Chapter 19: Silent Knowing

A 'Sulay' chapter...

“Yes, Dir. Xing. I’ve done the latest check-up on him and did some tests and there were no problems at all.” Suho nimbly answered back. Dir. Xing called up to him after a day or two when he e-mailed Lay’s father about what happened. He was reminded to tell him if anything comes up and he did so.

He was rather taking a nap on his break when a familiar tune rang on his ears and he met with a familiar calm-yet panic was evident-voice. Before he could even greet, he was already bombarded with questions about Lay and Suho knew he explained in the e-mail very well what happened a few days ago.

Shrugging it off, he explained it back to square one and when he finished explaining, he heard a relieved sigh from the other line and Suho couldn’t help but smile. Dir. Xing was worried of his son and he completely understand what the father is feeling when he is away and his son is almost dead by the second and he’s not there.

Asking about the check-ups and tests, Suho responded back with pretty much of a ‘yes’ and told the director that there were no problems that occurred or were seen in the tests and he could feel the director smiling on the other line at the results.

“That’s great, Suho. I would expect you to do your job very well and I want you to report to me immediately if anything happens or if you find anything in the tests, okay?” The latter instructed and Suho hummed in response, twirling the pen by his fingers.

“Suho…” Dir. Xing trailed off and Suho knew he’s going to ask something-and he thinks he knew very well what the director is going to ask.

“Yes, Dir. Xing?” He whispered as he stopped twirling the pen and look at the empty desk across him before focusing back on the tests results of Lay on his desk.

“Is Lay…you…are you two comfortable with each other now?” Dir. Xing asked in somewhat anxious voice and Suho knew what Dir. Xing what is trying to say. He didn’t want to let Dir. Xing be disappointed with him but at the same time, he can’t lie. He decided to tell the truth than to lie; it’s better that way.

Suho hesitated for a moment, but sighed before apologizing, “I’m sorry Dir. Xing. Somehow, our relationship seems to grow awkward more when the last time I tried to help him sit up. He doesn’t seem to trust me, yet.” He uttered with disappointment dripping in his voice and Dir. Xing didn’t fail to notice it.

“Suho…”Dir. Xing sighed before continuing, “hang in there okay?”

Suho shuts his eyes and an image of a frightened Lay fleeted in his mind and he opens them back with pain visible in his glassy orbs.

“I will. I will.”

~*~

Suho walks down the hallway, hand occupied with a tray of food for Lay's lunch. His mind replaying his conversation with Dir. Xing awhile ago. He wasn't sure if what he responded to Dir. Xing was right, but he hopes that at least he'll keep his word to the latter.

Halting in front of a familiar door, Suho in deep of air before breathing out and forcing a smile. Sliding the door with his free hand, he comes in, finding Lay taking a chomp of peach. Taking notice of a presence in the room, Lay snaps his head to the door and found Suho with a tray on his hand containing his lunch and a smile that was somehow forced.

This morning, he was smiling like usual as he took a test from him-which was by the way took several hours before Suho injected a medication for sleeping in the IV bag and finding himself sleep. He doesn't remember what happened next and he remembers waking up with bullets of sweat.

Seeing Suho comes walking towards him with a rather forced smile, Lay wonders what happened to him and he somehow found the older peculiar. Suho, not noticing that Lay is worrying about him, placed the tray of food on his lap and grins sadly.

"Eat up and I'll come back for it later, okay?" He whispered and somehow Lay caught his words and nodded his head numbly. He nodded his head and left without a word making Lay flinch when the door shuts.

~*~

Lay dazedly looks at the window, eyes focused not outside, but somewhere. It's been 2 hours since Suho took the tray from him, coming in without a word and leaving without a word and making him concluding that something indeed happened to Suhoa dn that he wasn't in the mood. Lips tightly shut, fragment of what happened few days ago fleeted in his mind and he pursed his lips.

Somehow, he felt guilty and somehow, his guts were telling him that he was part of his dull mood today. He concluded that  it may be the past days that they were together, it didn't go unnotice to him about Suho's sad smiles and sad eyes and he knew he was the cause of those.

He knew Suho was only trying to help him, but his brain thinking otherwise, there’s a zero percent chance for his body to react like he wanted to. Suho wasn’t at fault for not knowing his phobia back then when they first met.

He wasn’t angry at him or so, but he feels ashamed for who he is, having phobia and other illnesses and sickness that outcasts him and deemed him as a weak, pathetic and useless human being that didn’t deserve to live. He observes Suho with awe and admiration secretly and how he longed his mind and heart would realize that Suho wasn’t a bad person and that he was like his father-or is an angel, like his father told him.

He wished to let Suho know that he’s not afraid of him, that he trusted him and that he wants to be friend with him. He wanted him to know that he trusted him like his trust for his father; he wanted to let Suho know that he isn’t afraid of him and that his mind was stupid and that it’s the one that is afraid but his heart wasn’t.

He trusts him and his heart does to.

Closing his eyes, a tear fell down.

A/N: Hello~ Yeah, I know it's short, but I wanted to delve into what they are feeling and letting you see that Lay does trust Suho and that Suho is quite hurt and disappointed. Uh...yeah. Share your thoughts about this chapter? :)

I don't feel like asking a question today, but asks a favor to all of you.

Will you pray for the people in China and EXO especially our dear Luhan?

Thanks guys, love ya all.