Woohyun POV

Nobody said anything to me – but then again, they didn’t need to. I saw all their thoughts from the looks they gave me. Even from those I didn't know. They were chilling, disappointed and confused.

My team members tried not to act any different around me, but I could tell they were all struggling to understand my decision.

Of course I couldn’t tell them the real reason I broke up with Minji. She was a psycho stalker, but I didn’t feel the need to explain my actions to the rest of the sports college. A private matter would stay that way.

When someone had the courage to ask me why Minji and I had parted ways, I just gave them a generic answer. Ee grew apart. There was no one else, and there no other reason. Only Minji and I knew that this was not true.

I could not have a psycho stalker in my life. I didn’t need the added possibility and paranoia that she might track my phone or hack my Facebook or install a camera in my house. It was placing everyone in my life in danger, and I would much rather feel the wrath of my team mates than have anyone I care about getting hurt. When I thought this, it was funny that the first name that popped into my head was Hana.

I would definitely handle this situation better. The break up better. Last time I tried to break up with my girlfriend, in senior year, Chaeyeon, she unleashed the threat of destroying Hana’s social status. But that was high school. Now, we were in university. High school and university are very, very different. The atmosphere is different. People are more focused, and care less about your past or what people are saying about you. Social status didn't really matter any more, at least not to Hana and her university. Status mattered here, in my sports college. I guess that's why everyone was taking the break up seriously. 

To be honest, everyone needed to loosen up a little. Either they were bored, and had nothing else to discuss except my love life, or they took the whole 'unspoken rule of captain and head cheerleader dating' thing way too seriously. I mean, sure, all the captains before me had dated and ended up marrying the head cheerleader of their time, but that did not mean I, personally, had to. 

I felt that everyone else was taking the breakup more seriously than I was. And I was the one who was personally involved, and initiated the separation in the first place. 

I warned Minji to stay the heck out of my life. If she didn’t, I would not hesitate to tell every single university student in the country about her past. That would guarantee her jobless, boyfriend-less and status-less. I made sure I made this crystal clear; leave me, my family and my friends alone and I would do the same.

I guess it was a good thing that the ‘rule’ of head cheerleader and football captain dating was an unspoken one. No one could speak about it. Sure, they could ask me why we broke up, but only on personal terms. Not anything about the team and the so-called history. They couldn’t kick me out of the team or take captaincy away from me. I was too good a player for that.

Coach Choi was shocked, I could tell. As far as I knew, he was in my situation, too. He was now married to the head cheerleader of his time. She was a lovely lady that often baked us cookies and cakes when we won matches. We were always forbidden to eat them, though. Coach Choi had us on strict protein diets on weekdays.

I felt his stern eye on me during practice that day.

I wasn’t one to buckle under pressure, but I guess that day I had a lot on my mind. Well, more than usual. My mind was everywhere else except for the guys standing around me and the ball being thrown about me. I kept missing passes and pausing mid throw to think of what I was actually doing and where I was before I threw it. I was at the stadium, but my mind was miles away.

What was distracting me? I had tried very hard not to think it, very hard not to say it. Hana. Now that Minji was out of my life, what would happen to us? If 'us' even existed. If she ever gave me the time of day, ever again. If she even glanced my way again. 

He pulled me aside one day after practice. I was expecting it, but as soon as I saw the look on his face – uncomfortable – I knew. It was not for my performance, but something else.

Coach Choi was a good man. He understood our priorities and the toughness of training because he had once experienced. But I often felt that his priorities were misplaced.

“Woohyun-ah, what is this I hear about you and Kim Minji breaking up?” He asked, pulling me into his office.

“Sir,” I replied as politely as I could. “I would like to keep my personal life private.”

He would not have any of it. “I need to know, Woohyun. Will this affect your performance as captain of the team?” He hesitated, obviously walking the line between coaching and being too personal. “Can I know why?”

I would have thought my first answer to him was clear enough, but obviously not. “Coach, I do not mean to be disrespectful, but this is a private matter between Minji and I. We were not… suited for each other. We had different morals and different ideas in life.”

He sighed. “Are you sure you can’t work something out? As you know...” Coach launched into his life story, one I heard often when we were too tired to continue our drills like kicking and passing the ball.

“I was similar to yourself, Woohyun. That’s why I feel like I need to look out for you.

I was the captain of my high school team. At the match where college scouts were, I injured myself too. I thought my dreams were ruined because the doctors said I would take at least six months to heal. But I defied all odds and healed in less than three, because of my muscle structure from all the training I did for football.

I entered this sports college, like you, on my own merit, with no scholarship. I met the most beautiful girl on the first day, which is now my wife, Jungah. We complimented each other well; attending all the college events like football press conferences, matches and parties together. It was natural, because of our professions and degrees.”

He paused and looked me in the eye. “Are you sure you are making the correct decision, Woohyun? I do not, I repeat, do not want the backlash of this relationship to affect the performance of you and the rest of the team.”

I felt a rush of gratitude for the man in front of me that clearly did not have his priorities right. “Sir, I feel that if I stay with her any longer, she will detriment my performance. She is like a pest. I have sorted out things with her; we will remain a professional relationship only. Nothing personal.”

The coach breathed a sigh of relief. “That is what I wanted to hear, son. If you aren’t happy with her – well, I guess there is something wrong with this year’s cheerleader breed.” He paused again. Obviously, he was a curious man. “What about – your girlfriend from high school?”

There must have been a shocked expression on my face, because his eyes widened. “Forgive me if I have crossed the line, Woohyun. My intentions are only the best.”

“N-no, sir. I, uh, don’t really know. I felt the pressure to break up with her. But I didn’t want to. But – I’ve hurt her too much to even consider her forgiveness, I know that. But I really miss her… I don’t know what to do. I think about her even more than I blink, but I can’t act on it.”

It was strangely therapeutic, unleashing my problems on the coach of my football team. It was good verbalising my thoughts to someone who had absolutely no chance of telling someone else who would then throw it back in my face.

Coach Choi got up. He had had enough of my teenage problems. He patted me on the back.

“You’re a smart guy, Woohyun. My first captain who is majoring in engineering alongside football and sports science. You’ll figure it out. Can I suggest something? There is a quote that I have never forgotten. "If you love something, set it free; if it comes backs it's yours, if it doesn't, it never was,” by Richard Bach

 I hope you’ll think about it, Woohyun. I noticed how down you were in practice today. The team is looking to you for support and inspiration. I cannot let something, anything affect the performance of my best player.

Do you understand me?”

I nodded. “I understand, coach. I’ll be going now, if there is nothing else.”

He nodded also. “Good. Think about what I said, son.”

If you love something, set it free. Set it free. Love something, set it free, let it go.

These words were running through my mind as I descended the stairs to the locker room. Should I let Hana go? If it was meant to be, it will come back to you. Meant to be – come back to you.

I didn’t want to let her go. There was the risk she would never come back. But with the situation as it is now, would she ever come back? I laughed humourlessly to myself. Would she come back to me, after all I did to her?

No.