I cling unto Lay’s arm as soon as we got inside the hotel. He was a bit surprise because of my sudden action but when he felt me shaking a lot, he just told me that everything’s going to be fine because he’s not going to leave me. It was so sweet of him.   When we were about to get closer and closer to the venue, my shaking got really serious. I was sweating and my hands felt very cold.    “Why are you so tensed? It’s just a birthday party.” Lay said. “Well for me it’s not. I haven’t seen Kris in months and I don’t think I can face him. I mean look at me, I look horrible!” I said nervously. “You don’t look horrible. You look beautiful. Now relax and breathe slowly.” I did what he told me and it wasn’t working! I feel horrible. “Lay, it’s not working.” I said more nervous than ever. He sighed. “Okay. Will this work?” He asked and suddenly hugged me. It was so tight but I don’t think it’s making me feel better. “Mmm…no. I don’t think so Lay.” I said. He stopped hugging me and looked at me. “Should I kiss you?” “Damn Lay! Don’t joke around. This is a very serious matter!” I shouted. “Sorry! I just wanted to make you laugh.” “Well, you’re just making me even more nervous. Maybe we should just go home.” I suggested. “What?! No! Your bestfriend is going to kill me!” Oh . Of course my bestfriend. I did this for my bestfriend! How can I be stupid?! Ugh. Relax Sun Hee. It’s just Kris.    Kris, the guy you tried to love once. Kris, the guy you lost your ity from. Kris, the guy you made out with a lot of times before. Kris, the crazy guy who ruined your life. Well, almost. Ugh! Kris. I hate the name Kris!   “Hey, Sun Hee? Are you still listening to me?” Lay said. Oh . What did he say? “What?” “I said your bestfriend is going to kill me if we don’t get inside now. Let’s just go. Come on. You can cling unto my arm as long as you can, just make sure my blood still flows.” I want to laugh Lay but I can’t. I’m too preoccupied by the thought of Kris. “Alright. Can you do me a favor?” “Sure. What is it?” “Make sure Kris doesn’t see me.”  “I can’t promise that.” “Please.” “Oh alright.”   I continued to cling on Lay’s arm until we got inside the venue. There were a lot of people. A lot, a lot, a lot! Kris is just royalty. Ugh. “Finally!” Hara shouted. She was with Lu Han. They looked really handsome and pretty. Se Hun was with someone but I haven’t seen her before. Maybe a date or a new girlfriend. “Why are you clinging on Lay’s arm like that? Stand straight and act like a lady. You look beautiful in that dress. You have nothing to be ashamed of.” I am ashamed that I’m here! Ugh. I hope this party doesn’t last long but I doubt that’ll happen. “No, don’t listen to her Lay. Just let me hold you. Please.” I begged. “It makes her calm Hara.” Lay said. Oh thank God. “Oh God. I can’t believe this. How’d you expect Kris to see you if you cling like that on Lay?” Hara asked. I don’t want to see Kris and I don’t want him to see me! “I didn’t even want to come here in the first place!” I complained. “But you still did.” OH . NO. I cling unto Lay’s arm more tightly that I think I almost buried my face unto his arm. “Sorry about this Kris. I didn’t tell her to do this. I promise. She insisted.” Lay said. Ugh. I thought he’s going to protect me. “Happy Birthday.” Lay said handing him over a present. OH . I don’t have a present! Damn, how stupid of me! Now I have to cling harder. “Sun Hee. Can you stop that? Don’t cling on Lay like a monkey!” Hara shouted. Ugh. I can’t believe I call her  bestfriend. Everyone laughed at me. Ugh. I can’t do this. No. No. Nooooo. “Why don’t you just greet Kris happy birthday and give your present to him? Go ahead.” Hara said. Oh God. No. I have no present. I’m stupid. What do I do? Ugh. Should I run for it?  “Don’t force her. It’s okay.” Kris said. Is he acting or is this true? “Thanks for coming Sun Hee. It’s nice to see you.” I saw Hara smile like a happy kid.  “Oh umm. Yeah … umm. Happy Birthday.” I said trying to smile. “I need to go to the bathroom.” Lay said. Oh . That means I can’t cling on his arm. Maybe I should just come with him to the bathroom. Oh that’s too crazy. “You’re not going to come with me, are you?” Lay asked me. I stopped clinging unto him and let his arm go. Now I’m standing directly beside Kris. I gave a reluctant smile and avoided awkward eye contact. “I’ll be back.” Lay said.   “Let’s go get food guys. You two talk.” HARAAAAA. Don’t leave me here! I shouted inside my head. I wish you could hear me. I feel like crying. “So, how’ve you been?” Kris asked. We’re so awkward. “I’m good. Uhh. I’m sorry I forgot to buy a present for you.”  “Oh you don’t really have to get me anything. You showing up here at my party’s already enough.” Oh . Don’t blush. Just don’t! “Oh.” I gave an awkward laugh. “You look really pretty.” Oh God. How am I supposed to react to that? Damn it. “Hara bought it for me. Actually, she bought everything. From my dress to my jewelries to my shoes.” My dress was pretty simple. It was peach and it had a little bit of bling on it. There were glitters and some sequins but not too much of it. “Oh. It looks nice.” He smiled. Kris was wearing a grey tuxedo. Obviously, an expensive one.  Kris paused for a while and we just stood awkwardly beside each other but then he began talking again. “So, how’s your fake boyfriend Jong Suk?” So now he’s teasing? What the. “Oh that.” I faked a laugh. “I didn’t know you know about that fake boyfriend of mine.”  “Oh I knew from the start. I just acted like I didn’t know.” The typical Kris.   “Okay, I’m back. Where’s Hara and the others?” Lay asked. “They left to get some food.” Kris answered. “You two seem fine