The line between the feeling of friendship and romance was sometimes a thin one. That's how Jaemin felt about himself and Doyeon, he'd been her friend because he'd had interest in her from the beginning. Whether he knew it, or it was just some subconscious feeling he chose to ignore; he'd always looked at her differently than he had others. From the time he saw  her staring at the old tire swing, he'd thought she was pretty. But, he knew most people thought that of her. It was sort of a passing feeling of attraction, after all he could say just as easily that Mark was a good looking guy--but of course he doesn't harbor the same feelings for Mark. So, he never thought much of it, other than that he knew she was pretty, and had a good personality that drew him in; sometimes against his own will. 

He wanted to pound his head against the wall. How could he be so stupid? He's known Doyeon for almost two years, and in that time he'd told himself she was an acquaintance, turned friend, turned best friend, he never had any intention of furthering their relationship past the point it had already gotten to. He felt stupid thinking that though, because their was a time he never intended to move their relationship past neighbors. "How did this even happen?" He asked himself, the darkness of his bedroom feeling like his own therapist as he allowed some thoughts to leave the confines of his mind.

As he thought that over, he realized that he'd always wanted more. At first he just wanted to hear her talk, then see her smile, then hear her laugh...the laugh that never failed to make him smile wider. And here he was again, deciding that being just another one of her best friends wasn't enough. A part of him wanted to act like his revelation hadn't happened, to act--no, to become--fine with just being her friend. To finally stop wanting more. 

Maybe he'd have an easier time coming to terms with everything if it wasn't because of his two biggest obstacles: one being, she'd blatantly told him she hadn't had feelings for anyone since Jaeyoon, and that she didn't think she would for a long time. Two being, their friends all thought something was going on between her and Jeno. He noted that one and two contradicted each other, how could she like Jeno when she doesn't like anybody? The answer is; she isn't the one he was worried had a crush. He was more worried that Jeno had also developed feelings for Doyeon, it would make sense if he had. But, if he has, what does Jaemin do? Pretend that he doesn't think of Doyeon in a romantic way? Or disregard his worrying regarding Jeno's feelings and pretend to be oblivious so he doesn't feel bad about liking her? 

Why did feelings have to be so complicated? And why did it have to be Doyeon?

~~~

Doyeon had long since disregarded the letter in a drawer. She felt like she was procrastinating, but in reality she'd already decided to leave it be for at least the time being. Talking to Jaemin last Tuesday had left her a bit uncertain on what to do. But, still she felt like now wasn't the time to read it, after all, if she was able to go without an explanation for the past three years, she'd be fine waiting at least a little while longer. Though, it was easy to see how curiosity killed the cat, she was worried she wouldn't understand how satisfaction brought it back. What if she was just left more hurt by reopening the past she was so close to fully being away from? It felt like a double edged sword, that she just wasn't quite ready to unsheathe. 

The sound of the doorbell ringing distracted her. 

It was currently Saturday, and Doyeon was just lazing around the house. She was supposed to go over to Jeno's to work on a school project, but he decided to come over instead since it was snowy outside. It was set to be the last snow of the season, now that spring was just around the corner. Doyeon had mixed feelings about the seasons changing, on one hand she loved winter, but on the other she was ready for longer and sunnier days.  Doyeon opened the door, and sent him a tight lipped smile. Jeno met it with his signature eye smile. "Jun is absolutely livid that I left without him." Jeno chuckled as they both walked into the living room. 

"I still don't understand why he likes me so much." Usually children weren't her biggest fans, since she wasn't th