Chapter 15

Time after time, I'd call or text Yoha to check what she's doing. Day after day, I would drop by Yoha's place to visit her. I'd ask her if she had already taken her medicines, and I'll make sure she would always listen to my sister's advise. I would always bring her milk and food and sing her songs. Every week, I'll ask my sister to come with me to Yoha's home just to check Yoha. My parents have supported me in this, that's why it gave me more courage to do this for Yoha.

I don't care if other people would call me over protective or tell me that I'm over reacting. All I know is that I have to make sure that Yoha will be alright. Some of my friends tried to remind me not to hope too much, but who are they to tell me that? They're not God. They can't tell me what I should do, and what I shouldn't do. Just like the old saying, the most hard headed people are those who are in love. Whatever you tell them, they just smile but wouldn't listen.

I'm trying everything I can to make sure that she's fine. I'll do whatever it takes just to make her happy. There were times when I'd actually see Yoha fighting the pain that she's feeling. I tried to look as brave as possible. Eventhough it hurts me to see how hard these things are for her, I don't want her to see my weak side because I know that she's been holding onto me. I can't and I won't let her down. I need to show her that I'm right here, and that she doesn't have to worry. All she needs to know is that I'll never give up on her, and we'll go through this together.

I've been doing everything I can, but it seems like fate was never really on our side. One sad rainy day, I brought Yoha in the hospital for another check- up. The doctors, including my sister told us that we should keep an eye on Yoha all the time.

"You should all be brave for her now. Don't stress her too much, and as always, lessen the things that she has to do. Or as much as possible, don't let her do anything at all." One of the doctors reminded. They talked to Yoha's parents and I, while Yoha was going through some tests. "You should ready yourselves more, to whatever might happen next." I couldn't take it anymore so I asked. "Can you tell us directly what you're trying to say?" I could feel my tears, threatening to fall again. Yoha's parents were already tearing up before the doctor could even say more. I looked at my sister and she shook her head and looked down apologetically. I saw Mrs. Park cry even harder and Mr. Park held his wife tightly in his arms.

"Your daughter's body had stopped responding to the medicines that we were giving her. The cancer cells had already spread widely through her body.." He sighed.

"I'm sorry. We couldn't let her go through chemotherapy because her body is too weak to undergo the treatment... We couldn't risk her to go through that.. She might get paralysed, or something even worse might happen to her." My sister explained. I couldn't hold my tears anymore, and I cried, again. My sister patted my back and but I quickly wiped away my tears. "Ani, I shouldn't be doing this.." I thought aloud. I tried not to cry as hard as I could, but that very moment, when I heard that there's no more hope for Yoha, I realized that I could lose her any time now. I became very afraid that I had nothing to do but cry. Out of all, people... Why? Why her?

"How are we supposed to tell her now?" Mrs. Park asked, still crying hard. My sister looked at me and then to Mrs. Park. "She already knows everything about this.." My sister confirmed and my mouth dropped agape. "W-What? H-How come.. Why d-didn't she..?"

"The moment she found out about this, she asked me to keep it a secret. But it's only been three days ago when she knew about this. I know I wouldn't be able to keep this as a secret.. I'm sorry, I should've told you all as soon as I knew." She explained. "Please be by her side. She'll need you all now, more than ever. Specially you, Woohyun-ah.." I stopped crying at once and decided to pay more attention to what my sister is trying to tell me.

"She told me that she doesn't want to hurt any of you. She's been trying to project a brave character, but the truth is, she's very much afraid, just like us.. She wanted to be healed.. She wanted to be okay. But she has to face the crucial truth.. time is running out for her.." My sister said and also teared- up. "We all have to be here for her.. We must... Okay? We must prepare ourselves to whatever may happen.. Cause any time.. Any time now, she'll be taken away from us." She continued and cried even harder.

Is this for real? Am I really hearing this? How can such a painful thing like this be a reality and not a nightmare?

We all sat there as we cried our heart out. Until all of us were startled when a nurse suddenly came in, pushing Yoha's wheelchair. Even if her body looked really weak, she still managed to show us her bright smile. The smile that I have always loved. The smile that would always make my day.. The smile that would give me the courage never to give up.. That smile.. that I could never bear to lose. That smile, that only Yoha could give me.

I quickly went to her and bent to her level. She held my face and asked with a very weak voice, "Has unnie told you everything?" I held her hand and nodded. She pulled me into a hug and patted my back, while I just cried even harder. "Don't be like this, please? I don't want to see you like this.." She pleaded. I tried hard and did what she said. I somehow managed to stop my tears from falling and smiled at her. "That's more I like it." She commented. She looked at parents and said, "Appa, Umma, I want to see your smiling faces, I don't want to see you cry." In an instant, her parents did the same which made Yoha smile.

** Yes Yoha, smile. Smile more often. You look a lot better when you're smiling. You make me stronger when you're smiling..**

After a few more reminders, we all headed home because Yoha needs to have her rest already. At the ride back home, I never did let go of her hand. If I could hold her forever like this, I would.