.  He kicked off his own shoes and picked up the cat.  Jihoo sat down next to Ilana and they absently pet the cat.

 - "Goyangi," Jihoo addressed the cat.  "We'll be going on a long vacation.  You'll have to be a good kitten on the flight, arraso?"

 - "Jihoo-yah, I didn't even think about Joy?  What about quarantine?"

 - "Gwenchana, it's all settled."  He ran his hand through her hair, relaxing her.  "She won't be quarantined but we'll need to make sure we take her to the vet.  In fact, tomorrow, we'll go."  Jihoo saw her relax.  "Your gown is taken care of as well."  He knew she'd have a reaction to that.

 - "Jihoo-yah!  How many gowns, do I need?"  She already had the one for WooBin and JaeKyung's wedding, the one for the grand opening, and the one she was wearing.

 - "As many as your fiancé wants you to have."  He kissed the corner of her pouting lips.  "Ah, speaking of your fiancé’s wishes, na will take you shopping after we get Joy's travel documents taken care of."

 - "Na don't like shopping.  I have everything I need."

 - "Either Sarang goes shopping with me or Na send you with Ha JaeKyung."

 - "Some choice."

 - "Na thought you would agree.  Get some rest," he kissed her cheek.  "Na will see you tomorrow."

Ilana stifled a yawn, she was suddenly worn out.  "Sarang?  When is the gala?"  She realized he'd used the Gala to distract her from the fact that he was proposing.

 - "We leave Thursday, jalja."

 - "Thursday?!"

 - "Na will see myself out."  Jihoo smiled as he picked up his shoes and headed out the door before she could get too upset at him.  He still hadn't revealed everything to her.  He did feel a tiny bit of remorse at placing her on a need to know basis but it was the easiest way.  "Kansamnida," he prayed.

Well, I had almost forgotten about our newlyweds and Jihoo hasn't revealed his entire scheme, so next chapter will be the last for Section II. New Beginnings.  Saranghaeyo!

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