"Ji, it hurts seeing you like like this. I don't know what happened that night. But, please stop! I beg you. Since she's left you've been drinking and smoking. Your fans are worried. We're worried, even though you had promised you'll stop. But, you haven't. I know you still haven't move from Yo-"

"Why would I even care that ?! If you don't have anything to say nice, please leave." I tell him, taking another smoke and exhaling it, whilst staring out from my penthouse suite at the city that never falls asleep. 

"I know Ji. I'm your best friend. I know everything you're feeling. And, here you're trying to tell me that her news of dating with that Chang-wook guy didn't affect you? You've been holed up in this room? You can deny it as much as you can, but I always know the truth. It's been seven years since the break-up. Why can't-"

"Get out!" I order him, calmly, though I was running out of patience.

"But-" 

"Get out!" I repeat my command. I could hear him take a large sigh.

"Fine, but I'll be back here tomorrow." He says in a stern tone.

"Click!"

Another relationship destroyed. 

Maybe that's what I deserve... To be alone. Alone in this world, even though I have everything in this world, but I'm still empty.

"Ting!'"

Grabbing my phone from the night stand, I unlock it. 

'Had a great time last night!' - unknown number. 

Who is this? 

Blocked.Deleted.

I was at home last night. 

I don't know why netizens think that I'm a player. The biggest player is... why am I thinking about her again?!

Sighing, I lean against the window. 

My heart pounding rapidly in my chest, raising my hand up I rest it on my heart. 

My phone had been buzzing constantly, probably Yang Hyun Suk Sajangnim.

Even though, I'm grateful that I've received an all-kill in just in a hour. It still doesn't fill my emptiness. For some unknown reason it doesn't make me feel happy, rather It makes me feel absolutely nothing. 

"I know you wrote the song for her, Ji." That's what Youngbae said. "I know most of the songs you write is about her. Isn't that the reason why Nana and Kiko left as well?" 

Maybe, that's one of the reason why my relationships haven't worked out. 

Flashback:

"You're still in love with her," Nana said, staring at me with pity in her eyes, as we sat in the YG studio room. 

"What are you talking about?" I ask, utterly confused as to where this conversation was going. 

"I'm talking about her. You haven't forgotten her Ji. It's been ages and you've still haven't moved on. And, here I thought maybe I'll be the one to help you. Bring out the good boy inside you. Bring out Kwon Jiyong-"

Kwon Jiyong is dead, except the name. 

"But, everyday I'm losing hope. We haven't been on a proper date since last year. I just don't know what you expect of me? I can't be flying to and fro from Japan to Korea just to be here, Ji. And, whenever you do come to Japan, not once did you come to meet with me. It's like I'm no one to you." I could hear the hurt in her tone. "I've even destroyed my relationship with Kiko, because of you!"

I didn't know what to do. I was never good at soothing girls.

"What do you want to do?" I ask, I could feel a large lump forming in my throat.

"Let's break up." She says, tears rolling down her cheeks as she stood up, grabbing her coat and bag. 

"Okay." With that she had slammed the door shut, and had disappeared from my life,  leaving me to stare at the empty seat. My chest has started to ache and my fingers squirming. 

I know Teddy hyung has stashed a secret pack of cigarettes somewhere in one of these drawers. There they are. Taking out the pack, I pull out one cigarette, lighting it up. It's hard to give up on them. 

Inhaling it few times, I throw it on the floor, stepping on it before picking it up and throwing it away.

The last thing I want is my member finding out that I smoked. I got back to editing my songs for my new album.

Flashback Ends.

I know I'm just adding to their concern. I could see it in their eyes, when they think I'm not looking at them. I could see their pity expression. 

But, now. I just want to give up like TOP hyung did. 

YG doesn't want the truth out, but we all know he tried to commit suicide. He had lied to us. He was supposed to be our strong hyung, but seeing him lying on the bed unconscious. He seemed far away from strong, he looked weak. Maybe, I should kill myself too, at least I'll be in a happy place. This world has nothing to offer anymore, except sadness. 

No, you can't. You have to show her that she doesn't effect you anymore.

Taking my phone out, I text Soo Joo. She's in Korea for a modelling gig, before she has to fly back the day after tomorrow.

'Want to have dinner tomorrow?' 

It didn't even take a second before I received a reply.

'Hell yeah! I know this restaurant. It just opened recently, we can go there?' She asks, I don't know any new restaurant. Well, maybe because I haven't been reading the news. 

Stop lying.

'Yeah, sure. Meet you tomorrow. I'll pick you up. You should probably text your boyfriend otherwise he'll think you're cheating,' I text back. 

She send me an 'pulling tongue' emoji.

'I will. I will.' She texts back. 

I'm grateful to have friends like her. Always there when I need them. 

I lie down on my bed feeling tired. Not bothering to change, I go under my duvet. The bed is humongous. Feeling lonely, I put on soft songs on the speaker.

At least, that'll reduce the feeling of emptiness... only for a bit.

...

You know when you want to avoid some people, but it just doesn't happen. That's what I'm feeling right now. Annoyed at the fact that I can't make them disappear. 

Why can't they give us privacy?! I could hear the flash going outside my car. Go away! I had wanted to shout out, but contained myself before driving away quickly. Taking pictures is one thing, but banging on my car and standing in front of it is another. 

Driving past all of them, I drive in the direction where I know Soo Joo is staying, it wasn't far away as after ten minutes or so. I was beeping outside her resident. 

I could see her running in her dress toward my car. 

"Finally!" I exclaim, as soon as she had sat on the passenger seat.

"I'm here. I'm here. Let's go." She says, putting her seatbelt on.

Driving towards the new restaurant as she gave direction. Apparently, it was only a five minutes drive from her place. It's called 'Divine', and people have been "raving" about it. Her words, not mine. 

We didn't need to wait in the line, as Joo had already booked us in.

Stepping inside the restaurant, I glance around staring at the interior designs. 

"It's so pretty." I heard Joo mumble, nodding my head to agree with her statement.

I look around again, but this time at the people who were sitting around.

Wow, that's a lot of peop-What are they doing here?

I seemed to have gone numb. I couldn't feel my bl