“How are you feeling?”

“I’ve been better.”

“But you have told him?”

“I have,” A pregnant pause passed. “I hoped I would feel a bit better after telling, at least emotionally if not physically…” Jiyong trailed off, watching Seunghyun stumbling about the kitchen. A small smile appeared on his lips as he returned his attention back to the conversation he was having with the gatekeeper. The presence of his dear friend in his mind comforted him just as much as it would have if he’d been right next to him at the time. Seunghyun knew Jiyong was praying, talking with someone although he didn’t know who.

“Are you ready to leave?” Although Youngbae knew the answer, he probably asked just to be nice. His voice was sincere and comforting and Jiyong smiled bitterly but didn’t answer.

“Is he ready for your departure?” This was one of the hardest parts for the angels when they decide to reveal themselves to the humans. Many humans, much like Seunghyun, weren’t ready to be left alone at all and quite frankly, Jiyong did not know what would happen then. How would they be happy if something as big as the presence of a loved one suddenly disappeared? Surely they would be left with a feeling of emptiness.

“As selfish as it may sound, I don’t think so.” He could hear Youngbae humming before their conversation ended. The gatekeeper shooed him back to Seunghyun and demanded that they enjoyed their last hours together, how painful it may be, it would all be worth it in the end.

Seunghyun watched Jiyong blink his eyes and look straight ahead before his focus returned to him with a sweet smile. Returning his smile, he walked over and settled down next to him with a sigh. The blonde grabbed his hand with his soft ones and squeezed lovingly, making his chest tighten around his heart. However he could only watch as Jiyong gradually turned an unhealthier shade of pale and it pained him all the way to his bones.

“I have to admit I don’t really know what to say… or do,” He fought the tears again, blinking rapidly and looking down at their joined hands. “Whatever they do to me, I don’t think I’ll be able to forget you.” Surreal was the only thing he could call this situation. Not only did he have to watch the angel wither and die, he wouldn’t be able to honor his memory later. Then he felt warm lips on his knuckles and raised his head to see Jiyong kissing his hands with a sad look.

“I talked to Youngbae,” He pushed Seunghyun’s open palm against his own cheek and closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation. “He was sad as well, I think they’re watching over us too.” A small smile spread on his lips when he felt the slightly larger thumb caress his cheek.

“Why would he be sad?” Seunghyun choked out.

“I do not know, maybe he does not want us to separate either.” Honestly he wasn’t sure why. He could feel his friends sadness when they talked but he never told him why. Seeing as the gatekeeper had sent thousands of angels back and forth before him, he didn’t see any reason as to why he suddenly became this sad.

“Then remind me to thank him later,” It was a low whisper that lightened the mood slightly between them and Jiyong shifted his tired body so that he could easier reach his lips. Although the angel’s body was on its deathbed, he could still feel the familiar spark and current of emotions surging through him whenever their lips touched. Sinking his fingers into the other man’s hair he sighed and just let himself feel. Seunghyun’s comforting weight on his body and the way they kissed for what seemed like an eternity had his cheeks filled with blood after they separated. Not too far though, he still had his forehead resting against his and only seconds passed before he could feel the other man pepper his face with small kisses. It demanded all his willpower to not break into tears at the sweet action and he closed his eye, inhaling slowly.

Feeling Jiyong’s movements falter slightly he ended it with a final peck to his lips and let the angel rest against the couch, body almost going limp. He wanted him to rest, wanted him to get better and healthy. Something in him told him that it was the right thing, that Jiyong was human and by resting he would recover quickly. The truth hurt, knowing that Jiyong wasn’t going to be better no matter what he did had his shoulders tense and tears on the verge of falling every time he laid eyes on the fragile form that once seemed so powerful. How could everything change so quickly?

Still holding his hand, Jiyong looked into his eyes with his never faltering smile.

“Thank you.”

“Do you think you can sing for me again later? I was thinking I could record it…” Saying something like that was like acknowledging the fact that Jiyong was leaving and almost accepting it and it hurt as well. But he refused to think about it like that, he just wanted to do it. Jiyong breathed slowly, thinking about it carefully and he almost became nervous.

“Of course, I will be happy to.” He let out a relieved puff of air and nodded gratefully, extracting himself from the couch to get his phone. Never had he used it for a purpose like this but he knew that if he would eventually forget the angel, he could at least have this on his phone, praying that it would never be lost. When he found it he quickly returned to the couch and held the soft hands in his again. Somehow it felt like he wouldn’t leave when he did, that Jiyong would stay with him forever.

“When I talked to Youngbae,” Seunghyun’s heart clenched at his attempted small talk in that tired voice. “I accidentally told him about Seungri wanting to see him again…” He only smiled when Seunghyun chuckled lightly, imagining how happy his younger friend would be if he knew.

“Really?” Slowly brushing his knuckles along the angels cheeks, he tried to keep the conversation going.

“Youngbae became worried that he might do something like that again and told me he will keep an eye on him from now on,” Feeling that despite the pale color of his skin, the angel was still quite warm settled his nerves slightly. “Maybe he will visit him if he has the opportunity. I wish I could tell Seungri the news.”

“Well, I can text him now. He doesn’t deserve it though.” Reaching for his phone with a chuckle he quickly typed in a short message and sent it, not really interested in a reply. A few minutes later his phone buzzed with an uncharacteristically short text from Seungri which only said ‘tell him I say thank you :’).’ He showed it to Jiyong who only chuckled in turn and closed his eyes.

“I hope they get along, Seungri is a great friend.”

“Yeah.”

Time was running short, the hours passed as they did nothing but talk and comfort each other. Seunghyun knew that by midday the next day the angel might be gone already and he refused to leave his side. Jiyong felt a little better and moved himself from the couch and out on the balcony, wanting to feel the fresh air on his skin. With help from Seunghyun he didn’t have to waste too much energy and the pain was significantly more endurable but he didn’t know if that was a good thing or not.

Seunghyun cried again when he realized he couldn’t record the angel’s voice while he was singing. He’d been stupid enough to think that he could record it on his phone when he actually was the only one who could hear him speak. In an attempt to make him feel better Jiyong sang for a long time, the song being nothing but pure sadness written in a beautiful language that touched Seunghyun’s heart deeply. So deep that he couldn’t cry, only listen like before and feel his soul shatter to pieces. He did however manage to cry when the song ended and Jiyong cradled his head in his arms and cooed silently, wanting him to stop being sad although it was impossible.

Before he could blink they had moved to the bed, Seunghyun being emotionally drained and Jiyong tired, now able to fall into slumber along with the other man who seemed to be on the verge of slipping past the barrier of unconsciousness. With Jiyong breathing against his chest he felt secure but not enough to fall asleep peacefully. The angel promised him that he would still be there in the morning but it still wasn’t enough. Although he did fall asleep in the end he wasn’t completely satisfied and his dreams became unsettling.   

Jiyong watched him close his eyes and kissed his skin right above his heart, wishing with everything he had that Seunghyun would be well when he was gone. He could feel his body giving in faster than he thought it was going to and he predicted that he might have to say goodbye the next day. Still, he had promised Seunghyun that he would still be there in the morning and he was going to keep that promise. With that thought in mind he closed his eyes and let his body rest, sensing the familiar pull of sleep which occurred last night and let it take him, dragging him into darkness.

“Jiyong!” Seunghyun’s worried voice woke him and made him conscious of his surroundings again. He groaned slightly and lifted his arms, finding it increasingly more difficult than the past days. Luckily Seunghyun grabbed a hold of his hands quickly and held them securely.

“Thank God, you’re still with me…” Seeing that Jiyong was unable to move much more he grimaced before laying back down and pulling him into a full body embrace, sighing into his hair. The angel sighed as well, feeling content in his arms and listening to the dull heartbeat coming from the other man.

“Seunghyun…” The arms around his body tightened at the sound of his voice. “I’m sorry…”

Seunghyun knew what he was apologizing for. He could easily see how the angel looked sick, felt cold and his movement completely impaired. Jiyong was crying and trembling in his arms and Seunghyun wondered how anyone could be so mean as to take him away. He wanted to make it all better and he was positive Jiyong wanted the same but neither of them had the power to do anything but this.

After a while they attempted to see if the angel was able to move at all. Which he was after a few tries and powerful determination, he managed to stand on his feet with support and walk into the living room where it was lighter and more room. Seunghyun helped him lay down on the couch, seeing the pain on his face and for a second thought that maybe it would be better if Jiyong was relieved from his pain right now.

“How is it now? A bit better?” Worry coating his voice he smoothed the blonde hair away from the beautiful face. Jiyong would always be the most beautiful creature to him, even in this condition. The blonde inhaled before quirking his lips at him, cheeks a bit flushed. Whether it was from fatigue or any other emotion he didn’t know but the way their emotions went back and forth through their bond really did leave a mark on both of them.

“Much better,” He crouched and kissed Jiyong’s forehead. “Can you do me a favor?”

“Anything.” The striking blue eyes turned towards the window before returning to his face.

“Can you open the window for me?” ‘Will you leave me then?’ he thought but didn’t voice out loud and silently went to do as he requested. It was slightly cold and windy outside but Jiyong didn’t seem to mind at all. In fact he seemed to enjoy it and Seunghyun wouldn’t want to exchange the pleased look on his face for anything in the world.

The pair turned quiet then, Seunghyun sitting on the floor resting his head next to Jiyong’s on the couch and they stared into nothing together. He played with the angel’s fingers so he could hear his thoughts, feel his emotions, know he was there.

It wasn’t until Seunghyun felt a feather tickle his nose that he was snapped back to attention, away from his vacant fantasies and realized that there were feathers everywhere. Without thinking he jolted to his feet, looking around and down at Jiyong who was on his back, still gripping his hand as if he was afraid to lose it. Seunghyun knew what was happening from the look on his face and the sudden change of atmosphere in the room.

“No, Jiyong, don’t do this…” It was only a whisper and he fell to his knees, tears falling freely from his eyes and landing on the soft fabric of Jiyong’s shirt. The blonde closed his eyes and composed himself at the sight, trying his best to seem fine with this for the other man’s sake.

“I’m so sorry, I can only apologize, but it’s time for me to go,” Unable to hide the choked sob escaping his throat he watched the crestfallen expression before him. Seunghyun ducked his head and could only stare at his fingers still intertwined with Jiyongs as he heard the words he never wanted to hear. “Please, look at me.” Jiyong begged and he did without any hesitation.

“I love you, you know. Thank you, I will always watch over you, do not worry.” There was nothing he could do but lean down and press their foreheads together, watching as the angel’s eyes turned distant. He wanted him to at least know Seunghyun was there for him, he didn’t know what would happen to him later but he would do whatever he could to let him know he would always love him.

“I don’t want you to go, I love you, please-” He sobbed as he felt Jiyong cradle his head with his hands and look at him affectionately. A few moments passed before the arms fell from his head and was limp by his side, the blue orbs hidden underneath pale eyelids and Jiyong’s swirling emotions gone from his head. Seunghyun frantically tried to look for any life signs but there were none. Slumping down on the floor with a loud cry he clutched the fabric of the couch so hard he felt his chest might’ve burst. No one ever prepared him for the torture of his connection with Jiyong being broken and it was worse than any physical pain that he had felt before.

When he raised his head the fragile body was gone, only a few feathers left on the couch and he felt at a loss. His palms automatically tried to feel if he was still there, wanting one last chance to feel the soft skin under the pads of his fingers and see the enticing reactions it would pull from him. But there was nothing, only cold fabric and he could feel his resolve crumbling. Seunghyun fell and fell, along with his tears and he didn’t even notice how he sent one of the pillows flying across the room and crashing into a painting on his wall.

It was strange then, how comfortable it was to feel the sudden jerk into darkness. As if someone hit him in the back of his head, though gently without any pain, he fainted sprawled out on the couch with his limbs everywhere and his memories of Jiyong all gone.

TBC...

A/N: I'm sorry...? But thank you all for your great feedback TT <3 Still not quite done here! Wrapping this up. Tell me what you think!