Carrying baggage was what she thought of as she boarded the aircraft heading to Europe. Europe was a faraway place, her favorite place for a short gateway when the world became too much for her. But it was back then. This time, Europe would be home.

She dragged her luggage with her. It’s pastel pink.

And oh, once again, she thought: carrying baggage.

How similar.

***

5 years later

He kissed her as the sun rose in the morning and the sky changed into a brighter blue. They were still tangled up in sheets. His kiss was just an innocent peck to the lips, chaste, just enough to wake her up. She stretched and smiled into the kiss, then at him, and whispered a sweet good morning.

He didn’t deserve her and never would, but she deserved better than constantly running after a broken man and breaking her own heart. It was that day, when she showed up outside his prison cell on the day of his release that he decided he would try again and redeemed himself for this woman. Jongin knew that he would settle for this woman, for Bae Suzy.

“Tell me what you want.” he whispered and kissed her forehead. His hands landed on her rounded stomach. She was more than halfway through and he could feel the baby kicked softly.

“Let’s run away,” she whispered back as the baby kicked once more. It’s uncomfortable, but she loved the way it felt and the way he looked. “Let’s run away, just the three of us… for a while.”

“Where?”

“Anywhere with you.”

***

This is redemption. His son was a bundle of joy: young, handsome, cheerful, and lovely. This must be the redemption that he had been seeking. Now, he looked forward to the lights the day and searched for ways to become a better person – a better Dad. And somewhere along the way, he fell in love with Suzy. A different kind of love – a love that was quiet but strong, a love that drove him on yet anchored him home. It was only sometimes that he thought of another woman who disappeared, who once-upon-a-time was the love of his life.

“I miss home a little,” Suzy said, one evening, when they were watching their son ran across the fields. The birds flew away and scattered up in the sky. She rested her head against his shoulder.

“I know a famous place that will make you feel better,” he smiled and kissed her cheek. Kim Jongin smiled a lot lately.

It was in that small restaurant, the kind of ambience that reminded him of home that he saw her again after a long time. Even then, with all the simplicity in her, she still managed to catch his breath away and he couldn’t find it in him to take his eyes off her. He wondered if it was love, yearning, or curiosity. Next to him, Suzy linked their hands together and squeezed.

“As amazing as ever, isn’t she?” Suzy said.

He could only nod.

***

Xi Luhan no longer surrendered his heart to Lee Ji Eun. He stopped searching for his love three months after recovery. She disappeared without a trace and everyone kept their mouth perfectly shut. She did not want to be found. He was heartbroken: why was it so easy for her to leave? As if the days they spent together had meant so little. But then, she had always been fleeting. So he promised himself to forget.

Then why was he boarding the earliest flight to Italy over a simple anonymous post card that only had a picture of her singing with a guitar and an address written on the back of it. Without thinking much, he already booked a plane ticket to Italy. Now that he thought about it, it could have been faked.

But Luhan couldn’t decide which would hurt more: that it could have been faked or the fact that it is not. Finding the café was not hard at all, even with his limited language skill. It was not a place famous for the food, but rather the ambience and the very skilled singer working there.

He sat at the corner and watched her sang with her acoustic guitar.

Oh, the post card was not lying.

Even after the years and after the heartbreak, she still entranced him.

She was… as wonderful as ever.

***

He followed her outside the café after her shift ended. Did she even remember him?

“Hello,” he offered, in a weird accent Italian.

“Hello,” she replied back in Korean with a laugh and he was so relieved.

“Your performance… just now… it’s… it’s amazing…” he stuttered.

“Ah, thank you. I get that a lot.” She smiled and it was brighter than he remembered.

“Do you… do you ever dream of becoming a singer…?” it’s a stupid question that they both knew the answer to. They were doing a play-pretend.

She laughed and it was so beautiful and sincere. A kind of laugh he never expects would slip out of her. “I do. I’m living it right now, aren’t I?”

Ah, play-pretend.

“No, I mean –“

Her cellphone rang.

“Oh, I’ve got to go. It’s nice talking to you. See you around!” she cut him off abruptly.

He watched her walked away. She bounced with every step, almost floating and tripping clumsily. This Lee Ji Eun, a whirlwind of sunshine and positivity, so happy and sweet and so –so beautiful. But he did wonder if this was all a façade.

“Hey! Are you happy?” he yelled out, “with your job, your life… everything?”

She turned around and her yellow dress twirled around her. She looked back at him and screamed a breathless, “of course!”

It wasn’t a façade.

***

Of course, she remembered.

She remembered the both of them. How could she forget? They were both the love of her life. But in those days where she disappeared, destroying and rebuilding homes, she had learnt to let love stay as long as it needs, and to let it go once it needs to leave. Jongin had a son and he was smitten with Suzy. Luhan… he’s still wandering.

Loving someone came with baggage: theirs and hers, and she realized that in this life, she wouldn’t be able to carry them both. Her hands were too full with her own baggage. Love… oh, love… as sweet as it is, is never enough.

In this life, she settled with loving herself.

In the next, she wished for a heart; a heart capable of loving other and herself.

For now, she’s happy.

Author Note

Hello, readers! The epilogue is up, and I'll have to say this ends rather abruptly. It's not exactly the way I had planned it. Neverthless, tadaa, I finished the story! This chapter also marked my leave from AFF. I'll leave my story here. I'd like to say thank you to all the readers that have sticked with me through all my stories. It's been so much fun. Thank you so much and I do hope you enjoy this last piece from me! Goodbye!