Alone

Basic

"Nayeon?" Jeongyeon slowly lifted the bunny's hoodie off her head, "what's wrong? Why're you crying here?"
Nayeon didn't reply but instead turned her face away from Jeong.
She didn't want her to see her like this, helpless and alone, and most certainly she doesn't want to hear Jeongyeon's concerned voice. It might urge her to give in and hug her tight, which will lead her to spill the horrors of her past. And she didn't want that, she doesn't want Jeongyeon to know how pathetically sad she was before and how it haunts her until today. She spent years to build this strong, independent façade of hers, hoping that somehow her demons from the past would be buried deep inside,

"I'm fine. Just go." Her tears still flowing.
"No, you're not." Jeongyeon said it so gently and made Nayeon face her.
Her tears abruptly stopped when Jeongyeon's warm hands cupped her face and wiped the tears.
Before, only one person was able to stop her tears- Mina. But now, she had another person she opened her heart to. Nayeon can't deny this now, Jeongyeon paved her way through the walls she built and in to her dead heart. She did it herself and was probably unaware of how Nayeon feels for her bold and naive actions.

Jeongyeon continued to caress Nayeon's cheeks, urging her to tell the tale, making her feel that she's there and she will be there for her. Her heart broke when she saw that sorrowful look in Nayeon's eyes, she looked so vulnerable and helpless. It was far from her usual self-praising attitude.

Nayeon's heart began to thump loudly again, she can barely hold it in. Jeongyeon's hand felt so warm on her cheeks and her eyes were fixated only to hers, it made her feel safe. Will she tell her? But what if she'll leave like how everyone did? Even Mina. She has Chaeyoung now, there's no need for a Nayeon in her life.
Nayeon's tears began to pile up again. She can't bear it anymore, everybody's leaving her, those people whom she called friends and welcomed to her world, even her parents left her, and now Mina. She can't, she just can't fathom everything, mostly that feeling of being lonely and vulnerable. She shivered and tears began to drastically flow again.

This time Jeongyeon didn't wipe her tears but her hands were still there on her cheeks unwilling to let go. She was afraid that Nayeon might break and fall into pieces when she let go. She held her like she was the only person that mattered in this world. And now that she started to cry again, she did what her heart dictated. She removed one hand from her cheek and and held Nayeon's hand. She made her feel the warmth, gently squeezing it. Jeongyeon removed her other hand from her cheek and tucked Nayeon's loose strands of hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead. Reassuring that she's there and will not stop until she felt better, until she felt secured. Jeongyeon then opened her arms to engulf the crying bunny in her embrace. Nayeon buried her face on her neck and sobbed. Jeongyeon caressed her hair and tightened her hug, providing a momentary safe haven.
"Let it all out. I'll be here, don't worry. Take your time, I won't let go." Jeongyeon whispered with all her heart.

Nayeon cried and cried until Jeongyeon's sweater was soaked on the shoulder. They stayed like that until Nayeon calmed down and began to speak,
"Everyone's leaving. I'm left alone again." She said in between sniffs,
"I don't even know how I deserved this. I tried my best to be strong and forget but why, why is it all coming back again?"
Jeongyeon broke the hug to face Nayeon,
"What do you mean?"
Nayeon wiped her tears and continued,
"Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for Mina and Chaeyoung but... Mina, she's all that I have. Chaeyoung has you, your parents, and friends. I just... it's just painful that someone's taking her away. And I can't help but remember what happened before..."
Jeongyeon wanted to tell her that she's there but she felt like Nayeon wasn't done talking so she just waited until she was ready to talk.
"... I was playing hide and seek with the people I called friends. I was it. I was lingering in the garden, seeking. Until I heard one of their voices,

'I don't wanna play with her, let's go home. She's not fun to be with.'

"I hid behind a bush to hear the whole conversation, I was seven back then. I didn't understand at first what she meant, I was naive. I shouldn't have listened,

'Play with her some more, can't you see she's giving you expensive gifts? Those are branded! We talked about this, Sueji. Just an hour, okay? After that you could play with your real friends. Now run along.' The kid ran away

'Oh, Mrs. Im! Hi!'
'What was that with your daughter?'
'It's nothing. I told her to go back and play with Nayeon.'
'Okay then. Here, it's a month worth of playtime with Nayeon.' Mrs. Im handed her a thick envelope which was filled with cash.

"I wasn't quite sure what really happened back then but my heart felt like it was being continuously pinched. I wanted to know, so I did something I shouldn't have, again,

'Sueji! Sueji!'
'What?'
'Do you enjoy your time here?'
'Yeah, sure, whatever.'
'What if I say it's okay you don't come?'
'Really? That's good! Tell mommy! So that I can freely play with my friends.'
'We're not friends?'
'Hahahaha! Nope! We were only forced to come here because your mommy said you don't have friends.'

"I stood there frozen. My chest hurt so much, I clenched it. Everything's still fresh like it happened yesterday. Being such a child, I confronted my parents and that's when my life shattered before me,

'My friends told me we weren't friends! And you only forced them to! Why would you do that?!'
'Nayeon, we were doing it for you, honey.'
'I hate you! I hate you so much!'

"My father stood up and ruined my life, took my soul, and crushed my heart,

'You?! Hate us?! Stop making me laugh! You're lucky we kept you! You weren't even part of our plan! And you dare to whine?! We spent millions for you to have a luxurious life! What rights do you have to question our decisions?! I shouldn't have agreed your mother to raise you! You're a disgrace! You shouldn't have been born.'

"My father's voice still rings in my ears. I went numb after that, questioning my existence. The pain, it's still here, it won't come off. I couldn't even move from my spot, the only thing in motion was my tears and it's uncontrollable flow. I was still standing there even after my parents left, screaming and arguing. I stood there for hours, staring blankly. When someone tapped my shoulder, I expected it to be them, to apologize. But what's left of my heart crumbled when it wasn't them, it was one of the maids who comforted me.
I was numb for years until Mina came and brought her little drops of sunshine." Nayeon's tears started pouring again. She started crying all over again. Jeongyeon surrounded her with her arms, hugging her tight but Nayeon broke the embrace and stared in Jeongyeon's eyes.
She moved her face closer and closer. As she was about to close the gap between their lips, Jeongyeon took a step back, leaving Nayeon with a baffled faced that immediately turned into a pained expression, 
"You should go home, Nayeon. I'll walk you." Jeongyeon said with guilt.
Nayeon bowed her head, holding back tears. She was hurt. There was nothing more to describe what pain she felt, she was just rejected. It stung. This person standing in front of her was like them, she didn't care for her. She was just accidentally there. And Nayeon felt stupid that she thought Jeongyeon was different. She erupted in tears.
"Hey, what's wrong?" Jeongyeon reached out her hand to try and calm her down but Nayeon stepped back,
"Don't touch me! You're no different from all of them!"
Jeongyeon wanted to explain but the words were stuck in when she saw Nayeon's eyes, she was hurt but it was the hatred in them that made Jeongyeon stop. It crushed her heart. Every part of her body ached,
"Nayeon, I-" Jeongyeon's words were bluntly cut by Nayeon's cold stare
"Next time, if you don't have any thoughts of concern or sympathy at all, don't try and act all caring. It feels ty to be rejected." The coldness in her voice was unfamiliar to Jeongyeon. Did she do this?
If she would only let her explain herself, she would know.
"Nayeon, if you would just listen-"
"I won't. I will never again." Nayeon snapped, "Don't even try explaining. I guess I really was just one of those basic es for you."

 

 


A/N: What is Jeongyeon's explanation? Curious? Find out next chapter. :)
I hope you liked it.

Again, I want to thank you all! You guys are the best! Keep the comments coming! xx
I've been so busy recently sorry TT

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Thank you!
jiachaeng
Should I write an epilogue? But it'll take some time though hehe :)

Comments

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arkiminjeong
#1
Chapter 30: The angst parts of your story are always just 1-3 chapters but rips and claws hearts in 8D. I literally felt the pain. It's like experiencing a real heartbreak. Even on the fluff parts, I can feel the fondness. You really got a way with words. I really love the way you write. Thank you so much authornim. Hoping to read more from you in the future. ❤️
K_1807
#2
Chapter 30: Wow, this story is really great. Thank you for the story author-nim. I love this! <3
iro_ori #3
Chapter 30: I love thiiiiiiiis! Hope there's an epilogue tho 👉👈 Thanks for this awesome story!
GoldenMultistan #4
Chapter 30: Ok, wait... What the . This story made me feel so many emotions it's insane.... Omg I love it. This was AMAZING!!! A bit sad that there was no epilogue but I loved it nonetheless!
wifeyjeong
#5
Chapter 30: this was so beautiful. i loved seeing your writing improve by each chapter and oh my god the last scenes were so well-written. so were all of the other scenes! thank you so much for writing this. i loved it <3
wifeyjeong
#6
Chapter 20: AHHHJJJJJJJDHDJDHHHHHH THAT WAS SO SMOOTH
twcnc1101 #7
Chapter 23: Although I'm here for 2yeon, dude I'm really enjoying this michaeng jealousy thing HURT-T
nayeoff01 #8
Chapter 30: I can't put down in words what I want to say...you just played with my poor heart full of 2yeon
dkdldb #9
Chapter 30: This was a nice story
saovanmai #10
Chapter 30: Is there an epilogue for this??? It would be gr8 to read. Regardless, I luv this work thanks for writing it!