Chapter 30: Start 1.1

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Lay was happy, very happy when Suho told him that he’ll bring him outside. It brought joy to his heart when he heard about the news. The thought of going outside made him excited and he couldn’t control the adrenaline that rushes in his body.

Giggling a bit, Lay shifts his gaze outside of the window, feeling the familiar excitement run throughout his body. The door opens, revealing Suho wheeling in a wheelchair and closes the door when he got inside. Lay snaps his head towards Suho and gives Suho a gentle smile in which the older returns with a smile also.

“Good morning, Lay. Ready for the trip?” Suho grins at him, showing his excitement also. Lay nods his head and kicked off the blanket from his legs playfully, making it fall to the floor.  Suho chuckles and picks up the blanket from the floor and folds it. Lay bend his knees and Suho places the folded blanket on the end.

Suho goes back to the wheelchair and moves it a bit forward and watches Lay get out from the bed. Lay lands his feet on his slippers and puts them on before sitting on the wheel chair. He shifts a bit, struggling to sit comfortably on the wheelchair and when he does, he claps his hands making Suho slightly smile.

Wheeling the wheelchair toward the door, Suho closes the door behind him, leaving his phone that is ringing on the nightstand.

Kyungsoo-Calling

~*~

They arrived at the balcony garden’s door and Lay was smiling already as he could see the outside world from the opaque doors.

Just a few more steps and I’ll be able to feel and see the outside world again.

Just by thought makes his heart race in happiness yet the fear of the past resurface in his mind that made his smile falter a bit and his shoulders slumped down a bit due to the memory. He hangs his head down, feeling the fear creeps throughout his body.

Suho glances at him, seeing his head hang low and shoulders deflated made him worried.

“Lay?” he calls out to him. The younger turns to him, seeing his worried face.

“Are you okay?” he asks as he stared at the younger’s hazel orbs. Lay flashes him a weak smile and nods his head, pushing back the memory in the back of his mind to stop the fear and pain to control his body. Suho didn’t seem to be convinced from his response and was about to press if he’s okay when he saw the emotions that swirled in the younger’s eyes. 

He sighs and changes his question instead.

“Are you excited?” he asks with a smile. Lay smiles a bit and nods his head; the emotion that his eyes give out proves otherwise. Suho just nods his head to get along with the play that Lay is playing. He left the wheelchair for awhile and opens the opaque door and Lay could feel the breeze of the outside world brush against his feet and he smiles; the familiar feeling of excitement coming back and he closes his eyes.

When Suho opened the opaque door, he goes back to Lay and wheeled the wheelchair pass through the door. He feels the wheelchair moves and Lay feels the wind caress his hair, his face and ruffles his hospital pyjamas. He hears the birds chirping, the noise of the cars on the road, the sweet music of the breeze of the east and the water gushing out from the bamboo.

He feels the wheelchair takes a turn and hears the wheels collide with a wood and Lay concludes that they are passing through a bridge because the familiar sound of the water gets louder in his ears as they continue to move.

He smiles at the sound of the wheel making contact with the wood and before long, they passed the bridge as the distant sound of the water fades before his ears. Lay just smiles as they move, still not are opening his eyes to further excite his surprise and excitement for the outside world.

As the seconds passes by, Lay felt them halt in their move and Lay guesses that Suho decides that this is the place where a beautiful picturesque is waiting for him.

That guy…

Lay takes a deep breath and exhales after before slowly fluttering his eyes open. Once his eyes are open and his vision clears, he takes in the beautiful sight before him. He smiles as his eyes absorbs the wonderful colours around him replacing the sickening colour of white and pale.

The trees are green, the flowers are red, pink, violet-, the trunks are brown, the sky is blue the clouds are white-

Breathing the fresh air of the nature, Lay feels his lungs has been rejuvenated as new and his body eased down from the calmness and beauty that is around him and his smile widens more.

Suho watches him from the start and is glad that the younger likes the surprise he had given. His heart flutters at his genuine smiles from time to time and the sparkle of delight from his hazel orbs that seems to sparkle like a star.

He moves the wheelchair, stopping by a nearby bush and tree that Lay turns to him with a quizzical expression. He smiles in return.

“Feel the leaves,” he says and Lay blinks before facing the bush and slowly his hand pluck a leaf from its stem. His thumb feels the smooth and thin bumps of the leaf and he smiles. It’s different from the fake flower’s leaves he has in his vase in his room. It’s rough and very likely fake when he felt the leaves. And feeling the leaves of true, somehow gave him the excitement of delight and happiness.

Next, he shifts his gaze to the trunk of the tree and he slowly reaches out his arm more and his hand came in contact with the trunk of the tree.

It’s rough.

He feels the scars of the trunk, the rough texture and he pushes his hand more and he smiles a bit.

It’s rough yet so strong.

He pulls away his hand and rested it back to his side when he noticed a beautiful flower on one of the bushes. He turns his head to Suho and Suho grins and nods his head. He wheels him to the bush with the flowers that had caught his attention and when they halted in front of it, Suho knew the flower.

It’s an Azalea.

He smiles a bit, thinking how the two had been coincidentally attached and attracted together. He watches Lay pluck a flower, delicately his other hand caressing the petals. Lay feels the petals and feels the smooth and frail petals of the flower.

It’s so delicate...so weak yet so beautiful.

Two thoughts in one, Suho unconsciously reaches out for the flower in Lay’s hand and their fingers brushes in the slightest and Lay felt the slight jolt in his body but he ignored it-the warm heat filling his cheeks in return.

Suho takes the flower from him earning him a confused look from Lay. He smiles and slowly places the flower behind his ear, complimenting his locks and face, showing a true beauty in Suho’s eyes. He smiles at him and Lay finds his heart races, stomach filling up with butterflies and cheeks filling with warmth again.

He finds him falling for the older.

And something lit up inside of him.

“You could fight for someone you love, Yixing. Your fear couldn’t separate you from the one you love. Try your best to fight. Everything reaps from hard work, after all.”

He remembers the words of his cousin, telling him the words of the weak and fights his phobia. He remembers the memories from before and how his life grew without a love of his own and now, he sees himself falling for Suho.

It’s been a few months since he was with the older. He feels the love that swirls in his heart and the unending affection for the older. There are a few signs, his cousin once told him, that those signs tell him that is in love.

And in the end of those signs, he feels something stir up on him and he would just come to a realization that he is in love with that person and Lay is sure that everything happened to him.

He blushes and quickly turns away, eyes frantically in panic and Suho looks at him in bewilderment but says nothing.

~*~

Noon falls down and evening stars shows up in the sunset sky as two men watches the sun slowly goes down to fall asleep. Suho hums a song as Lay listens to it with content and ease. He smiles at his voice and comments it down like an angel’s voice that soothes someone’s soul and eases someone’s trembling musings.

A tear feel from his eyes, not because of sad-related but because of happiness, he felt happiness for the first time of the years he had lived his life and he was happy for that. More tears flows out from his eyes and Suho took notice of the droplets.

He quickly went in front of him, face filled with worry and questions.

“Lay, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” Suho asks in concern as he saw the tears from Lay. His heart seems to stop as he saw the tears.

“Lay, Lay, what’s wrong?” Suho asks again. Lay shakes his head, wanting to tell him it’s nothing, but Suho gave up on the idea of pushing it aside.

“Lay, tell me. What’s wrong? So that I could help you,” Suho worriedly asks, pressing Lay to tell him what’s wrong because he needs to know to help him. Lay shakes his head and with tear-filled eyes, he took Suho’s hand that was gripping the edge of the wheelchair. With delicate hands he took his hand into his palm as Suho looked at him in fear and in confusion, and gently placed his other hand over the older’s hand.

Suho looked at him with beyond confusion and fear starts to build up on him as he remembered Lay’s phobia. He felt Lay shudder and cringe and he could see more tears fall down from his eyes and he felt guilty, scared and worried.

“Lay, I-let go,” he says, his voice cracking as he sees the younger’s body shaking.

“Lay, stop. Let g-,” he shuts up when Lay gripped his hand and he looked at him quizzically.

Just let me do this. Let me try to fight my fear, please, just please let me try.

Suho looks at him in worry but he didn’t say anything anymore, but he smiles instead. His other hand reaches out for his face and he wipes off the tears from the younger's eyes making the younger look at him with tears. He slowly takes out his hand from his hold and he wipes away the tears that continue to spill.

“Lay…” Suho softly calls out and Lay stifles a sob. Suho caresses his cheek and he leans away. Suho smiles at him and tries again; this time he doesn’t lean away.

“You shouldn’t force yourself to fight your fear so fast, Lay. It takes time,” he wipes of the last remaining tears from the younger’s face and gently smiles at him.

“You can’t do it by yourself. Let me help you, though. I’m your nurse and friend after all.”

Lay could feel tears well up in his eyes again. He’s going too fast, he knows. He just wanted to be free from his fear and he wanted to make more friends. He wanted to be free from being pitied, worried and being an outcast. He doesn’t want those anymore, he just wanted to be free from his old life.

Suho look at him tenderly and takes his hand in his palm and placed his other hand over and looks at Lay with a gentle smile that made the younger feel the affection from him.

“I’m here, Lay. Let’s do this together. It may take time, but at least you’re not alone doing this. I’m here by your side, to help you and be with you,”

His body eased down from his words and he could feel heart beat normally and is calm. Lay wanted to kill himself when he saw the tears fall down from Suho’s eyes. He sees the anxiousness, the pain, the worry, and the concern and love from the older’s eyes. His chest tightens and he cries together with him.

The sun goes down with their tears and new step.

~*~

The night is up and Kris doesn’t know why he is buying an ice cream but for some matter, he is buying an ice cream in a convenience store in the neighbourhood. He finds himself buying three pints of different flavours of ice cream and he wonders why he is doing this.

He goes to the cashier and drops off the three pints of ice cream and takes out some bills and gives it to the lady in charge. He picks up the plastic bag from the counter and leaves the store. On his way, his mind seems to occupy a lot of thoughts, considering Minho’s birthday in a few days now, school, Tao and others. Talking about Tao, Kris remembers the day when Tao gave his number and their first text conversation which had turn out good that sent off Kris smiling for the whole night and Minho questioning his sanity and being.

They met up last two days ago after a few days prior of their accidental meeting in the café. They just randomly talked and ate during their time before Kris drops him off to Luhan’s hotel. It’s just a normal meet up of friends, as Kris had thought of it. It’s not likely to have more than that, but he has this negative feeling in the future that will surely mess him and that he doesn’t know what to do with it.

Sighing a bit, Kris adjusts his scarf that was securely wrapped around his neck. Fall is coming soon and the humid in the night had changed already, making the wind a bit cool than warm.

He spot a familiar raven-haired boy on the way back, who is sitting on a bench that is outside the convenience store. Unconsciously, his feet led him to the boy who sitting on the bench.

“Tao,” he calls out to him and the boy looks up to him with wide eyes. He watches the boy mouths his name in a manner of surprise. He raised an eyebrow, thought filled with a question of ‘what is he doing here in late night?’

It was late night already and this boy is still outside and somehow, Kris is worried for him and wanted to scold him for being late outside and he remembers that they are merely stranger-friends zone and he has no right to do that at all. He restrained himself from doing it and just asks him a question.

“What are you doing outside at this late night?”

“I’m waiting for someone,” was his reply. Kris takes a glance inside the convenience store before shifting his gaze back to Tao and nods his head. He takes in his form and found that the younger is shivering a bit from the cold. He sighs at Tao’s clumsiness and takes off his scarf and wrapped it around Tao’s neck to warm him up from the cool weather.

Tao looks at him in a quizzical manner and he just smiles.

“Take it. You need to warm yourself from this cool weather and a humid like this is bad for you,” was all his reply and Tao looks at him in shock. The younger shook his head, not wanting the scarf and was mid-way to take it from his neck when Kris’s strong hands prevent him from doing it. He looks up to the older and wonder why.

“Just take it, okay? Think of it as a gift from me from your belated birthday.”

Kris flashes him a smile and Tao couldn’t say ‘no’ anymore and just watches Kris’s retreating back until the older is out of his line of sight.

[Tao’s Point of View]

This is totally unexpected. I did not expect this to happen at all. Nope, not at all and here I am, still shocked by the fact that Kris gave me his scarf to keep me warm under the cool weather of the night. I have to smack Luhan in the head for this.

I remembered staying in my bed, reading some magazine while in my wardrobe and sipping a hot chocolate when Luhan bursts into my room and almost jumped on me just to tell me to accompany him to buy some snacks in late night. I, of course, refused to accompany him by the fact that it’s already late night and why I have to be the victim of his late night snacks. He used his sickening aegyo and puppy eyes just to have me stand up, push him out of room, changed my clothes and accompany him to buy some late night snacks and him squealing in delight and shower me a lot of thanks, kisses and hugs.

And when we arrived at the convenience store, I was told to wait outside because it will just take a short time and I just agreed, but I didn’t know it will take so damn long to the point that someone that I knew and had met a few days ago approached me.

“Tao.”

Well, damn. I never knew he would approach me and that he would catch me in surprise. I saw his eyebrow raised and I could already read his thoughts, thinking what I am doing late night. Well, you could blame Luhan for it because of his obsession of late night snacks.

I inwardly sighed when I heard him ask me a question.

I mouthed my answer back and he just nods his head. I shivered a bit at the cool wind that passed by and I rub my hands on my arms to warm me up when all of a sudden; he wrapped his scarf around me that caught me in shock and surprise.

I looked at him quizzically and he just smiles. Why? Why would you give me your scarf?

“Take it. You need to warm yourself from this cool weather and a humid like this is bad for you,” was all his reply.  I shook my head. I can’t do that. This is yours and I can’t have it and Luhan is almost finished, anyways, I hope so, but anyways, I can’t.

I was mid-way in taking it off when his hands stopped me from doing so. I looked up to him and questions him through my eyes.

“Just take it, okay? Think of it as a gift from me from your belated birthday.”

I felt my jaw slacken in shock and my body froze in his words. His voice feels so strong, commanding yet warm in concern and affection. I couldn’t continue what I’m supposed to do and just watched his retreating back leave my sight.

I sighed. This is not what I wanted to happen but for some reason, I’m glad that we met. No, it’s not because I’m developing a crush on him but somehow, I feel eased at his presence around me. I feel secure and safe when he’s around and him wrapping a scarf around my neck just to keep me warm-that I concluded that he’s worried for me, it makes my heart flutter.

I smiled to myself, feeling happy by the encounter when a shuffle of footsteps from behind distracts me. I saw Luhan with four plastic bags on his hands and I just shaked my head because wrappers and such are going to mess my room-again.

“I’m done!” he playfully cheers with a radiating smile-oh how wonderful for him. His eyes sparkled and I cringed because that’s not good. He stares at me for a moment and I felt that I’m being undressed under his stare.

 “What?” I asked him, confusingly. He has this scrutinizing stare at me and I don’t like it at all.

“Zizi…” he starts and I’m dreading of what he is going to say next and I’m sure I do not like it at all. He looked at a certain angle and I’m not sure what it is. Wait. Is he…? . No. Luhan, I can ex-

“Where did that scarf come from?”

Too innocent for my liking and I’m sure the night’s going to be long.

Interrogation here I come.

[End of Point of View]