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The Girl Who Wants Death

Sunhi’s POV

            The car ride to school was filled with my mom’s talking, her chirpy voice ringing through the vehicle. She kept talking about how I should enjoy my senior year and make new friends. I simply nodded and gave her a small grimace of a smile. She seemed pleased with that.

            Getting out of the car, I already heard a bunch of whistles strewn through the air around me, a billion guys and girls casting their eyes towards me. I was new and fresh meat for them to hunt. But I kept a neutral expression on as I pulled my pale blue, messenger bag over my right shoulder, quickly walking towards the main office.

            The lady sitting at the front desk smiled at me, probably recognizing me from my picture on my file.

            “Welcome! Are you Choi Sunhi?”

            I nodded and she reached under her desk, pulling out a few sheets of paper.

            “Here’s your schedule, map, and a few school guidelines. Homeroom doesn’t start for another half hour, so please explore the campus a bit. If you get lost, just ask any of the students for help. I’m sure they’ll be willing to.” She smiled again before waving at me.

            I waved back, turning around and walking out the door. I quickly glanced at my schedule, then to the map. If there was that much time before homeroom, I could get to my classroom early and nobody would be there.

            By the time I actually found my homeroom, though, there was already someone sitting inside with one of his friends. They both glanced at me, and soon, I could tell they were confused. "Why was there a weird girl we’ve never seen walk into our homeroom?" was what they were probably thinking. Hmm…  I wonder.

            I walked towards the back of the classroom and sat down by the window, resting my chin on the palm of my hand. There was the scraping sound of chairs on the floor before I heard footsteps, then a tap on my right shoulder.

            The two guys were standing behind me, one smiling while the other just looked a bit bored. Maybe a little tired as well.

            “Hey um… this is a senior classroom. The freshman classrooms are down the hall to the right.” The smiling guy pointed towards one direction. He had a slight lisp when he spoke… but it wasn’t really the annoying kind.

            A freshman? You’re kidding, right?

            “I’m a senior,” I muttered, turning away.

            “Oh! I’m really sorry! You’re probably new this year, huh?”

            No , Sherlock.

            I nodded.

            “Some first impression.” He laughed. “Sorry about that. I’m Oh Sehun, and this is —“

            “Kim Jongin. I can introduce myself, Sehun.” There was a pause before he said, “Just call me Kai.”

            I turned to face them, only out of courtesy, before replying, “Choi Sunhi.”

            “That’s a pretty name,” replied Sehun. “Welcome to Seoul High School!”

            I briefly looked over their appearances. Sehun was relatively tall, with quite pale skin and dark hair. He seemed nice enough. Kai on the other hand was, though just as tall, a lot darker in skin tone. He looked unamused.

            The two of them then sat down in desks near me, Sehun on my right and Kai in front of me. I pushed my bracelets down more securely over my wrists.

            “You’re wearing a lot of bracelets. Do you collect them?” Sehun gestured towards the six bracelets I had on, three on each wrist.

            “Ah… yeah.”

            “That’s pretty cool.”

            He reached forward, probably just to flick one of the charms playfully, but I sharply pulled away. One wrong move and my scars are open for the wonderful world to see.

            Sehun’s hand moved away quickly. “Sorry.”

            I shook my head. But I couldn’t really will myself to smile. That’s good-bye to one possible friendship or two. How did I used to be so good at this friend-making thing?

            The rest of the time before class was spent trying to create small conversations, with Sehun doing most of the talking, Kai pitching in once or twice, and me just nodding or shaking my head. I can imagine that after homeroom, they’ll pretend they don’t even know me… especially Kai.

 

Kai’s POV

            “Kai! What are you doing here so early?”

            I looked over my shoulder to see Sehun running towards me, his backpack barely staying on his right shoulder.

            “Went to check out the new dance studio. It looks pretty much the same as before, just a bit newer.”

            “Better than nothing, right?”

            I shrugged. “I’m just gonna go to our homeroom class.”

            “But we’ve still got 45 minutes.” Sehun stared blankly at me.

            “You don’t have to follow.” I left, walking towards the classroom. But a few seconds later, Sehun was already following behind, hands shoved in his pockets.

            I slumped into a seat, resting my forehead on my arms.

            “You’re just gonna sleep?”

            I muttered something that I didn’t even understand and was pretty much sleeping until I heard the door open. I glanced at the clock and realized it’d already been fifteen minutes.

            Sehun tapped me on the shoulder and pointed to the person who walked in. She was pretty small, and she looked like she was only fourteen or fifteen. If I had one word to describe her though, I’d probably use “pretty”. Too innocent to be hot and too young to be exactly beautiful. Just… really pretty, I guess.

            She had long, dark hair, and big eyes. Her clothes suited her really well, pastel colors and all. But that frown on her face cast a dark shadow around her. A dark veil clouding her pretty features.

            Sehun walked over, tugging my sleeve to make me follow. He tapped her on the shoulder and she glanced towards us. Her eyes seemed dark, deep, but like there was a tarp covering up all of her emotions.

            “Hey um… this is a senior classroom. The freshman classrooms are down the hall to the right.”

            “I’m a senior.” She turned away.

            Ouch. So she’s not as young as she seems. Off by two or three years…

            “Oh! I’m really sorry! You’re probably new this year, huh?”

            You’re screwing yourself over, Sehun…

            She only nodded.

            “Some first impression.” He laughed. “Sorry about that. I’m Oh Sehun, and this is —“

            “Kim Jongin. I can introduce myself, Sehun.” I paused, looking at the small girl. She seemed pretty disinterested. “Just call me Kai.” Nobody really calls me Jongin anymore… I barely remember it’s my real name anyways.

            She looked over at us again and said, “Choi Sunhi.”

            Sunhi? She doesn’t seem all bright and sunny to me.

            “That’s a pretty name. Welcome to Seoul High School!”

            At least he got one thing right. Sehun, I’m gonna have to teach you a few things about talking to girls…

            “You’re wearing a lot of bracelets. Do you collect them?”

            “Ah… yeah.”

            Her voice is soft. At least she’s not a loud person. Fits her image.

            “That’s pretty cool.” Sehun smiled and reached to probably just mess with one of the charms. But she flinched away. Weird. “Sorry.” He squeezed in a sheepish smile before she just nodded.

            Great job, Sehun.

            She seems a little cold to me. I thought having a new student would be interesting. She seems a bit awkward to say the least. Maybe also hiding a secret… It’s easy to see it in her uneasiness.

            Sehun tried to fire up the conversation again, but he failed pretty miserably. I tried to help out with making a comment here or there, but the girl’s got a pretty frozen expression, only nodding or shaking her head a few times.

            Students filed in, a ton of them waving at Sehun and me. Some girls even ran over to ask some “How was your summer vacation?” or “Can we have lunch together today?” questions. Sunhi just stared out the window the entire time. Kinda makes me curious about her now. Just because she doesn’t act as a normal high school senior should. But I don’t think we’ll be talking again any time soon.


Did you guys like the chapter :)? I hope so~

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Thanks so much for reading and I'll try to update soon~

Please comment if you see any mistakes o_o I tend to make quite a few.

See you in the next update~

~DespisedSecret

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almassbrn
#1
Chapter 22: I JUST CANT
Liajiya
#2
Chapter 16: i think i'm the one who's depressed right now. i seriously don't understand why sunhi can't just make everything alright again. it's not like kai did it on purpose or had any bad intention. if anything she's the one who wanted to remain anonymous to each other.
MY JONGIN FEELS. i can't contain it T_T
and the last scene </3
thank you for shaeing the beautiful story. now i'm off to the sequel :D
cessyness
#3
Chapter 18: Awww... poor Kai. :(
cessyness
#4
Chapter 14: They kissed under the mistletoe! XD
Aww. I pity Sehun! Kyaaaaaaaa~
cessyness
#5
Chapter 13: Aww.. Im shipping her with Kai! But I want Sehun too. What to do!!!! >.<
cessyness
#6
Chapter 12: How I wish it was that easy to know how you feel about someone. A friend knocks you out of it and tell you , you like someone or love them even. Whenever I read stories like this, I wish I had a friend who can explain what I feel, just like any other stories, right? Seems so easy...but in reality it is not. Its harder than we thought.

What the fudge is wrong with me?! >.<
cessyness
#7
Chapter 8: Awww.. crying my all pent up pain too. T.T Can I have someone like Kai? Kai would be better. XD The part where Kai told her whenever she feels like cutting herself, call him instead, It reminds me of some japanese drama. It's a bout a teacher who observes all his students though they thought he never cares. He all knows what is happening to them. And on the day he'll admit himself to the hospital he gave every student a letter. Though some of them found it weird and didn't care but eventually it dawned to them. That they're teacher was right. And one that student is just like Sunhi. And he told her in the letter that whenever she feels like cutting herself she can call him. And she did..that helped her. That drama is amazing and true. Every chapter tells and shows the reality of whats happening. I bet everyone can relate to that drama.
I just wanted to share because it reminded me of that. And it's amazing how it affected me. One thing is for sure..you are a good writer authornim. :") You moved your readers. Make them feel how the characters are feeling.
cessyness
#8
Chapter 7: Oh my!! What happen!
cessyness
#9
Chapter 6: Aww.. Sehun likes her! And I want to have friends like fx! :">
cessyness
#10
Chapter 5: Gosh...bullies.. uggh.