Chapter 7- Hidden Me

“Ohhhh…you’re actually pretty good at this.” Mingyu praised Chan, ruffling the younger’s hair.

“…Well…Wonwoo hyung makes me play this with him a lot whenever we come here.” Chan blushed, not used to the compliments. Amongst the three of them, Chan’s record on the basketball machine was always the lowest. Thus, he would always get teased by the older two.

“He likes to play this? I thought you guys don’t let him participate in physical activities?” Mingyu raised a brow.

“A little physical activity is fine. As long as he doesn’t overwork himself. But how did you know about that?” Chan asked, opening up a little. He figured if Wonwoo trusted this guy before him, and even had that little bit of attraction, it was a positive signal for him to open up.

“Erm…kind of learnt that the hard way…Hansol got so mad at me when I made Wonwoo dance. But that was before I knew about his condition…” Mingyu scratched the back of his head, smiling awkwardly.

“Ah…that was what he meant by ‘almost killing’ Wonwoo hyung yesterday huh…anyways. Hansol hyung and I. We’re two TOTALLY different people. For me, I think that it’s good for Wonwoo hyung to do some sort of exercise. But Jun hyung and Hansol hyung didn’t want to take that risk…not after Wonwoo hyung losing his consciousness.” Chan explained. They were talking about me yesterday? Mingyu’s eyes widened, hearing what Chan just told him.

“W-what exactly is he…suffering from?” Mingyu couldn’t contain his curiosity.

“He…” Chan turned around when he heard familiar laughter coming from a distance. 2 mops of dark hair appeared before them, Wonwoo currently being piggybacked by Hansol.

“Come on Chan…let’s go racing! Wonwoo hyung !” Hansol laughed, throwing the older off his back.

“Yah! Choi Hansol! Are you trying to kill me?” Wonwoo chided, hitting the younger’s shoulder.

“I don’t want to play with you…I’m still not over this morning…” Chan rolled his eyes, persistent on staying beside Mingyu.

“Oh come on! You’re still upset over that? Let’s make a move before Wonwoo hyung whines about us ruining his date!” Hansol said, pulling a very unwilling Chan along.

“So…what were you guys talking about before Hansol and I crashed along?” Wonwoo asked.

“N-nothing much…I was just asking about your condition.” Mingyu answered.

“Let’s go!” Wonwoo smiled, pulling Mingyu’s arm towards one of the shooting machines.

“For your information. I at these games.” Mingyu said, holding up one of the guns.

“It’s okay. I’ll save us.” Wonwoo laughed, as they began the game. It ended with Wonwoo playing solo because Mingyu’s character died earlier in the game. Mingyu stood next to Wonwoo, watching the older play. Wonwoo looked really happy while he was playing. The edges of his lips quirking up, eyes creasing into a line and most importantly, he was laughing wholeheartedly as he shot down each and every single monster on the screen. Mingyu couldn’t help but smile and feel his heart beating faster upon watching the older before his eyes.

“Anything else you wanna play here? Or we could go somewhere else and just leave the 2 kids here.” Wonwoo asked, snapping Mingyu out of his trance.

“E-erm…I’m fine with anything really…” Mingyu answered, taking 2 steps back.

“Okay…I say we dump the kids.” Wonwoo smiled, grabbing Mingyu’s hand as he led the way out of the arcade. The two of them were walking down the streets once more, Mingyu just following Wonwoo’s lead. They came to a café where Wonwoo ordered hot chocolate to go and Mingyu waited at a seat by the windows. This reminds me of the very first time…when we had breakfast together. Mingyu’s mind couldn’t help but to recall that very day, a frown gracing his face when he remembered how rude Jeonghan was.

“Hey cutie. What are you thinking about? You look like you’re about to kill someone.” Wonwoo quirked one of his eyebrows as he passed one of the cups to Mingyu.

“N-nothing.” Mingyu stuttered, following Wonwoo’s lead as they walked out of the café to a nearby park.

“Don’t frown. Life is too short to feel sad. Smile more…you look cuter that way.” Wonwoo grinned when Mingyu’s face started blushing. They sat down on a swing each at the playground. AH….I need to learn how to control my stupid face…Mingyu looked away for a moment, before directing his vision back to Wonwoo when his face wasn’t burning.

“So…you haven’t told me about…your results…” Mingyu hesitated, taking pauses between his sentence.

“It’s nothing really…blood test results came back with the advice of taking lesser alcohol…” Wonwoo grimaced at that thought.

“Why do you seem so upset at the thought of taking lesser alcohol…? In my opinion it isn’t even that good…you’ll just end up doing stupid things…” Mingyu said.

“…You’ll never understand. Alcohol is the only thing that takes me away from reality…and every single problem. What do you even know? You say that it isn’t good but I remember bringing a drunk kid called Kim Mingyu home…” Wonwoo teased.

“…It was that one time. And I was forced into that party. Whatever. From the way I see things…you have a pretty nice family…you know. Granny, Hansol and Chan…what’s so bad about your life?” Mingyu asked.

“That’s what it seems doesn’t it?” Wonwoo’s tone changed into a serious one. The childlike expressions on his face faded, a grim one taking over. Mingyu looked over his shoulder to have a peek at the older, and he swore he saw a gleam of sadness.

 “You know…life is really just full of crap. You can never have hope for anything good to happen. Fine. I’ll live with the fact that my parents don’t want me. But life decides to play another game. When I was 15…I suddenly lose unconsciousness after feeling breathless. When I woke up in the hospital, the doctors told me that I had been living with atrial septal defect. Hah. What a joke. That was when all sorts of physical activities have been snatched out of my hands. You must be thinking. This kid is so whiny. It’s just physical activities. Why is he acting like the world is ending. There are bunch of people dying out there.” Wonwoo let out a dry chuckle.

“Well. Let me tell you something. I would ing rather be dead than in this state.” Wonwoo said, his voice shaking. Mingyu was silent the entire time, trying to take in all the information thrown at him within that few minutes.

“Why?” Was his only response. It earned him a scoff from the older.

“Because it hurts. Grandpa…worked so hard just so he could earn money for me to undergo that surgery…but guess what. Even before he could earn that amount…he passed away. And then…granny started to go out to work…just so she could continue saving the money. It hurts so much…to hear her complain about her backaches. She would always ask me to help her apply those medicated patches…It hurts. And that’s why. I don’t even want to continue living. So that they can stop working so hard just to prolong my life.” Wonwoo cried, tears falling out of his eyes.

He never told Hansol or Chan how he truly felt. It would only make the two younger ones feel guilty and helpless. That was why Wonwoo always pretended to be strong. That was why he liked to make unnecessary jokes. Just so everyone would feel better about the situation. He needed to be the strong one so granny wouldn’t collapse. He needed to be strong to support Hansol and Chan. He himself truly wanted to live longer, but if he told them what he really wanted. They would’ve to work even harder than now, push themselves even further. And the last thing Wonwoo wanted was for another one of his loved ones to leave him.

Mingyu felt his insides shrink, inhaling a sharp breath. Indeed. He never knew that Wonwoo was suffering so much underneath that flirty, and cheerful façade. As he heard the older sob by his side, he got off his seat, kneeling before him. He knew at this point in time, words no longer mattered. He pulled the older into an embrace, rubbing his back to comfort and ease his nerves.

“You don’t have to act so strong all the time. I promise I’ll always be here to hear you out.” Mingyu said. He could hear the older let out louder cries, truly letting go of his strong front.

“S-sorry…but I think my legs are…falling asleep.” Mingyu apologized sheepishly after a few moments of silence. The older had stopped crying, only holding onto Mingyu’s warm embrace for comfort. Wonwoo immediately let go, turning around to wipe any remains of tears on his face. Mingyu got up from the ground, only to fall back onto his .

“Ah…this is bad…I can’t even get up.” Mingyu laughed at himself as he struggled to get up on his two feet. Wonwoo let out a small chuckle before he got up and offered a hand to help the younger up. Mingyu thanked the older as he sat back in his previous seat, kicking at the sand beneath his feet. Wonwoo’s phone rang at that very moment, startling the two boys.

“Yeah Hansol?” Wonwoo answered, his voice still a little hoarse from the crying.

“Okay…we’ll be right there. Don’t run off with Chan.” Wonwoo reminded before hanging up.

“Let’s go. They’re done at the arcade.” Wonwoo said as he stood up, patting his pants to make sure it wasn’t dirty. Wonwoo didn’t know what made him spill all his feelings out to Mingyu. Was it because he had been holding it in for too long? Or was it because he felt like he could trust the younger one? Whatever it was, he liked it. He felt much better telling another person all these feelings that no one knew. It felt like some of his burden had been lifted.

“Hyung! Where did you guys go?” Chan whined the moment Wonwoo and Mingyu appeared.

“Hyungs are too old for arcade these days…we just went for some hot chocolate.” Wonwoo smiled.

“Where should we go next?” Chan asked, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jacket.

“Let’s go somewhere Hansol wants to…how about bowling? We haven’t gone for some time.” Wonwoo suggested.

“Well…I don’t really…know how to play?” Mingyu said with a questioning tone.

“I’ll teach you hyung!” Chan volunteered, as he hooked his arm with Mingyu, pulling the older down the streets. Upon seeing how well Chan got along with Mingyu within that few hours, it put a smile on Wonwoo’s face.

“Did something happen?” Hansol asked as he walked beside Wonwoo, trailing behind Chan and Mingyu who were busy pointing at everyt