Kim Hyuna is a chameleon.

She’s a chameleon because whatever it is that Yong Junhyung wants, she transforms herself to meet his needs. Whether it's a friend, a dance teacher, a crying shoulder, or just a simple companion to get through a tough day, she never fails to deliver. And although she knows that her ability can only be of that much use to him, she doesn’t give up because she believes that doing something is always better than doing nothing at all.

At least I’m always here, I hadn’t left.

So it doesn’t matter.

Hyuna feels like a disposable napkin, because she’s always being thrown away after use. Whenever she receives his phone call, all she hears is his gloomy voice, all she sees are his frowns and all she hears are his sighs. She longed to hear his happy shrieks, his screams of joy and his happy cheerful voice but they don’t happen. Because she’s always involved in his unhappiness, certainly, but never a part of the good things. She would lightly tap his shoulders, say how deserving the boys are to win first in music shows, only to receive a vague thanks before she sees him turning away, hugging and celebrating with his fellow bandmates. So she’s confused. Hyuna’s confused because she doesn’t know if she should feel happy that he looks for her because she can finally spend time with him, or sad knowing it was because something bad had happened again.

At least when he’s sad, he thinks of me.

So it doesn’t matter.

Hyuna is a stubborn girl. She would get knocks on her head by her bandmates, asking her to stop being so foolish and find a better boy whose worthy of her. She would get sick of the naggings from the b2st boys about how she shouldn’t always give in to Junhyung, because that wouldn’t make him realize just how important she is. But she doesn’t dare to stop, because she’s afraid that instead, he’ll realize just how insignificant she is.

But an unhealthy relationship is better than no relationship at all.

So it doesn’t matter.

Hyuna knows it ever since the start. She knows that even though she had left, somewhere deep down in Yong Junhyung’s heart there’ll always be a spot for Nicole. She’s more than aware that she’ll never be able to replace herself in that spot, no matter what she does but she doesn’t stop. Hyuna doesn’t stop because she believes that she’ll eventually find another spot in there where she can fit herself into perfectly.

If I can’t be the first, I’ll be the second.

So it doesn’t matter.

--

She lightly kicks the snow as she settles herself down on her bench and pulls her scarf to cover the bottom half of her face, just beneath her sunglasses. Hyuna chants her usual words and waits and waits for the negative thoughts to go, because they always do, they always disappear like the wind because she always has enough faith.

Yong Junhyung is worth it.

Only this time they don’t go, instead, they became worse.

Because this time she’s no longer sure if Yong Junhyung is really worth it anymore.

Because this time she finally realizes that she can’t be second. Because Nicole is first, Nicole is second, Nicole is third and Nicole is forth.

Nicole doesn’t only have a spot in his heart, she has his whole damn heart.

And Hyuna is just being a fool.

“Hmm.” His husky voice rings through her ears, and Hyuna starts to hate herself even more.

She hates herself even more because although she already knew how stupid she is, and how stupid he is, her heart still skips a beat when he’s near.

“Yong Junhyung.” Her voice calm and emotionless though in her heart, a tornado strong enough to destroy half the world is happening right at that instant his name left . “Do you still believe it’s me who did it?”

She felt her heart drop at his silent reply. “That means a yes.”

“No.” He grabbed her wrists before she could walk away. “That means a you’re-my-friend-and-I-cherish-you.”

She lets him pull her back onto the bench but doesn’t dare to look into his eyes because she can’t, she can’t let herself fall back into his trap.

“I don’t know Junhyung, I really don’t.” Hyuna’s eyes starts to sting.

“I’m sorry.”

“She left you, and yet, you still choose to believe her over me.”

Hyuna glances towards her side and sees his fists being clenched so tight they’re turning pale white. She knew this is the last thing he ever wants to be reminded about, the button no one would dare to press because it would trigger something really bad within him. But Hyuna went ahead and press it anyway.

“I don’t like her Junhyung. I don’t like what she did to you, and what she’s still doing to you.”

“You don’t know anything.” He speaks through clenched teeth and Hyuna knows he’s a step away before falling off the cliff.

“Then tell me so I'll know, you stupid idiot.”

He merely shook his head.

“You’re the one who told me you wanted to forget her, that you needed my help. But Junhyung, I’m not god, I can’t save a person who doesn’t want to be saved.”

“I was the one who hurt her.”

Okay.

Okay, wait.

, this was really unexpected.

“I was the one who left her, the one who made her lose her memory.” And from the tone of his voice, Hyuna could tell he was crying underneath those sunglasses.

And this is serious, oh how very serious. Because Junhyung never cry.

“All this time, she’s the only one in my mind.”

Hyuna realizes that she’s really, really a stupid fool because smart girls don’t dig a hole and bury themselves.

“Tell me what to do, Hyuna-ah. Help me.”

She raises his chin towards her, thumbs wiping the tears that had slipped, giving a warm smile before leaning down and pressing her lips on his.

“Start by looking at me.”

Start by realizing my presence.

Start by liking me, Junhyung-ah.

A/N: Junhyung is leaving twitter and I'm sad :'(

@aremoyoona Aigoo don't please me :(

@dnakaram She will be fine, I don't bear to hurt her :<

@Hequella Gosh tell me about it! Hahahah I love the food here.

@Blahh_Missy Because she likes Junhyung and because no one can resist him.. hehehe.

@b2utyful08 Don't be sadddddd :>

@SeaTurtle Who knows? Maybe I'll go crazy and make Junhyung be with Hyuna.. It sounds good actually, hehehe.

@parkminyoong If I'm Doojoon, I'll really hate her.

@amburritosRtacos I'm sorry! :((((((

@shine_star Let's hope together, hehehe :)

@nadiafantastic Finally someone realizes it! Yoseob ah <3

@shineekey She's so in trouble now hahaha, thank you!! <3

@joannemarie93 Thank youuuu! <3

Have a nice day! Xoxo