I stood at the door next to my mom, greeting guests with a polite smile and a bow. I fidgeted nervously with my tie and I checked the time on my phone. I glanced constantly out of he window to see if I could spot Hana's car. I wiped the sweat forming underneath my fringe.

"Woohyun," my mom nudged me with her elbow. "Calm down son, it's alright. Don't be nervous because of the guests."

I nodded, not bothering to correct her. Why would I be nervous just because some important engineers were coming over to my house for dinner? I was more nervous if Hana stood me up and didn't show. Would Hana do that to me? I knew I didn't deserve to expect anything because I had broken all of my promises to her.

I exhaled harder. Why would she come? My mother inviting her personally and I dropping off an invitation to her house was no incentive for her to come. She had no real reason to, I concluded to myself. Only I knew how important this was to my mom. She wouldn't look good if her son didn't have a date for her dinner party.

I seriously needed to stop having this insane, inflated level of self worth and importance. Given, if I were in her shoes, I wouldn't come to my mother's dinner party myself. So, why did I expect her to do the same? I couldn't. It wasn't really fair of me.

Getting ready to tell my mom the truth about Hana and I, I was saved by a car pulling up in our driveway. I immediately plastered a wide smile on my face, ready to greet another of my mom's colleagues. The windows were tinted, so I couldn't see the person inside, but they were taking an awfully long time to come out.

"Who is - " my mom began, but the rest of her comment didn't register in my brain.

As the car door opened, my heart thumped noisily in my chest. I felt my breath catch in my throat.

Hana stepped out, a bit clumsily, and accidentally trod on her dress. Her mom quickly got out of the driver's seat and helped her free her dress that had caught in the car door. As I stared at her, I saw her cheeks flush pink. Hana was wearing a dress with white, thick singlet straps and a lace detail and a kind of black tutu skirt. Her hair was nicely done in that way that girls liked but I didn't know how to describe. Kind of not tied up, but not let down nor tied up half way. It looked beautiful. All I could think of was how beautiful she looked. No words came to my mouth as she approached the door, as much as my mom nudged me, and all I could do was force a smile and try to calm my palpitating heart. My mother thanked her for coming and introduced her to one of her colleagues, and they began talking.

I was grateful toward her because this meant that I could have a few moments to collect myself before we began our first course. I tried to think of an excuse for the way my heart behaved when I first saw it. Nerves, right? I was nervous because I was the first time we were together since we - no, I - ended our relationship. It was not because I still had some feelings there. No way.

The whole night I tried not to notice everything about her. Where she was in the room, what she was doing, who she was talking to. Every now and then I stole a glance at her to find that she was also staring back at me. I jumped and quickly looked away, my heart pounding once again, like I was a little kid who stole glances at their crush. I kept telling myself, this is just instincts because we were together for so long. I just didn't want her to be in danger, or something like that. A man's nature? That must be the reason why I keep looking over there, right?.

At the dinner table, my mom had unfortunately seated us across from each other, although I expected no less. She had somehow managed to extend our dinner table into a longer one that stretched across into our living room. Looking at the table, Hana and I were the only ones there under fifty. My brother had cleverly gotten out of this by scheduling a physio appointmet at the same time. I really wanted to curse him!

Many elderly men and women chattered loudly around us, but between us, it was deathly silent. I searched my brain again and again for something I could say to her as we waited for our main course, but nothing came out. I had a million things to ask her - had she heard 2NE1's new song, what did she think of her univerisity, has she read J.K. Rowling's new book - but none of it seemed right for the occasion. I mean, what did you say to your ex-girlfriend who was forced by your mom to attend her dinner party that was, frankly, more boring than statistics? I could sense that Hana was finding this silence between us uncomfortable. She kept fidgeting and rearranging her placemat and moving the napkin on her lap. She looked at anywhere, anyone but me, as if she were thinking hard.

I was momentarily distracted by our main course. Eager for the distraction, I dived into the saucy pasta and TE a big mouthful, chewing quickly and swallowing. Across the table from me, I felt eyes staring at my lack of table manners, but somehow I didn't care. Sure, I needed to put a good image on for my mom, but eating like a pig to block out an awkward silence is something I would take anyday.

The woman sitting next to Hana, both of them opposite me, leaned over and whispered something in her ear. They both giggled. I put down my fork, mildly interested, and watched Hana's lips twitch at the sides as she looked at me. I frowned in confusion, but she didn't say anything to clarify. What did that lady say? Whatever she said had, somehow, caused the awkward atmosphere between us to dissipate.

"Woohyun," Hana said, albeit a bit awkwardly and tenderly. "You have some, er, sauce on your chin." She leaned over the table and, using her napkin, wiped the sauce that I now felt on my chin. Much to my dismay, I saw the sauce stained on her napkin was quite a lot. So I had been wolfing down my pasta and splattering it all over my mouth. No wonder I was earning a few weird stares.

"Thanks," I muttered, extremely embarrassed. Now everyone was looking at us due to Hana getting up that attracted so much attention. "Sorry," I mouthed.

She just chuckled and shook her head, going back to eat her meal. As did everyone, after letting out some wolf whistles and awwwws and coos. I mean, really! I thought these guests were supposed to be mature aged, professional engineers - but apparently not.

The rest of dinner went by quickly. Luckily I was engaged in a lovely conversation about quantum physics by the gentleman sitting next to me. He seemed so enthusiastic and passionate about it that I didn't quite have the heart to tell him I didn't learn quantum physics at university until my third year. Hence I had no idea what he was talking about. All I did was nod and comment appreciatively, and hope that he didn't ask me a question. I saw that Hana was also talking about something she didn't understand, as she kept drinking water to prelong her answering time to the same lady that had told her to wipe my chin. I should really thank that lady.

"Now, if everyone would care to join me for coffee in the living room, we can begin our discussions on the new cyclotron project!" My mother stood at the other end of the table from her seat with a flourish. "The two young ones can go for a walk in the garden. I'm sure they will enjoy that more than our boring physics talk!" Everyone at the table wooed and ahhhed and wolf whistled again. I wanted to die of embarrassment, and so did Hana. Her cheeks had turned red and she was smiling very awkwardly.

I saw twelve pairs of expectant eyes looking at me. I sighed and got up, around the table, and helped Hana out of her seat. Then, I took her arm and laced it through mine, and we walked out into the garden. I heard the guests clapping, clapping as we exited the house.

"Sorry about that," I mumbled. "They're a bit old fashioned like that."

"It's okay," she said again, smiling beautifully. "I don't mind."

We walked for a bit in comfortable silence. I had so much to say to her, but I didn't know where to begin.

"Hana, I -" I began slowly.

She stopped walking and looked at me. Her eyes seemed to say, don't say anything that will ruin this moment, or ruin tonight. I sighed. Then I noticed she was covering herself slightly by folding her arms. It was a chilly night, I suppose, but I didn't notice in my suit jacket.

"Here," I said, shrugging off my jacket and draping it over her arms. "Is that better?"

"Woohyun, I don't think - " She began. "I know things are different now. But you're cold, so just take it, okay?" I desperately wanted her to accept my jacket, but I couldn't place why. Maybe because I saw it as a parallel to my heart. She nodded and wrapped it tighter around her. And as we walked, we made small talk about school, the weather, the weirdness of my mom's colleagues. It wasn't as fun as our usual conversations, but I realised, for now, it was alright. Just for now.