"DAE HYUNG!!!!!" Junhong rudely interrupted me from my slumber.

The previous night, Youngjae and I had spent all night playing on the beach. We had not kept track of the time and once we checked our mobile phones for it, it was already half past one. We drove back to our dorm which was an hour's drive away from the beach and by the time we got to bed, it was already three in the morning. To add to it all, we had completely forgotten that the next day was Monday, and that our schedules were back to normal. It also meant that we had to get up at five to get ready for the day.

It was English class and I was already dozing off in the first five minutes.

"What?" I asked, annoyed.

"Yongguk hyung wants to let you know that..." Junhong screwed up his face in concentration, trying to remember what Yongguk had asked him to tell me. "That... If you want to debut with us, you have to prove yourself worthy...and....that also means that you would have to attend vocals lessons as well..."

I groaned in frustration. The day was already going so badly and then, it was going to be worse. Vocals lesson was right after English class and I was planning to skive it off again and sneak in an extra nap. As our lecturer dismissed us, I grudgingly dragged myself to the studio, where I was to attend my first vocal lesson.

"Annyeong haseyo," I bowed low to our instructor, who was a lady.

"Ah! So you're the absent one. I thought you were dead," she sarcastically said.

I ignored her remark and looked around the room. There were only Youngjae, Himchan and Jongup. They all gave me smiles but I returned none. Instead, I took up a chair and sat down beside Youngjae.

"Excellent. Now that we're all finally here, I shall assess each of your abilities and let you know your improvements. We should have done that a long time ago but unfortunately, someone forgot to come," the sarcastic teacher remarked.

I ignored her again and fiddled with my pen. Seeming offended at my indifference, our instructor asked us to divide into pairs and assess each other's vocals. She paired me up with Youngjae as he was the best vocalist among the other three. She then gave us twenty minutes to assess each other.

"What is this? A company or a school?" I said loudly, making sure the teacher overheard me.

She glared at me and told us to continue with our work. Youngjae and I faced each other. I was determinedly not saying anything and he was too shy to start the conversation. We wasted about three minutes staring into space until he finally spoke up.

"Uhm... So do you want to go first or-"

"You go first," I cut him short.

"Er... Ok" Youngjae seemed nervous at the thought of singing first and he cleared his throat. However, when he opened his mouth to sing, I could not help but listen to his voice, it was really the best that I have ever heard, I was completely mesmerised by his smooth voice and I felt myself longing for more when he had ended.

After he sang the last note, Youngjae flushed a deep red and asked me shyly,  "How was it?"

"You're really good. I didn't believe it at first but you're really very good." I hadn't known another occasion when I had praised someone. I rarely did so, in fact, I think it was the first time I had ever issued a compliment.

Youngjae, if possible, flushed an even deeper red and I had to remind myself not to get his hopes up. "But it could use a lot of improvements though. I could see a lot of areas where your singing went wrong," I lied. There was nothing, absolutely nothing, wrong with his singing. It was pitch perfect.

He nodded and said. "I'll work harder. Now it's your turn to sing," he smiled.

Oh , I thought. I didn't want to sing right there and then, and especially not in front of Youngjae. Singing was my weakness as it broke me and sometimes even tore my heart because of the emotions that it brought out of me.

"Er..." I stuttered, trying to think of an excuse.

"It's ok if you're nervous," Youngjae quickly said. "I was like that when I first sang in front of people. And I promise you, I won't laugh."

I almost snorted, as if I was afraid of Youngjae laughing at me. For all I knew, I didn't care.

"My voice is not well these days... So I'm trying to rest it. I can't reach the high notes as it would strain my voice and I would lose it altogether," I made up an alibi.

"I see," there was pure concern in Youngjae's eyes and it made me feel a little guilty for lying to him.

However, just at that moment, a spider dropped on my lap. I stared at it for a second before-

"AAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" I screamed my lungs out and jumped up from my seat, causing the spider to turn a somersault in the air before it landed on the ground. I hated spiders... I really did.

I eyed the spider and sat back down, ignoring the laughters which were coming from the other three. Youngjae even had tears in his eyes.

After he had calmed down, he raised his eyebrows. "Your throat is not well huh?"

I flushed, furious with myself. That incident with the spider was not a good one and I added it to the list of bad incidents that day.

"Fine! I'll sing!" I shouted and both Himchan and Jongup turned silent.

"Well, if you really don't want to, you can just not sing. There's no need to get so pissed off, dude," Himchan told me. "And even if you at singing, just say so. I'm pretty sure the company will put you into something else like a Makeup lesson to improve your pretty face."

I knew Himchan was just joking, but was not in the mood to be joked at right then. I stood up suddenly from my chair, sending it tumbling backwards, and went over to the microphone to grab it.

"Now, everyone listen," I fixed my eyes at the room. "I'm going to show you what I'm capable of. Cause whatever happens, I am going to debut. I will do everything to make sure I debut and if it requires me to sing, then so be it. I'm doing this, right here, right now, to show you that I'm not going to give up to anyone and I'll make sure I'm the best among all of you. I have only one mindset and whatever you do, you will never be able to bring me down."

The tension in the room was heavy. I raised the microphone close to my mouth and opened my mouth to sing the first verse of Baby Baby by 4men. Tears stung in my eyes and I let myself go to the emotions flowing through me. Memories after memories flashed in my mind and I had to do everything I could to not break down on the floor and weep a thousand tears. Flashbacks kept pouring into my mind and I almost could not keep track of all of them until this particular incident rewinded...

//Flashback//

"Hyung, what do you want to ride?" I asked Daeyoung.

He grinned playfully down at me and said, "Let's ride that."

I looked over to where he was pointing and exclaimed. "Oh please not that! Anything but that! Please, hyung, I'm really scared of that ride!"

"Nonsense. It's not even a high speed rollercoaster!" Daeyoung laughed. "And don't worry! Didn't I say that I'll protect you?"

"I...I...but it's really-"

"Come, Daehyun ah. Come ride that with hyung."

"I...f-fine..."

//End of flashback//

The song ended. Tears spilled out of my eyes and I sobbed into my palms. I had been trying my whole life to forget that one incident and then...

I felt arms wrap themselves around me and I cried on whoever came to hug me. I cried harder than I have had for the past two years. All of this had been a traumatizing experience for me. I stopped crying and looked up, surprised to find that I had actually been crying on Youngjae's shoulder. I immediately straightened up, not saying thanks to him, even though I had badly wanted to, so that I would not show him my weak side.

I walked back to my seat as if nothing had happened. Himchan and Jongup stared at me and I snapped at them, "You got a problem?"

"No. It's just that I've never heard you sing. And it doesn't sound like you're bad either. I take back my words," I didn't know why but Himchan's words made me swell with pride. Stop being so egoistic, I told myself.

Suddenly, the door to our studio burst open and our instructor stood at the doorway, her face streaked with tears and her mascara was smeared badly. She crossed the room and leaped onto me, giving me a bone-crushing hug.

"That was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard," she cried into my chest.

I pushed her off, I did not like having random women running at me and hugging me for no reason. And to add to that, I hated people who cry. That was why I repeatedly kicked myself several times for letting myself weep like a cry baby just then. The woman kept crying, I did not know what to say to her or the others either. I was too ashamed to look at Youngjae so I thought that the best thing to do was to walk out of that room. And that, I did.

I went back to my dorm, ignoring the rest of my schedule and just plopped myself on my bed. I had never felt so humiliated in my life. Youngjae must have been thinking what a weakling I was, to cry over a song. I was just about to drift off to sleep when a knock on the door interrupted me. I did nothing to acknowledge the knock. The door opened and Youngjae entered the room, sitting beside me on my bed. I refused to look at him and pretended that I was sleeping.

"Yah, I know you're not sleeping so cut it off," I ignored him and continued 'sleeping'.

He sighed, "Daehyun ah, I'm not here to tease you about what happened earlier... In fact, I don't find anything funny about it. I too, cry sometimes when I sing..." His honest admittance surprised me.

Youngjae went on. "And I know you probably don't want to tell me the reason why but if you ever feel the need to let it all out, just to let you know, I'll be there for you."

I said nothing, I didn't want to entertain this kind of talk.

Seeming unabashed, he continued still. "You have nothing to be afraid of. No one looks down on you. In fact, I think you just earned a new degree of respect from Himchan hyung and Jongup."

I snorted into my pillow and it was already too late to realise that I should have been keeping quiet. Sensing that I was listening to him, Youngjae reached under the covers for my hand.

"And it just makes me love you even more."

I could not tell whether he was joking or not but I still pulled my hand away from him, putting it under my belly. Youngjae sighed and got up to leave. Before he got to the door, he turned around and said one last thing.

"I wasn't kidding when I told you that you've gained respect. It’s really hard to make Himchan hyung respect someone as he has very high standards of both himself and the people around him. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, your voice is really extraordinary and... I just want to let you know that I acknowledge that you're better than me... much better."

With that he left, leaving me in confusion. Why would he just throw away his pride and say something like that? Whatever, I wasn't going to care. However, I could not stop myself from admitting that whatever Youngjae said had made me feel a tad better and that I might actually enjoy singing. Who knew? Maybe Youngjae and I might even be best of friends. I laughed and pushed that thought out of my mind, concentrating deeply on the sleep that my body needed so much.