"Angels cry because they want to experience what you and I feel: the moment. They live in eternity. They don't know what it's like to read a newspaper and get ink on your fingers. They don't know what it is like to take your shoes off and wiggle your toes under the dinner table."

When did everything go wrong? It all seemed amazingly wonderful in the beginning but now it’s all ruined. Seunghyun sighed as he rounded a corner, even Seungri was silent in the backseat. He wondered if it would have been better to keep the angel at home, babysitting was never his thing. At least not when it turned into something like this before they even sped up.

Jiyong had been bouncing happily before they went into the car and Seunghyun was just happy he couldn’t speak since it would probably cause him another headache. Seungri would probably cover that. And then here they were, in the car driving towards Nine and Seunghyun had promptly decided that he wanted to be the one in control of the vehicle. Seungri was silently observing Jiyong’s gleeful expression which quickly turned meek and scared. Jiyong never thought the car would go this fast, it was terrifying and with every slight turn they made he thought they would all tumble out of the road or have someone else run into them. At first he tried to tell himself that it was safe, completely normal to drive at this speed or even faster but he never convinced himself and couldn’t help himself from clutching onto the seat so hard his knuckles turned white. Sometimes he even had to close his eyes and he yelped soundlessly several times. He almost hoped he could pass out and escape the torture he was being put through.

The two other men looked at him incredulously while they drove. At first Seunghyun wasn’t sure about what the angel was so afraid of but he quickly put the pieces together after about ten minutes. He could understand a fear of driving or the speed but the way the angel looked like he was about to pass out from fear, skin paler than usual made him think twice. His younger friend seemed equally fascinated but he wasn’t the type to wonder in silence.

“Jiyong, are we going too fast?” The angel turned his head shakily towards Seungri and shook his head with a grim expression. Of course not, he wouldn’t want to inconvenience them, surely if they went any slower they would be annoyed. Seungri didn’t seem convinced by his answer and Jiyong wouldn’t be either, but he had to at least pretend to be fine. While pressing his head back into the seat he scrambled about as they slowed down in front of a red light. His own heart was pounding hard but he was momentarily distracted by Seungri’s distinct laugh behind him.

“Seriously man, I don’t understand how you’ve survived, being this petrified of cars or whatever has to major-”

“Seungri, watch your language.” Seunghyun interrupted harshly with a glare. The younger man seemed put off and huffed slightly.

“What, you never had a problem before?” The younger man had a point, Seunghyun never really cared about his swearing. It was just that Jiyong might not like it and the thought of defiling the pure boy- No, Seunghyun don’t go there.

“I just think that you should be more polite to Jiyong, you’re not friends.” He shifted his gaze from Seungri to Jiyong’s fear struck face. The blonde was breathing heavily but finally relaxing a little since they stopped the car. Unfortunately he hadn’t really focused on their conversation and felt a little bad. He had to swallow dryly when Seunghyun looked at him but he broke into a full-blown grin right after. Seunghyun had to look away and grit his teeth since butterflies were doing ing somersaults in his stomach and they were not supposed to do that.

“Jiyong, we’re driving again,” The car sped up and Jiyong had to close his eyes and pray silently, wanting their trip to end soon. Seungri laughed some more and spent the rest of the trip trying to engage the blonde in a one sided conversation.

When they finally arrived at Nine, the angel was far too stiff to even exit the car. He wasn’t even moving and quite frankly Seunghyun was becoming a little worried. He tried nudging Jiyong to get a reaction but it looked like the angel was about to break into tears. That’s why he sent Seungri for his own car not so far away while he would attempt to get the blonde moving. The younger man went with a few protests and Seunghyun opened the door on Jiyong’s side. After a few seconds he found himself with a handful of Jiyong clutching on to him like a baby monkey. He stuttered in his steps and tried to ignore the strange looks from other passing people.

Jiyong wasn’t crying, he was just relieved they had stopped moving and he finally had something firm to latch on to. He felt safe in Seunghyun’s arms, sighing as the other man rubbed his hand on his back soothingly. The taller rested his chin on top of the blonde mop and inhaled. It smelled nice. On the other hand, the angel felt his limbs coming back alive and he pulled away carefully, smiling gratefully at Seunghyun. He tried mouthing a ‘thank you’ and by the looks of it, the other man understood.

They waited a few minutes until Seungri arrived with Seunghyun’s car, pulling up next to them. The older of the two decided promptly that Seungri was unable to follow them and had to go somewhere else to have fun.

“Fine, whatever, I’ll see you later Jiyong-hyung.” He clapped the angel on his shoulder before scoffing at Seunghyun and going back to his car, driving away. Jiyong felt a little bad but he wanted to let him decide and didn’t protest. However, he had to spend a few minutes calming himself before he got into Seunghyun’s car again so they could go eat at this ‘Mc Donalds’ place. It helped a lot that he got to hold onto the other man’s arm from the backseat as he drove. It was almost like a back hug to Seunghyun and he swore to kill whatever that was partying in his stomach again.

Again he found himself stuffing his face while Jiyong frowned at his food. He’d offered the angel some but he politely declined and sat silently next to him, judging his burger. While deep in thought he started thinking about what happened last night. He barely remembered something about some blonde girl he made out with and Jiyong, but that was probably just a coincidence. He wasn’t sure if he actually met Jiyong or not, it was all hazy.

“Jiyong,” The angel focused on him after hearing the deep voice wanting his attention. “Did I… Did I meet you yesterday? I mean when I was drunk?” He tried to choose his words carefully seeing as he probably was wasted beyond belief and might’ve done something stupid. Usually he only had to take care of himself when he was out having fun, but this time he felt like he’d done something. Seeing the pale cheeks turn red in front of him gave him a vague idea something might’ve actually happened.

“Oh god, I didn’t… do anything weird right?” His voice sounded hopeful and tired at the same time and Jiyong tried to not remember how good the man looked half . Even so he had to tell the truth and his gestures failed miserably when he had to show what he was doing with the blonde woman. After Seunghyun embarrassingly made him stop because of the weird stares around him, he pulled out the same feather pen and started scribbling on the white table surface.  Seunghyun thought it was lucky they were seated in a corner where no staff could pop up and yell at them.

The drawings showed him the woman he remembered and then another blonde, which was probably Jiyong and he groaned into his hands.

“Don’t tell me I did that in front of you,” He felt ill, it was embarrassing and he felt like he’d soiled the eyes of a child. Except that Jiyong was not a child. But still very much like one. Jiyong’s face became beet red before he vigorously shook his head. This was going poorly, his explanation was bad and the other man seemed to become more and more upset. Air filled his cheeks as he thought of a way he could draw it clearly. This was harder than he thought it would be, he caught himself mouthing words a lot of times as if he actually had a voice. In the end he had to mix gestures and drawings and tried to tell him that he had in fact left right after, and Seunghyun followed him.

Another groan came from the taller and Jiyong’s brain froze for a moment, subconsciously focusing on the sound only. He just told him that he hugged the angel before they left and then they literary slept together. Seunghyun was dumbfounded for a moment, thinking they actually had but that would be ridiculous. He was relieved to see that they, or at least he, just went straight to sleep. When he finished, Jiyong felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulder and he slumped back in his chair with a relieved smile.  They sat in silence for a while and Seunghyun took the opportunity to finish his fries as well loving the wonderful greasy texture especially much during a hangover. The angel had turned his attention elsewhere and was observing children playing around next to them. He observed the blonde in kind and marveled again at how unreal he seemed. Was he the only one noticing this?

The children were giggling loudly and running around and it was fun to watch but in reality Jiyong’s mind was somewhere entirely different. Actually he was thinking about how he would be able to help Seunghyun after realizing how difficult it is without speech. He was sure the other was wondering about the same. He thought he should ask the high angel later and hope Seunghyun didn’t demand answers from him just yet.

“Let’s go, I sort of promised to take you shopping, didn’t I?” Jiyong perked up at this, following him quickly outside. The dreaded car was waiting for him in the parking lot but he was surprised when Seunghyun told him they were going to the stores close by to save him the extra ride to a shopping mall.

All the clothing Jiyong picked out was surprisingly unique, colorful and something he would never wear. But he had to admit the angel looked good in everything he wore. It’s probably because he’s not human. Seunghyun frowned to himself as they left the last store, a few of Jiyong’s bags in hand. Luckily he had some money saved up but somehow the angel did too. Or maybe he had a black hole full of money in his pocket, Seunghyun wasn’t sure. The blonde was walking next to him while nibbling on his lower lip, wondering if the taller was angry with him for spending a lot of time inside the stores. Somehow the staffs were drawn towards him and would never let him be even if he couldn’t talk to them. It was nice, everyone were really kind to him.

The only thing that was actually bothering Seunghyun was that the painkillers were wearing off and he was becoming really tired.  He didn’t mind watching Jiyong being extremely fascinated by every little thing he stumbled over like the register or additional lamps or commercials, it was really entertaining. Still, it was difficult to shake off his weariness. Jiyong was worried and watched Seunghyun have a conversation with himself inside his mind, his expressions changing every other second.

When they arrived home and the blonde almost had to be carried inside, Seunghyun plopped down on the couch as Jiyong tried to calm his breathing and force his legs to stop shaking. He told himself that he had to try getting used to cars even though it was going to be a real trial. Seunghyun closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, exhausted to his very core. It smelled like Jiyong though and he unconsciously buried himself more into the blankets, muttered some nonsense and promptly let darkness cover his mind.

It took a few moments before Jiyong realized Seunghyun had fallen asleep. He watched the familiar calm rising of his broad chest and settled himself on the floor with his back against the couch. A few minutes passed as he peacefully listened to the other’s calm breathing. He had to smile to himself, it was really nice, Jiyong felt very blessed to be able to be by his side if only for a short while. This was a good opportunity to ask for advice from the high angel and he lowered his head while mouthing prayers.

The high angel’s smile was brilliant as always and he welcomed Jiyong with open arms. It was also very nice to hear his own voice again.

“High angel, I am at a loss and need your advice.” Daesung nodded reassuringly and encouraged him to continue. “I don’t know how to help Seunghyun, I can’t even talk.” The high angel blinked before letting his soft voice guide him.

“Show him the light, show him that there is someone who cares for him,” Suddenly his eyes widened slightly before the smile returned to his face, laughter in his voice. “I’m sure you can do it, I can see you care for him very much. But unfortunately our conversation must be cut short this time because a certain someone is demanding your attention.” Jiyong furrowed his brows in confusion. Then he felt it, the pull from reality and the distant sound of Seunghyun’s voice calling. He didn’t have time to say his goodbyes before he opened his eyes to a face full of Seunghyun. It startled him and he pushed back into the couch with a gasp, he was kneeling too close to him.

“Are you okay? You were talking in your sleep, or mouthing words in your sleep.” The other man looked shocked and worried and Jiyong wondered when he got down on the floor. “And you were kind of… glowing.” He searched his eyes for an answer but Jiyong didn’t have one. It never crossed his mind that he looked strange when talking to the high angel or even lit up but apparently he did. Maybe he should’ve been more careful as to not worry the other. A short silence passed and Seunghyun was losing his patience but all bad thoughts disappeared when the angel took his hand and squeezed it reassuringly. The blonde gave him a thumb up and he had to chuckle at how silly it was. Jiyong was sorry he woke Seunghyun from his rest and wanted to make it up to him. And he did with a hug.

It felt right at the moment and anything else in the world seemed less important. Seunghyun tensed in confusion before he felt himself hug the smaller back and relaxing again. He wasn’t sure why they were hugging but it was nice and he had absolutely no problem with it. Unfortunately it was like his brain exploded when he felt what were probably unintentional lips against his neck as Jiyong pulled back but not completely and looked at him with that adorable red color on his face. It was hard to stay rational, the ability was almost lost to him when the angel was this close. He was probably going to hell for even thinking about doing naughty stuff with the blonde but he could always worry about that later. Unfamiliar sparks were jumping across the angel’s skin and he had never felt like this before. He knew he harbored something for Seunghyun but he couldn’t put words on what. Now that they were this close, sitting on the floor and facing each other in a half-hug, Jiyong had huge difficulty moving away.

With the amount of skinship the two of them had had, he was surprised how just hugging the man affected him deeply. Seunghyun on the other hand had difficulties restraining himself and was battling a war in his mind as he slowly leaned forward. The angel was observing him with wide eyes and something in the back of his mind told him that he probably was going to regret this later. Like a lot. Seunghyun kept his eyes trained on Jiyong’s full, delicious lips as he nudged his nose with his own carefully. Slowly he shifted his gaze to his eyes as if to ask for permission and took in the adorably flustered face. When Seunghyun closed the distance between them Jiyong’s brain short circuited and melted more or less out of his ears.

It was only a soft press of their lips but it had his heart thundering in his chest. He tightened his hold around his neck as Seunghyun kissed him softly a few more times. It was sweet and had it been anyone else, Seunghyun would have thought it was sickly sweet. Maybe a little too much. But this, this was beyond perfect. It was difficult not to have his way with Jiyong on the floor right there and then which made him unable to open his eyes right away as they separated, having to collect his sanity slowly. On the other hand, Jiyong his lips and opened his eyes slowly as his hands unconsciously carded through the short hair on the back of Seunghyun’s neck. He thought it was right and wrong and the same time but the way his skin was tingling and he secretly wanted another kiss from the other convinced him he was right.

The way his thin fingers were touching his neck sent shivers down his spine and it was driving him insane but he startled when Jiyong withdrew with a sharp gasp and stood up, flustered and fiddling nervously with the hem of his shirt. He raised an eyebrow as he looked at him from the floor. Seriously? Did he go too far? He didn’t want to scare the angel away, maybe he should’ve brushed it off as a joke. The angel’s conscience was weighing heavily on him and he was convinced he did something wrong. Or it was more like he didn’t know what to feel, his everything was just a huge mess and he didn’t quite know how to react when Seunghyun stood up next to him with a sigh.

This was really messed up. Seunghyun was beginning to have second thoughts. They didn’t know each other, Jiyong was some strange entity and it was not some strange one night stand he’d had one too many of. He wanted to say something though, anything to relieve the awkward tension between them. Also he felt that it would be wise to not get any closer to him until he managed to control himself.

“I’m just gonna…uh,” He didn’t finish that sentence and just walked into his room silently to think. Jiyong watched him leave with tears on the brink of his eyes and confusion clouding his mind. He didn’t want Seunghyun to go, he wanted to say he was sorry. It was his fault and he would never want him to be angry at him. It took a moment but Seunghyun reappeared again after hearing the silent sniffling coming from the angel since it was impossible to ignore. The tears falling from Jiyong’s eyes were like crystals and though it was heartbreaking to see, it was also one of the most beautiful things he’d ever laid his eyes upon. Knowing from experience that Jiyong felt reassured by body contact he embraced the smaller frame tightly and sighed again.

Whatever he had done, he now felt forgiven and could force himself to stop crying. He couldn’t inconvenience Seunghyun further and shook his head lightly before pulling away from the embrace. The taller looked down in surprise and saw him mouth ‘sorry’ with an apologetic expression which actually made him laugh. Seunghyun was unable to hold his laughter, Jiyong was ridiculously precious and innocent to him. If anything it was entirely Seunghyun’s fault for causing this thing between them and yes, he was pretty sure he was going to hell for this.

When he studied the blonde’s confused expression he figured they, or at least he, were definitely going to have to work hard.

To be continued...

A/N: My goal in life is to give you all cavities because of the cute. Anyway thanks for reading! I'm playing Monster on repeat and drooling at the MV. It's very inspiring, gives me a lot of ideas.