"You're delusional if you think any of us care for you." His words hit her like a splash of boiling water to her hand; painfully but not completely unexpected. She hadn't noticed just how high the water would jump, but she knew there was a possibility of it hitting her. He hadn't been acting the same, none of her old friends had. They looked at her funny, as if she was less now that her mother had left, because her mother hadn't taken her and Taehyun with her. "Doyeon, you've been acting all gloomy, you're constantly dragging everyone's mood down." He told her. She didn't see it like that, after all they'd all laugh when they made her go to the classrooms to get their bags, and then somehow the door would magically lock and she could always hear giggles from down the hallway. Wasn't she at least making them happy? She couldn't find it in herself to ask that question, ask where she stood with them, why they changed--no, not changed, why they finally showed her their true colors. "In case you haven't caught on, we aren't together anymore." 

She didn't go back to school after that day. 

~~~

Doyeon slammed her bedroom door shut. She immediately headed for the shower, she didn't bother taking her uniform off as she let the water hit her. It rinsed the tear streaks from her face. The memories of her running home after she was finally able to force herself to stand up and walk without falling back to the cold grass. She'd left her coat in the classroom, along with her bag. The only thing she had was her phone, which had been in her blazer pocket, now it was thrown on her tile floor, she could still hear the ringtone that hadn't stopped since two minutes after she was out of the classroom. She had to focus on steadying her breathing, because right now she was on the verge of hyperventilating. She felt weak, and humiliated. She wasn't supposed to still feel this way, hadn't enough time passed? "Don't think about it, don't." She told herself in a voice muffled by the mix of the shower and her tears. When repeatedly shaking her head wasn't working, she slumped down on her knees and reached for her phone over the edge of the showers base. She didn't care that her hand was getting the device wet. 

The ringing only went on for a few seconds before the line was picked up, it took another few seconds for the voice on the other line to speak. "Doyeon?" Taehyun sounded slightly distressed, "I just got off the phone with Chenle, what happened?" He asked, she heard the sound of chatter in the background. 

"Taehyun, do you remember Jaeyoon?" Doyeon asked, she knew her voice sounded scruffy from crying, and so she turned off the shower so he could at least hear her better. Her knees went up to her chest as she tried to compact herself. 

"Doyeon, why are you talking about him?" She thought she heard the sound of his chair scrapping against the floor, indicating he'd just stood up. 

Doyeon laughed bitterly, "He's in my class now, and...I think I might have freaked out a little." She tried to downplay what happened, but Taehyun had already heard enough from Chenle to know it was more than a little. The funny thing was, Doyeon didn't even know Chenle and Taehyun were on the friendship level of having swapped numbers. Taehyun was now fourteen, so  it wasn't like there was some big , so she really wasn't too surprised by that fact. 

"You're at home right?" He asked, knowing from the sound of the shower earlier that she was, "Do you want me to come home?" He asked, "Or call Dad?" He must have been remembering just how bad her episodes used to be, because the panic in his voice kept rising.

Doyeon shook her head, "No, It's okay...I'll just see you when you get back." 

He paused for a moment, "Are you sure?" He asked. 

"Yes." Doyeon told him, she would already be in enough trouble for ditching class, she didn't want Taehyun to be in the same situation as her. Taehyun babbled about how he'd be home as soon as he could, and not to let Jaeyoon shake her because she had no reason to care what someone like him says. Doyeon's lip actually managed to quirk up at his words, but it went away almost as quickly. Shouldn't she be there for Taehyun, and not the other way around? Before she could let that question darken her mood even more, she ended the call with Taehyun as quickly as she could. It felt nice to have talked to someone...she almost went to the group text her and the guys had, to tell them that she'd gone home. But, she got distracted by the sound of the doorbell ringing. She looked down at her soaked clothes, but she felt almost too numb to care. She pulled herself up, and got to her room's door before stopping, she didn't feel like walking to get the door. It was probably just a package after all, and if it was they would either leave it or drop it off tomorrow if  it needed to be signed for. Doyeon tapped her hand on the door handle, it wasn't locked, there was no giggling, no harsh words...but as tears started stinging her eyes again, it felt like  it was locked, and the words and laughter flew through her head as if she was still in the same place. 

"What's wrong with me!?" Doyeon asked exasperated, shutting her eyes so no more tears fell, she didn't ever cry like this. 

A knock on her balcony door made her open her eyes, and turn in the direction of said door. "Doyeon? I'm opening this door, I'm telling you now so don't accuse me of breaking and entering!" Jaemin said, the door handle wiggled a few times before he unlocked it--picking locks could be added to his list of skills--the door bursts open. Jaemin's eyes landed on her, her drenched hair and uniform, but they really stayed on her red rimmed eyes. She didn't break eye contact, but she couldn't see him well through the blur of tears that had just returned. Another memory hit her and she finally slumped over, seeping to the ground in a mess of tears. Jaemin rushed to her side, putting his arms around her as if it were second nature, despite the fact that they rarely touched ever. 

"Why did he have to come to our school?" Doyeon asked, so quietly that he barely caught it. 

Jaemin's brows furrowed, "Who? The new kid?" He asked.

Doyeon nodded against his arm. 

Jaemin wasn't sure what he was supposed to say, instead of trying to ask her more when she was clearly distressed; he just held her closer. Her hands gripped the fabric of his shirt as she cried. His hand patted her head soothingly, he felt so unsure of how to be here for her. After a few minutes of sitting like that, his text alert went off, he pulled his phone out, causing her to sit up again. She'd stopped crying already, and now looked just as unsure as he did. "Um," Jaemin began, "the guys headed back to school...but they said they were coming to my house for dinner tonight, if you want to join." Jaemin said. Doyeon put it together that they were the people who'd been at her front door. 

"Maybe." Is all she could say, "You should go back too."  

"You're probably right." Jaemin said, "Or, we could go do something fun," a playful smile, though a bit forced, lit up his features. "After you get changed of course." He said, looking down at her wet uniform, and his now damp blazer. 

Doyeon snorted, "Where would we even go? Don't you think people will question two teenagers out and about during school hours?" She questioned, they didn't necessarily look like they could pass for adults. 

Jaemin waved it off, "Don't worry, I know where we'll go." He said, helping her up to her feet. Doyeon looked at him unsurely. "Just trust me, I'm going to go get changed--be ready in ten!" He said, before hurriedly going towards the balcony door, he held the door open at the last second, "Make sure you wear something warm, it's freezing out." He told her before shutting the door fully, and she assumed climbing into his music room. 

Doyeon threw on a pair of ripped jeans and an emerald green long sleeve shirt, with a red semi-puffer jacket over it. She walked out front, waiting for Jaemin to come out. She didn't have to wait long, he came out about two minutes later in a pair of black sweatpants, and a zipped up blue puffy jacket. The colors reminded her of dory from Finding Nemo. 

Jaemin smiled as he unlocked his car, and they both climbed in. "Listen," he said, turning to look at her as his smile turned almost mischievous. "We're going to a very top secret place, I need to know that you won't tell anybody else." He put his pinky finger out towards her. 

"Not even the other guys?" She asked, suspicious.

Jaemin shook his head, extending his pinky even farther, "Not even them."

Doyeon put her pinky around his, sealing their pinky promise. He nodded with satisfaction before turning his attention to the car. "We'll be at our destination in twenty minutes." He said happily, turning the music volume up loud enough for noise, but not to cut her off if she chose to speak. Doyeon didn't, maybe it was the fatigue of her freakout, or the embarrassment of letting everyone see her in such a panic...or maybe it's just the fact of knowing she