7 – “I don’t want to have a baby.” 
27 – “Process what you said.”
28 – “I took a test…”
100 - “Please tell me this is just a sick joke…”

“Oppa,” I said as I carefully entered the bedroom, shaking from the news I just discovered, “we need to talk.” He looked up from his laptop and removed the one earbud he had in and looked at me with concern in his eyes.

I didn’t want to have to tell him this, but I couldn’t hide it from him either. I was just nervous that he would reject me and this new found life inside of me. Yoongi told me he never wanted to have kids. It was something that he was very upfront with me about from the start of our relationship almost 4 years ago. 

He didn’t want to get married and he didn’t want kids. 

I think the label of the attachment was too much for him to handle when so much of his life was controlled by contracts and binding legal documents, so I could understand the not wanting a legal document to control his love life, and with kids, he travels a lot and it doesn’t look like BTS is losing any momentum as the years go by, they keep cranking out hit after hit, so he doesn’t want to be an absent parent and have his child(ren) resent him for it. He also said that after BTS he’ll be too old to be a new parent. I was upset with that at first, but eventually grew to accept it since I can’t imagine my life without him in it.

But now, I might have to. This positive test I had in my pocket could ruin everything between us in just mere seconds, and now I’m not sure I’m ready for this. I won’t let him convince me to get rid of our precious miracle, and I won’t let him tell me we’re giving the baby up after it’s born. I’m going to hold my ground  that our precious sugarplum would stay with us no matter what.

“What’s wrong jagi?” Yoongi asked me as he patted the bed, signaling me to come join him. I was too nervous to sit down though, I was pacing, which was probably not helping either of our anxiety. “Please, Jagi, you’re scaring me. What’s going on?”

“I took a test…” The look on his face was one of pure horror, but I could tell he was trying to hide it for my sake.

“What kind of a test?” His voice was shaking now.

I pulled the positive pregnancy test out of my pocket and gently set it on the bed in front of him with my hands shaking uncontrollably and tears burning behind my eyes.

“What does 2 red lines mean?” He asked, the calm facade he was trying to uphold clearly shattered now. He already knew what it meant. We had a couple scared before and he knew that one line meant negative. He was refusing to accept this was happening before we could even talk about it.

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