And after he surprised me with the kiss, he had his arms around me tightly. It was so tight that I wasn’t clear about what’s happening. All of this is just confusing for me.   “Aren’t you going to say something?” He asked with his arms still around me.   I didn’t say anything at all. I don’t think I even understood what he was trying to say. What was he trying to say?    “W-what?” I stumbled.    He removed himself from me and looked at me straight in the eyes.  “I’m sorry for surprising you like this. I just can’t take it anymore. I needed to let this all out. I kept it a secret for a long time but I don’t think I can keep it anymore. I was supposed to tell you but when I found out you were a serial dater, I had second thoughts.”   W-wait. What does that mean? He had second thoughts because he found out I was a serial dater?   “What do you mean by that? Should I perceive that as a good thing or a bad thing?”   “I meant it in a good way. I mean I was just afraid that you were going to dump me if I tried to ask you for another date. I tried to but you rushed out of my car after our first date. Plus, you wouldn’t answer my texts and my calls.”   “Oh that.”   “So what do you say about this? Are you going to give me a chance?”    Oh . A chance? Me and Kris? I don’t know. I don’t think this is going to work out.   “Kris. I – I don’t know.” I stammered with rapid pulses.   “Look, I want you to think about it. Just try. Let’s just try being lovey-dovey tonight. If it doesn’t work out, you can dump me tomorrow.”    “What do you mean lovey-dovey?”   “Oh you are thinking too much again. Just allow me to be sweet and act like a real boyfriend to you tonight. I’m not asking you to, you know, do “it” with me or anything.”   Oh good. If he was, I’m going to pull out his throat.   “And why should I let you do that?”   “Because we’re only going to try.” Kris was serious about this. I can see it in his eyes.   Am I really going to say yes to all of this? I did felt something that I wasn’t really supposed to feel when our lips touched but was it real?   “So?” Kris asked impatiently while he tucked my hair behind my ear.   I couldn’t explain what I felt when he did that. I was really confused.   “I get to dump you when I don’t like it?” I asked almost shaking. My voice even cracked a bit.   “Yeah but I’m really hoping you won’t though.” I couldn’t tell if Kris is happy or mad when he said that. Blame his looking face.   “Well, there’s no harm in trying so – okay. But just for tonight okay? I just want to know what I really want in life.”    I am not in love with Kris. Or am I? I don’t know. I am a really complicated person.   I don’t like relationships but I want to have dates and guys to talk to. Am I out of my mind?   “You’re really agreeing to this?” He asked with a bright expression.   “Y-yeah. I think I just agreed.” I did? What the heck am I thinking? I am insane.   Kris threw his arms around me again. His hug was so tight that I couldn’t expand my poor lungs anymore.   “Y-you’re … crushing me. I … can’t b-breathe.” I said and obviously breathless.   “Oh . Sorry.” He let go of me quickly and chuckled.   It was a bit awkward when we weren’t talking again. When I cleared my throat, someone called our names. It was grandma.   “We’re going to sleep. The room’s ready if you two want to rest too. I already fixed it.” Oh my God. Why didn’t this occur to me? Of course Kris and I are going to share rooms. My grandma and grandpa always thought about that. I mean, in their minds, Kris and I sleep together on one bed.   “Oh. Umm. Okay grandma. Goodnight.” And then she and grandpa were gone.   “We’re sleeping in one room?” Kris asked and he’s obviously happy.   “Yeah. It’s not like we’ve never done that.” I said in a “as-a-mat